by T. S. Joyce
Just the mention of his name sent a trill of anticipation down her spine. Her stomach clenched and warmth spread through her middle as she imagined, for the tenth time today, his flexed body as he had washed his face last night.
The door to Daria’s house was open and the fragrant smell of herbs and spices and dried lavender filled the air. The windows were open, filling the large front room with natural light and everywhere, plants in different stages of drying hung from the low rafters. She ducked under and upside down bushel of blood flowers.
“Hello?” she called out.
“In here,” came Daria’s reply.
Anya made her way to a dining area, or what would’ve been a dining area if the table hadn’t been made into a sterile surface to receive patients.
“You must be the Long Claw transplant,” an older woman with gray streaked hair pulled back into a ponytail said.
Her smile was friendly and Anya relaxed. “I am, only arrived last night. I wondered if I could ask you some questions that I was unable to ask my healer back home.”
“Sure, dear. Have a seat.”
Settled across from the healer, she fidgeted, unsure of where to start. Best to just say it. “I haven’t had a heat in over eighteen months. I was wondering if that meant my child bearing years are finished.”
Daria looked surprised, then patted her hand, which rested clenched on her knee. “Without a proper examination I’ll only be guessing, but I’ve seen this before. You were mated to Nathan, yes?”
Mated to him? The term sounded more and more wrong, especially with everything she was learning in Bear Valley. Manipulated or misused sounded more like it. “I don’t know,” she said honestly. “I thought I was.”
“And you weren’t the only female he had, correct?”
A nod was all Anya could muster.
Daria leaned forward, eyes serious. “Did he make you happy?”
This was the question she hadn’t planned on. Happy? She didn’t even know what that was anymore. But if she admitted the truth, out loud, she’d never be able to go back to the way she was. Her admission would change something fundamental about her, and she wouldn’t be able to go back to living under Nathan’s thumb. If she admitted how unhappy she’d really been, her fractured world would crumble to dust and ash around her.
“Anya?” Daria said, coercing the dreaded words from her throat.
“No. I wasn’t happy.” Even to herself, her voice sounded weak and strangled.
The healer didn’t look surprised, only sad and sympathetic. “You have to consider the possibility that you haven’t been in heat because your body isn’t in a good place to have a cub with that man. It’s a mental thing, Anya. Your body was telling you something, you just didn’t know how to interpret it. I can do an examination on you and have a better idea of what’s going on, but I’m fairly certain that is your answer. I’ve seen it three times before this, and every one was caused by stress and unhappiness, or some kind of emotional struggle. It’ll come back when you relax and get to a better place.”
Anya’s ragged voice dipped to a whisper. “So you think I can still have cubs?”
“You’re young and smell healthy. Time will tell, but yes, I think someday, when you are in a more relaxed atmosphere, your body will start working the way it’s supposed to again.”
Daria had given her a lot to think about. She did want children someday, but if she went back to the Long Claws, would she ever be relaxed enough to resume her regular courses? There was so much pressure. If she didn’t, Nathan would find a way to banish her, even if she did succeed in gaining information on Bear Valley for him. And every minute she was here, she wanted to return to her old life less and less.
The brown paper wrapped parcel with all of the herbs she needed for the balm crinkled in her hand as she stepped outside and greeted Hannah and Jo.
“Are you okay?” Jo asked.
“I think so.” Kind of.
The others chattered happily on as they hiked through a narrow trail in the woods. She thought they’d take her to Chase’s house, so she was surprised when the trail dumped them into a clearing with what appeared to be a fighting arena instead. Her gaze found Chase immediately.
His baseball cap was turned backward and his tight gray shirt accentuated every movement, every ripple of muscle. He was yelling at a couple of brown bears who were fighting in the center, and they halted what they were doing at his command. He held a clipboard in one hand, and with the other, mimed encircling the other bear. His face was serious, focused, and she was struck by how attractive his profile was.
