by Ava Miles
“I don’t want to talk about this,” he said. “Ever.”
“Too bad. I’ll meet you at your house once I’m finished here. After you open that folder you’re so upset about.”
His gray eyes smoldered.
“Open it,” she ordered.
He flipped the burgundy folder open. The way his eyes widened in shock should have made her feel better. It didn’t, though.
Maybe nothing would.
Chapter 35
Chase arrived home to find Barney as out of sorts as he was. The poor kitten was curled up in the center of Chase’s old scooter, and he gave him a mournful look when he burst in through the front door.
“I’m sorry,” he found himself saying as he picked up the kitten. “I know you were alone a lot after Bonnie left today, but I had a miserable day too.” On the way home in one of The Grand’s private cars, Chase had concluded today ranked in his top five worst days of all time.
Evan was talking about concluding their work in government contracting, and he and J.T. Merriam had planned what sounded like a new company—or a revised Quid-Atch, dammit!—behind Chase’s back. If he hadn’t been so out of the loop lately or tied up with Moira, this might never have happened.
Right now, he didn’t know which way was up, and to make matters worse, he’d learned over dinner that Maurie was causing trouble with their government contacts in Berlin and London by suggesting Chase’s leave of absence might be a sign of some bigger issues at Quid-Atch. After hearing Evan’s crazy, obscure plans, he had to conclude Maurie was on to something.
It didn’t help one bit that Maurie was doing everything he could to undermine Quid-Atch’s competitiveness and rattle him—something he’d obviously succeeded in doing. When he thought of their altercation at the bar over what had turned out to be Gary Frehlich’s resume, he was ashamed of himself. It hadn’t been one of his finer moments, but the sight of Moira handing that son of a bitch a business folder had been enough to break him. His mind had flashed to Trisha in that instant, and he hadn’t been able to stop himself from going nuclear.
And Moira…she was rightly pissed at him, but part of him thought it was her own fault. If she’d stayed away from Maurie like he’d asked, this never would have happened. Sure, she didn’t know any details, but she should have listened.
His phone rang, so he set Barney down and pulled it from his pocket. It was Evan. Not being one to put off a call, he picked it up.
“You rang?” he said. Though he could hear the sarcasm in his own voice, he didn’t feel the urge to dial it back.
“I heard about your fight with Maurie in the bar,” Evan said. “Are you okay? I won’t ask what happened. I’ve heard from both Moira and Maurie. Your enemy expressed his deep concern for you given your behavior tonight. I know you were upset, but what in the hell were you thinking?”
“You don’t want to call me on the carpet right now, Evan,” he said. “I acted poorly, and I know that, but we’re facing bigger issues right now. Maurie is doing a great job of undermining Quid-Atch beyond just the bid. I spoke with a few of our international partners at the fundraiser, and I need to fly to Europe to handle some problems he’s created.”
Everything seemed to be falling apart around him, and he was having trouble mustering the energy to roll up his sleeves and wade in again.
“You’re not cleared for international travel yet,” Evan said quickly. “Let me go—”
“No,” Chase shot back. “You’re talking about changing everything that’s made Quid-Atch successful. You’re the last person I’d send. And don’t talk about all your new ideas to our board of directors, Evan, because they aren’t going to like it. I sure as hell don’t.”
Silence permeated the line for what seemed an eternity. “You think I’m trying to undermine you? I was trying to come up with a better business strategy that wouldn’t see you hitting a wall, competing against assholes like Maurie. One that wouldn’t keep the people I care about from spending their whole lives away from their families.”
“Are you talking about getting rid of Quid-Atch or completely changing our mission? I’m confused, Evan, and really pissed off.”
There was an even longer silence on the line. “Honestly, I don’t know. All I know is that I don’t like the way things are and think we need to do something different.”
