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Untamed Wolf

Page 55

by Wade, Cara


  ***

  Hex

  My heart was racing as I finally got Kayla back into her hotel room where she belonged. This was crazy, and all the fault of Mouse. He should have told her. It should not have been left to me, but I felt glad that at least I'd said something.

  I carried her over to her bed and watched her flop on the sheets, looking vulnerable and sweet. I realized that she couldn't be the terrible person that the Internet presented her to be. The media often got it wrong, I was aware of that, but with the case of Kayla I felt like they were way off.

  In the very short time that I'd been around her, I got the distinct impression that the only reason she ever acted out was because she felt trapped, out of control of her life, and she wanted to regain that. In a way it reminded me of the way that I had run away to escape heart break. I felt like I understood her, just a little bit.

  “Do you need anything?” I asked her kindly. “Can I do anything for you?”

  “No, thank you,” she said in a small tone of voice.

  “Okay, well I can stay in your room if you like,” I said. I couldn't judge what she needed and that put me out of whack. As a dragon, I was usually pretty good at reading the emotions of others, but right now with Kayla I just couldn't get any sort of read. “That way I can keep an eye on you. But I don't think the guy will come back tonight. I think I might have scared him off for now…” Great, I was babbling.

  “Yes, please stay with me.”

  I perched on the end of her bed and examined her closely. “Did I upset you with what I told you? I'm sorry if so, I just think that you deserve to know.”

  She bolted upright at that, her eyes wide and her expression much more animated. “No, I'm glad that you told me. It's everyone else that I'm disappointed in.”

  Her long blonde hair fell past her face, and her eyes still sparkled, despite the fact that she'd been crying. She actually looked more beautiful without the makeup and the styling. Her natural look was even more gorgeous than when she was airbrushed. Shit, my heart was actually fluttering excitedly as I stared at her.

  “I just… I hate all of this,” she continued, rubbing her hands furiously together. “I hate the fact that my life is in danger and there isn't anything that I can do about it. Everyone rules my life, everyone decides everything for me, does everything for me. No one ever listens to what I want.” She sighed deeply and looked down at her feet. “The only place I ever feel like people listen to me is online. I know that's stupid but I miss it. Now I can't even do that. This guy has taken everything from me.”

  I instinctively wrapped my arms around her, wanting her to feel a little better. It might have been inappropriate to overstep the boundary in that way, but the humanity in me just needed to see her smile.

  “I'm sorry,” I told her awkwardly. “It sucks that this is happening to you. I wish there was something I could do to make it better.”

  “But you are,” she insisted quickly. “You're here, you're being honest with me, you're going to help me catch this guy…”

  She was giving me a look, a hooded, desire-filled look that had every nerve inside my body standing up on edge. She actually looked like she wanted me, and it was becoming increasingly difficult to resist.

  Stop it! I warned myself. Behave yourself!

  But it was so damn hard, because I hadn't felt that magnetism between me and another person in a very long time. I hadn't felt connected with anyone in a life time.

  I had to though, I needed to remember was why I was here: to protect her, to make her life less complicated, not to add to anything.

  “You know, I haven't met anyone like you before,” she mused, making my mouth run dry. “You're different, and I really like that. I'm surrounded by fake people, but you don't seem to be that way.”

  “You… you don't even know me,” I replied dryly, trying to distance myself from her. “I could be anything, anyone.”

  “Well,” she batted back instantly. “I get the sense that you aren't. I don't know why but I feel…” Unfortunately, just as she was getting to the good part, she stopped herself short. I stared at her, willing her to go on, but she was biting down on her lip hard, trying to keep it all inside.

  Those lips… I could not stop looking at them. Wait, am I leaning in? I felt myself going in for the kiss, and I begged myself to stop, but it seemed that my brain had totally disconnected from my body and was just doing what it wanted. This is wrong, I can't do this, I need to stop…

  But she was leaning in too, her lips pouting out, her eyes sliding closed. How was I supposed to resist when she was pulling me in with her raw sexuality?

