“Usually in December,” Esther said. “Here in the valley we rarely get it in November. The school is usually closed mid-December through January then opens in February. We still have snow, but it’s not so intense,” she explained.
“Do you like the snow?” Joseph asked. There was little snow where he planned to take her. Scorching summers and springs, but beautiful autumns and winters. If she loved the snow, she would have to learn to live without it.
“The snow is beautiful,” Esther remarked with a pensive gleam in her eye. “Beautiful and wild. That I do like about it. But after a few weeks with an energetic boy who has not been outside for days, I get pretty sick of it to be honest,” she laughed with a shake of her head. Esther actually did not like the snow. Snow meant cold, which meant sickness that led to sick mothers and children, coughs and fevers. No, she did not like the snow.
Joseph smiled with a nod of approval. Obviously, he would have liked her to say she abhorred the snow and longed to live in a warm sunlit place, like Texas, but what she said was good enough.
The ride back to the little house went by quickly. Abby found herself drifting off to sleep with her brother being unusually silent. Willing herself to stay awake until she reached her bed, Abby sat up and stretched before taking a good look at Joseph. His jaw was set firmly and his eyes narrowed as he looked ahead. He seemed to be in another world, lost in thought.
“You never asked me about what was being said today,” Abby told him breaking his spell. “The mothers at the school… about Esther.” A good part of Abby did not want to tell her brother. She loved him very much and was growing to love Esther, and she would be more than thrilled to see them marry. But she’d never seen her brother fall for a woman and she couldn’t imagine what he’d do if his heart were broken.
Joseph’s face relaxed just a tad. “I thought it was about scaring the abusive school teacher away,” he said, smiling at the thought of Esther angry and ready for battle.
Abby shook her head. “No, that was some time ago. Today when they were speaking about the Harvest Festival and how fun it was to see blooming romances among the youth, they mentioned how Esther,” she bit her cheek thinking of a delicate way to put it, “that she is just not interested in men. She treats them the same as she does women. In fact, they say she treats them below women— kind and respectful but distant. Truth is Joseph, I don’t think Esther has any intention of marrying a man or even being courted by one,” Abby blurted. She held still for a moment. Joseph said nothing for a while, only giving a simple nod to indicate he was listening to her. Abby wanted him to speak, to hear his thoughts, but Joseph was doing what she called “a man thing,” being silent and moody. Wishing she could hear his thoughts Abby turned away, deciding that it was best not to speak further.
Joseph was thinking about what Abby said, but more so about what Esther had said, how she looked, how she had reacted to his explanation of kindness. Funnily enough, he felt no discouragement; rather, he felt encouraged. So Esther had not wanted to marry, did not want to marry? All that meant was that the right man had not come along.
Well, the right man is here now.
Nine
Will stepped cautiously onto the rickety ladder as he lowered himself down Jim Tantum’s roof. Below him, young Jason and Mathew were rehearsing their horrible experience smoking cigars. “Teacher gave us chocolate the next day,” Jason explained. “Said she didn’t like seeing us vomit, but we had to learn our lesson.”
Will chuckled. “You like your teacher?” he asked, rolling his shoulders. Six hours working on a roof was enough to give any man a stiff back.
“She’s the best teacher there is,” Mathew said with a forceful nod. “She makes lessons fun.”
Will had to agree. Abby seemed to make everything fun.
A man with kindly eyes and thinning hair walked onto the porch. “Jason, Mathew, your aunt has dinner ready. Why don’t the two of you go wash up?” Jim Tantum waited until his two nephews were inside before addressing Will. “Pastor, this is the fourth time you’ve repaired my house. Will you please let me pay you something?”
Will smiled and began gathering up his tools. “Jim, the fall you took was a nasty one. I don’t want you risking that shoulder of yours.” He stood up with his tool bag in hand. “Besides, what you and your wife are doing to help those nephews of yours… well let’s just say I’ll never be able to help you enough.”
