Seder...
“Tomorrow night is one of our biggest holidays,” Aviva told the aliens quietly.
“What do you celebrate?” asked the commander.
“I’ll tell you the story later,” she continued with unnatural calm, “and when I tell you, I will feed you the ceremonial food that all of our people eat with the Passover meal.”
“You aren’t trying to poison us to get away, are you?” asked the commander suspiciously.
“Because we have your queen in our sights!” the ensign reminded her.
“I can see that,” said Aviva. “And no, no poison. I promise. Everyone in our kingdom eats it.” Everyone except for Shulamit, but she didn’t want to get into that.
She turned to go back into the kitchen-house. “I’ll let you know when it’s ready.”
Gritting her teeth, she set to work. It would mean having to reclean the kitchen, even if it worked, but if that meant getting to be reunited with her family again, it was definitely worth it. And with a wry grin, Aviva realized that, in a way, she was glad that her kitchen would need to be scrubbed clean alongside her fellow countrymen’s. She supposed that it was only fitting that she participate in the holiday fully like everybody else.
She picked up the bag of flour and concentrated on her task.
Sometime later, Aviva emerged from the kitchen-house carrying a plate of large, square crackers. “We call this matzo,” she told the aliens.
The commander eyed the plate with interest. “What is its purpose?”
“To celebrate Passover,” said Aviva. “It’s all about freedom. And I promise it’s not poison.” To demonstrate, she picked up the top square and broke off a corner piece.
When they saw her eat, the commander and the ensign both visibly relaxed. They each took a square off the plate and took a hearty bite.
“Uggh!”
“Is this a joke?”
“What is this?”
“It’s the most important food in one of our biggest holidays,” said Aviva peacefully, a small smile on her face. Inside, she could feel her heart trying to jump out of her throat, but she hoped it wasn’t showing.
“This has no flavor!” the commander shouted.
“My mouth has never been so dry!”
“This is worse than the protein coagulants from the spaceship generator!”
“You really eat this?”
“We all do,” Aviva said calmly. “We eat it more than once. Tomorrow is Passover.”
“What about the next day?”
“That is still Passover.”
The commander and his subordinate looked at each other. One didn’t need the language boxes to read their body language, and Aviva knew her plan had worked.
“Get back in the kitchen. We’re sending you back immediately. You’re fired!” the commander barked. “Ensign, make the calculations.”
“Yes, sir!”
Aviva scampered back to the kitchen and shut the door behind her, breathing heavily.
“Sorry, Chef! I’m sorry if I’m breaking your heart,” called the ensign from the other side of the door. “But I have to follow his commands, you see. Try to console yourself.”
“Don’t worry -- I will!” Aviva called back, leaning hard against the closed door in case he tried to come inside.
There was a noise like thunder, and Aviva looked to the window. Once again she saw nighttime and palm trees. She rushed to the window and stuck her head out. The kitchen-house was restored to the palace grounds, surrounded by foliage and vegetables, just as it should be.
Pausing only to write herself a note that she needed to clean the kitchen in the morning, she hurried out of the kitchen toward Shulamit’s bedchamber.
Captain Rivka was on guard duty that night. “You’re up late,” said the warrior in a hushed tone.
“Is she safe?” Aviva’s eyes were wide, and she could barely get the words out.
Rivka’s eyes twinkled. “Why shouldn’t she be?” She gestured subtly at her sword. “But, go in and see for yourself.”
Aviva flitted inside and approached the bed. Black, curly hair covered both the pillows; Shulamit had fallen asleep in between them. Her chest rose and fell in the peace of sleep.
Safe.
Aviva waved good night to Rivka, who shut the door, and then she took a moment to scrub herself down in case stray particles of flour had hitched a ride. When she crawled into bed, Shulamit awoke just enough to snuggle into her ample curves.
“I missed you,” mumbled the little queen. She smelled of fennel seeds, which she had probably been chewing to freshen her breath just before bed.
“I missed you too,” said Aviva. “I’ll tell you in the morning, but I almost got stolen by the Pharaoh of Locusts.”
“That’s what locusts do!” Shulamit said sleepily, burrowing her face into Aviva’s neck. “How did you get them to set you free?”
“I visited upon them a plague of matzo!” said Aviva with a chuckle.
Glossary of non-English words in the Mangoverse shorts
Some of them seem like English to me, because they were a constant part of my upbringing and remain a constant in my life! But, I realize that many Gentile (non-Jewish) readers would like more information about some of those words, and likewise that not all Jewish readers share my background. It was my hope that I had incorporated them organically, so that they could be understood in context the way one would understand invented words in any other fantasy novel. But why not give people the opportunity to learn more?
The conceit of the Mangoverse is that Perach, the setting, is a Hebrew-speaking haven of tropical agriculture, and that up north, several countries away, there’s a country whose primary language is Yiddish. “Perach” itself means “flower” in Hebrew, and is a reference to Perach’s being based on South Florida, where I grew up. (Florida also means “flower”, in a way.)
What follows is an informal glossary; I don’t claim to be an expert in Judaica, but I’d like to offer what I have. Thank you to Mehek for helping me comb through the stories to find them.