  Maybe this was how she got people, maybe this was what made her famous, her charisma…

  Shit, our lips had crashed together, fireworks were exploding inside me, and there wasn't a damn thing that I could do about it. Her hands were tangled up in my hair, mine were around her waist. This was growing hotter and hotter by the second, I was about to lose all control.

  I wanted this, I needed this, I need to feel her, all of her and from the way that she was grappling at me she did too. Was this really going to happen? Were we actually going to do this?

  ***

  Kayla

  Oh my God, was this really happening? Was I actually kissing this guy? And did it really feel so good? I knew that Hex was hot, and that he had a real intense sexuality about him, but the passion he was creating inside of me felt off the scale.

  I didn't usually sleep with guys right away, I was much more accustomed to waiting until at least the fourth date because I liked to understand what guy's intentions were with me, but now… now I was feeling like I might just be in the mood to break that cycle. My whole body was on fire, my brain was swimming with desire, I felt hot and sticky and we hadn't even done anything yet…

  “Wait,” he snapped back from me, panting hard. “Shit, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that. That was…” he stood up, backing away from me as if I was a succubus or something, drawing him in to me. “I'm your bodyguard, I'm supposed be… to be looking after you…” his eyes were flickering everywhere as if he were scared that we'd been seen.

  “It's okay,” I told him miserably as everything inside of me cooled. “Don't worry about it, we can just… forget it.” If he was going to freak out and regret it, then I really didn't want anything to happen either. I needed to be wanted and needed, and that feeling had gone. “Let's just… get some sleep.”

  I glanced down sadly at the bed beneath me, imagining what could have been happening if he'd just allowed his body to lose control. It would have been so intense, so much fun. I'd never felt so much chemistry before and I wanted to know how that would go…

  Still, it didn't matter now. It was time to forget about it and move on.

  “Shall I go out into the hallway?” Hex asked nervously. “I can still wait out there if you want…”

  “No,” I replied a little too sharply. “No you can't leave me alone.”

  “But I won't sleep…”

  “The windows,” I gasped, terror gripping onto my heart. This was about so much more than one failed kiss. “What if he gets in?” I shivered involuntarily as I remembered the texture of him against me, his smell, the horror he struck into my body. I didn't want to be alone again. “Please stay.”

  “Yeah… yeah okay I will,” he nodded slowly. “I'll just sleep on the couch or something.”

  I handed him some sheets, and watched as he climbed himself into a snuggled position. I wanted those arms around me again, I needed him to hold me, but there was no way that I could ask again. This was going to have to be enough.

  I grabbed myself some pajamas and made my way into the bathroom to change. There, I stared at my reflection in the mirror for a moment, looking at how weird I looked under the harsh lighting. My expression was a mix of fear and sadness, my eyebrows knotted tightly together, my skin pale and pasty. The world got the best version of me, always. That was what I was paid to give them, but tha
t was so far from what I looked right now.

  Urgh. I shook my head sadly and glanced away from the shiny mirror. This situation was crazy. I had so much else to worry about, and my life was in danger. I shouldn't have been concerned about who did and didn't want me.

  By the time I slunk back into the room, it seemed that Hex was sleeping, but as he turned to face me and our eyes locked I felt the tension rise again. There was definitely something between us. No matter what either of us thought, that wasn't going anywhere, but it really didn't matter. We'd just proven that nothing could ever happen.

  “Goodnight,” I whispered, climbing under my own bed sheets.

  “Yeah, goodnight.” He sounded just about as sad as I felt.

  My head hit the pillow, but I couldn't sleep. The sexual tension was floating above our heads and it was making me feel all kinds of things. I wondered what he was thinking, if Hex was having the same kind of thoughts as me, but of course I couldn't ask. Not without making things more awkward than the already were.

