The Companions now turned their attention to their preparations. They decided to code name their operation ‘Expelliarmus’.
“Tracy,” said Lim, “I know you can create a portal right here, but can you create its pair in a different place?”
“I just did, in King’s Lynn.” Said a puzzled Tracy, waving her cellphone.
“No, other places too, outworld destinations. I have a plan that depends on it.”
“I can try,” she said, activating her cellphone and portal app.
“Jim. You made a silicene tent for our protection. Can you simulate other objects with that cloaking material? It occurs to me that silicene has the sheen of The Needful One’s silvery saucer portal. Hold your portal Tracy, we must try our modelling here, not in sight of the enemy.”
“Enemy”, said Jim, “that’s a word I prefer.” He cast a silver cloak that hovered and then another layering on top of the first. It looked like a saucer, but nothing like The Needful One’s device. Several tries produced better copies but of different sizes and shapes; “It’s a bit like blowing smoke rings,” said Jim, “blow a thousand before you get one the right shape.” He drew the cloaking failures back through a raised palm.
“Wait’” said Lim, “ most of your attempt produced silvery purses that were small. What we need to do is produce a sort of envelope inside the real saucer. An envelope that blocks access to the enemy portal and in which Tracy can build a new portal.”
“I don’t get it,” said Jim, “what’s the cunning plan?”
“I begin to see,” said Tracy, “the portal I make in the purse would be an opener, linked to a portal far away.”
“It is a long shot,” said Lim, “but The Needful One seems to be affected by both wind and gravity in his disembodied, gaseous state at least. If we can lure him into the saucer and into a portal created by Tracy, maybe we can send him somewhere extremely unpleasant. Maybe into a silicene container hiding a nuclear weapon or a wobbeliser.”
“Think big, why dontcha,” crowed Jim.
“Well, that is the current plan,” said Lim, “doing something is always better than doing nothing. While you guys practice, I am going to contact Louis to get the saucer prepared for moving from Cardington to Gannock terrace. And we’ll need some custom portals for that too, Tracy. I will also speak to Newton about the best destination for a tricked and entrapped enemy.”
“maybe there is a space big enough inside that huge head of his,” growled Jim, who habitually lowered his voice when speaking of Newton, “stick the enemy inside Newton’s bonce!”
“Jim, respect!” commanded Tracy. She spoke with a flash of her upturned hand like that of a dog trainer she had once seen on television. One Barbara Woodhouse, of “Training Dogs the Woodhouse Way”.
“Well, woof, woof,’ said Jim, mock panting with both ‘paws’ raised, “but there’s enough false gravitas in that Newtonic brain to hold a million stampeding elephants down.”
“The vanity of genius is a small price to pay for the rewards that come from it,” said Tracy, aiming for the Oxford Dictionary of Quotations.
Lim accessed his mental copy of the great dictionary, “Thomas More, the great English cleric said, “It is naturally given to all men to esteem their own inventions best”. I would emphasise the word ‘all’, he said, looking intently at Jim.
“All this mental Scrabble is fine,” said Jim, “but I have some silicene modelling to do. And you, Lim, have calls to make.”
Lim grinned, “when modelling, Jim, do not suppose you are a Michelangelo. A rough purse of the right size would do. And stop worrying about Newton’s vanity, just answer the question is he really worthy of his own estimation of himself. The world has already answered that.”
Jim blew a passable silicene donut shape towards Lim who let it settle harmlessly over his shoulders and slide down to his feet.
Tracy, working hard in the background, said, “Got it!”
“Got what?” queried Jim, “earache hearing about Newton?”
“No, I am pretty certain I can cast a distant portal onto or into any place I can imagine. We just need to devise a test.”
“simples,” said Jim, “stick a portal on the moon, send a nuke through to it and watch with an optical telescope for the big bang, simples.”
“You are a walking, talking act of contamination,” reprimanded Tracy.
“Look,” said Lim, I am going to talk to Louis and Newton. I suggest you have a word with Slovic and see if the professor can make you up some transmitter that you can send to the moon and interrogate with the current lunar orbiters. He’ll be fascinated by the chance to participate in Mankind’s interplanetary exchanges.”
“Except,” said Tracy, “it will be Womankind’s attempt and the moon is not another planet.”
Lim had already escaped.
In the next couple of hours, the plan was completed. Tracy’s test portal carried a transmitter to the moon’s surface where it sat and talked back through the lunar Orbiter Aldrin. The talk was just a simple coded beeping, but it worked fine. She then built a portal in the garden plot beside Lim’s dad’s allotment shed and a second portal in the Cardington hangar. She did this by the simple expedient of imagining the location and placing the portal in the imagined spot. In the case of the moon, she imagined the location of the first lunar landing and her portal opened beside the blasted landing stage of the American lunar module.
“Thank heaven for cellphone apps, GPS and Postal Codes and a good imagination,” she enthused. She reflected that she should have followed Jim’s example with some theatrical display and a shout of ‘Shazzam!’ She decided to give thought to a more appropriate introductory shout, maybe something in dog Latin that would gain approbation from the muggleworld. Her first thought was ‘Manifestat!’.
