He was getting too close right now.
Not that Colin wasn’t appealing on other levels. Colin was very cute. He’d gotten even better-looking since the summer, when he and Carly had been seeing each other. However, his shaggy sandy-blond hair could use a bit of a trim.
Suddenly I found myself stroking that sandy blond hair back off his forehead like I had no control over what my hand chose to do. I stared up at him hungrily.
Bad. This was bad. He’d gotten too close. Only a foot away now and my brain started going blurry at the edges. And his scent, like cinnamon, apple pie—spicy and warm—became impossible to ignore. Bishop smelled even better to me and I was drawn to him like nobody else, but he didn’t have a soul to worry about.
Colin did.
His brown-eyed gaze had darkened and he slid an arm around my waist, pressing me up against a set of lockers. “Don’t tell me you don’t feel it, Sam.”
“I don’t.” I sounded breathless. So hungry.
“I know you don’t want to hurt Carly. I get that. But just give me a chance.”
I was shaking my head. Too close, way too close. “I can’t do this.”
He didn’t seem deterred in the slightest. “I want to kiss you so badly right now.”
“Me, too.”
Why had Bishop suggested I go to school, knowing what I was and what I had to deal with? I didn’t feel at all normal right now. All I felt was ravenous.
“I knew it.” He grinned. “We’ll figure this out. Nobody has to get hurt, I promise.”
And then, suddenly, he slipped out of my grasp to head in the classroom door. My daze immediately vanished and I inhaled deeply to try to clear my head.
Nobody has to get hurt. I really wished he was right about that.
I knew one thing for certain—even though we were in the middle of the school hallway, I would have kissed him just now, even knowing exactly what that meant. Maybe I would kiss anyone with a soul who got within a foot of me.
I wouldn’t let that happen again until I got this under control.
Just before I went into class, I noticed somebody watching me. It was my redheaded nemesis, Jordan.
“Color me surprised.” A frown creased her forehead. “You’re all over everybody’s boyfriend this week, aren’t you? Who knew you were such a slut?”
I gave her the finger and an icy glare then pushed through the door. For the entire hour, I felt Colin staring at me while I struggled to control my insatiable hunger. So much for trying to act normal.
I hated Tuesdays.
* * *
All day, it was nearly impossible for me to concentrate, but I couldn’t really say I tried all that hard. Still, I needed to keep up my grades to get into my first choice college. If I focused on that, it helped a little. I had come to loathe this city over the years and to escape it was my main goal in life, even before I’d been trapped here by an invisible supernatural barrier. I’d leave the “maintaining the balance of the universe” part to the professionals.
At lunch, I chose to become a total loner and stay away from the tantalizing scent of other kids. I shoved my ham sandwich into my mouth practically whole, kind of like a python swallowing a small, bread-encased pig. Unfortunately, ham sandwiches weren’t even making a dent in satisfying my hunger today.
But I managed to control myself. I managed to appear vaguely normal. I guess, if I looked at it that way, it was a successful day.
I avoided Colin and I didn’t see Carly at all until school let out. Likely she was avoiding me. I stared bleakly at the blank screen of my cell phone as I sat on the steps outside, waiting for her to appear, clutching my leather bag to my chest.
Finally, Carly exited the school. When she spotted me, she made a beeline toward me.
She didn’t look nearly as shiny as she had this morning. “We need to talk.”
Uh-oh. I had a strange feeling I knew what the subject was going to be. Bigmouthed Jordan had witnessed me practically climbing Colin like a rope this morning. Had she told everybody? I was going to kill her. But first I’d have to get through a very unpleasant discussion with Carly about why I needed to keep my greedy, hungry paws off her ex-boyfriend.
“It’s not what you think,” I began, when we went down the stairs and stepped onto the path—the same one I’d used to follow after Kraven only yesterday morning. It led to the parking lot. Dry leaves crunched under our feet.
Carly eyed me. “What are you talking about?”
She looked genuinely confused, so before I admitted to something I didn’t have to, I took a deep breath. “Okay, well, what did you want to talk to me about? Oh…wait, I know. I said we’d talk about Bishop and Stephen. That’s what this is, right?”
“You’re acting strange today.”
I hitched my bag up on my shoulder, realizing I’d started to sound like a babbling lunatic. “I know. I’m strange. But you already knew that.”
“Yeah, but this is extreme even for you. It’s that Bishop guy, isn’t it? He’s got you all crazy.”
Interesting choice of words.
The parking lot was up ahead. I could see Carly’s red Beetle from here. “You could say that.”
She pulled a pair of dark sunglasses out of her purse and slid them on. “Who is he? Where does he go to school?”
“He’s—uh, he’s not in school right now.”
