“I’d like you to kiss me too,” she put her hand over my lips as I leaned closer, “but I think we shouldn’t start something we might not be able to finish. You see, I’m a grown woman. I’m not a teenager feeling out a guy to see if I’m interested. I know what I like, and I know what feels good. If you kiss me right now we’ll probably want to touch, and then undress, and well, you can figure out the rest. It’s never just a kiss is it?”
I backed up and smiled, scratching my head to try and come up with a clever remark. “I guess not.”
She leaned forward anyway, catching me off guard. Her lips pressed against mine, but that’s all she offered. When she pulled away she simply smiled. “I’m worth the wait, Brice. I can promise you that.”
She left me there, weak in the knees on the porch. I’d anticipated more, but felt like I had enough, at least for now.
Before going inside I looked up at the night sky, thanking God for giving me this opportunity at life again. Now I needed to figure out what was next, and if I could ever take the chance and come clean to Callie about who I was, and how I’d been wrongfully accused.
Chapter 9
Patty
I’d gone and done it again – allowed myself to become interested in a man I hardly knew. I wished there was a way I could deter the feelings that he was hiding something from me, because it would make my attraction much easier to bear.
Callie wasn’t asleep when I went into the bedroom. The queen bed seemed small with someone already in it. She didn’t acknowledge me when I came in and sat down on the opposite side of the mattress. I placed my hands on either side of me and closed my eyes while sitting up. “Are you okay?”
Callie sniffled. “My parents died when I was little – around five I think. My mom was murdered in front of me. She was shot. I don’t remember it, none of it. I’ve tried. I’ve done everything to bring back that night into my memory, but I fail each time. My grandmother told me an intruder came in and shot my mom, but later I heard her arguing with my uncle about it. He was there that night¸ and so was my father. They told me he died in an accident a little while later, but I never believed it. When I turned thirteen I started searching the Internet for a phone number or address. I couldn’t even find a listing, so I figured they were telling me the truth. Do you know I called every single Jason Thomas in the damn phone book? I did. I asked every person who answered if they had a long lost daughter. I just wanted something to hold on to.
“The thing is, all I had left of them was a picture. It was one from when I was born. I didn’t have it on a wall or sitting on a table. I kept it at the bottom of my dresser. They were strangers to me, but I suppose I needed to hold onto something. Sometimes I can remember their faces. Its just pieces, but I can recall them being happy. I know they both loved me. Now I have nothing to remember them by.”
Knowing the trailer had burned pretty quickly, there was no chance something would have survived it. I reached over and touched her leg. “Keep the memory of them in your heart, Callie. My parents are gone too. I’m not saying I know what it’s been like for you, but I do know what it feels like to be alone.”
Out of nowhere she sat up and fell into my arms. She bawled like a lost little girl, struggling to find her way. This child had nothing to her name. She had no money saved – no place to go to find refuge. I rubbed her back. “You’re not alone, Callie. I’ll keep you safe.”
She didn’t argue or thank me. She just cried uncontrolled for a long time. I could feel my shirt become soaked, but I didn’t dare remove her. She was unhinged, grieved by demons she’d never be able to figure out. She longed to belong, and as juvenile as it sounded, I understood completely. Callie wanted a family. She deserved one.
When she finally settled down I stayed awake for a while, pondering how I could help her. In the past few days I’d gotten myself involved with two people that clearly had terrible pasts. I wished I could be the hero they needed, but nothing could replace what they’d both lost.
Then, when the room was quiet, I heard the gentle weeps of a broken man. I sat up, wanting to go to him, to offer comfort or something, anything to make the pain go away, but I didn’t. I just sat there listening to it – hearing the burdens he carried with him. Brice was lost. Sure, he was kind. He helped others. But inside he wasn’t a whole man. I think that part of him was shattered the moment he lost his wife. It was heart wrenching to listen to. I couldn’t begin to imagine what something like that felt like.
Before I finally fell asleep, I decided I would do my best at being there for them, no matter how time consuming it became. I’d show both of them that they could have friends to share special times with, instead of feeling like they were alone against the world.
I heard Brice up and about that next morning. While Callie remained asleep, I met him out on the front porch. He was sipping on a cup of coffee, enjoying the beauty around him. “Good morning.”
“How did you sleep?” He asked.
“It was okay. I stayed up for a while with Callie. She told me about her parents dying.” I shook my head. “I felt bad. She said when she was a teenager she swore her father was still alive. She said she went online and tried to look him up for an address. She called every listing under Jason Thomas and couldn’t come up with one lead. That poor girl was grasping at straws just to reach out to her daddy. It’s terrible, don’t you think?”
Brice seemed withdrawn. I looked over and noticed he was clenching his jaw while contemplating what to say. “Yeah, it’s pretty horrible. At least she had her grandparents, right? I mean, they must have taken good care of her.”
“I don’t think they did. It’s sad.”
“Yeah,” he whispered.