Jim’s color heightened. “Well, we love those boys as our own. Speaking of such things, if you see Miss Esther, could you have her stop by?”
Will’s face lit up. “Your wife is expecting?”
Jim tried to give a casual shrug, but the grin on his face betrayed his excitement.
Will promised he would and made his way over to his chestnut stallion. He tied his tools to the saddle, thinking he would stop by Miss Esther’s house and let her know.
Will suddenly paused. Usually the very thought of seeing Esther made his nerves ring like church bells, but now… now there was only a steady heart beat and clear mind. How peculiar, he thought, that the mention of Esther brought out no passionate or even romantic emotions in him.
“Well, I’ll be.” Will laughed audibly as a sense of relief and jubilation ran through him. He was no longer enamored with Esther Callen, and he knew exactly why. Still smiling, Will lifted himself onto the horse and rode toward the Callen’s home—all the while thinking about a pair of beautiful gray eyes.
/
By the time Friday rolled around, Abby was ready for school to be done for the week. Her idea of Halloween crafts had gone well, as had her lessons, but on Friday both the children and she were antsy and too full of energy and impatience to be kept indoors. For more than two months now Abby had either stayed in her little house, taught at the school, chatted with Esther, or gone on walks. There had been no social visits and definitely not enough trips to town. She tried to talk more with the parents this week but was allowed only so much time. Esther usually made more of an effort to talk to her, but she’d been monopolized by Joseph all of Thursday and Friday. It was obvious she was trying to avoid him. She would stop the wagon at different places to drop Michael off and pick him up. Still, Joseph would walk out to meet her and carry Michael on his back to and fro. When Abby excitedly dismissed the class Friday afternoon, she desperately needed a break. Michael stood up and as was now customary, rushed over to Joseph who was replacing a window.
“You ready, Michael?” Joseph asked, setting down his tools.
Michael nodded and lifted up his arms ready to be swung up. “When are you going to come over and teach me how to ride again?”
Joseph picked up Michael from under the arms and swung him around on his back. “Well, I guess we are going to have to ask your momma about that,” Joseph replied.
“Ask me what?” came a velvety voice that cast a soft shadow in the schoolroom.
Joseph looked up to see Esther eyeing him with amusement.
“Momma! You came in to get me. You are back to normal!” Michael hollered.
Esther laughed, her color heightening, “I decided that I needed to spare Joseph’s back.” She waved for Michael to get off and come to her. With a heavy sigh, he slid down Joseph who followed him to the entrance.
“We were just talking about Michael needing another riding lesson,” Joseph told her. My, she looked fine today; of course, she looked fine every day. As he approached her, he noticed she seemed a bit anxious—worried maybe? She grabbed Michael’s hand and quickly kissed his head as if drawing strength from it. Instinct told him something was troubling her.
“Another riding lesson, huh?” she asked with a quick twinkle in her eye that quickly faded. She looked past Joseph and at Abby who was coming forward eagerly.
“Esther, I wanted to ask you if this Sunday you could show me how to make chili? I tried last night and it was a disaster.”
Joseph grimaced upon remembrance of Abby’s experiment. “Amen to that. It was pretty awful,
” he agreed. Abby glared at him and gently swatted his arm.
Esther nodded distractedly, Joseph noted. She definitely had something on her mind. He gently touched her forearm and she drew it away, giving him an apologetic smile. Joseph frowned. What was it with this woman? He’d seen her many times embrace Michael, even kiss other women on the cheek. She seemed warm and friendly despite her reserve. Yet she seemed afraid of his touch.
“Esther,” he asked, his voice low, “are you alright?”
Esther gave him the same surprised look as she had the other night. It seemed unexpected to her that he would say something nice.
“Well,” she began, shifting under his gaze. “I need to go visit Mary Higgins.”
Abby’s face fell. “Is it her time?” she asked knowingly.
