Feechi wanted to shrivel where she stood, but it wouldn't have helped anything and Carsten's amusement only made things worse. He patted the seat and then crooked his finger at her.
She sat, exhaling on a sigh. "I'm sorry, but my sister … "
"You worry too much and you don't need to apologize."
She let out a self-conscious giggle. "Between Dee and Jack, I don't know which one is worse. Sometimes I think I'm raising two kids."
Carsten dropped his hand on top of hers, still smiling. "And like I said, you don't need to say you're sorry."
A little uncomfortable, Feechi pulled her hand away and looked at the television which nobody had been watching since Carsten turned it on.
"What's wrong?" he asked.
"Nothing really, but I'm still not comfortable seeing you on the weekend and then having to work with you tomorrow."
"We haven't done anything that would make you feel guilty, so what's the problem?"
"I guess I'm just not okay with fraternizing with the boss."
"If it makes you feel better, you need to remember we haven't committed to a relationship or anything."
His light tone forced her to look at him and she cut her eyes and sniffed, hoping he'd get the message.
He tugged at her hair. "So you're upset with me now?"
"You're taking this thing way too lightly."
His smile widened. "This thing you're talking about, what is it exactly?"
"You're not a fool." She sucked her lip into her mouth and wondered if she should simply be honest. At worst, he could deny the truth and make her feel like an idiot or he could admit to what she was about to say.
Having pulled in a deep breath, she continued with her explanation. "You like me a whole lot more than you're saying and … " The rest of what she wanted to express got stuck in her throat and she cleared it to give herself time to work on her composure.
"And … " Carsten prompted. "I know you're not gonna stop there."
"You're right," she said, sitting up straight. "I … I also feel more for you than I've admitted."
"You say that as if there's something detrimental about it."
She shot him a glare that dared him to contradict her. "You keep forgetting that I work for you."
He shrugged and spread his hands. "Business and pleasure ultimately don't mix, but think about the couples who own their businesses and work together."
"That's different, as you well know. We're something else. All of this is so new."
"And like I've said before, you worry too much."
"But what if—"
Carsten laid a finger over her lips. "Trust me. Your work speaks for itself and I'd never put your job in jeopardy because of anything personal between us."
"But didn't you say … "
Carsten put his head back and let laughter pour out of him. When he finished, he tapped her chin. "Yes, I did say some things and no, I won't go back on my word. Things will change only when the time is right, so relax."
Feechi wasn't one hundred per cent certain what he meant, but guessed he was saying he'd be patient for now.
Wearing a mysterious smile, Carsten leaned toward her and kissed her cheek.
Taken by surprise she gasped, absorbing his scent at the same time. Even at the end of the day he smelled good. Her thoughts were cut short by Dee who wandered back into the room with a plate, fork and a generous helping of pound cake. She crashed in the sofa closest to them, gesturing with her fork. "Carsten, you can come bearing cake any time, you hear?"
Rubbing his belly, Jack added, "You should have some of the chicken sandwich. Roast chicken."
"Now he tells me."
Feechi wondered if Carsten didn't have anywhere else to be and bit down on her bottom lip to hold in her smile. She remembered wondering the same thing when he'd been there before.
At her feet, Max was licking his face as if he'd just had a delicacy. A sharp glare in her sister's direction confirmed what she already knew.
"Dee, don't feed the dog any cake."
"I don't see why he can't have a treat too."
Before she spoke again, Feechi glanced at Carsten and decided not to say another word. Luckily for her, he stirred and folded his hands together.
"It's time for me to get moving."
Feechi stood at the same time he did. "Thanks for taking us with you today. We both enjoyed the trip."
"You know that's no problem."
She turned to find Dee sucking the fork and watching them as if she'd discovered something weird, yet wonderful.
"What's the matter?" Feechi asked.
Dee put on an analytical, yet sly expression. "Nothing. Well, actually, I was thinking you guys look great together."
"That's good to know," Feechi said, shaking her head.
Carsten grinned at her reaction and took her hand. "Catch you some time, Dee. Jack, I'll see you soon."
"Bye, Uncle Carsten."
Jack got to his feet and Max did the same, but Dee held on to her nephew's arm. "Give Mommy and Uncle some privacy, okay?"
Feechi walked out of the house with Carsten behind her and before he stepped off the verandah, he ran one finger down her cheek and brought his face close to hers.
It was all kinds of wrong to be kissing her boss, but she shoved the thought away. Her eyes closed, and Carsten left a soft kiss on her lips. "Thanks again."
She wanted more, so much more but her lids flicked open and she shook her head. "No, thank you."
With one thumb, he stroked her cheek. Then he released her and climbed into the van. Before pulling away from the sidewalk, he tooted the horn and returned her wave.
For a while, she stood by the grille wondering why the good things in life always came along at the most awkward times.
