“Well, we all need a little “girl time” here and there, don’t we?” Paula asks, smiling at Aimes and me.
I smile back, thinking how very disappointed she would be to discover the truth. Unless everyone in this place was such a saint like Shelia and would agree to our slut-like status. If so, my vote is to haul it out of here quickly before Aimes and I are stoned in the courtyard.
“You two must be what has this place buzzing. Normally it’s pretty boring around here. The joys of everyone knowing every- thing about everyone, I guess.” Paula smiles with a hint of mis- chief like a gossiping housewife, still laying out the many plates and silverware.
“As awe-inspiring as we are, I don’t think we can take all the credit. Majority, sure. I hear we are quite the naughty girls,” Aimes nonchalantly replies. She is letting our past conversation color this one, looking to Shelia with a shared smile.
“I too heard something along those lines.” Paula still wears her smile of a secret knowledge.
I think “girl time” may have just gotten interesting.
Before I can ask the reason behind her smile, a familiar whistle cuts through the air. It startles both Shelia and Paula, but Aimes and I just groan. We know that sound. It’s our shock collar of a calling. We are being summoned. Paula gets to keep her secrets for a little longer.
Aimes returns the whistle, as we are trained to do, with an impressive eye roll. Rhett’s tall frame enters through the doorway following the sound and he is missing his normal mischievous smile. That does not bode well for us. Wordlessly holding the door open with his body, he waits for us and like children being caught in the act of doing something wrong, we walk over to him to be told what our punishment will be.
“J.D. wants everyone upstairs. We have been looking for you two for a good while now. Caused a bit of concern,” Rhett says with his lowered voice, due to the two women in the room who are pretending to not listen.
Paula is better at it, humming to herself with her chores. Shelia’s glances are giving her away as she pretends the paper in her hand is very interesting.
“We weren’t aware we had a curfew.” Aimes does not hide her unhappiness using her voice and her posture to let the tall man fully understand how little she cares what J.D. wants.
“I know there has been a lot of crap back-and-forth, but it would be best to put on that pretty smile of yours when we go up there. It has not been a fun morning for any of us so far.” His voice is almost a growl with the emotion it carries.
I shiver with it. I have forgotten what this man can become, and I wonder what has happened while we were away. Who did Daddy punish now?
“Chapel?” I ask, becoming aware he has been alone with their group all morning while we were able to escape.
“What about him?” Rhett looks at me, answering my question with more than just his tone.
Chapel has continued to stand his ground against J.D. and the rest of them. The only real question left is doing he stand alone or did one of them finally slip rank? Are the rest of them growing weary of these games as we are?
Rhett’s tone tells me it may be so as everyone is slowly becoming a target for J.D. with his misplaced rage over the current situation. It does not send me into shivers of delight looking forward to whatever is waiting for us upstairs. Paula is right. What does a girl have to do to get some serious “girl time” around here?
Chapter 28
“I think we should stay,” a voice breaks the tension.
Marxx is the first to speak after we have been told why we were all summoned to the room serving as the men’s apartment.
J.D. feels he has humored us long enough with his conceding to our idea of coming here. Now he is ready to take his control back. Each man in the room stands a good distance apart. J.D. and Lawless are standing in the center of the room across from Rhett and Marxx. Chapel is sitting to the side on one of the cots still unmade from the night before. The tension in the room can be felt from all angles with no one looking at another. I only have guesses as to what has happened within their happy little men’s club while we were away, and I am trying not to smile with my thoughts.
“It’s a nice set up. Just from a defensive state alone. There are no outside windows on the bottom floor for Risen to break into. There are only two doors from the bottom floor to enter the stairwell. One has been welded shut. The other bonus is the courtyard, which is always being watched from the floor above. Other than that, we are surrounded by thick walls and many windows making it impossible for anything to go unnoticed,” Rhett offers solid reasons to help to point out why J.D. should agree with Marxx.
“Simon already said our help would be welcomed in keeping it secure. We get to keep our weapons and not sit around all day taking orders from them,” Marxx says. He knows our leader well and he is pushing the right buttons to get J.D. to join the conversation.
J.D., who until now has been staring blindly at the floor, looks up at what was spoken. Rhett tries to hide his smile as Marxx’ words hit home.
“I ain’t taking no orders from any Democrat and his sidekicks.”
J.D. lets his tone express his thoughts perfectly.
“Won’t have to. He said we could do our own thing as long as we agree to not stir up anything,” Lawless finally speaks hearing J.D.’s voice.
I wonder if he will roll over next; maybe shake. Play dead would be just as amusing.
Aimes and I sit silently, watching them trying to talk J.D. into the shared opinion of the group. We are as close to the door as possible so we may leave as soon as we can. We know our thoughts have no real value here with this discussion. Nothing we say will hold any sway over the final judgment of what they do.
J.D. did not want us here for that. He just wanted to prove to us, and to them, we will still come when called. Maybe we should be the ones learning to shake. We seem to have roll over down well enough.
“This what you really want?” J.D. asks the room. His tone is soft, almost cautious, as if he is afraid to hear our answer. The exposed weakness takes us all by surprise for a moment, pulling our attention to the man in the center of our storm.
