Tristan and I were in new territory. We've never fought, argued, nothing. "I heard what you said." I open my mouth to speak, but Tristan waved off my attempt as Kellie had. "And I want you to know how much that means to me, and I'm sorry for being such a dick last night. I didn't mean what I said and I know that doesn't make what happened any better, but I want you..." He hesitated. Something shifted in his eyes, regret, maybe? He finished. "I'll always want you in my life...as my best friend. Forever."
I had to jump over this agonizing hurtle. Instead of rushing in for a hug, and pretending we were fine, I stood my ground. "I'm glad to hear that, but things are going to change." This time I held my hand up to stop him. "You're getting married and you'll have Kellie to turn to, to talk with when you aren't sure what you should do, and that's okay. That's how things are supposed to be. I'm not saying we won't still hang out or we won't be friends, but just not like we are now." I didn't wait for his answer, because putting the unspoken truth of how our relationship would change into words nearly broke me. I walked to my door, opened it, and headed straight to the bathroom.
In zombie-like motion, I undressed, turned on the water and got in. In the shower, the hot water mixed with my tears as I washed my hair. I ended up staying under until the water ran cold.
Tristan and Kellie were gone by the time I finished my ice cold shower. When I got out, I dressed in comfy clothes and watched TV on the couch. Ginger came home, but didn't stay long and Tisha said she'd be at her parents for the rest of the weekend. When Alyssa showed up, she and I made plans to hang with Bret and Eric. The guys invited us to a big Frisbee golf game. I liked Eric, and figured I might as well move on and stop dreaming of a future that was never mine to wish for.
After our plans were set, I headed to my closet and changed into something a bit less depressing. I heard my cell ring in the living room, but didn't rush to answer, knowing Alyssa would grab my phone for me.
"Elle, Tristan's on the phone," Alyssa yelled as I grabbed my shoes. I ran out to the living room.
"Thanks," I told her, taking my phone from her. "Hey." Tristan immediately began yelling. I peeked up and seeing Alyssa's glare, I headed to our room for some privacy. Tristan rambled on about Kellie and his dad working together behind his back. When he finished, I barely caught his goodbye.
A few minutes later, I went back to Alyssa. "Hey, I've got to meet Tristan. I'll catch up with you guys later, okay?" If I didn't get over to Tristan soon, he'd do something he'd regret.
"He's a big boy, Elle. Let his fiancée take care of his shit and get on with your life." Alyssa stood in front of me. Her face turned red with her hands tightly fisted, but her reaction softened just as quickly.
"Sorry, fine, whatever, go. I'll let Eric down easy, but you owe me. Got it?" I hugged her in response. On my way out, I heard her yell, "Don't forget you owe me!"
When I pulled up to the address Tristan gave me, I had to slam on my breaks to keep from nearly being hit by a black range rover screeching out of the driveway. I caught a quick glance at Kellie's blotchy face. Tear streaks ran through her makeup, but she didn't notice me as she raced down the street. I parked my car and walked to Tristan's front door. Before opening it, I took a deep breath, then let myself in.
"Kellie, I told you to get out of my fucking house." Tristan yelled when I closed the door behind me. "I said–" Tristan stopped when he noticed me.
"Things on the rocks already, huh? You should've moved the couch to the other wall. Would've made things more feng shui," I joked.
"Hey." Tristan looked and sounded defeated. I ignored the need to console him.
"So I guess you didn't take the news well?" Tristan's look of surprise made me laugh, and I raised my hands in front of me. "Listen, I found out last night what she did, so lay off, and don't you dare throw that pillow."
Too late. I tossed it back then dived behind a stack of boxes. I gathered a round of arsenal and threw them one right after the other, only missing him once.
"Okay, I give." Tristan's surrender didn't fool me. I picked up something blue before I stood, keeping my hand shielded behind my back, and found him mirroring me.
"I'll stop if you stop," I said, attempting to coerce him. His lips curled up in a sinister grin. He threw a wadded up shirt at me, but I dodged his assault and hurtled toward him, shoving the blue whatever I held in his mouth.
