Beneath the surface of the water, I begin to wonder: What does the future hold for me and the girl whom is now in the process of rebirth? Rebirth into a life she hasn’t chosen, nor was even aware of being destined for. Will she love me like this? Did I speed up the journey that brought us here? Should I have left her? Watched from afar? Let her live out her human life? Watched as she took another man as her own? No. I think to myself. I don’t think I could have known her and let her belong to someone else. Watching that boy with his hands wrapped around her unwilling form was bad enough. I remember the rage that had sparked through me like dark magic that night and feel my hands tense into fists.
It is from this that a hundred questions begin to haunt me just like the touches of women that came before. Women that were not her. I sigh to myself, looking down at her once more, unable to stop studying her, preserving her face in my mind in case she’s a dream.
It is with the image of her porcelain cold face filling my mind that I begin the journey to the chapel of white marble, where I shall lay her body to rest once more.
CALLIE
This stunning world, a world I had never known in life, continues to shock me, dazzle me in ways that I could never imagine. I see colour, movement, love and life all wrapped up within this body of seemingly empty depths, crystal-clear shallows, and forgotten human treasures. I now know as I journey, the orca by my side, that it is anything but. We are at the surface now in a warm bay somewhere near the Great Barrier Reef and I am watching colourful shoals of fish playfully darting in between the vast expanses of coral.
“I wish I could never leave this place … but I feel like I have to be somewhere.” I whisper wistfully as the head of the orca pops up above the bobbing surface of the frothy water.
“You do Callie. You are the vessel.” This revelation shocks me and I am suddenly sinking beneath the waves. The orca is gone. Icy water fills my lungs and I choke, trying frantically to breathe as I sink into the deep darkness of death’s grasp once more.
I open my eyes spluttering before taking in a breath of warm air; the eyes that meet me are the ones I’ve been looking for since the blade plunged into my back. Ferociously ice blue, stunning, and at this very moment of my rebirth, alight with the promise of forever.
My senses evade me: blurry colours, muffled voices and no sensation in my extremities. It is terrifying and I want to cry out, but my lips wont part. I feel like I have been lying still for hours; my limbs are heavy and weightless all at once. I am brought, oh so slowly, back to consciousness and it is then that I realize everything feels as though it is on fire. I cry out, writhing, and I feel two huge hands pushing me down. I buck, trying to sit upright, but the hands are there, ever strong, pinning me down to a cool hard surface. I writhe awkwardly, agonizingly. My throat feels as though a rabid wolf is clawing at it and my lower half is an achingly heavy mass of non-moveable flesh. I try to move, struggling in my invisible, claustrophobic prison, my eyes screwed shut. I eventually tire, laying still for the moments that follow, gritting my teeth, letting my eyes roll back into my skull, anything to stop this nightmare.
After a while, I come to the revelation of my sudden freedom as the pain evaporates as quickly as it came. My jaw relaxes and I feel the resounding ache in my teeth where I have bared down. I go limp.
The weight lifts from my shoulders as I still and the heat of the once cold surface ebbs as I relax on top of it. I breathe in and for reasons I cannot quite fathom my breath is so much cooler, deeper, and more filling than before. It feels amazing, healing even, after the pain that grasped at my lower extremities and throat. I breathe in and out and as feeling returns to me, a smile spreads across my lips slowly as I allow air to seep into my lungs. I keep smiling and open my eyes; this must be heaven, I think to myself. Breathing never felt this good before.
So many things come into focus all at once. I blink quickly, taking comfort from the dark hood of my eyelids. I dare to open my eyes again, terrified but wondering what they will reveal. I take another deep relaxing gasp of air and open them, this time keeping them that way. Everything is so clear; it is as though up to this moment I have been seeing the world through the wrong prescription lenses from a cheap optometrist’s office in a back alley of a seedy town. The world around me is glorious technicolour and I can focus like a hawk, on any part that I may choose. I see the specks of dust floating before me in a clarity that I’ve only ever seen exist on a high definition television. Then I zoom back out and look at my surroundings more clearly. I am in a large white building with a high ceiling. It appears to be a church with walls made of white marble. Sunlight, more faded than I recall ever seeing it before, is gently streaming in through the windows that contain no glass. The floor spreads out beneath where I lay, which seems to be on a table near the alter of the chapel. The table and floors are made of white marble and turquoise and blue hues bounce from ceiling to the floor. I suck in another deep cooling breath, taking in my surroundings before looking down at myself. That is when I pass out again, losing consciousness before even my head makes contact with the marble beneath me.