Esther shook her head. “No, but anytime now. I have tried meeting with her, but she has not yet allowed me to… or better said, she does not like other women coming to her home. I have offered to take her to my house, but she won’t leave unless it is running an errand for Toby.”
Abby made a sound of disgust. “That man has that wife of his on an iron chain.”
“A chain that she sadly wears with pride.” Esther shook her head, “Anyway, I am going over there right now. She was not at home this morning so Eliza offered to go with me in order to counter Toby.”
Abby frowned with a worried expression. “Are you taking Michael?”
Esther shook her head emphatically. “No, I won’t let him go near that house. In fact, I wanted to ask if you could watch him. I won’t be gone more than an hour or two and I have a basket of food for him that he is welcome to share with you.” She looked desperate for help, yet worried to leave Michael. Joseph concluded from her apparent anxiety that she rarely left her boy.
Michael jumped up and down. “I can stay with Joseph?” he asked, now pulling with excitement on Joseph’s arm.
“Of course he can stay.” Abby took Esther’s hand in a warm friendly gesture. “He can stay as long as you need. We will make it fun for him.”
Esther smiled. “Thank you,” she said sincerely and then kneeling down, she pulled Michael into a deep embrace. “You be a good boy Michael or no Harvest Festival for you.” She gave him a teasing flick on the nose and looked up at Joseph. “No horseback riding while I am away, please.” It was an order not a request. Joseph nodded, feeling a bit worried. He did not know who this Toby Higgins was, but it worried him that Esther was obviously unsettled and he could do nothing about it.
When Esther had left, Joseph turned to Abby. “Who are Toby and Mary Higgins?”
Abby shook her head. “A scoundrel is a polite word to call him,” she said, glancing at Michael and then back again at Joseph. “I will tell you later,” she mouthed.
Joseph nodded and looked down at Michael who was looking up at him like an adoring puppy. Joseph grinned, overcome with an unfamiliar feeling of tenderness towards this boy. Without thinking he picked up Michael and swung him onto his back.
“So Michael, your mom said no riding, but she didn’t say anything about no fishing.”
Abby watched as the figures of Joseph and Michael ambled towards a fresh mountain stream that helped nourish the valley. Joseph had discovered two random fishing rods underneath the schoolhouse, and even though he declared them ancient, he was itching to use them. Abby sighed and walked back into the schoolhouse feeling discontent and lonely. Everyone seemed to have someone. The children had their parents, the parents had each other, and so on. Even Joseph, her lone-wolf brother, seemed intent on finding someone to belong to. Everyone she knew came first to someone. It seemed a natural order.
Abby began erasing the chalkboard, her forehead tense with thought. She used to belong to her parents and she still did, but since she had come out here something had shifted. She not only wanted to be important to someone, but she wanted someone to be important to her. Maybe important was the wrong word—she wanted a binding of hearts. Being out here had put a depth into her emotions or maybe just wiped away the superficial fluff she had added over the years. Even her friendships back in Texas seemed insignificant.
Were my friends ever friends?
Girls were nice to her if she could give them a ride in her white miniature carriage or give them lace gloves for their birthday. In other words, her friends had merely been social conveniences. The men in her life had been no better than bloodhounds looking for a prize, but was she any better?
She thought of the values she had placed in her ideal man: wealth, education, a fine house… all material and socially impressive attributes. Traits like kindness, moral ethics, hardworking, gentle and noble, she had never included these. Did she even have these traits? Abby had always pictured what kind of man she wanted without thinking what kind of woman she wanted to be. What did she have to offer?
Abby tossed down the cloth and looked at the clean chalkboard. Colorado was proving to be much like the cleaning cloth, clearing her mind of false observations and thoughts. Yet even with a clear mind all she had come to realize was how undesirable she was. Her whole life had been covered with so much fluff that few really saw who she was, or even wanted what they saw. When so many men had come courting in Texas, all she’d had to do was sit, smile, laugh, and look pretty.