Chase couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “Until recently, you never cared what it took to make Quid-Atch successful. This is how it is, Evan. You can’t just change your mind. We have legally binding contracts and thousands of employees! Also, it’s totally unprofessional to discuss these new ideas with an outsider and not me.”
“Dammit, I thought we were better friends than this,” Evan said. “Chase, J.T. brought these ideas to me when we had lunch in Denver. He’s going through a major philosophical overhaul about doing business too. I agree with him across the board about the politics and greed. I think his ideas are damn good, and I also believe they’re financially viable. Can we sit down and talk about them? Today was just a primer. You’re the one who always creates the plan.”
He walked over to the window to open it, needing fresh air to cool him down. “I don’t have time. I’m leaving for D.C. in the morning with Darren and Rajan. Once I assure everyone at HQ that the sky isn’t falling, I’m going to fly to Europe and start knocking on doors. We’re in trouble, Evan.” He still wasn’t sure what to do about Maurie’s sabotage plans, but he’d think of something when he talked to legal in the morning.
“Andy hasn’t cleared you for full-time work yet or travel,” Evan said. “I want—”
“You don’t want to get in my way, Evan,” Chase said. “I’m going to hang up before I say something I might regret, but you might reflect on how you want to work with me moving forward. You can’t keep things like this from me. And come morning, my phone and email had better be fully operational.”
Pocketing his phone, he felt Barney paw at his leg. When he picked him up, the kitten crawled into his tuxedo jacket. “You cold? I’m blazing hot.” He wished he could go for a run. Usually it helped him burn off his anger. And he was mad as hell at Evan for pulling this shit on him.
Headlights appeared in the driveway, and he laid his forehead against the cold window pane. What was he supposed to say to Moira? Right now, his whole life seemed to have fallen apart.
She didn’t knock. No, she barged in with a gust of cold air. Her face was flushed, and he knew she was pissed. Barney, who’d popped his head out, ducked back under the jacket after taking one look at her.
Moira slammed the door and then stalked to the dining room table and set down her clutch. No, threw it.
“How dare you!” she began. “I’ve been trying to see your side of things since I left the hotel, but I can’t get past how much you just insulted me. Someone you said you respected professionally. Worse, someone you profess to love. Did you really believe I would hand something confidential to Maurie Wallins or anyone else? Especially after sharing your bed?”
The force of her anger washed over him, and he felt the pain in his head crescendo to epic proportions. Screw legal, he decided. If he didn’t tell her, she’d never understand. “My ex-wife shared my bed, and she still gave Maurie confidential information. Of course, she also slept with him.”
Shock rippled across her face, and she wrapped her arms around herself. Score one for him.
“I didn’t know,” she said in a strained voice.
“No, you didn’t. I’m legally not supposed to talk about it to anyone. I didn’t act well earlier. I know that, and I’m sorry. Maurie is already doing his damnedest to make the most of my loss of judgment.”
Her hands fell to her sides, and he could tell her anger was waning. His was changing too, and the hurt he felt had teeth.
“Why wouldn’t you listen to me when I told you not to talk to him?” he asked. “Why couldn’t you trust I had a really good reason?”
She looked down and took her time before an
swering. “Because Evan said it was okay. I was only giving him a resume after Gary turned into a total mess about it. A resume.”
He shook his head. “It’s never just a resume with Maurie. You and Evan got played today, and I stepped right in to execute my part as well. That stops now. Maurie is orchestrating an insidious plot to undermine me—and Quid-Atch—at every turn.”
He couldn’t mention the fact that Evan seemed to be as well.
“Well, you certainly helped him tonight, didn’t you?” She glared at him. “You hurt me, dammit.”
He felt his throat thicken and fitted Barney closer to him. “You hurt me too, Moira. And you weren’t the only one today.” He took a deep breath, thinking about Evan. “I’m leaving tomorrow morning. After hearing all the shit that’s going down with Quid-Atch, I have a lot of holes to plug if we’re going to continue to be successful.”
She clenched her hands into fists by her side. “I see. What about us?”