“Callie?” I hear the voice calling and I recognize it instantly: Orion. I open my eyes immediately. I am unable to recall why I passed out in the first place until I look down at myself and it all comes flooding back to me.
Where my legs once were lies a stunning, elegant, aqua scaled tail, alien and yet a part of me. I gasp bringing my hand up to my mouth in shocked reverence as it comes into my view again, laid against the white marble beneath me and connected to my waist as skin fades to scale. I breathe in before realizing the specks of dust I was examining were not floating in air at all. They’re in water and are not dust, but phytoplankton, shimmering in the light like miniature-jaded stars.
I clutch at my throat, recalling the tearing sensation that caused me to gasp like a fish on land, and where my once perfect white skin laid upon the muscle of my neck, three slits run parallel to one another down each side. They sting when I place a finger to each of them in turn, cringing as I do so. What must I look like? While I am preoccupied touching these unwanted gashes, a gentle and surprisingly soft hand touches my cheek, pulling my chin up so my eyes meet the stunning, frozen blue gaze that seems ablaze with the colours of sunlight, fragmented by the water, dancing on the face to which they belong.
“I’m sorry, you must be shocked. Are you okay?” The words form on Orion’s lips and travel to my ears where they are received. But how, we are underwater? Then it occurs to me. Why is he sorry? My hand flies to my chest, a thin scaly aqua line has formed in a jagged scar where the knife slit clean through me. I remember the last and first time his lips claimed mine.
What the hell is going on?! I pat my hands over my body without looking at it, too scared I’ll pass out again, running my fingers over the place where flesh turns to fish. Oh God! My legs! My legs … are gone! I try to sit up and try to move off the table, scrambling to get away from Orion. What the hell has he done to me? What the hell is happening? I knew he was bad news! Oh God I’m so stupid … I need to get back home … I need my mom. I’m hyperventilating so hard that bubbles are flurrying up from my face and as I try to get off the table to move away from Orion’s concerned expression, I tilt, losing my balance. I hit the floor with a slam, falling through the water and displacing all the sand. My TAIL, yes … TAIL … is stopping me from moving. Dammit! I drag it behind me, using my arms for leverage, looking back over my shoulder at Orion who is rushing toward me, trying to stop me from escaping.
“No! No … you stay away …” I gasp unable to find any other words to express the overwhelming terror engulfing me.
“Callie … Callie …” Orion starts, looking at me with eyes that are equally as terrified as my own. I continue to squirm along the floor, pulling myself forward slowly, scraping my stomach against the sand dusted marble. I want to cry, run, and scream. I want to be dead. Surely that was better than being trapped in a body that is weighing me down at the wais
t, trapping me in the sea? It is in the midst of this death wish that I feel something strong, something certain, clutching me from behind. I stop, the pressure calming my rabid blood, which is racing, pulsing through me to the frantic beat of my heart. It’s Orion’s arms. His voice reaches me, soothes me, and makes me collapse to the floor.
“Shh. Just breathe. Breathe for me.” Orion demands and for some reason I obey. Knowing I cannot move from under his crushing, calming weight he clutches me, holding me as my cheek rests against the floor. I breathe, in and out, in and out, over and over. Making my heart slow, my skin cool, and my mind empty.
“Good … keep breathing. I’m going to lift you. Is that okay?” He asks and I nod slowly, unsure of whether to trust him, but realising I having limited options without him.
