by Wendy Louise
Random hook-ups are his thing.
With a deep cleansing breath I turn off the movie and head to my room. I try to shake my thoughts of Ethan and what just happened. I need to stick to my guns. I need to keep this at a friendship level, it will never work any other way, and I can’t stuff up things at work.
A warm shower and bed is what I need.
Cold Showers
I really need a cold shower. The coldest fucking shower I can stand!
I don’t know what possessed me to just leave her there like that. I was on a roll; things were progressing to a point where I could have had her right then. Something stopped me dead in my tracks. That has never happened to me before. I knew that I didn’t want to screw her tonight. It just didn’t feel right. But it is more than that. Something inside told me to slow the fuck down, my conscience maybe, I don’t know.
Fuck!
Since when do I listen to anything but my body when it comes to girls?
I tear off my clothes as I head in to my bathroom, and turn on the water full blast. As I step under the shower head I realise that this girl is under my skin, in a way that no one else has been before. I don’t understand how that can happen after such a short period of time. It’s not normal.
I either have to respect her wishes and keep my distance, or I need to explore this further and see where I can take it. All I really know is that she is not the type of girl that I can have my way with and leave for dead. Tonight proved that to me. I just don’t know which way to move forward from here.
Jesus, my head is about to implode!
In truth, maybe the decision is not mine to make. Maybe it’s hers and I need to leave the ball in her court. I’m not sure that I’m in the right frame of mind to make any decisions regarding Ava Lucas. She’s worked some pretty powerful magic on me and I don’t understand what it is. All I know is that I have never been this confused over a girl before.
Ever.
She’s had an ideal upbringing - loving family, beautiful home and stability. What can my fucked up existence offer her? I’ve never known any of that. I don’t know the first thing about being in a stable, loving relationship, and it’s never been on my radar to consider it before.
I turn the water to the coldest temperature I can stand and try my best to scrub all thoughts of her from my head.
Unsuccessfully.
Grayson wakes me the next morning calling my cell phone. I lean across the mountain of pillows on my bed to take my phone off the bedside charger.
I swipe the screen to take the call.
“Hey Man. Can I come by? I feel like shooting some hoops?” he asks brightly.
I have a full size basketball court on the property. Gray and I often shoot hoops out there and catch up. It’s a hell of a workout too.
“Sure. Come by now. I’ll get up.” I glance at the clock which tells me it is already nine o’clock. I’ve slept in. Thank god I don’t have to be at the Studio until noon today.
I climb out of bed and pull on a pair of black basketball shorts and a grey t-shirt both of which are perfectly pressed, thanks to our Housekeeper. As I’m tying the laces of my gym shoes my mother walks in to my room.
She’s dressed impeccably as always in white linen pants, and a white linen shirt. Her black belt and matching heels reek of money. Her long blonde hair is pulled back in to a bun and her make-up, as always, is flawless. She has obviously had the hair and make-up team over this morning. That means she’s on her way somewhere. She’s not one to miss a photo opportunity if there is one to be had.
“Good Morning Ethan darling,” she says as she bends and plants a sticky kiss on each cheek. She wears way too much gloss on her lips, and each kiss feels like her lips are stuck to me with glue.
“Good Morning Mother,” I reply. “To what do I owe the pleasure of your visit this morning?”
There is a sarcastic edge to my voice. I catch it and so does she, but hey, she never comes to my room unless she is after something from me.
“No need to be so icy dear,” she says. “I thought maybe we could have lunch together today at the Ivy. My treat of course.” She shrugs and smiles showing her perfectly whitened, orthodontically-enhanced teeth.
Here we go.
The only reason anyone goes to the Ivy for lunch is to be photographed. It’s a well- known restaurant frequented by celebrities and swarmed by paparazzi. Mommy Dearest must have an ulterior motive for lunch.
“Can’t.” I say simply. “I’m due at the Studio at noon today.”
“Dinner?” she suggests in her sing-song voice.
I shake my head. “Sorry, plans.”
I don’t have any plans for dinner, but I’ll be damned if I’m going to play in to my mother’s hands and be made a pawn in one of her little publicity stunts again. I’m done with that.
My mother looks at me with her head cocked to the side. “Ethan, my publicist thinks it would be good if some photos of the two of us together got out there. We haven’t been photographed together for a while and you’re on the verge of something big darling.” She places her well-manicured hand on to her hip and pops it to the side in her signature pose.
Even though this is what my mother does, and even though it has been like this all my life, it still hurts like hell whenever she does it. She’s always treated me as a possession. Something to use to further her career. It makes sense that now that mine is about to take off, she wants a piece of that too. I shake off the feeling that I have in the pit of my stomach and stand to face her.
There’s no point in arguing with her or getting upset. I’ve tried that over the years and it doesn’t work. I just treat her with the same indifference that she treats me and I get through it.
“Sorry Mother, no can do. I need to go. Grayson is on his way over and we’re going out to shoot some hoops.” I turn my back and head towards my bathroom to clean my teeth.
She sighs loudly, and then I hear her heels clicking on the marble floor as she heads back down the hallway.