Chapter 13
The sun outside the window beckoned to Feechi. She opened the blinds and stood looking at the street below. It wasn't quite lunchtime, but she was a little peckish. Some coffee would come in handy and warm her blood, as well. The low setting on the air conditioning had taken some getting used to, but even now she had to get up and move around every so often to keep her blood circulating.
She turned away from the street, walked out of the office and down the hallway to the kitchenette. It served as a breakroom and held up to six persons at a time. Her hand was on the half open door when she heard her name. She stood still, knowing what was coming would upset her.
" … in Carsten's van and they were headed out of town."
"Maybe it has to do with real estate, viewing a property or something."
"Are you for real? You don't see how friendly they are with each other?"
"Come on, Carsten is on good terms with everybody."
"Well, I've watched him with her and there's something going on between them, believe you me."
"You see too much for your own good."
"Whatever you say, but I bet that's how she got the job. He's probably doing her a favor because he likes her or maybe they're sleeping together."
"You shouldn't jump to conclusions, especially since he's never messed with anyone working here."
"Mark my words, just watch and see if there isn't something going on between them."
Feechi couldn't decide whether to walk through the door or run away. This was exactly what she'd been trying to avoid by not getting friendly with Carsten. She wanted to be taken on her own merit and up until now, she thought she'd succeeded at that. The decision on what to do was taken from her in the next breath.
The door opened, almost hitting her in the face. Two of the women from the real estate division walked out of the room, forcing Feechi to take a step back.
Beyond tightening her lips, the first woman didn't give any reaction other that a slight widening of the eyes and a faint smirk. Something told Feechi that one had been doing the talking because the second woman lowered her gaze, as if she were guilty.
The hot glare Feechi put on her would have left her in no doubt
that she'd heard them. Muttering, she stalked into the break room but didn't have the luxury of saying what was on her lips because a third person was inside.
The receptionist shot to her feet at the sight of Feechi. Her goggle eyes gave Feechi the impression that if she'd said a word, the woman would have fainted out of shock.
Other than skewering her with a look and stalking past her to the cupboard, Feechi did nothing. A second or so after the receptionist fled, Feechi's shoulders slumped and she dropped into the chair the other woman had vacated.
So much for thinking they'd have been safe on the weekend. From the spite in that woman's voice, it would be only a matter of time before Feechi's name was spread on the entire floor and her reputation ruined.
She hadn't seen Carsten on Monday and was relieved about that, but now she needed to see him. What she wanted to say became a jumble in her mind, but she had to get it out. The fact was, she was stuck in this job. She'd been foolish to give up the security of her old job, but Carsten's generosity had been too much to resist.
Add to that, her need for a security blanket and she was in a sticky situation. Money wasn't always everything and she should have thought about that before jumping ship and landing in a quagmire she didn't know how to handle.
As she spooned coffee into a foam cup and added hot water, Feechi gave herself a pep talk to prevent herself from sliding into depression.
It wasn't as if she'd taken a step down. She'd stepped up in every way that mattered. She wouldn't have to skimp to buy Jack the presents he deserved at Christmas and though she was still reluctant to keep Max, she didn’t have to worry about paying for his next overpriced bag of dog food.
She added condensed milk to the coffee, dropped the plastic spoon in the garbage and grabbed the door handle. It turned from the other side and she let it go.
The door opened and the man on her mind stood in the doorway. His long-sleeve shirt and navy pants were far removed from his casual get-up on the weekend, but his appreciative half-smile was anything but businesslike.
"Carsten, I was just thinking about you."
He hiked one of his eyebrows in a question as a mischievous light filled his eyes. "Really? Tell me more."
A grin covered her face until she remembered she was supposed to be having a serious talk with him.
"Can you come to my office?"
"I was looking for you, so that's a yes."
"Why?"
Her harsh tone registered when he frowned.
"Everything all right?" he asked.
She grunted yes and lowered her gaze to the cup in her hand, cursing herself for lying since he'd know what was up with her in a minute.
He stepped aside and she was all too aware of him walking behind her and that he now suspected something had gone wrong.
Inside her office, she invited him to sit, which he did after she got behind the desk and took her seat.
He waited while she sipped coffee to bolster her courage and after fidgeting with the cup, she raised her gaze to his. "It's about us."
A small smile came to his face, but his humor disappeared a second later when she didn't return his gesture.
"I don’t think we should continue to socialize with each other."
In the silence that settled, the clock ticked, the computer hummed and her breathing hitched. When she started speaking to break the tense atmosphere, Carsten also spoke.
"What exactly has brought this on?"
"Some women were talking in the kitchen before I got there."
He said nothing, but his questioning gaze prompted her to explain. "They were talking about us."
"What did they say to offend you?"
"That we had something going on and that I had probably slept with you to get this job."
"And did you?"
She flared her nostrils, but didn't say the first thing that came to her lips. "We both know I didn’t."