Bar mitzvah—when a boy is thirteen, and in some countries when a girl is twelve (bat mitzvah; if you're wondering what word to use if you're nonbinary I think it's bnei mitzvah) there's a ceremony initiating you into the adult portions of Jewish worship.
Tanakh—Hebrew Bible. The Torah plus a bunch of other stuff.
Dybbuk—from Jewish mythology, a ghost from a soul not at rest, possessing the body of a living person.
Dayenu—this always gets translated as “it would have been enough.” The first paragraph in that part of the story is from the Haggadah, but the second one is Halleli making up her own version for personal reflection. In other words, lesbian Jewish inspie. It's possible, and for me, it's meaningful.
Haggadah—book everyone reads from on Passover that has the story of Moses and all the rituals for the order you're supposed to eat the ceremonial foods in and what prayers to say before you eat them
Pareve—our word for food that's neither meat nor dairy according to kashrut (the rules of how to eat kosher) so you can eat it with both. The box of instant mashed potato flakes in my refrigerator, for example. I could serve it with roast chicken, or I could make cheesy potatoes; the potatoes go with both. (Note that I don't keep kosher but even if I did!)
Mi Shebeirach – prayers for healing
Hinei ma tov—When Yael and her husband are singing the song about worshipping with others, this is what they're supposed to be singing if you felt inclined to YouTube it.
Aba – Dad in Hebrew (Mom is Ima.) Likewise, Baba is Dad in Farsi, although I seem to have copped out and didn't reference the Clay City people speaking a different language from the Perachis. Whoops, sorry! (If you're curious, Mom is Maman.) Princess Naomi calls her fathers Aba and Baba, which is how I imagine I'd handle their situation in real life. I know two-mom families where they use Mama and Mommy, for example.
Purim—spring holiday commemorating Esther saving he
r people. Gift baskets/charity baskets and dressing up in costume are common. There are also triangular cookies with jam inside called hamantaschen, but since Shulamit can't eat wheat and my attempts to make gluten-free hamantaschen have been disastrous, I left these out of the story.
Purimspiel—“spiel” means play in German so it probably means the same in Yiddish; one component of many Purim celebrations is to act out the story. If you're Christian you can think of this as being kind of like a Christmas pageant, although I have to confess I don't really know what I'm talking about as I've never been to a Christmas pageant!
Zayde—Grandpa in Yiddish. Grandma is Bubby (often spelled Bubbe.) Princess Naomi calls Aviva's mother Safta because that's Hebrew for Grandma, while she calls Isaac “Zayde” since that's his language.
Mitpachat—Hebrew word for a specific type of Jewish women's headcovering; the Yiddish word is tichel and that's what I call it but Aviva does not speak Yiddish. This is different from the kippah (Hebrew)/yarmulke (Yiddish) that's usually worn by men, which is a little cap held on by pins and miracles. Incidentally I did have a spoon wearing a tichel as a toy when I was a kid, but I also had store-bought toys. I think I was just trying to invent craft projects.
Kindeleh—“Child” with the diminutive -eleh added to the end. Yiddish.
Shayna maydeleh—Pretty girl, a Yiddish term of endearment.
Shabbat (or Shabbos, in Yiddish — Shabbat is Hebrew) is Friday night and Saturday morning. The Jewish Sabbath, involving compulsory rest, special food, candle-lighting, going to shul (Yiddish word for temple/synagogue which is the same as the German word for school), and supposedly, marital sex
Seder – the ritual meal associated with Pesach (Passover), a really awesome holiday about freedom and human rights and cleaning crumbs off of everything. Matzo are big square crackers that have no flavor unless you put things like chopped apples or horseradish dip on them, but fortunately, that’s built into the ritual. Yay!
Tuchuses—butts. We're getting our butts out of here! says Rivka to Isaac, who she doesn't know is Isaac.
Chag Sameach—Happy Holidays
Shira Glassman is a bisexual Jewish violinist living in Florida with a trans guy labor activist and a badly behaved calico cat. Her books, inspired by her heritage, upbringing, present life, and favorite operas, have made the finals of both the Bi Book Awards and the Golden Crown Literary Society awards in more than one year.
Shira Glassman online:
Blog: http://shiraglassman.wordpress.com
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/ShiraGlassman
Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/7234426.Shira_Glassman
Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/shiraglassman
If you liked Shira Glassman’s Tales from Perach, leaving a review is probably a mitzvah.
Check out the rest of the Mangoverse!
The Second Mango
Climbing the Date Palm
A Harvest of Ripe Figs
The Olive Conspiracy
Tales from Perach/Tales from Outer Lands
Looking for excellent f/f fiction?
Check out:
Daughter of Mystery by Heather Rose Jones
Poppy Jenkins by Clare Ashton
Trans lit by trans authors:
A Boy Called Cin by Cecil Wilde
Black Art by VT Davy
A Safe Girl to Love by Casey Plett
If you’re not ready to leave the tropics yet, try Zen Cho’s Spirits Abroad
For more Jewish fantasy, try Helene Wecker’s The Golem and the Jinni
Tales from Perach (Mangoverse Book 5) Page 11