Pain radiated through his chest, but after all the work he’d done with Ally, he knew it wasn’t physical. He would find a way to deal with it somehow. “I love you, and I’ll always be grateful for our time together, but this has been an interlude out of time. There’s no way we can be together in reality, not with the way my life is—or yours. I have responsibilities I’ve neglected, and Quid-Atch is suffering from it. A lot of people depend on me. I can’t let them down.”
He watched as she closed her eyes and bit her lip. Everything in him wanted to cross the room to her, comfort her, tell her there was a way for them to both have what they wanted. But that would be a lie.
Isn’t that would he’d realized today? He couldn’t have everything he wanted. It didn’t matter how much he wanted it.
“I see you’ve made up your mind then,” she said, finally opening her eyes. “Good luck getting everything squared away at Quid-Atch.”
She crossed over to the table and picked up her clutch. He fitted Barney even closer to him as he watched her walk to the door.
“Goodbye, Moira,” he said softly.
Her hand closed around the doorknob. She took a deep breath before looking up and gazing at him one last time. “Goodbye, Chase.”
He moved to the window to watch her pull away and stood there until the pain in his body grew too great to bear.
Chapter 36
Moira drove home on automatic pilot. Part of her couldn’t believe Chase was ending things between them after everything they’d experienced together. It was exactly what she’d feared, but she’d thought their love was stronger than that. She’d thought he was committed to finding a way for them to be together without compromising their careers.
After hearing how horribly his ex-wife had betrayed him, she was afraid he’d never truly be able to trust her. Hadn’t he proven that at the bar when he’d grabbed the folder from her hand? He had deep issues influencing his life, but it wasn’t her responsibility to fix them.
She wasn’t even sure she could.
When she pulled into her garage, she stayed in her car. God, Caroline was inside there with J.T. She thought about going to Natalie’s house, but this was her house, dammit. All she wanted to do was curl up in her bed.
The door to the garage opened, and she saw Caroline and J.T. in the doorway. Fully clothed, thank God. Her sister jogged forward and opened her car door.
“Moira, are you all right?”
She shook her head. “It’s over. He’s leaving. He…” Oh, God, the pain was rising over her, as unstoppable as a tide.
“Oh, honey,” Caroline said, leaning down to her level. “Come on. We’ll get you into a hot shower, and then you can tell me all about it.”
She wasn’t sure she wanted to talk about it at all. Right now she was desperate to forget the way Chase had clutched Barney to his chest while telling her they were through. How could that stupid man love a cat and not her?
“He’s a fucker,” she told Caroline, letting her sister help her out of the car.
“Of course he is,” Caroline said, putting her arm around her and leading her inside. “How could he possibly leave you if he wasn’t?”
“Tell me who he is,” J.T. said, “and I’ll beat the crap out of him.”
“Chase Parker, CFO extraordinaire, hothead, and stupidest man on the planet,” she told him.
“Consider it done,” J.T. said. “But I feel like I might have added to his bad day.”
Right now she didn’t care. “Doesn’t excuse him.”
But her rage sloughed off inside the shower, replaced by a deep sadness that sent tears cascading down her cheeks. Caroline finally pulled her from the shower and dried her off as she cried. Then she wrapped her in a fuzzy pink robe, laid her on her bed, and put her arms around her.
“He’s so stupid,” Moira repeated over and over again. “I can’t believe I fell in love with him.”
She fell asleep with everything hurting, and when she woke up in the morning, she was sure lead had filled her veins. Caroline was gone, and she felt tears pool in her eyes when she remembered her sister’s kindness the night before.
She needed coffee and another hot shower. Today, she’d take it easy and wash Chase out of her hair, so to speak. Tomorrow she’d start anew at Artemis and focus on all of the good stuff in her life.
Leaving her bedroom, she heard whispering coming from the kitchen. When she entered, J.T. and Caroline looked up. Both were still wearing their clothes from the night before. An empty bottle of wine and two glasses sat between them.