Jim meanwhile had created a fairly rigid silicene ‘purse’ of the right dimension for insertion into the still open mouth of The Needful One’s saucer. This was done with some ‘tailoring measurements’ provided by Louis staff at Cardington. It was designed to penetrate only a few feet so that it blocked but did not get affected by the saucer’s own portal. The staff at Cardington received the purse through Tracy’s new portal and installed it in the saucer. It was attached to the saucer ‘lips’ with some difficulty owing to the non-stick nature of the surface. Once it had been placed, Jim made it secure by expanding its dimensions just a fraction to jam it in location. He was amazed by the fine control he could now exercise over his silicene creations, even remotely.
Lim returned shortly after these preparations were complete.
“You know,” he said, “it felt very odd being separated from you two.” He knew that such honesty risked hugs from both Tracy and Jim and his fears were soon confirmed in a smothering double embrace. “Stop, it, per-lease. I need to tell you my news. Louis has confirmed that a portal has appeared in my father’s allotment, and Newton has chosen a location for a distant pair to the new saucer portal. He has suggested the centre of the planet Jupiter where the gravity is so intense that The Needful One could never dissociate into a gas. A second suggestion was the recently discovered Foramine Nigri, the black hole at the centre of our galaxy.”
“I can imagine diving through the swirl of Jupiter and penetrating to the core,” said Tracy, “but I have no idea what the Foramine Negri is. I have also discovered that the placing of a portal automatically returns displaced materials. We got a nice crop of carrots from the placing of the allotment portal and a cloud of moon dust from the moon portal. The Jupiter displacement material could be something intensely corrosive and under enormous pressure.”
“The Foramine Nigri is simply a black hole. Well, it’s simple to Newton. That displaced material, where does it appear?”
“I think it appears through the portal I pair with it. So if we want to link the new Cardington portal in the mouth of the saucer with one at the core of Jupiter, Cardington gets the blowback,” answered Tracy.
Lim was already on t
he phone to Newton. His face was glum when he finished, “Newton says that the temperature of Jupiter’s core is 10,000 Kelvin and the pressure is 200Gpa which is something like 29 million pounds per square inch. The blowback from establishing a portal there would be like a nuclear blast centred inside the saucer and blowing out into the Cardington hangar. That puts the kibosh on that plan.”
“Kibosh?” queried Jim.
“It means ‘puts an end to’ as in ‘put the mockers on’. It is 19th century English used by Dickens but of unknown origin.” Explained Lim.
“I forgot that you swallowed a dictionary, as well as a bible” said Jim, “and the complete works of Dickens, no doubt. Should make an English degree at Cambridge a complete doddle!”
“Now you are using a 1930’s term of unknown origin, ‘doddle’, meaning ‘easy task’,” said Lim, a note of apology creeping into his voice.
“When you boys have finished your lexical fencing, I may have discovered a solution to the portal problem.”
“Awesome! Isn’t she the dogs bollocks,” enthused Jim, risking a reproach from Tracy. Luckily for him she was too engaged in bringing her latest idea to fruition.”
“lexical means ‘of, or pertaining to, words’,” said Lim, “and ‘bollocks’ means, er, nonsense, as well as the obvious 18th century term related to the Germanic for ‘ball’.”
“Shut up,” grated Tracy, “Give me strength. Do you want to hear my solution?”
“I do,” said Jim, essaying an angelic look.
“Me too,” said Lim, blushing.
“Well it isn’t easy. But if I fix a portal as the pair to the saucer, I will have to create a separate portal pair somewhere where they will be relatively harmless and then move them afterwards. So I create a portal, say, at the bottom of an ocean and a second at Jupiter’s core. The blowback then occurs under deep water and high pressure and when it dissipates, I move the portal back to the saucer at Cardington.”
“Which already has a portal jammed in its gob!” said Jim in exasperation. He could see a shed load of work coming. Well a few minutes of work, anyway.
Well unjam it,” said Tracy.
Lim checked with Newton, “The Professor says the pressure at the bottom of the deepest ocean is only 16,000 pounds per square inch and completely unable to blanket the release of Jupiter core pressure of 29 million ponds per square inch. The effect would be to detonate a nuclear explosion big enough to empty the ocean of water and blanket the entire world in steam...”
“Not to mention flying fish, flying whales, fling megasquid....” said Jim, gloomily. Then he brightened. “So it has to be done in space, where no one could hear the pressure scream,” he crowed.
Lim and Tracy looked at Jim and were thinking hard.
“Whassup,” said Jim, miserably.
“We’re thinking about your idea. I have to make another call to Newton.”
“Ask how far away we would have to place the portal that vents Jupiter core.” Said Tracy.
“I’m ahead of you,” said Lim.
A short debate ensued.