He turns me over, rolling me into his arms and rising through the water, laying me back down on the cool marble table on which I awoke. I rest my head against his heart, feeling more vulnerable than perhaps the day I was born. He tries to remove his arms from my waist but I cling to his neck.
“Don’t go.” I plead with him, squeezing my eyes shut.
“Okay, I’m right here. I’m here for as long as you need.” He kisses the top of my forehead and I focus on my breathing, not daring to look down at myself. I feel shock resonating through me like the echo after a landslide deep beneath the earth. Instead, I choose to look back to his gaze, startled. I want to run … swim as far away as I possibly can, but his stare reassures me. Sensing the terror rising within me again his lips begin to move, transmitting sound to me in a way I cannot believe is possible.
“It wasn’t me. I didn’t stab you, I swear. I should have known others would be after you. I have enemies and I shouldn’t have put you at risk.” His eyes look sorrowed and his lips press into a thin line.
“I am the vessel.” I repeat in a whisper to myself, half dazed from my death, remembering the words the orca spoke. I understand them less now than ever.
“What?” Orion asks, his voice a welcome familiarity, deeply husky and sensually smooth like dark chocolate.
“Nothing … am I dead?” then I remember, “You stabbed me!?” I accuse angrily again my mind racing, redirecting his attention.
“No! I didn’t! As I said before, it was Azure.” He looks irritated.
“Who?”
“I’ll explain later, Callie … we really need to …” He lets go of me and I let him, finding myself momentarily as a million questions hurtle through my head.
“So am I, or am I not dead? I was murdered, wasn’t I?” I ask staring at him aggressively. He breathes out deeply rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly.
“Yes. Azure and Caedes, they surrounded us with smoke while they approached and then … I had forgotten how good she is with a blade from a distance. I should have watched the perimeter more closely.” He looks hideously guilty in this moment as his eyes fall and his mouth contorts into a slim line of distaste before continuing. “As for you being dead, you are far from it. You are more alive than you have ever been.” He smiles and cups my cheek again, looking deeply into my worried expression. “And just as beautiful as ever.” he grins leaning in to kiss me on the cheek. I blush silently and think back to the childhood I had watching Disney movies on repeat. As my anger dissipates, my heart still refuses to stop hammering against my ribcage.
“How long was I asleep for?” I pick the word ‘asleep’ not knowing whether this is true, whether I was dead or comatose instead.
“About ten and a half hours.” He replies, blinking with thick lashes. I am surprised at his answer, it felt like longer.
“What am I?” I ask, blushing a deeper red, afraid of what he will say.
“We’ve had many names, but for now let’s stick with mermaid or mer for short …” Orion breathes, bubbles rising between us in the wake of the information torpedo he has just detonated. I shake my head, still so confused, my mind racing, heart pounding.
“A mermaid?” I repeat … looking into his joyed expression as he runs his fingers through his still perfectly tousled hair. This is ridiculous, maybe I’m hallucinating.
“Yes.” He answers simply and then continues after taking a short pause. “You must have so many questions.” He acknowledges as I begin to helplessly freak out. I look down at the scales that bind my legs and make me half fish. I want to take a knife to them, freeing my legs again so I can run as far from here as possible. When did it become okay for your life to end in an instant and for you to become half the person you once were? The voices inside my head that usually calm me are screaming WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?! Yet on the outside, I can barely breathe let alone whisper a single syllable to express my terror. I look up into Orion’s steady gaze and he anchors me to sensibility. I try to keep my breathing normal and concentrate on what he is saying.
“I want to answer your questions, I do. But first I want us to move you off this table and over to those pews over there, just so you don’t seize up.”
“Seize up?” I ask, feeling fear grip at my heart once more. I find myself raising my eyebrows, trying to concentrate on not throwing up.
“Yes, the muscles you have just developed are incredibly powerful; they don’t like to sit still for long.” He answers, all business. I look down at myself, curious as to my new body.