We stood there on the porch for several minutes without saying anything else. A part of me wondered if he was thinking of his wife. Another part of me wanted to tell him I’d heard him crying, but I didn’t think any man would own up to it, no matter how grief-stricken they might have been.
“I’m going to head out to the site of the fire today with Ross. I’m sure he’ll need to document everything in the daylight. I’ll have to board up any entrances and arrange to have the trailer removed from the site. You two can stay here for as long as you need today. I probably won’t be back until later.”
“Do you mind if I stop by?” I asked. “Callie was telling me about a picture of her parents she thinks was destroyed. It would be amazing if we could find it.”
Brice turned around wide-eyed. I couldn’t put my finger on it, but it seemed like he was in shock. “I’ll look for it. You don’t need to go anywhere near that place. It’s dangerous.”
“It’s just a trailer. How bad can it be.”
“I’ll let you know if I find something. I’ll stop by tonight. I might take a walk to the lake if you want to come.”
“Yeah,” I said after realizing he was changing the subject. “Sure, just come grab me. I’ll be home.”
“Callie should stay here if she feels safer. I don’t want that Derrick guy giving her trouble. I’m going to make sure Ross turns off his gate entry today. There’s no reason for him to have it any longer.”
When Brice went back inside I stood on the porch feeling like there was something he was keeping from me. From the day he’d met her, now to him being okay with her staying at his place, I wondered what it could be. I kept feeling like he was interested in me, but somehow there was something going on with him and the young girl too.
I wasn’t jealous, but obviously not comfortable with the situation. That’s why when I got back to my place I started digging. Callie had agreed to stay at Brice’s place, at least until we knew Derrick couldn’t get into the development. I could hear the guys banging as they worked on the trailer, at least until they could arrange for it to be hauled out. From the looks of it, the very front was almost gone, while the back frame still remained. The guys were using plywood to close off the area from the public.
I waited for my computer to boot up
and then began typing. First I was desperate to read about the death of Brice’s wife. I typed in his full name, hoping I spelled his surname correctly. Sure enough, an article pulled up on the car accident. I read it three times while tears streamed down my face. It was so sad. She was survived by her beloved husband Brice. They showed a picture of the vehicle, and it was a miracle he had survived. The mangled wreckage looked to have been smash by a machine at the junkyard. The entire top was missing.
I got so upset over it that I closed the computer and went to take a nap. It wasn’t until Brice came to the door when I awoke. I hopped off the couch and went to greet him. When I saw him standing there, shirtless, full of sweat, and tired, I pulled him inside and wrapped my arms around him. “What’s this about? I’m filthy. If you wanted to jump my bones I could have grabbed a shower first, woman.”
I pulled away and came to grips with how I’d just reacted. “Sorry. I don’t know what came over me.”
“I was wondering if I could refill my water jug.”
“Sure. Are you hungry? I’ve got lunchmeat. I could make you a sandwich.”
“Yeah, that would be nice, but only if you’ll join me.”
I made two and we sat down in the dining room, feeling the cool breeze of the window air-conditioning against our faces. I watched goose bumps raise on his bare skin as he sat across from me. It was hard to focus on eating when he was so close. “How is it going over there?”
“Everything is ruined. I looked for that photo you told me about. Everything is melted down. I’m sorry.”
It was a long shot. “Yeah, I figured.” I watched him take a huge bite of a sandwich. “So, I was online today and came across an article about your accident.” I looked into his eyes and watched something happen. He blinked a few times and dropped his food back on the paper plate.
“Why were you looking?”
I shrugged. “I just like to know the people I’m involved with that’s all.”
“I don’t like people prying into my past, Patty. If you want to know something you need to ask me.”
He wiped his face on a napkin and rose from his seat. “Thanks for lunch. I need to get back out there.”
I’d pissed him off. It was blatantly obvious. He was right. I’d been prying. Maybe I didn’t have a right to. It got me so upset that I didn’t open that computer back up to look into Callie’s life. I’d already done enough damage for the day.
Chapter 10
Brice
I’d been listening to Callie talking the night before. Her cries broke my heart. For so many reasons I knew I couldn’t go to her. She’d never understand what really happened. She’d never forgive me for it.
Then there was Patty. She was a hell of a woman, albeit she couldn’t keep out of my business. The more she pried the harder it was to act as if nothing were wrong. I had to put a stop to it, even if it meant pushing her away.
Before I’d gone over to her house for lunch I’d gone through the trailer, desperately searching for any kind of evidence that would lead people back to me. Callie had said where the item had been kept, so once I found part of it still intact, I busted through the charred remains and found it. The glass and metal frame had protected it. Seeing it brought back a lot of memories. What really put me on edge was it was the same photo I’d kept with me in prison; one of them at least.
I put the photo frame in my tool-belt figuring I could hide the evidence at my place later. Then Patty told me she’d dug into the accident.
That night I arrived home and found Callie flipping through the channels. Her cell phone was in three pieces on the kitchen countertop. She acknowledged me with a fake smile, but nothing else.
“Bad day?” I asked.
“Bad life. Obviously. I’m staying with a stranger. I’m that pathetic.”