The momentum when our bodies met tumbled us both to the floor. We laughed. When I looked up and noticed how close our faces were, my breathing stopped, but his seemed to increase. Clumsily, I worked myself off the floor, holding out my hand to help him up.
"What the hell?" He took the blue material from his mouth. His cheeks turned pink. A pair of panties. Kellie's panties. Reality just dropped back in my lap.
"Okay so when did you ditch the boxers and go all girl panties on me? I can see now why you turned down the football scholarship here." I lowered my voice to a whisper, "I'll keep this our little secret."
Tristan's brows furrowed. "Did you really know what she and my dad did?" Tristan's wounded expression made me want to comfort him, but again I held back.
"Yes. I told you I found everything out last night, but she was right." His shock resembled my own. I could not believe what I was about to do. "Listen, stop acting like a baby. Kellie and your dad both love you and that's why they did what they did. You shouldn't be upset with them. Call your dad and Kellie and make things right. I'm sure she'll forgive you." I had to look away, and pretended to sift through an open box beside me.
"She loves you and you love her. That's supposed to be worth saving."
"Elle." His soft tone worked at my already unstable emotions. His light touch against my shoulder only intensified those feelings, but I didn't turn. I couldn't.
"Go ahead and call." With my shoulders squared, I finally turned, meeting his perfect light brown eyes with my determined ones. "I've got a double date with Alyssa that I'm missing. Are you finished throwing your fit?" Something shifted in his eyes, but the emotion cleared before I could understand the meaning.
"Fine, wouldn't want my messed up shit to keep you from your hot date." He laughed, though it seemed forced. "Thanks for coming, Spud. I can always count on you to be here for me. I'll call Kellie. You know, she got a little pissed when I called you to come over." Tristan took his phone out. I almost told him not to call her, but reneged when he answered the person on the other end of his phone.
"Kellie, I'm sorry."
"See ya." I gave him a double thumbs up and dashed outside to my car.
When I pulled up to the Frisbee golf course, Alyssa said Eric left when I didn't show. Great, I decided to move on with my life, do the right thing by keeping Tristan and Kellie together, and this was the thanks I got. Life really sucked sometimes.
Chapter 8
Tristan
Kellie had been riding my ass about Elle, and the shit she and my dad pulled behind my back fucking pissed me off. I didn't give a shit that Kellie was pissed when I called Elle. I wanted to talk with her instead of arguing with Kellie. Of course, she didn't understand.
Last night I fully prepared myself to walk away from Elle, until I found her in the kitchen this morning. Later when we talked, she told me our relationship would change. I knew things with us would be different. Hell, she had said what I planned to say–only I couldn't. I couldn't walk away from her either. Thing is, with Elle, everything seemed easy–being with her, talking to her. I didn't need to pretend in order to make her happy.
When Elle suggested I call Dad and Kellie, to forgive them, I could see her reasoning. Then she mentioned missing a date to be here with me. I felt like someone had punched me in the fucking stomach. How did my life become such a clusterfuck?
The sound of a vehicle pulling into the drive caught my attention. I hadn't realized I hoped to see Elle until I felt the disappointment when Kellie walked in instead.
We stared at each other in silence. Her face was a mess. The black shit she piled on
her lashes ran down her face like war paint.
I did love Kellie, I mean, do love her, but could I get over her deliberate scheming? I expected my dad to pull this kind of shit, but not Kellie. She'd worked with him and all the while I’d been completely clueless. The devious manner of what she'd done reminded me a bit too much of him. My dad never cared whom he had to hurt to get what he wanted, just as long as he won in the end. Her shoulders began to shake and tears rimmed the bottom of her eyes. I'm not an insensitive bastard, but she deserved this.
"Tristan, I'm so sorry." Kellie hiccuped. "I love you and I want to be with you, but I won't be second place in your heart. I know you and Elle are friends but I don't like it, and when you called her while we were fighting..." Kellie closed her eyes.
She opened her eyes again, determined. "I won't be second to her, Tristan, not ever again. If you're upset, then talk to me. Tell me what you want, but you can't run to someone else when things get tough. We're supposed to be in this together and if we can't talk to each other now, then what will that mean when we're married?"