My skin is slightly glowing, as though I’ve used a moonlight moisturizer that has made me gently luminescent from head to foot (or should I say fin). My breasts now transition from flesh to scale in a wide area around where my nipples had once resided, creating some semblance of modesty. I gawp at them as though they’re totally foreign. My gaze lowers and I notice that my stomach is unchanged, my belly button perhaps now the only sign that I was once human. Then of course, as my eyes fall further, my skin fades away and opalescent aquamarine scales bind my legs into a long shimmering tail, full of sinew and muscle. The end, where the body of the tail slits into two fins, looks delicate and it is as though someone has sewn crystals into the fibrous tissue as it sparkles madly in the dimming light. I gape, unable to take in that I am attached to something so beautiful, or so damning. Orion gives me these few moments before taking my hand and pulling me down from the table. I fear I will hit the floor.
“Just keep hold of my hands and try flexing those muscles, it’ll feel strange at first but you’ll pick it up quickly.” He reassures me, but I don’t feel very confident, I’ve always been a crappy swimmer.
“Okay. Don’t laugh, okay?” I mutter under my breath and Orion splutters, hiding a small laugh. “What did I just say?” I ask him with one raised eyebrow.
“I’m sorry; it’s just funny to me that you’re so worried about looking foolish. I am in awe of you, Callie. I would never laugh.”
“You JUST DID.” I say incredulously and he laughs again.
“Okay, okay. No more laughing at your self-consciousness. I’m sorry.” He gives me a serious look but I can tell there’s a twinkle of mischief hiding behind the glacial surface of his irises. I ignore him, concentrating on using the weight that before made me fall through the water like a brick.
Orion isn’t wrong about the muscle seizing up. It hurts for a few moments as I strain, pulling the tensile muscle together, moving my tailfin this way and that. Treading water. He holds my hands still, ready to catch me in case I lose the strength I’ve mustered so far until after a few minutes he let’s go.
“You’re a natural. Bravo.” He smiles generously but I feel pathetic. It’s like I’m learning to walk again at eighteen. Fish can do this and they have six-second memories. I got this! With my newfound determination, I hover a few inches above the white marble floor, flicking my tailfin in a way that comes naturally, just like walking. My tail itches as I flick it once, pushing my torso upright; it is powerful. Orion was right once again. I feel all the cords of muscle pulling together this way and that, and it is delicious. I do not ache any longer but feel as though movement is now effortless to me. I want to go faster so I let Orion
’s gaze slip from mine and soar upwards toward the high ceiling of the church. I glide round and round, spinning, doing barrel rolls and somersaults; surprised I feel no dizziness or fatigue.
I hear an unrestrained laugh from the floor beneath me getting louder as Orion joins me, locking me into an embrace with him. It is then for the first time that I recover some sense of observational curiosity and look down upon his body. I realize quickly as my gaze falls upon his long body that he is perhaps more gorgeous in this form than as a human. His rippling, tanned lower body has been transformed into a royal blue tail that seems to never end and his left arm still holds the single banded tattoo that looks like the waves. Around his eyes lies a mask of scales that fade from flesh in royal blue covering the bridge of his nose. The mask gives his face a mysterious and shockingly dangerous edge, while also acting as contrast, causing his pale blue irises to pop out of his face in an icy glow.
I reach up to my own face, feel the scales around my own eyes and I can’t help but wonder how I must look. Do I look as beautiful as him? Do we match now? I wonder why his hair is still so perfectly tousled even though we are under water. I reach toward him and run my hands through it, as I have desired to do for so long. It is not soft as it once felt when we were kissing on the sand, but hard and stiff as if someone has put too much hair spray into it. I run my hands through my own hair, its stiff too, heavier now that I think about it. The blonde curls I once knew are gone as it lays poker straight, falling in long and generous cascades down my back. His tail wraps around mine as he pulls my chest to his. I rest my head on his shoulder and he makes a shushing sound, running his hand down to the base of my back. My spine tingles at his touch and the water surrounding us feels a little warmer. His eyes look down into mine, but before I can let myself get lost in them, I remember I have a lot still to learn.
The Kiss That Killed Me (The Tidal Kiss Trilogy Book 1) Page 12