First Love

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First Love Page 21

by Harte, C. J.


  “But classes don’t start for another ten days.”

  “Jordan, our classes start on the third.”

  “I forgot.” Jordan wasn’t able to hide her disappointment. “I’ve just enjoyed the time without either one of us having to study or go to class. My parents do want me and my brother at some New Year’s Eve event. I’m going to miss you.”

  Mark stood. “I’ll go get packing. Give me a hug. I’ll see you when you get back.”

  When they were alone, Jordan began to pace. She finally stopped in front of Drew. “Last week, I was talking to my mother and I told her I may not want to get married. She said I hadn’t found the right boy. Drew, I’m scared. What if my parents can’t accept who I am?”

  Drew reached for Jordan’s hand. “I’m sure your parents love you and want you to be happy. It may take them a little longer to become accepting, but don’t give up on them.” Drew had her own doubts about how well the Thompsons would deal with Jordan being gay. She stopped. Did Jordan think of herself as gay? “Jordan, I know we’ve talked about this before, but, how do you describe our relationship?”

  “You’re my best friend and my lover. I love you. You know that.”

  “I know, but do you recognize that this is a lesbian relationship?”

  Jordan pulled away. Her tone of voice was sharp. “Of course I know what it’s called. I just wonder why people have to label things. Why can’t they just see how much I love you?”

  “For the same reason Brandan became unglued with the play, with me, and with Mark. Enough of those people elected your father to his current office, and I’m sure he knows it.” Drew could see how upset Jordan was becoming. “Come here and let me hold you.” She waited for Jordan to sit down. “Sometimes it’s easier to label or categorize. Your parents are probably following the same path as their parents. After all, your folks are about ten years older than my parents. Give them time. It’ll work out.” I hope. “If not, you’re part of my family.”

  Chapter Twenty-five

  Jordan rode back to the White House with her brother and Sandra. Conversation was relaxed with all three complaining about having to be on their best behavior for the entire evening. Jordan laughed. She couldn’t imagine her brother doing anything to get in trouble. When they were younger, she was generally the instigator of childish pranks. They were both too reserved to ever get into any serious trouble, but she occasionally found herself being reminded to behave. She had always complied, until now.

  Not long after arriving, Jordan was greeted by her mother. “Jordan, why didn’t you come back sooner? Your dad and I were hoping you could join us for dinner. The Carters have been here the last two nights, and young Brandan seemed quite distressed you weren’t here.”

  “Mom, I was spending time with my friends.”

  “That’s nice, but what about your family?”

  “I had lunch with Sandra and Jack today.”

  “Dear, we don’t see that much of you, and you’ve been gone all week. And you know your dad is campaigning. You know how important it is to have the family together for these events.”

  “Yes, ma’am. I’m sorry. I just forgot about the time.” Jordan wanted to ask why Jack and Sandra were not being asked to be at all these events. She knew the answer. They were engaged and spending time with her family. That was okay. She was just spending time with her friends. That wasn’t okay. What could she say that would make a difference?

  “Have you decided what you’re going to wear tonight? I’ve got the hair people coming around four.”

  “No, ma’am. Whatever.”

  “Jordan Thompson, what’s gotten in to you?”

  She tried to feign more interest. “I’ll go find something. Who am I sitting with?”

  “We have you at the Carter’s table and Jack and Sandra at General Schrader’s table.”

  She gritted her teeth and tried to keep a calm tone to her voice. “Is his son going to be here tonight?”

  “Why, yes, he is? Would you like to sit at their table?”

  “Please. I think I’d have a much more enjoyable evening.” She needed to defuse Brandan’s attention. “Mom, I would prefer not being around Brandan Carter. I know the Carters are friends, but I don’t like Brandan much.” She told her mother about the couple of times her security had to intervene, carefully editing her story.

  “Jordan, I’m surprised. Why didn’t your security inform us? That’s unacceptable.”

  “I asked them to not say anything. I know how close you and Dad are with the Carters.”

  “That doesn’t matter. Your safety is more important to us. Your team must let us know if there is any threat.”

  “I didn’t want to worry you. There wasn’t any physical danger.”

  “Jordan, it doesn’t matter. Especially with the recent threats we have been getting.”

  Jordan turned away. She couldn’t look her mother in the eyes. “I promise I’m safe. I’m sure Brandan was just having a bad day.”

  “Don’t worry. I’ll have the table settings changed. Captain Schrader seems like a nice young man. In the future, please let your father and me know of any future unsafe situations. Understand? We don’t care who or what the situation.”

  Jordan nodded. She had no false notions that Brandan would leave her alone, but at least she had an escort for the evening that she would enjoy being around. And Brandan couldn’t very well argue with the son of a three-star general.

  *

  Dinner was nearly over before Brandan Carter approached her table. “Jordan, I need to speak to you.”

  Jordan remained seated. “Of course.” She had no intention of being alone with Brandan.

  “Privately.”

  “I’m sorry, but the music just started and Ms. Thompson promised to dance with me this evening.”

  Jordan gave Rob a thankful smile.

  “I didn’t like his tone of voice. Is he always so commanding?” Rob asked when they stepped away.