She hopped the curb and sat against the hood of her car. Other kids got in their cars and left the parking lot. I tried to focus my attention on my friend and her questions about the local angel-in-residence.
“How did you meet him?” she asked. “Just last night at Crave, or somewhere else?”
Dangerous subject matter there. I raked my hair over my shoulder and played with it nervously. “I met him Sunday night after the movies when I walked home. We, uh, hit it off.”
“Are you dating him?”
I crossed my arms over my chest, making a note to get my winter coat out of the attic earlier than I normally would. It might help with the chill I always felt. “Dating. No…I really wouldn’t call it that.”
“What would you call it, then?”
This was getting us nowhere, especially since I wasn’t inclined to tell her the truth. “What’s with the twenty questions?”
Her lips thinned. “I guess I feel like he should be someone really special in order for you to ditch me last night like you did.”
And there it was. Her shiny, happy outlook today was just an act. There was something else about her, though. Something deeper. She seemed different. “I knew you were upset about that. But you were acting all ‘I’m so happy’ this morning.”
“I am happy.” She pulled her car keys out of her purse. I hoped that meant this conversation was coming to an end. “I want you to tell me more about Bishop.”
“He’s just a guy.” Also, a gorgeous angel who made my heart pound like nobody else, the brother of a demon, and part-time crazy. Not necessarily in that order.
“Just a guy,” she repeated like she didn’t believe me. Then again, she knew me as well as I knew her. I was certain she sensed something was seriously off with me, too.
“What’s the problem?” I asked. “Like, seriously, what’s the problem? Is it just the ditching thing? I’m sorry. It won’t happen again. You don’t know what it was like, though. After I confronted Stephen—”
“You weren’t the only one to confront Stephen last night.”
My mouth dropped open. “Excuse me?”
“I was mad at him, too, you know. I don’t like it when people mess with my friends and hurt their feelings. I wanted to give him a piece of my mind.”
A shiver went down my spine and it had nothing to do with the temperature. “Please tell me you’re kidding.”
“I knew you wouldn’t like it, but I had to. After you left the club, I stuck around until he came downstairs. Then I had a talk with him.”
I bit my tongue so hard it nearly drew blood as the kid who owned the car parked
right next to Carly’s got in and backed out of the space. My heart was now hammering in my chest, so loud it made it difficult to think.
“You shouldn’t have done that,” I said, feeling dizzy. “You don’t know what— Oh, my God, Carly. You don’t know how bad of an idea that was! When he kissed me—”
“He kissed me, too.”
I literally stopped breathing. I just stared at her with horror, feeling the blood drain from my face. “Oh, Carly…no, please don’t tell me that. You don’t know what it means. He’s not just some good-looking guy. When he kisses you, it could mean that—”
“It means that I’m like him now,” she said calmly. “Just like you are. I know, he told me everything. Well, first I kind of yelled at him for using you and then walking away, but after he kissed me everything started making a whole lot more sense. Well, after I woke up. I passed out for a minute there, just like you did. He took off on me, too, but he came back.” She frowned. “You look like you’re going to puke.”
That was exactly what I might be doing, if I wasn’t so busy trying not to hyperventilate. This couldn’t be happening. I was having a nightmare and I was going to wake up any minute. “No, no, please, Carly—tell me you’re just messing with me right now.”
She frowned at me. “It’s okay, Sam. Everything’s okay. Stephen explained to me how you’re having a hard time with this—that you can’t see how great it is. But it is great. We’re improved now, can’t you feel it?” She put her hands to her waist. “I actually feel lighter. Like, at least five pounds. I wonder how much a soul weighs?”
“How can you say it like it’s no big deal?” I needed to sit down. Either that or I was going to drop. I found my way to the curb and slumped down heavily on it. All the stress I’d been fighting all day came back in full force. “I’m going to kill him. I’m going back there tonight and I’m going to kill him for doing this to you!”
She sat down next to me and put an arm around me. “No, you’re not. What you’re going to do is take a few deep breaths. It’s okay, Sam. Really.”
I stared at her with horror. “This is not okay! And you being all blasé about getting kissed by Stephen—and actually knowing what that means—it’s freaking me out even more!”
She grabbed hold of my hand and squeezed it. “Look, I know this Bishop guy has been filling your head with lies. Stephen wants what’s best for you, Sam. He was worried when you took off last night and he knows he didn’t handle things the right way. Just relax. Everything’s going to be fine.”
No, this was not fine in any way, shape or form. Stephen kissed Carly. He knew she was my best friend and he’d turned her into a gray as some sort of revenge against me for running off with Bishop and leaving him behind.