Of course he was a battle trainer. The silvered scars on his torso made perfect sense now. No wonder he was one of the ones in the woods fighting Nathan’s soldiers when Riker had gone after Hannah. And he wasn’t just a fight trainer, but the trainer, from what it looked like.
A dozen or so shifters in human form stood in a half circle around the grizzlies, listening carefully to Chase’s instructions.
“Okay,” he called. “Try it again, but this time, protect your necks.” His eyes slid to her, then away, then back as they widened in surprise. He said something low to the man beside him, then jogged toward the fence line.
“Hey,” she greeted him, flustered and unbalanced.
“You should come in here and take this lesson. You have to be here with me anyway, and it’ll be over in half an hour.”
Her mouth dropped open and she looked at Hannah and Jo to see if they’d heard him too. “You want me to fight?” Nathan never would’ve approved this. What if her skin was marred?
“Yeah. You need to get stronger. You’re a bear, Anya, not a sloth. Take off your clothes. You’re up next.”
“Take off my…Chase, I don’t know about this.”
“You want to be pampered all your life, Anya?”
She definitely did not want that. “No.”
“Then let me teach you to be strong.” A helpless noise left her throat. No sexier words had ever been uttered to her before now.
“Jo,” he called over his shoulder as he sauntered back to the fight. “You too. She’s an Andean so you’ll be similar in weight.”
“Wait, did you change together?” Hannah asked. “How does he already know what kind of bear you are?”
“He asked.”
“Nosy man,” Jo accused as she peeled her shirt off and climbed the fence. She unzipped her shorts and cast Anya a mischievous grin. “He’s going to freak out when he sees your bear.”
Great, like she needed the reminder. Everyone would stare at her and she’d be embarrassed, and she’d be lucky if her pansy bear didn’t go hide under a log.
****
The woman was slowly undoing Chase and he needed to rein it in—quick. It didn’t help that she stared at him as much as he wanted to look at her, with her big, soft brown doe eyes and lips too sensual for her own damned good.
He couldn’t read her. Submissive, definitely. She wouldn’t even be able to hold middle of the clan if Nathan hadn’t chosen her. Usually he took dominant women to bed with him, but he housed what seemed like a constant erection around Anya. Even submissive though, she had a smart mouth that confused and intrigued him. He liked her sassy, and the day had done her good. She wasn’t avoiding his gaze or hunching her shoulders like she had last night. Now she had straightened her spine and spoke more clearly. The change in her made a sliver of pride surge through him and he tried to stomp it down.
He wasn’t going to do this again. He’d learned his lesson the first time and he’d be damned if he put his heart in the path of a woman again.
But…
Anya was needy, and caring and she always smelled aroused, like she wanted him to take her across the nearest table all the damned time. Her smell was probably what was driving him slowly to insanity.
Jake and Tessa had separated, exhausted from three fights in a row, and he waved them off. They had done well enough for today. He jotted Anya’s name onto the list and
made notes on who would be best to pair her up with until she was strong enough to take a bigger bear. He would list all of her struggles on here, then come up with a plan to work on them.
Did he think she was a spy still? Maybe. He didn’t know anymore. He certainly wasn’t as confident as he’d been yesterday, and he couldn’t just go treating her like a pariah her entire probation. Her little fists-of-fury show last night had been pitiful. It wasn’t just acting either. She was really trying to hurt him with punches that felt like cotton ball blasts, and that shit wouldn’t fly in the upcoming war. She’d be killed for sure.
The thought made him swallow hard, once. Twice. The vision of her laying on a blood soaked battlefield elicited a growl from his chest.
Fucking Nathan for claiming her.
Fucking Nathan for letting her go.
“Today we have someone new joining us,” he called out to the class, who were waiting for him to instruct the next lesson. “She is is a transfer from the Long Claws and holy shit…”
Joanna he recognized immediately, but the bear beside her had his mouth hanging open. Pitch black fur covered her body, but her face looked like it had been dipped in milk. Perfectly white fur covered her face and trailed down her neck. Her chest was the same creamy color and her eyes were a clear sky blue.