She had a point. Regardless of still being pissed, I walked over and wrapped my arms around her. Being a little shorter than Elle, I had to slouch to rest my head against hers.
"Kellie, what you and my dad did was wrong." She looked up at me, her brows pulled in the center. With the black shit down her face, I almost laughed again.
"I do love you, but if this is going to work then you can't lie to me again. I mean it, Kellie, or we'll end what we have together." I hadn't meant to sound harsh, but I was still pissed and a simple apology hadn't changed anything.
"Just promise we'll get through this. Promise when you want to talk, you'll talk to me and not...her." Kellie's eyes hardened around her demanding words.
"I'm not having this fucking conversation with you again. Elle is my best friend, whether you like her or not, but I'm with you–not her." I matched my tone to hers, waiting for her reply.
With a long sigh, Kellie bobbed her head in agreement then rested her head against my chest. I held her close, needing the feel of her next to me. I'd made the right choice, right? Kellie and I didn't fight much, or ever really. But this shit, her going behind my back, messed my head up.
"Listen." I cleared my throat. "I think we should spend some time apart." Kellie's body stiffened. "I'm not saying goodbye. I just think a few days apart would be good for us."
Her shoulders began to shake. I hugged her tighter before pulling away. Tears rolled down her face and I used my thumb to wipe them away, smudging the black streaks across her cheeks. Her eyes were wide, the fear clear to read.
"I love you." Uneasiness settled in my gut, but my facial expression remained impassive. Kellie forced her lips into a tight smile.
"I love you, too." She paused, catching her breath. "I get it, really. I...I think you're right. We spend all our free time together and...I do trust you. I promise not to turn into a crazy, jealous fiancée...again." She gave me a dimpled smile that reached her eyes this time.
"Good, ‘cause I don't want to fight anymore." I grinned down at her and she pushed up on her tiptoes. I leaned forward and kissed her until she pulled away for air. The kiss held a jagged edge of raw emotions between us, almost as if we were holding on to the past. When we broke apart, without argument, she walked to the door and left.
I sat down on the couch and took out my cell phone. I hated the way my dad pushed his way into my life, but I couldn't deny not wanting to play here either. With a long sigh, I dialed his number. He answered the line on the first ring. We didn't do small talk well and within a few minutes, we'd made a deal. I hated the fucking high superiority tone he took, but I let it go. As soon as we reached an understanding, we hung up. I'd argued enough for one day, and without effort, I fell asleep the second my head hit my pillow.
Elle
The Sunday morning church rush finally slowed down, allowing me enough time to make myself an iced latte. Grabbing my frozen drink, I headed over to a table near the window. I tried to think of anything but Tristan, but as usual, my efforts sucked. The front door opened and I started to get up until I noticed who walked in. Kellie. Really not the person I wanted to see at the moment.
"Hey. Can we talk?" Kellie gave me a small smile. She stood in front of the empty chair beside me. I considered telling her no due to the line of angry customers, but decided to hold back the sarcasm...until later.
"Sure," I agreed, and she sat in the chair in front of me, biting her thumbnail. I noticed biting her nails was a nervous habit of hers, and hoped she washed her hands frequently and didn't end up with something nasty like Hep A.
"I wanted to thank you for talking to Tristan," she paused, "and I wanted to apologize for acting so crazy. I mean, I know I said I was cool with your friendship, but you've kind of been put on a pedestal. I'm afraid I won't be able to live up to you."
I began feeling somewhat at ease until she finished her thoughts. "I know Wade and Macy approve of me and have mentioned that I would be a better person for Tristan to confide in than you, but I'm not marrying them."
I wanted to ask her who the hell did she think she was, but refrained. Tristan being a big boy, he could figure out what he was getting himself into on his own.
"Listen, I appreciate your honesty, but Tristan and I have been friends forever, with or without his parents' permission. And we will continue to be so for years to come. You can't change how we feel for one another simply because you two are engaged. I know understanding this is hard, you being so young and all, but give it a year or two and you'll understand a little better." My tone dripped with sugary sweetness. Alyssa would be proud. Besides, I couldn't take her passive aggressiveness anymore.