I tried to gather myself, to think rationally. At this point, I couldn’t fall apart. I’d wanted to protect Carly from finding out anything about this, but she’d stumbled on to the truth anyway. It was all my fault she’d been at the club last night in the first place, and then I’d left her alone and run off with Bishop!
But Bishop said he could restore my soul. If he could do that for me, then he could do it for Carly, too. I could fix this, it wasn’t too late. Carly was in control of herself and taking all this crazy information in stride. Now it was out in the open and we could deal with it.
“It’s going to be okay, Carly,” I finally said, squeezing her hand.
“Of course it is. So tell me…who is Bishop? Where did he come from? What does he want?”
It was on the tip of my tongue to tell her, but I forced myself to hold back. She was too eager for this information, too inquisitive—like an investigative reporter. That wasn’t like her. I bet Stephen had asked her to find out everything she could about Bishop from me. Stephen had fooled her into believing he was a tall, dark and handsome guy helping girls free themselves from the burden of their souls.
I hated him more at that moment than I’d ever hated anyone in my life.
Despite the dark feelings swirling inside me, I forced myself to give her a casual shrug. “Like I said before, he’s just a guy.”
“Okay, fine, if you say so.” She got to her feet and helped pull me to mine. “Here’s what’s going to happen. You and I are going to Crave tonight. There’s somebody who’s going to be there who wants to meet you.”
“Who?” The thought of going back to the nightclub didn’t appeal to me in the slightest.
She shrugged. “All I know is she’s someone important.”
“She?” A shiver of fear went through me. Maybe it was the Source—the one Bishop was searching for.
Carly looked at me with concern. “It’s going to be okay, you know.”
“Is it?”
“Of course it is.” Carly pushed her sunglasses off her face so I could see her eyes. They weren’t glazed or dazed or anything other than totally sincere. She was actually worried right now. About me. There was nothing about her that looked remotely like an out-of-control, soul-sucking monster.
Come to think of it, I had yet to see one of these mindless zombielike grays Bishop had told me about. Carly seemed just like me—rational and levelheaded. And not running around kissing anybody with lips.
“Do you trust me?” she asked.
I didn’t have to think about it long. “Of course I do.”
“More than anybody?”
I nodded. Twelve years of being best friends had to count for something.
“And you want the whole truth about what’s going on in this city right now?”
“Yes, of course.”
“Then you’re going to get it tonight. Stephen was worried I wouldn’t be able to convince you to come back. He knows he made a really bad impression on you. I don’t think he’s half as cool as he tries to pretend to be.”
“This is not news to me.”
“So come on, come to Crave with me again tonight.” She grinned. “Tuesdays are half-price chicken wings night.”
I let out a shaky breath and ignored my stomach rumble. “That does sound tempting.”
“Thought it might. This hunger—it’s not that easy to deal with, is it?”
“You feel it, too?”
“Oh, my God, yes. You should have seen what I ate at lunch. I went to McDonald’s. I think they’ve put up a wanted poster for me as the girl who gulped down four McChickens in one sitting. And two large fries.”
“Wow. Impressive.”
The only thing that tempted me to return to Crave tonight was the promise of answers. Real ones, this time, not half-truths and shiny sales pitches from Stephen. I needed Bishop to restore my soul, but in the meantime, I might as well do a little research of my own. It could help him, too, if this led me to the Source.
“Fine,” I finally said. “I’ll go.”
She gave me a tight hug then unlocked the driver’s side door to her Beetle. “I’ll pick you up at eight. Dress up. I think we should try to look really hot tonight.”
I frowned at her. “What, you’re just leaving me here? The least you can do is give me a ride home.”
“You live three blocks away.”
“What’s your point?”
She laughed. “Fine, lazy. Get in.”
Best friends till the end—that had always been our philosophy. Both of us were now missing our souls thanks to a kiss from Stephen Keyes. And so far, nothing seemed like it had changed except our increased desire for chicken wings and fast food.
That was a huge relief.
Maybe Bishop was wrong about grays. Maybe he’d been given some lousy information and this mission was a big waste of time and effort—something had totally been blown out of proportion. Maybe everything was going to turn out okay, whether or not my soul was successfully restored.
No, I didn’t think it would be nearly that easy, either. All I knew for sure was that I’d be getting some more answers tonight. I just wished the questions weren’t getting so damn scary.
Chapter 14
There was no sign o
f Bishop or the others after school or into the evening. Even if I’d wanted to contact him, I had no idea how.
I couldn’t stop thinking about him. From what I’d learned about him and Kraven, to hoping he could help Carly, Bishop was constantly on my mind. Also, I liked being near him—the warmth he gave me, the sound of his voice, his tall and strong presence that made me feel safe and protected. I even liked the way he challenged and aggravated me sometimes.
I missed him more than I ever would have expected.
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