"So why does it matter?"
Had he lost his mind?
"You're a man, so you probably don't understand what's at work here. It's all right for a guy when people say this sort of thing, but it doesn't work that way when you're a woman."
"Why would you assume it's any different for a man?"
"Nobody is going to assume you're a slut. People just think you're the man and that you're just taking what's offered on a platter."
"But you and I know the truth."
"It doesn't protect me from gossip."
"Why does it matter?"
"If you don't understand why it does then you're not as smart as I believe you are."
His lips curled in a wry smile, and although Feechi was deadly serious, she gave him a similar response. No doubt, he remembered her using the same words to him before she'd started working for him.
"Okay, I take that back," he said, "but all I was saying is that if you know the truth, then people's opinions shouldn't matter."
"My reputation is all I have, so it matters to me."
"And I understand that from a professional point of view."
"I don't want people talking about me because of our … " Her brows wrinkled while she tried to find the right word.
Arms folded, he waited for what she'd say next.
"Association. I care what—"
"I get that. So you're saying we can't see each other even if I invite you on a perfectly legitimate trip that has to do with the job?"
"I'd feel more comfortable if we don't take any more trips together."
He stared at her as if trying to make sense of something she'd said in a foreign language.
"I'm supposed to deprive myself of your company because you can't stand having a few people talk about you?"
"When you put it that way, it sounds personal."
"It is." He leaned forward and made her wait for what was coming next.
She licked her lips as she stared into his eyes.
When he spoke, she missed what he said.
She narrowed her eyes and shook her head, waiting for him to repeat his words.
He enunciated his words as if she were deaf. "I said no."
"What?"
He smirked, puzzling her no end.
"What d'you mean no?"
"Exactly what I said."
She turned her head away to prevent him from seeing how much she wanted to slap him. "But you promised."
"I remember exactly what I said, that you're not ready for anything."
Feechi closed her eyes and then, taking slow breaths, focused on him. "You're changing the rules of the game and that's not fair."
"Nothing in life is fair, Feechi. You have to fight for what you want."
"I don't want anything."
"That's the problem right there. You've convinced yourself that you can live in a vacuum."
"Carsten, you're being really weird and I don't want to deal with this now."
"Fine, but at some point you'll have to face reality."
She got to her feet, a hint for him to go. "And that is?"
"You have to take risks if you want to win big."
"I'm not into gambling."
"And I'm not going to let you ignore me forever."
She stuck her thumbnail into her mouth, frowning at him.
"What's gotten into you between Saturday and today?"
"Nothing that wasn't there before." He shrugged. "I simply decided you're a risk worth taking."
"And I like things safe, so that's not going to work." She walked to the door and stood looking at the side of his face. "Why did you come to see me?"
"I wanted to ask if everything is in place for the auction."
"You know it is." She sighed and looked at her pumps. "With respect, Carsten, I'm going to ask you to leave."
He got up and stood with his back to her. "I'm sorry to change the rules of the game in the middle, but I've been thinking hard since Saturday."
He turned to face her, running a hand over his hair. "I'm not going to pressure you into doing anyt
hing you don't want to do, so I'll give you some space, but know I'm not giving up on you."
Hands to her hips, Feechi gaped as he walked past her without breaking his stride.
While his footsteps echoed on the tiles, Feechi wondered if Carsten had gone mad in the two days she hadn't seen him.
Chapter 14
Hours later, Feechi was no clearer on what had happened in her office with Carsten. No matter which way she looked at it, the man had taken leave of his senses.
Across the dining table, Dee studied her. "I can tell your mind is far away."
"Yours would be too if you had someone do a three hundred and sixty degree turn on you."
"Want to tell me about it?"
Feechi put her fork down and met Dee's eyes. "It's Carsten."
Grinning from ear to ear, Dee said, "Now, more than ever, you have to tell me what's going on between you two."
"I don't understand him."
"And when has any woman every totally understood any man?"
"This isn't the time for jokes."
"Who said I was joking? I don't know much about him, but at first glance I know he isn't a simple man by any stretch of the imagination."
"Which is why I knew it was a mistake to get involved with him."
"Technically, Sis, from what you've told me you are not involved with him."
"He wants to change that though."
"And what's wrong with that? He likes you. You like him. You could finally break out of that cocoon you're in and live a little bit."
The volume on the television edged up a bit, which was usually a sign that Jack was enjoying whatever he was watching.
Going on automatic, Feechi yelled. "Turn it down, Jack."
The only response was a sharp bark from Max and a nominal lessening of the sound level.
"A little more, Jack!"
The sound inched downward again, and Feechi shook her head. "That child is something else."
Dee kicked Feechi gently under the table to get her attention. "So what exactly is Carsten up to that's so wrong?"
"He came to see me today."
Dee moved both hands in circles to get Feechi talking faster.
Sold!: A Holiday Romance Page 9