I wished I could tell her how wrong she was. “Are you hungry? I could make us some dinner?”
“Sure. Whatever. Is Patty coming by later? Did you get Derrick’s key card deactivated?”
“I don’t know what Patty’s doing, and Ross was taking care of it. If I were you I’d stick around for one more night just to be safe.”
“You could be just as shady as he was. How do I know you won’t come into my bed and attack me while I sleep?”
I laughed out loud. If she only knew why that would never occur. “I’m not into messing around with children, Callie. No offense, but I’m old enough to be your father.” I almost choked on my own words.
“You never know. I could be the best you ever had, old man.”
I shook my head. “Do you want chicken or beef?”
Changing the subject was my best option.
“Surprise me,” she answered sarcastically.
I started cooking some chicken the way my grandmother used to make it. A little flour and egg made for a great batter. The room filled with the scent of fried chicken, and I guess Callie liked it, because she came over to sit on the other side of the counter. “I haven’t had homemade fried chicken in years,” she announced.
I shoved her a bag of potatoes. Can you slice these up real thin? We’ll make…”
“Oh my God, chips. I love them,” she interrupted.
Her mother used to make them for us. I assumed she learned from her mom, and that’s why Callie was so familiar with them. “My grandma has this slicer that made them rippled. I used to love to shake them with salt and vinegar and eat them before they cooled.”
“Yeah, me too.”
Callie got to work on the potatoes. For a second I turned around and watched her so focused on the task. This was my little girl all grown up. I knew she could have done better for herself, but I was still proud. I’d make things right, even if I had to be someone else entirely for it to happen.
I decided to play dumb with Callie, to feel her out. “So, were you close to your dad when you were little?”
“I don’t remember,” she sadly responded. “I was around five when I saw him last. I think it was during the summer though. He used to buy me dresses to wear around the house. I know he loved me, but my grandparents didn’t talk about him much. They never had pictures of him, and when I asked they just said to leave it alone. They said he wasn’t anything to write home about.”
I kept my eyes on the chicken while she continued. “It’s funny. I used to pretend my uncle was my dad. He’d try to be a good role model, but I knew the difference. How can I forget my dad’s face, but know no one could ever take his place?”
“I don’t know. Maybe it’s just something you feel?”
“Yeah, maybe. Or I could just be a dreamer. Growing up I saw my friends with their happy families. My uncle went to jail before I went into middle school. My grandparents were usually too sick to take me places. I couldn’t play spring or summer sports because they couldn’t deal with the heat or pollen. I couldn’t go out to places, because they went to bed right after dinner.”
“What about your dad’s family? Weren’t they around?”
“They’re all dead. My dad was an only child.”
“I’m sorry to hear that.”
I knew they were gone, but they hadn’t been when I was first locked up. It pissed me off she’d been kept from them.
“Sometimes I wish I had another day to spend with my parents. I feel like I’m a big let down. If they could see me now they’d be disappointed.” I could hear her sniffling. More than anything I wanted to turn around and tell her she’d never be alone again.
“Life is what you make it, Callie. You’re still young. You can do anything you put your mind to.”
She walked over beside me, handing me the sliced potatoes. “What if all I want is to have my family back?”
I couldn’t look at her. Once again she’d cornered me with a question I refused to answer. In all the years I’d planned to find her again, I’d never imagined having this type of thing happen. I was at a loss for words.
Chapter 11
Patty
Brice never showed up
to take that walk with me. I tried to call Callie but got no answer. Since I hadn’t been paying much attention to work, I threw myself into getting caught up, so I wouldn’t dwell on the fact that I knew they were together.
Had Brice gone home and found something to take his mind off of going for a walk with me? Was he still angry at me for prying? I didn’t understand.
What made things ten times worse was how much he avoided me that next morning. I know he’d seen me drive by him on my way into the office, yet he never even waved. How else was I supposed to take it other than assuming he wasn’t interested?
It took me double the amount of time to finish my daily duties because I couldn’t concentrate. By the time I made it back to the community I headed over to Brice’s cabin to confront Callie. I knocked twice before she came to the door, dressed in a tank top and short jean cutoffs. “Where have you been? I thought you’d come by last night.”
“Brice was supposed to stop by and go for a walk with me. He never showed. I figured you two were keeping each other company.”
Callie laughed at me. “Oh, you’re not thinking…um, no way. Brice is a very nice man, but we’re not into each other. Last night we ate dinner and sat up playing poker. He slept on the couch again, snored half the night away, while I stayed in the bedroom, with the door locked. You have nothing to worry about with me.”
“I wasn’t,” I lied.
“Patty, it doesn’t take a genius to see you’re interested in him.”
“I just met him this week.”
“Whatever. Anyway, if it’s all right, I’m going to get my bag and head back to your place. Brice said Derrick’s key card is deactivated. You should stay here and wait for him. I’m sure he’ll be back soon.”
I shook off the idea. “No. I’ll come with you. I think he said he’s playing cards tonight with Ross.”
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