Kellie patted my arm. "You're right. I am young, but we'll figure this out as we go. Hey, maybe you can be one of my bridesmaids?"
She mocked me, but whatever.
"Have you set a date yet?" I couldn't contain the eager curiosity in my voice.
"I want a spring wedding and his parents are thrilled."
What a little snake!
"Oh that's great." I feigned enthusiasm. "Does Tristan know, or are you waiting until he's ushered down the aisle before you clue him in? We both know how well going behind his back turned out for you the first time."
"He knows, and I told him I wanted to be the one to tell you. I knew you would be excited." Her cheeks dimpled when she smiled. Someone walked in, saving me from either knocking the crap out of her or vomiting, because I was on the edge of both as it were.
"Wow, congrats. Listen, I've got to go, but I'll talk to you later."
She nodded and stood to leave. I didn't watch as she opened the door and left. Frank had walked in instead of a customer, ready to take over the afternoon shift. His timing had been perfect, got Two-face out of here and allowed me to go home. Without hesitation, I picked up my stuff and headed toward the exit.
"See ya, Frank. I think you'll have a light afternoon."
On the drive home, I played over the conversation with Kellie. I refused to call Tristan. I wouldn't give her the satisfaction of knowing I wanted to confirm her story. I'd wait until Tristan brought the date up. However, after the sugary heated words his future wife and I just underwent, I didn't expect to be getting a call anytime soon.
At home, I went straight to my room.
"Hey, Alyssa." I tried not to let Kellie's news bother me, but the words “wedding" and “set date" got to me.
"What the hell is your problem?" Alyssa sat on her bed, her computer on her lap, with an irritated expression as she looked at me.
"Sorry, but I don't know what you're referring to. All I said was, hey."
Alyssa rolled her eyes and sighed. "Fine, whatever."
"All right, you obviously have something on your mind. Let's have it." I had a fifty/fifty chance her irritation wasn't directly pointed at me.
"You want to know what my problem is?" Alyssa closed her laptop and set it on the bed beside her. "I'm ti
red of your ass moping over a guy who has never given you the time of day."
My eyes widened, and Alyssa rolled her eyes.
"Give me a little credit, will ya? I'm not a complete idiot, Elle. You're in love with Tristan, but for the life of me, I don't know why. Why would you want to put yourself through the torture of playing nice with his ludicrous engagement?"
I stood staring at my best friend in shock. Apparently, she had more to say.
"We both know he could do better. The other night, I thought for once you were going to suck it up and show him what he's been missing all this time, but no. Nope, not sweet non-confrontational Elle. You had a chance, and you let it slip right through your fingers."
I didn't know how to respond at first. My mouth felt dry and my stomach nauseous.
Humiliated, I whispered, "I know." I darted my eyes away from her. "I'm a coward like my mom."
Alyssa laughed. "Give me a freaking break. You're nothing like your parents. Don't you dare start placing yourself in the same category as them. Hell, half your family turned their back on you because of who your dad is and the mistakes he's made, while the other half thinks you're gonna be as much of a screw up as your mom. I may not like how Tristan ignores his feelings like you do, but I've got to give him a little credit.
"He's never turned his back on you. Even when his parents said your family was a disgrace and to never speak with you again. I've always been there for you too, but either shit or get off the fucking pot. Wake up, Elle. If you're not gonna take a leap of faith with Tristan, then move on with someone else, like Eric. Who, by the way, likes you...a lot." Alyssa released a long sigh, hands on hips, fuming.
The combination of her reaction, my unpleasant run-in with Kellie, and my bottled feelings for Tristan got to me, and I broke down in tears.
Alyssa sat next to me on my bed wrapping her arm around my trembling shoulders. "Elle, I'm sorry, but it's time to move on. This is supposed to be the time of your life. Don't keep putting it on hold. Just be happy for once. Prove to your family you're better than they think you are. Hell, prove it to yourself. I dare you."
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