  She didn’t want to get involved in personal politics, but she appreciated Rob’s perception of the situation. “He can be, especially if he thinks things aren’t going exactly as he planned.”

  “Uh-oh. He’s headed this way. Let’s go chat with your parents, and I’ll escort you back to your quarters.”

  Jordan gratefully took his arm and allowed him to escort her gracefully away from Brandan. When they arrived in the personal quarters, Jordan asked him if he wanted to stay and talk.

  “To you, always. How’s school? You must be doing well because I haven’t had any calls.”

  “If I keep this up, I’ll graduate with honors and could even graduate with high honors. I’ve really pulled up my grade point average. I’ve had this wonderful tutor who’s my best friend.” Jordan talked about school and her classes. She couldn’t say enough good things about Drew and how much she helped her.

  “She sounds like a very special person.”

  “She is. Very special.”

  “Great. I’m happy for you. Now let me get back to my parents and you get some rest. If you need someone to run interference, call me. I’m on leave until January fifth.” He kissed her cheek and left.

  Jordan stared at him. She remembered her conversation with him when she was beginning her sophomore year. She also recalled the big smile he wore when he said he was happy for her. He’s gay. Rob is gay! She was sure of it. Why hadn’t she noticed before? Drew was right. There are gay people around and she never noticed before.

  *

  Jordan called Rob the next day and asked if he wanted to come to the White House to watch football. He offered to pick her up and take her to the base where they could watch the games at the Officer’s Club. She readily accepted. It was one of the few places her parents knew she would be safe.

  They spent the next couple of days together driving around, going to museums, or having long walks and chats on the base. The day before Rob was scheduled to leave, Jordan had worked up her courage to ask.

  �
�Can I ask you a very personal question?” They had been walking along the Potomac.

  Rob stopped and carefully examined her face. Jordan wondered if he was trying to figure out how to answer.

  “Yes, I am.”

  “How did you know what I wanted to ask?”

  “I’ve sensed you figured it out New Year’s Eve and have been building up your courage.”

  “You don’t look gay.”

  Rob roared with laughter. “I’m not sure what to say. Neither do you. Neither do most people who are gay.”

  “Does your father know?”

  “Yes.”

  “How did he handle it?”

  “Not well at first. My dad was angry and hurt. He said some things he later apologized for. Once he realized I wasn’t going to change, he came around to accepting the idea. Especially when I told him I plan to be the third generation of Schraders wearing a gold star. How are your parents dealing with this?”

  “My…my parents?”

  “I’m sorry. I thought…. Never mind. You’ll find the right time.”

  Jordan shook her head. She was sure Rob was opening a door for her to talk. “Why do you think I’m gay?”

  “I’ve had too many attractive young women flirt with me. You’ve been a great friend but never once seemed romantically interested. It was when you were talking about Drew, however, that I thought you were in love with her. I’m sorry if I was making too many assumptions.”

  She touched his arm. “No, you’re right.”

  “I’ll make one more then. I assume it’s mutual.”

  Jordan couldn’t keep the smile from spreading across her face. “It is. She is so amazing. I feel safe with her and alive.”

  “Okay, one more assumption. You haven’t talked to your parents.”

  “No. Her parents are different from mine. I’ve met them and they made me feel welcome. Even though they can’t stand my father. Now…now my folks have made it clear they expect me to be on my best behavior and be part of my father’s campaign. Then there’s Brandan….”

  “It’ll work out.” He pulled a card out of his wallet. “If you ever want to talk, here’s my e-mail and phone number.”

  Jordan was hopeful. She now had another gay friend. One that her family knew well even if they didn’t know he was gay.

  Chapter Twenty-six

  January was flying by. Jordan was well aware that Drew would be gone the month of February. She wasn’t getting nearly enough time with her. Between her classes and Drew’s schedule, they generally only spent two to three nights together. They both were so tired that sex had become infrequent. Jordan was determined to steal Drew away for a weekend. The next to the last weekend of the month, she talked Drew and Mark into coming and staying with her for the entire weekend.

  The night before Drew was to fly to Cheyenne, they went to bed at five in the afternoon. Drew was surprised at the intensity of their lovemaking. Jordan was passionate and creative. And demanding. Drew was amazed at the change, and pleased. By the next morning, she was physically exhausted but she knew she could sleep most of the trip. She held Jordan and watched her doze. She couldn’t believe how beautiful Jordan was. How did I get so lucky?

  As if reading her mind, Jordan opened her eyes. “I love you.” Her smile had the deep dimples, the smile of real happiness.

  “I know. I love you, Jordan. I’m going to miss you, but the month of February will be over, and then I’ll be back. Mark will be back a couple of days before I am, then you’ll know I’ll be back.”

  *

  February

  Jordan was miserable. She missed Drew, and Mark was in Tampa. She went to dinner at her sorority house, but even that had lost its appeal. She didn’t want to talk about boyfriends or engagement parties or the next social event.

  A week before her birthday, her parents announced that they were coming to Gainesville for her twenty-first birthday. Jordan was pleased with the distraction until her parents announced they were throwing a dinner party for her.