  The image of his mouth on my neck filled my mind in a split second, and despite the fact that I really didn't want it to I found myself writhing a little, gripping onto the sheets beneath me.

  Good God I wanted him, I wanted him bad.

  “Hex?” I asked quietly, turning over to face him, but this time he really was asleep. His chest was rising and falling lightly and he let out a light snore.

  Great, just me suffering then. I was the only one in a desperate needy state. It seemed that Hex had kissed me then fallen asleep from boredom! He didn't care that nothing had progressed at all.

  I was an idiot, and about to get my heart handed to me on a plate if I wasn't careful.

  “I'm your bodyguard, I'm supposed be… to be looking after you…”

  It seemed that he really meant that, and it wasn't just something that he was saying. I needed to accept that and move on. I squeezed my eyes closed and tried to think about something else, anything else, but the only person in my brain was him. I might have only known Hex for a few hours, but it had already been a roller coaster of a ride with him. I had gone from hating him and what he stood for, to having my life saved by him, to kissing him… then being rejected by him.

  How the hell were we going to act normally around each other now? This was going to be impossible… I needed my stalker caught sooner rather than later. Then there would be no need for Hex to stick around, then I could go back to mostly, sort of, looking after myself.

  ***

  Hex

  I didn't sleep a wink last night, not even for one second. I might have pretended that I did, just to stop me and Kayla from doing something stupid, but I couldn't.

  I was miserable, absolutely disappointed, and that sensation hadn't gone even though many hours had passed. Kayla was the first woman that I had really liked in ages, and I'd been forced to push her off me, just to be sensible. I hadn't wanted to, especially not when I was about to lose control, but I really didn't want to end up regretting it. I didn't want to be a mistake.

  I guess that was one of my biggest fears; that she was only kissing me because she was freaked out by what happened with he stalker. I didn't want her to leap on me just because I protected her and told her the truth. I wanted her to want me.

  “Morning,” she said warily, sitting up to give me an odd look. “How are you feeling today?” I didn't want to lie to her, so I figured it was best to not say anything at all about myself. “So I better go and see Mouse quickly, find out what the plan is for today. That will give you time to shower and… and whatever.”

  “Yeah, yeah okay…” she flushed bright red as if some untoward thought had crossed her mind, which intrigued me greatly. Was she imagining something to do with me… kissing her, touching her..?

  “Great,” I shot back sharply. “See you in a bit then.”

  As I crossed the hotel room hallway to Mouse's room, I felt sick to my stomach. How the hell was I going to explain any of this to him? Not the kiss of course, I hoped that he never found out about that, but about the encounter with the stalker, and me telling Kayla the truth. That could have gotten me fired, and I really didn't want that to happen.

  Maybe it was best to get defensive, to blame him and tell him that he should have known that would have happened. Or maybe I needed to say nothing at all. There wasn't any law that said I needed to tell him, was there? I worked for the agency, not him, and I couldn't remember ever seeing that specific rule. Sure I was just trying to find a loophole, but I felt overly protective of Kayla now, and I didn't want to leave her in the hands of anyone else. I had to keep my job.

  “Good morning,” he said as he burst out of the door before I got a chance to make any kind of decision. “I was just coming to find you. Did Kayla tell you that she has a television interview today? With that music channel, what is it called?” He clicked his fingers at me but I simply shrugged my shoulders. “Anyway, we need to get over to wardrobe in a minute. I'm pretty sure the car is waiting outside.”

  “Right, I'll just go and get her then.” That left me with no choice, there just wasn't any time to get into any deep and meaningful conversation. Well good, I wasn't in the mood for it anyway. Then if it came up again I could just say that I never got the chance to explain.

  I opened the bedroom door to hear the shower still running. For a moment, my mind went exactly where it shouldn't go, to the gorgeous girl under the hot steaming water. I couldn't help but wonder what it would be like naked.