Is it wrong of me to want a normal mom who asks about my day, and shows interest in what I’ve been up to? I would love to be able to ask her advice about things and have normal conversations. Instead I’m left with a mother who just wants to use me for her own glory. No wonder my emotions are screwed up.
I head out to the court at the back corner of the garden just as I see Grayson’s Mustang pull up in front of the garage. He puts his aviators on and heads toward me, basketball tucked under his arm.
“Morning,” he says as he grabs my hand fist to fist, elbows bent down. That’s always been our handshake, since we were kids, no need to stop now.
“Hey,” I say. “What’s new?”
“Lots and Nothing.” He says in his signature way.
We both head out to the court and start to bounce the ball around. The sun is shining brightly this morning, and I can already feel a light sheen of sweat layering my skin.
“What’s up with you?” Gray says after a few minutes.
I stop dribbling the ball and take a shot. “Nothing, just my mother again.”
“What did the witch do now?” he asks, as he catches my ball on the rebound and runs away from me, bouncing it as he goes.
“Nothing new Gray, just wanted to involve me in one of her little publicity stunts today. No biggie.”
“Bitch.” He says.
Now most guys would probably get upset with anyone referring to their mother in that way. But unfortunately Gray is right on the money. He’s seen me go through this with my mom so many times. He knows that it affects me, but he also knows me well enough to let it go. There’s no point in hashing it out, nothing ever changes.
“What’d you get up to last night?” he asks by way of changing the subject.
I take a deep breath. I need to talk this out with someone, but I’m not sure that Gray is the right person. Then again, if not him, the only other person I trust enough is Nanny Grace, and I’m sure as hell not talking to her about
it.
“I had dinner with Ava, Olivia’s Sister.”
Gray stops dead on his approach to the hoop and stares at me with a shit-eating grin on his face. “Man, I knew you wanted to tap that. That’s why I backed off at Ryan’s party. Damn E, I really wanted to go there,” he says shaking his head at me. “How’d it go?” he asks.
“It went.” I say. “We had a great dinner, started making out, and things were progressing in the right direction and then I froze. It was like my fucking conscience was turned on after all these years and told me to stop. I was so confused that I up and left just when things were getting good.” I still can’t believe that I did that.
“What the hell?” Grayson says staring right at me. “What happened? Ethan Drake never leaves before the deed is done.” I know he’s teasing me, but it doesn’t help to lighten my mood any.
“I don’t know Gray, I honestly don’t know. I just knew that it wasn’t the right thing to do even though my head was screaming out to keep going. So I stopped. She’s under my skin man and I can’t get her out.”
Grayson smiles at me and shakes his head, tucking his ball back under his arm. “I never thought I’d see the day,” he says, “Ethan Drake is whipped!”
“Shut the fuck up, I am not,” I respond defensively.
Grayson throws an arm across my shoulders and grins at me. He raises his eye brows and nods his head up and down, “You so are.”
I snatch the ball from him before I swing back around and aim for the hoop, sinking the shot.
Is that what this is? Has she got me whipped?
I already know the answer to that – Yes! But what to do about it? That’s the question I need to ask.
Grayson grabs the ball as it bounces out of the hoop and takes a shot, sinking it again.
“I thought I could screw her out of my system. She’s already told me she only wants to be friends, but then one thing led to another and we were well on our way to being way more than friends, and I stopped it. I couldn’t go through with it. It felt wrong. Not that I didn’t want to screw her - that part felt right, so right. It just felt wrong to do it last night. Like it was too soon, and I was taking advantage, she’s not the type I can have a one night thing with.” I say, trying to explain this to myself as much as Grayson.
Grayson drops the ball and hangs his arm loosely over my shoulder again. “Man, you are sooo whipped.” He laughs and starts to head off the court, taking me with him.
“Come on, I’m buying you breakfast after that admission,” he laughs.
As we head towards the house to clean up I can’t help but wonder if Gray is right.
Has this girl got me whipped?
Deep down I already know the answer, and it causes my stomach to drop.
Mommie Dearest
Liv and I stroll through the aisles of the Supermarket, throwing items in to the trolley as we come across what we need. I am in awe of this grocery store. There are so many brands and so many things available here that we don’t have back home. It is both intimidating and exciting at the same time. Who would have thought that there were so many different brands of laundry soap and cereal?
Liv is reading the ingredients on a box of natural muesli. “You know Liv, one day soon; you probably won’t be able to do this,” I say, as the realisation hits that once the movie is released, grocery shopping will not be as easy for my famous sister.
“I know. On one hand I can’t wait and on the other I worry about what the loss of anonymity will do to me. At least I can always go home to Mum and Dad and hide out.”
I laugh. “The movie is going to be released in Australia too you know.” I point out to her.
“Yeah, but the paparazzi are not as relentless there. I’ll be able to go unnoticed more so than here in the States.” She places the box of muesli back on to the shelf and continues to push the cart down the aisle.
As we pull up to the check out, I notice a rack of glossy magazines. Ethan’s gorgeous face is smiling out at me from the cover of People. The slogan reads – World’s Sexiest Men! Well I’m not going to argue with that assessment. He really looks amazing.