Rhett looks in my direction to see if I am seeing it. If I can see the cracks forming in the man, we all think of as our strength.
There is a sadness about Rhett as he looks at me, an almost pleading in his eyes for my help. He is lost with the many divisions now forming within our group. He is desperately looking for us all to start again and to forget the words and actions that have been done. He wants this new place to be the start of our family bond and laughter again as the cabin was supposed to have been. Our brave and ruthless Rhett is shrouded in doubt and remorse. I do not know how to tell him I don’t think I have the maturity to fix us.
“Yeah, it is.” Aimes is the only one to speak up and all eyes rest on her as she says, “At least, it’s what I want. You can stay or go if you please, but I am staying here.”
Rhett closes those sad eyes knowing the damage her words have done.
“And you, Barbie?” J.D. asks. “Where do you stand?”
“Here. I am tired. I want a “home” again,” I answer him, letting my voice try to take some of the sting from her words. “Don’t you?”
I can feel Aimes’ body shift with my soft tone for the man. In her mind, the lines are still drawn, but she was not the one watching Rhett being broken from the weight of it. She does not see Marxx withdrawing further into his shadow with every moment passing. She cannot see the scars Chapel is now wearing as he fights for us. Nor does she see the light fade from Lawless’ eyes. She does not see all the steel hearts rusting before us. I do.
J.D. stares at me with his silent resolve. Our eyes meet across the great divide we have created and for a moment I am taken back to days that now seem to be years ago where he was the father I needed and I was the daughter he craved. Just as quickly as those feelings return, I watch them slip away.
“No,” J.D. says and now I can hear them slipping awa
y. His voice fills the room with the finality of the word. Like a black casket closing, the hope the men were holding is buried.
One single word, and the room falls back into the darkness. Every man inhales, pulling the armor tight around his soul again.
The small glimpses they had spared me are now a thing of the past as the battle rages on.
I know now no matter what the cost is to them, they will stand by this man. They do not know how to do anything else. The men I once found so brave and strong now seem pathetic to me. The pity I felt for them only moments ago fades at their refusal to stand on their own, allowing J.D. to break them down with his stubbornness. I am just as upset at J.D. for breaking what he is supposed to protect.
“Well then, I guess you five remember where the door is?” I ask, letting my words chill the room with my lack of concern for them now.
I meet each of their eyes as they look at me. Even the ones be- longing to the man I once sought to guide me through the dark- ness of my nightmares. Only blank eyes stare back at me from behind their well-constructed walls.
“Not five,” Chapel says, with his head down. He stands with a deep inhale of his breath repeating what he has said, “Not five.” “Can’t say I’m surprised.” J.D. attempts to taunt Chapel with his sneer.
“Me either,” Chapel lashes back, with just as much disgust for not only J.D., but the others as well. “It must be unnerving to see the girls with more courage than us. It’s our job to keep them safe. It’s always been our job. Now you’ve each turned your back on them for this man and a quick lay? Whatever happens next, it’s on you. Never forget that.” Chapel is staring at Lawless as he opens the door for Aimes and myself. “Come on,” he says, never taking his eyes from the men in the room as we exit.
“Peace!” Aimes says, walking past Chapel.
Her voice is deceptively strong. Her brave face is only one layer deep and she rushes out of the room before the layer can be stripped from her. All the anger she was holding like a bonfire inside of her is losing its heat against the truth of what is happening to us as the leaf-covered hills flash back to my mind. We craved the fire and now we are burning from the spark we stirred.
I stand still, leaning against the wall where I have been watching this whole time. J.D. is losing the battle of his blank stare and I watch it unfold on his face like a silent movie. Those cold, steel-colored eyes are swimming in a sea of his own making as he now swims on the edge of his darkest emotions. Each of us is crumbling from his actions and he knows it. The world he has built is turning its back on him, but he is either too weak or too strong to stop it.
“Call a vote,” I say to the room, and it is the last life preserver I will throw them.
J.D. reclaims his face with the knowledge of what I have just done. Demanding a vote is only done when making it deadly clear voices are not being heard and J.D. will now have to stand behind the decision it lands on if the men back the decision.
It’s a direct insult to his leadership. Because of that, no one has dared called one in some time. Throw in the fact a woman has called one and it is gasoline to the fire of his pride. As much as a part of them as Aimes and I are, we are just as much not. I haven’t forgotten that fact. I am just not willing to let the fire win.
I know with this; the divide just grew between us by miles. The look in his eyes confirms it. The shock on the men’s faces seals it. Damned if I do….
Aimes and Chapel both stare at me with disbelief. I could have walked out with them, closing the door forever on all of this. I was inches from my freedom, but instead I retied the noose. This dead horse is not only getting heavy, but it is also starting to stink. “We stay.” Chapel is the first to start, stealing the room’s silence with his vote. He has backed the decision for a vote to be called when he spoke. The wheels on the bus go round and round as it heads my way.
“Stay.” Aimes takes up the chant while still staring at me with her disbelief.