“he sin’t sure,” said Lim. But the portal has to be created in space in a position where it can be reached and physically recovered. And we have no assets up there apart from the ISS and Moonbase Alpha. The latter is not for consideration because the blast would destroy much of the Moon’s surface and might even affect its orbit. Newton hasn’t finished working out the consequences. He asked if you are able to place a portal and orient its opening, Tracy.”
“In other words if I can place the portal in near space and orient the opening to spew Jupiter core towards deep space.”
“And what about Newton’s third law,” said a suddenly serious Jim, “wouldn’t the reaction propel the portal towards the planet?”
“I don’t think so,” said Tracy, “portals do not have mass, as such and if I create a portal in a closed and locked state the Jupiter spew cannot throw back through the portal. I think we are ok.”
“So,” said Lim, “where’s the best place to position a portal so that it can be recovered?
“I suggest that we put it in a geostationary orbit and create the Jupiter spew when the ISS is on the far side of Rowling and shielded by the planet. We’ll also need a window that excludes the moon from the portal’s sights and probably the sun too. Heck, this is a Newton-NASA thing. It makes my brain ache.” Tracy held a hand to her forehead.
“OK,” said Lim, “they can handle that, but once the portal pair are established, one at the heart of Jupiter and one in space, how do we recover the nearest portal so that it can be installed in the saucer? And how do we tempt The Needful One to re-enter his Space-Time vehicle.”
A conference call with Louis and Newton ensued. It was soon established that the British Skylon vehicle was more advanced than anyone knew and could establish a geostationary orbit and had a payload bay capacity that could be sufficient. Tracy organised a trial to prove that a portal could be physically moved, though, at Newton’s suggestion, it needed a magnetic collar such as could easily be provided by Professor Slovic. Tracy also discovered that the orientation of a portal, necessary to directing blast away from Rowling world could be determined in her cellphone app, though she had difficulty understanding the spatial co-ordinates describing orientation. This was a critical stumbling block and left Tracy facing an hour of instruction from the imperious and impatient Newton who complained to Lim:
“You expect me to teach astrophysics to a neanderthal still hopping about using its knuckles?”
Tracy cut the communication instantly and insisted that she would only discuss the matter with Professor Slovic and on-site academics. She enabled them to look at the app, construct a portal and orient it, testing the outflush with a military flash-bang thrown through from the Oakridge base portal. They then had to relate this to spatial co-ordinates and test them by creating an orbiting portal and passing a magnesium flare through it and away from Rowling world. This work took some hours, but a geostationary orbital portal was finally created and linked to a portal built into the silicene purse open mouth of The Needful One’s saucer. Tracy also ascertained that it was possible to move one portal through another. All was set.
Meantime, The Needful One had not been idle. Cheated of Lim’s father as a hostage, he had raised an army of local disciples who roamed King’s Lynn, seeking out opposition, which mainly came from the churches and from mosque and gujarat house temples. Thugs empowered with a crude understanding of the intentions of their leader, the ‘disciples’, enjoyed obtaining a mockery of obedience thanks to the threat of, or actual acts of, torture. Families and children were not excepted from this barbarism and the clock was ticking towards the total destruction of the Companion’s home town. Louis had mounted a rescue of Jim and Tracy’s families, even snatching siblings from schools and colleges minutes ahead of ‘The Disciples’. He was using his limited facilities to ensure that the Companions of the Order of the Spectacles remained as free from worry and as focussed as was possible.
Louis sounded breathless on Lim’s phone, “How are things progressing,” he gasped, “I don’t want to pressure you, but King’s Lynn is facing riots and destruction.”
“We are just about ready,” answered Lim, “Jim has tailored his purse into the mouth of the saucer at Cardington and Tracy has established an outgoing only portal inside. She has also set up an orbiting portal and a portal deep in the core of Jupiter – or so we think. We are going to test the Jupiter portal using the orbiting portal. If it spews out core material at 29 million psi, we will know the Jupiter portal is well sited.
“Don’t do it,” said Louis, “The Needful One is well aware of big global events and he could scarcely miss a gigantic flare in space that will turn night into day.”
“But what if our calculations are wrong? Sorry, what if Professor Slovic’s calculations are wrong?”
“Newton has checked them, even though you guys are no longer on speaking terms with him over some imagin
ed slight.” Said Louis, unwisely losing the regard of a listening Tracy.
“A slight? He did not want to communicate with a knuckle-dragging neanderthal. That’s me apparently!” said Tracy.
“Well, he and Slovic are agreed. There is no need to use the geostationary portal. Link the saucer portal to the Jupiter portal alone.” Louis words sounded like an instruction, “I have moved a small surprise into your father’s allotment shed and as soon as the saucer is transferred here fro Cardington, I shall spring it on The Needful One. You guys use your prayers to guide The Quintessence to cause The Needful One to flee to the imagined safety of his saucer.”
“We are coming to Lynn now,” said Lim.
“Not wise,” said Louis, “although it might help with my little diversion. If you show that you are prepared to be vaporised by my suitcase bomb just to get The Needful One, it might work.”
Muggles Bereaved Page 24