Abby shook her head. Why was she being so melancholy today? A soft creak from the entrance made her jump in eager delight. However, when she looked up to see no one, her expression fell. She stopped fussing with her things for a moment, pausing to contemplate why that darn pastor hadn’t stopped by for a few days. Hadn’t they begun to build a friendship of some sorts? Had they not laughed and teased? So why did he suddenly disappear out of the blue? Was it because he saw how Joseph looked at Esther and it angered him? Did Will still have feelings for Esther? The thought made Abby shift uncomfortably. She did not want Will to have feelings for Esther. She wanted him to have feelings for her.
Abby’s eyes went wide. “By golly,” she whispered as self-realization washed over her. She liked Will! Really, really liked him. In fact, from the first day she met him, she had fallen for him. She realized how often she looked up at the entrance hoping to see the blue-eyed pastor. She loved the way he teased her, made her mad, spoke sincerely, and didn’t hide his flaws. Had she indeed in such a short time lost her heart to this young auburn-haired man of God?
“A pastor’s girl—a pastors wife?” she whispered, testing out the titles. Could she and Will have a life in Tall Pine? Could she be away from Texas? Was that what she wanted? To start anew in a place where people did not know her as the spoiled rich girl? She had come to like Tall Pine, maybe even love it. She liked the feeling of fatigue after a hard day’s work. She liked to see mountains surrounding her, and she had yet to explore the town that she heard was growing rapidly. Yes, she could make it here. She wanted to make it here, and she wanted to make it with Will. The former scary thought of having children suddenly vanished and was replaced with images of chubby babies, Christmas visits to Texas, summer picnics, and holding hands on the porch.
Abby felt elevated. She wanted Will! How delightfully unexpected this was. A sudden sense of worry made her frown. She wanted Will, but did Will want her? Esther had one time told her that Will was the biggest catch to all the single ladies of Tall Pine; even some in Denver had their eye on him. What if Will did not want her? Out here in Colorado, her father’s ranch did her no good. All she had to offer was herself—and was that enough?
She was certainly not like Esther: queen-like, stunning, composed, and wise. Maybe Will wanted a more refined woman, or at least a capable woman who could sew, cook, and handle a farm single-handedly. Abby could learn those things, couldn’t she? She wanted to learn those things. The life of parties and coach rides along the river now seemed as boring as the men who’d once offered them to her.
Abby turned away from the chalkboard and quickly gathered her things. With so much to think about she left the schoolhouse to start dinner, chubby babies still bo
uncing in her mind.
/
Esther bit her lip, a feeling of trepidation gnawing at her gut. She looked over to see Eliza twirling her fingers; she was nervous as well. “Thank you for coming, Eliza,” Esther said warmly. “I know this is not the excuse you wanted to close up your shop for the day.”
“Oh come now, Esther. Do you think I was going to let you visit that odious man alone? Besides, Toby Higgins does not frighten me, and the fact that many women find him attractive is beyond me. I mean he has a pretty enough face, but something about it is, well, disturbing,” Eliza scowled.
Esther nodded. “I think as one gets older it is impossible to hide one’s character. It eventually shows through even the most handsome faces.”
Eliza nodded. “Let’s just hope the opposite is true. Maybe if I get a real good character my face will start looking nice, huh?” Eliza teased. Esther gave her a “we’re not having this discussion” look, before pulling the horses to a stop as they arrived at Toby Higgins’ home.
“Well,” Esther said quietly, “let’s get to this.”
Eliza gaped. “Esther, are you sure this is the right house? I thought this place was abandoned. I’d wondered why no one had claimed it and fixed it up.”
Esther nodded. “This is the place.” She looked over the slatternly home with chipped paint and broken windows as ghost-like curtains swung lightly in the breeze. There was no garden, no flowers, only a few scrawny chickens pecking hungrily at the garbage-littered ground. Mustering her courage, Esther climbed down to tie off the horse. Eliza followed muttering something about dirt, filth, and pigsty. Ignoring her comments, Esther walked to the front door and knocked soundly.
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