“Dude,” Wayne drawled from beside him. “What is she?”
“Andean. Get back in line,” Chase said without looking at him. When the shifter didn’t move, he shoved his head and Wayne stumbled back to stand beside the others.
His trainees were whispering amongst themselves, and he shot them a shut-the-hell-up glare. Their response of silence was immediate. Smart bears.
Anya paused and looked warily from side to side, and Joanna grunted in question beside her. She was uncomfortable, maybe because of all the people she didn’t know watching her, so he said, “Jake and Tessa take a break. The rest of you, ten laps around the arena. When you’re done, you’re free to go.”
Their strides made sloshing sounds against the drying mud and Anya seemed to settle, if only a little.
Trying to regain his composure, he cleared his throat. “You’re going to face off here. Up on hind legs, let’s go.”
Jo stood steadily, already well-practiced at this drill.
Anya stood and lost her balance, then stood again. Lurching forward, she landed on all fours and tried again.
“Jesus, you can’t even balance on your hind legs? You haven’t spent enough time as a bear then. Again. Keep trying until you’re steady.”
She looked frustrated but it had to be learned. And he had to teach it. Any balance issues had to be hammered out before she took a swing, or she’d just fall back and expose her vitals.
On the eleventh try, she curled her lips back from gleaming white teeth at him, but held her position.
“Good. Now, Jo, slap her.” A grunt came from Jo as she looked at him in confusion, but he crossed his arms and ordered, “Now.”
Drawing up, Jo swiped the pad of her giant paw pathetically across Anya’s shoulder. Anya fell over. He rubbed his face and hoped it would help keep his building headache at bay.
“I like a good lady bear fight as much as the next dude, but this has my dick limper than a wet noodle. Slap her hard, or I’m going to change and Anya will be learning to fight a grizzly.” His voice cracked across the clearing with the order. It had been a long day and his patience was as thin as rice paper right now. “Hurt. Her.”
Chapter Six
Hurt her? Chase was serious. Anya’s first lesson was getting her ass kicked by Joanna?
The clawed slap that Jo laid on her shoulder echoed and sent her sprawling.
“Good. Again,” Chase said.
What? Anya shook her head, trying to clear it and stood on her hind legs again. Her balance was off, so she bucked forward against Jo. Lurching backward, the scruff of her neck burned as Chase yanked her away from Jo. She wanted to bite him to punish his roughness, considered it even, but Jo hit her again and she flew back onto the muddy ground.
Asshole. Chase was a mega-asshole. If this was how he was teaching his bears, they were all doomed in a fight with the Long Claws anyway. Maybe she should tell him that—rub it in his sneering face.
Chase’s lips turned up in a humorless, hard smile. “That a girl, Anya. Get angry. You should be, because Joanna’s about to hit you again.”
And Joanna did, but it was too much to just sit there and take it anymore. Anya lunged and tackled Jo, who seemed surprised, because she fell backward and landed hard in the mud. Slapping and clawing, Anya was pushed off of Jo by the black bear’s hind legs, and she circled her slowly.
“Acceptable,” Chase barked out. “Now line up again.”
Blood and anger pounded through her veins and she didn’t want to do what Chase commanded. She wanted to defy him as his punishment for letting her get hit. Jo stood up and Anya followed, her legs more steady this time.
“Jo, hit her again.”
It was too much to ask her to be still for that kind of abuse and she charged, hitting Jo around her middle. This time, they didn’t separate. Everything was red fury and lightning against the backs of her eyes, and she wanted to kill everything. Jo was vicious with her claws but Anya wouldn’t let go. Maybe they were locked up like that for seconds, maybe hours, she didn’t know. All she knew was that no one was going to hurt her unchallenged again.
“Heyayayay!” A voice came through her clouded mind, stretching for her logic through the heavy tendrils of crimson fog.