  “Mom, can’t we just have dinner together?”

  “Darling, your father needs to shake a few hands, and there are many of our friends who would be hurt if we didn’t invite them. Besides, Florida is a key state in this election.”

  Political friends with money in an electorally important state. At least it was a distraction.

  Her parents had arranged for the ballroom at the Hilton. Jordan dressed but was resentful. This was her birthday! She missed Drew. Each day that passed reinforced her determination to make a life with her. She had even enrolled for the maximum credit hours this semester. She wanted to finish as soon as she could. She struggled with believing in herself. She only had to think of Drew and she felt stronger. Drew was so much a part of her new confidence; she would do anything to hold on to it.

  *

  The entire evening was orchestrated by her parents’ staff, even down to the time the cake would be brought in. Jack and Sandra made the evening tolerable and served as a buffer whenever Brandan was around. She couldn’t believe how many times she had to find an excuse to avoid his company. She wanted to leave but knew the birthday cake would not be brought in until ten. Another hour. Jordan wasn’t sure how she could stand much more of this evening. She was definitely changing.

  Finally, the cake was brought out and the crowd gathered around to sing “Happy Birthday” to her. Somehow, Brandan managed to be next to her when the birthday pictures were taken. She smiled and cut the first slice. She handed it to her father. She turned to cut another slice and found Brandan Carter down on one knee holding out a large, and probably very expensive, diamond ring.

  “Jordan Thompson, this is my birthday present to you. Will you marry me?”

  Cameras flashing, people clapping, all the surrounding sound went unnoticed. Jordan stood there stunned, wanting to shout “no,” and struggling with her family’s expectations for polite behavior. It was only when her mother came up next to her that she realized she hadn’t given an answer and there was an unusual silence in the room.

  “Brandan, what a surprise. I’m sure Jordan is speechless from being overwhelmed with emotion.” Her mother pulled Brandan next to her and allowed pictures of the three of them to be taken before she was able to pull her father into the picture.

  She turned to Jordan. “Young lady, there will be no weddings in the White House until you’ve finished school. Do you understand?”

  Jordan understood perfectly. Her mother had kept her from embarrassing herself and the family. “Thank you,” she whispered to her mother.

  “We’ll talk later,” her mother whispered back.

  No matter what happened from here on, Jordan had a glimmer of hope that things would eventually work out.

  *

  Drew was having dinner with her parents when Mark called. “Hey, what’s up? How’s Tampa General?”

  “Have you seen the news?”

  “No. What’s the matter? Are you okay? The news won’t be on for another hour.”

  “Go turn on CNN or MSNBC.”

  Drew went into the living room and turned on the television. The breaking news was the engagement of Jordan Thompson to Brandan Carter, two well-known political families. Already, comparisons to the Julie Nixon-David Eisenhower romance and marriage were being made.

  “I’ll kill them all,” her father said.

  “Sweetie, I’m so sorry. What happened?”

  Drew watched the screen. She saw Brandan down on one knee and she saw the look on Jordan’s face. “Nothing’s happened. If you look carefully, she didn’t answer him. She’s also not smiling. Dad, trust me, Jordan was completely unaware. Look at the expression on her face. She’s horrified. Brandan’s just crass enough to do something like this in a public forum. He knows he’ll get publicity and he doubts Jordan will make a scene.”

  She remembered Mark was still on the phone. She chatted with him briefly and then returned to the dinner table. Drew looked around the table at the questioning f
aces. She was ninety-five percent sure of Jordan’s love, but that five percent was driving her crazy.

  “Jordan can’t stand Brandan.”

  “Then she’s in good company because I don’t care for his father, either,” her father said.

  “I don’t understand,” Megan said. “If she doesn’t like him, why is he asking her to marry him?”

  “It’s a long story. Bottom line is that, from what Jordan says, he doesn’t believe anyone can say no to him. He doesn’t love her, just her father’s title.”

  “How awful it must be for her.” Her mother reached for Drew’s hand. “Is there anything we can do?”

  “I guess we just have to have faith this will work out. I’ll talk to Jordan later tonight. Thanks for being you. All of you.”

  *

  It was nearly midnight when Drew was finally able to talk to Jordan. “I’ve been calling for the last two hours. Are you okay?”

  “We didn’t get home until after midnight here and then I’ve been talking to my mom. She knows how I feel about Brandan. She says she’ll talk to my dad but that she needs some time to figure out the best time and how to handle it. I don’t know what to do. I’m not going to spend time around him. I won’t.”

  “Hold on, Jordan. Calm down.”

  “Calm down! It’s not your life that has been splashed all over the news. You’re not the one having to deal with this problem. Now the whole world thinks I’m engaged to someone I can’t stand.”

  “I think you’re exaggerating a little. The whole world doesn’t know.”

  “You’re right. Some of them are asleep now. They won’t know until they wake up.”

  Drew was irritated. It seemed as if Jordan wanted to start a fight. “Look. I’m not the enemy.”

  “Right, and now I have to figure out how to explain that I’m engaged to Brandan and, oh, by the way, I have a female lover.”

 

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