“Stay,” I say, with a cold voice. I know this is the last chance for our family and I am preparing my heart to close another door of another room. If the vote does not go in our favor, they will be lost to me forever with what I have just done.
“Stay,” Rhett answers, keeping his face blank and turned away from J.D.
“Stay.” Marxx’ deep gravel voice is strong with his decision and he stares at J.D. with the full force of himself.
“Stay.” Lawless is the last to vote after a long pause. His head is down, pulling his shoulders in with the knowledge of what his vote may cost him and what it could have lost him if he chose the other option.
J.D. is silent. Anger rides his body and I am the focus of it, but there is a different flavor to this anger. I know this man well. Every motion he has ever made, I have memorized like a melody out of fear of him. Now these lyrics are singing to me with a new song.
“See you at dinner,” I tell him. I keep this new song to myself. It is a private tune to hum another day. A day I know will be here soon.
“I can’t believe you did that!” Aimes says to me after the three of us have left the room. “I don’t know if I should hi-five your hand or the back of your head!”
“The back of her head,” Chapel offers to help her solve her debate. He is always so helpful like that.
“It will be fine,” I answer them both, keeping what I saw in J.D.’s face close to me.
“I am thinking we should have let Rhett choose the other name for you instead of Zombie Barbie.” Aimes stomps with her walking, still irked with me at what I potentially risked stepping so far over our unspoken line.
“Which one was that?” I ask, with mild curiosity.
“Wonder Bitch. As in, I wonder what the bitch was thinking!” she says with complete honesty.
Oh, that Rhett, always a charmer.
Chapter 29
Aimes and I had offered to help Paula with dinner, but upon discovering the tornado Aimes is in the kitchen, we were politely asked to stop. If polite is Chapel picking Aimes up and placing her on the counter, threatening her with harm if she moves, then yes, it was a very polite request. Aimes’ response, not so much.
Chapel surprises all of us with his culinary skills. The man is a Betty Crocker in an apron, making Paula smile her warm smile the whole time with his knowledge and his eagerness to help her. Chapel was made for moments like these. He is a “home and hearth” guy to the bone and he returns her smiles with his own. Soon the two of them have completely forgotten us amid our hidden giggles and whispered comments. We sneak from the room before our laughter gets the best of us.
“Do you think there are really that many types of whisks or were they totally going sexy-top-secret-kitchen-code?” Aimes asks, her eyes dancing with the thought.
“It scares me you are excited about the possibility. Can you even imagine Chapel…,” I leave the sentence dangling, unable to form the words to finish it? We are both lost in a mixture of morbid curiosity and avoidance of the idea and our faces exchange the concept with bursts of expressions.
We are lounging on a bench in the courtyard amid the many metal drums being turned into bonfires for light. The many fires give off enough heat to keep the winter winds at bay. The sur- rounded courtyard keeps the fires from being seen and exposing us to anything in the darkness beyond. It is a nice touch. It pushes the darkness away and lets the many people mingling around enjoy the space before the weather keeps so many confined inside. “Hey, I was just asking about their secret sexy code talk. You are the one that went all hardcore porn viewing on us,” Aimes says, feigning innocence and twirling a bright pink streak of her hair. “Who’s viewing hardcore porn?”
We both jump at the male voice, almost spilling us off the cement bench. I am glad at this moment there is not a raised window around us with the amount of grace we hold.
Dolph is standing behind the man who was sitting at their table this morning. He is close enough to the flames so I can see him, but deep enough in the darkness to keep his face
masked with the dancing flame’s shadows. The new man is not as shy, standing proudly as he smirks down at our ungraceful ways.
“Sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you. At least, not that well.” He smiles and I hear Aimes inhale beside me with it. Come into my parlor said the spider to the fly. His smile draws her in with the same welcome mat.
“I’m Richard,” he says to us, almost feeling embarrassed and shy by our silent stares. “I believe we met this morning? You’re wearing my bra.”
I smile, remembering him and send a wave to Dolph standing behind Richard. It is met with the same signature head nod we have seen from him over and over again. I wonder if he ever gets a cramp from repeating that motion so often.
“So where is the porn?” Richard pushes through the stalemate of a conversation attempt, still wearing an amused smile. Richard should have picked a better partner if he had hopes Dolph would help steer this ship.
Richard’s voice is soft. Soft in a way of wanting to hear him sing you to sleep at night. Soft in a way you desire to hear him whisper words in the dark of the night against your flesh. His short cut curly hair is the color of sunsets with its warm red and orange glow. His full beard is trimmed close, holding the same coloring as his hair. He wears his smile with ease upon his friendly face as his mirth-filled eyes watch us. They catch the light of the flames, reflecting their warmth back at us. Other than their similar body shape of well-toned workings, he and Dolph have very little in common.
Richard seems warm and inviting where Dolph is shy and cautious. Richard has already spoken more words to us than I believe Dolph has our entire time here. I wonder if Aimes and I are so different or does Dolph have a different side he keeps hidden from those he has not deemed worthy of his trust?
Dawning (The Risen Series Book 1) Page 21