That hair is just to-die-for.
That smile, those dimples…..
“Checking your boyfriend out on the cover there?” Olivia asks with a sly grin as she catches me checking the magazine out. I start to unload the mountain of groceries that we have piled in to the shopping cart, successfully avoiding her gaze.
“Very funny!” I state. “He is not my boyfriend.”
“We’ll see,” she says with that stupid grin still plastered on her face. “I know I told you to be careful of Ethan when you first arrived, but he seems different with you Ava, very sweet. I haven’t seen him like that with anyone else.”
I give her a look that says, “Yeah right!”
Olivia places a bottle of shampoo on to the conveyer belt and holds her palms up in the air, “Hey. I’m just saying! Don’t kill the messenger.” She laughs and turns back to the cart.
As the clerk fills our bags with groceries, I check my watch and slip back in to PA mode. “Liv, we need to be at the Studio at noon. We had better get home and put all this away so we can head over there. I need to put in a few hours with Josh today. You and Ethan are filming on location in Hawaii next week and we need to plan that out.”
She jumps up and down and claps her hands together. “I can’t wait. I’ve not been to Hawaii yet.”
Neither have I, and I can’t wait either.
I find Joshua hard at work at his computer when I enter the office. His dark rimmed glasses are in place and he is concentrating on whatever he is reading on the screen.
“Hey Josh,” I say in greeting as I put down my bag and retrieve my ipad and phone. “We need to plan out the Hawaii trip today.”
Josh gives me his trademark smile and turns his chair towards me. “Yes. Can’t wait for that next week. Have you been before Ava?”
“No first time.” I reply, as I boot up my computer and plug my ipad in to the charger on the wall.
“You’ll love it,” he says. “Very romantic location, and from the look of you and Ethan at Ryan’s party, Hawaii may be coming up at the right time.” He chuckles and spins his seat back to face his computer screen.
I blush and duck my head.
“Sorry Ava, I didn’t mean to embarrass you.” Joshua looks remorseful.
I shake my head. “No, you didn’t. Just not sure that is going to go anywhere, so the romantic locations in Hawaii are not something I consider when thinking of Ethan.”
Bullshit! My mind screams at me.
Joshua lets the subject go and gets down to business. “Whenever we travel to Hawaii we always stay right on the beach. The hotel has a man-made lagoon and heaps of gorgeous pools to lounge around. It’s within walking distance to the main area of Waikiki too. We’ll have a little bit of free time while we’re there, but not much. They’ll have us running around a lot. Whenever we shoot on location the timeframes are tight.”
“It sounds amazing Josh. I can’t wait to not only get to Waikiki but also to be part of that process. Not everyone gets to watch a feature film in production.”
We spend the afternoon booking flights and accommodation, arranging schedules and ensuring that the hotel has all the details required for our stay. Ethan and Olivia are pretty tame compared to most celebrities, but they both have a small list of requirements that we need to ensure is ready for them. Mainly simple things like a certain brand of water for Olivia, and a certain type of shampoo for Ethan.
Maybe that’s why he has such great hair!
Joshua tells me how Madeline Rose likes a certain type of feather in her pillows, and how she won’t sleep on linen that is less than a certain thread count. Why doesn’t that surprise me about her!
As we’re entering all the details in to our on-line calendars there is a commotion outside the office door. I hear a high pitched voice, and then another greeting the first. Joshua and I give each ot
her a look and rise from our chairs, making our way to the hallway. Just outside her Dressing Room door we spy Madeline excitedly embracing another woman. Behind her is a man with a large camera, the type that you use for portraits, a really high-tech one, with a long lens.
After air kissing one another, Madeline says, “Hello Ms Drake, how nice to see you again.”
My god, this must be Ethan’s Mother, Elizabeth Drake. I can’t wait to see what she looks like in the flesh. From the back she is dressed expensively, and her outfit is complimented by the stunning accessories she is wearing.
Elizabeth Drake turns so I can glimpse her profile. She is flawless, just gorgeous.
Just like her son.
“Hello Madeline dear. How lovely to see you again after all this time. I’m so pleased that you are working with Ethan.” Her voice is smooth and cultured, and her sentences are measured.
As if on cue, Ethan rounds the corner and stops dead in his tracks when he spies Madeline and his mother together. He narrows his gaze, pulls himself to his full height and moves forward. “Mother, what are you doing here? I told you I was working today.” His voice is low and there is a high level of annoyance there.
Elizabeth turns to Ethan, with a beaming smile on her face. She hooks her arm through his and holds on tight. “I know darling, but I had already arranged the photographer, and I thought that perhaps we could have some photos taken of me visiting you on set, I am after all, so very proud of you.” She kisses him on each cheek as a greeting.
Ethan looks pissed. In fact, he looks really pissed, but I have to give him credit, he fixes his face in to a blank stare to disguise his scowl.
Elizabeth turns towards Joshua and I. Josh has obviously met her before because I see the recognition in her eyes when she sees him. She holds out her hand towards him and says, “Hello Joshua. Would you mind grabbing me a glass of water dear? Perrier, no ice.”