A hand grabbed the scruff of her neck and she turned, lashing out. Chase’s eyes were hard, and she tried to pull her claws back but the momentum was already too great. He knew the slap was coming. She could see it in the grim set to his mouth, but before her six-inch weapons touched him, he exploded into a red-furred grizzly bear twice her size.
As her claws raked across his chest, he roared so loud the sound rattled her bones. The man was all teeth and claws and battle scars and for a split second, she saw her short life flash before her eyes. And sadly, most of it was kind of depressing.
She sank down onto her back and offered him her neck in a last ditch effort to save her own hide. The ground shook as he lowered down onto all four paws, then he wrapped his giant canine teeth around her throat.
She was scared, really scared, but there was something intimate about his mouth on her, and she reached up and rested her paw on his chest, just to feel his pounding heart. His expression changed, softened, and he released her. Pressing his giant nose against the fur of her neck, he inhaled deeply and wrapped his arm around her, drawing her closer to his body. Her breath came in short bursts. She wanted him. Bear or human, she wanted this man.
“Chase!” a man yelled from the fence. Riker.
His eyes dropped to his paw, now cradling her and such a look of utter confusion passed over his features. He shrank back and in a moment was human once again. And gloriously naked.
Everything about him was huge and he didn’t even try to hide his erection from the people gathering around the edge of the arena. Confident man indeed.
“Change back, now!” he yelled. Whoa, he sounded pissed.
Closing her eyes against his angry glare, she melted back into her human skin and stood with as much dignity as she could muster while naked, covered in mud and reeking of pheromones. Oh horny inner bear. What have you done?
She cupped her sex to hide at least some of her, but his eyes stayed on her breasts. Ah, a boob man. No, not on her breasts, but above them.
“You lied to me.” His voice came out steely and dangerous.
She pursed her lips and shook her head slow. “I don’t know what you mean.” Could his bear read minds? Could he tell she was a traitor just from the smell of her fur?
“You aren’t mated to Nathan, alpha of the Long Claws. You aren’t mated to anyone.”
She frowned and opened her mouth but nothing came out. Canting her head, she said, “I’m sorry, what do
you mean?”
Chase yanked her arm forward so fast she inhaled a sharp breath. “I mean, you aren’t marked, Anya. You aren’t claimed by Nathan. You’re just thoroughly fucked by him.”
“How dare you.” Narrowing her eyes, she tried to pull away from him but his hand stayed firm. “You know nothing about what we are.” Shit. “What we were. I was so claimed by him.”
“Jo, were other people in the Long Claws marked like you are now?” he asked over her shoulder.
Anya twisted in his grasp and Jo stood naked as the day she was born, sporting a red, three cut scar under her collar bone and biting at her thumbnail.
“A few,” she answered.
“So the Long Claws know of the claiming ritual?”
“Yep,” Jo said.
He turned his furious glare back on Anya. “Yet Nathan didn’t claim you. Do any of the others bear his mark?”
Anya stared at him, mortified as what he was saying sank in. Of course April and Greta didn’t bear Nathan’s mark either. He wouldn’t be able to switch them out as he pleased if he had committed to them like that. His clan would see it as a failure. She felt sick and duped and so stupid. “No.”
“Was there even a ceremony, Anya?”
She squeezed her eyes closed and dropped her gaze to his bare feet. “No.” Her voice came out small and defeated. Pathetic.
He released her and strode off. “What else have you lied about?” he muttered over his shoulder. His eyes blazed an inhuman color as he threw her one final furious look.
“Wait, why do you care?” She jogged in an effort to catch up. “Why are you mad at me now? What have I done wrong?”
“Why do you think?”
“I don’t know what to think!”
She clamped her hand around his wrist and he yanked away from her. “Don’t touch me.”
“So, I don’t have a mate. I didn’t know that, and I didn’t know I was lying. It wasn’t a lie to me. I’ve been with him for two years. What are you so pissed about? I didn’t hurt you. Things are different there than here, and you’ve acted like I wounded you. This has nothing to do with you!”