“Have you two been up all night?” she asked.
Caroline rose from her chair and hugged her, not saying anything. When Moira shifted her gaze to J.T., she caught him frowning. He’d said something last night about adding to Chase’s bad day. She wondered…no, Chase was no longer her concern.
“I’m making coffee,” she said after releasing Caroline. “Want some?”
J.T. nodded and rose. “I’m going to take a shower and change, if that’s okay. I need to leave soon as well, but I’ll take that coffee to go.”
She looked at the two of them. “You’re just going to leave too?” What was wrong with some men? Suddenly she wasn’t so sure about J.T.
“I’m going to give Chase a ride to D.C.,” J.T. told her somberly. “Evan and I have a plan. I can’t promise I’ll be able to change his mind on the personal front, but I’ll do my best. I can be pretty persuasive when I put my mind to it.”
Shocked, she watched him wink at her and then leave the kitchen.
“What in the hell?” she asked.
Caroline wrapped her arm around her waist and said, “Isn’t he wonderful?”
Moira planned to reserve judgment after her own experience with Chase.
Chapter 37
Chase was completely packed by the time Bonnie arrived. He could have had her stop coming after his casts were taken off, but since neither she nor Andy had raised the issue, he’d let it ride. He’d come to enjoy her company.
Today it ended.
And so did his time with Barney.
Cupping the tabby kitten in his lap, he closed his eyes and savored the soothing purr. He couldn’t believe he’d gotten so attached to this little fur ball, or that he felt emotional about leaving him behind. But he did. He was feeling emotional about everything, it seemed.
Especially Moira.
All night he’d lain in bed, his head pounding, his chest tight, wishing he’d handled things differently. Been calmer. More apologetic. Kissed her one last time.
Bonnie arrived on time, and Chase stood to greet her with Barney cradled in his arms. She looked at the suitcases by the door.
“You’re leaving,” she said simply. “I wondered if you’d jump the gun. You’re still not completely healed, but I imagine you know that.”
“The bones will heal the rest of the way, and so will my head at some point,” he said, although after yesterday, he feared the headaches were going to be stronger than ever. He’d been so hopeful the acupunct
ure and healing sessions would permanently banish them, but now he knew they were triggered by work.
“You heart may not heal if you leave now,” Bonnie said. “From the greenish cast of your face, I’d say things are finished with Moira?”
Bonnie had never minced words, but this time she’d managed to pull his chain. “That’s not your concern.”
She shook her head. “Despite how hardheaded you can be, I’ve come to like you, Chase Parker, so I’m going to tell you what I see. You have two roads ahead of you, the one you had and a new one of your own making. Do you really want to go back to your old life? How was it working for you? Were you happy? Because you were a bump on a log when I first set eyes on you, and in the past weeks, you’ve changed into a much happier, more enjoyable man.”
Something inside him was moved by the rightness of her words, but he couldn’t let it affect his decision. Quid-Atch’s interests were in trouble, and it was largely his fault. Maurie had made sure of that.
“This is vacation. It was a sojourn from reality,” he said, mimicking what he’d said to Moira.
“Reality is what you make it,” she said in a strong voice. “I had high hopes you had the courage to make yours into something new.”
For a time, he’d thought so too, but that was over now. “I have people who depend on me. Leaders don’t always have the freedom to do what they want. That’s something Evan doesn’t understand.” His boss and friend had the luxury of spending years, if needed, to turn a wild thought into reality. Not everyone could live that way. Nothing would get done.
“I think Evan has the right idea about life from what I can see,” she said, “and he certainly cares about you. Maybe he has more of the right answers than you think.”
For himself perhaps, but not for Chase and certainly not for Quid-Atch. Chase felt Barney paw at his stomach. “I’ve appreciated you letting me spend time with your cat.” He made himself walk over to her with Barney.