  Shit, my stomach was swirling, a heat creeping its way through my veins. I fanned my face quickly, needing to calm myself down, then I called out to Kayla. “I'm sorry to disturb you Kayla, but Mouse said we have to go now. You have an interview in a bit.”

  “Oh God,” she groaned loudly over the sound of the rushing water. “I totally forgot about that, alright.”

  I paced the room for a moment, waiting for her before realizing that I probably needed to vacate the room. Chances were Kayla was going to come out here wrapped in only a towel and that was an image that I really didn't need. Things were bad enough just imagining her.

  “I'll go out into the hallway to wait for you,” I told her awkwardly through the door. “I'll see you in a moment.”

  Once I was outside I sucked in a deep breath of air and I pressed my back against the door in a weary exhaustion. I couldn't believe that I was back here again, pining after someone who could never be mine. With Vivien, I could blame a lot of it on being young and naïve, unable to control my emotions, but now I was supposed to be much more mature. I should have grown over the last few years. Kayla was human, famous, and effectively my employer for the time being, not someone that I needed to be falling for.

  What the hell was wrong with me?

  For a moment, thought back to Luci, the dragon I met in New York. She was sweet, kind, generous, the sort of woman that I really should have ended up with, but I found myself bored and totally uninterested. Maybe I thrived on the drama, maybe that was what I needed in my life. Maybe I was one of those people who needed something to be exciting and crazy for me to be interested.

  Oh God, that meant my life would never be straightforward, I was going to be in this weird, horrible limbo. That was a hideous outlook for my future. If that was what I needed to be interested, then how the hell was I ever going to meet anyone normal? How would I find someone to be with, someone to marry and have kids with? I'd always assumed that another dragon shifter would be better for me to save all the hassle, but now I was actually thinking that maybe a human could be better. Then I could have all the drama of turning my partner into a hybrid. That would be interesting...

  ***

  Kayla

  As the car whizzed along to my interview – which I really wasn't in the mood for by the way – I kept sneaking glances at Hex. I was trying not to, but I couldn't seem to help myself.

  I had dreamed wild things last night, mostly about him, but there was only one image that was sticking firmly in my
mind. It was me, as his bride, as a dragon hybrid. That wasn't anything that I'd ever considered before. I was perfectly happy being human thank you very much. I wasn't one of those girls who aimed to become a hybrid, but somehow, with Hex that thought wasn't so scary after all.

  As a dragon hybrid, I would look a little different, more dragon-like, and I would be stronger too. I wouldn't have all the dragon abilities. I wouldn't be able to fly or change shape or anything, but it would give me the expanded life span of a shapeshifter. And I would be able to get pregnant by a dragon, too.

  Not that I was thinking about having babies anytime soon, not while I was in the beginning-middle of my career. Although dragon babies would be pretty cute…

  “Right, we're here,” Mouse interrupted my thought patterns, making me jump out of my skin. “Go on, hurry off to wardrobe, we're already late.”

  I raced off, forcing myself not to look backwards at Hex for fear of turning bright red, and I quickly found myself in the whirlwind of being made TV-presentable. I had clothes placed on me, my hair twisted and styled in all kinds of ways, and makeup plastered thickly on my face.

  I was back to the Kayla that I usually presented to the world – the strong, confident, charismatic woman. Hidden was the truth of me, that I felt insecure, that I occasionally felt like a fraud, that the life had been handed to me by mistake. I needed to keep her pushed down because as soon as the world sensed that weakness within me they would leap upon that like a vulture.

  I stepped out onto the stage to a booming round of applause from the audience. I'd been here before, I had done plenty of things like this, but it always blew me away a bit. I always felt a little like a deer caught in the headlights, especially under the burning, white TV lights.

  “Hello there, Kayla,” the presenter greeted me. I shook her hand, but even as I stared at her, her name escaped me. I should have known her, she was pretty famous herself, but my head was not in the game today. “So how are you doing?” she grinned, brushing past my silence, ever the professional.

 

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