by A. B Lee
“I did, and I’m sure that it was said for my benefit.” I poked the bear- or the wolf in this case- to see what kind of reaction that would get.
“We didn’t know you’d be there,” he offered and I had to consider that. True- to a point.
“But you probably expected that there would be someone watching you at all times, ergo, it could have been a plot to take that information back to me and my people,” I shrugged.
“Devious mind,” he said and I felt the flush start to warm my cheeks.
“It’s what I’d do,” I lied. I probably wouldn’t have thought of it.
“And where would be the advantage for us in that?” he asked.
“A pressure point.”
“I don’t follow.” Seth was either a good actor or he didn’t get what I was implying.
“You scratch my back and I’ll scratch yours,” I offered.
“Still not with you.” Seth shrugged those broad shoulders, the shoulders that blotted out the beauty of the land around me and made me see only him.
“If I mate with you then your pack will help us, if I don’t…”
“Now hold on right there,” he growled in annoyance. That smile had gone and his eyes were darkening. Had I misjudged him- again?
“Look,” I wanted to make my case, but he took that next step and I had no choice but to back up- then another, and another until I felt the hard thud of the tree trunk at my back and found I had nowhere else to go.
Two big, muscled arms came up on either side of me as he palmed the trunk and caged me in. While it was true that I could have used my magic to send him backwards- because that had worked out so miraculously well for me the last time- I was also intrigued to hear what he had to say.
“I don’t need to buy your affections with my packs loyalty to your realm,” he growled and the vibration from that deep rumble rattled my bones, “you’re my mate and my pack’s alignment to your people is cemented in that fact. You can try to see what isn’t there, Jazz, but we’re an honourable people, and we look after our own.”
Well, that told me. I felt more than guilty- I felt like crawling off under a damn rock and staying there for a good long while.
CHAPTER EIGHT
~
“Point made and understood,” I replied; trying to keep my tone as level as possible.
Not only had I made a fool out of myself, and I was glad I hadn’t done it in front of the others, but I was also battling some insane urge to reach up and run my fingertip along one of those damned muscles in his arms, poke it, test it to see just how rock solid it was…
I was losing my mind.
“Good.”
Seth’s eyes roamed down to my lips, for one long, breath holding moment I believed that he was going to kiss me, and I panicked, but it wasn’t the rush to blast him across the Glen kind of a panic that had griped me before, no, it was more the heart racing, soul stirring, womb jiggling, kind of panic that caused me to frown hard at him and turn my head a little. His eyes snapped back to mine and that moment faded.
I wasn’t sure if I was relieved or very damn disappointed, and I would have to hedge my bets on that one.
“Tell me what happens when the vampires come,” Seth asked and I frowned harder, talk about a complete change of conversation- well, not really the conversation, but the near kiss, if that’s what it had been, this was a mood killer if ever I’d heard one. I tried to focus on what he was asking.
“They attack, plunder, we fight, some die, some disappear- never to be seen again.” Under the circumstances, it was the best that I could do, my mind was still a hive of sexually charged activity.
“You- fight?” I saw him swallow hard and didn’t know why.
“Yes.”
“I don’t like that.” Seth scowled down at me and I found that I didn’t like that. It was way better when he smiled.
“I’m… not sure what you want me to say here,” I admitted. It wasn’t like I was going to apologise for defending our realm.
“Say you won’t fight this time.”
“Impossible, if I’m still there…” I wanted to bite my tongue as his dark eyes narrowed on mine. Whoops!
“You’re considering coming with me?”
“Not exactly,” I was cagey. I felt I had to be.
“Then?” He was pushy, I guessed that was in his nature.
Ok, time to fess up. “My wings have changed colour, if I don’t mate with you then they will wither and die,” I saw his eyes narrow further as he took that information in. They were just jet black pools of sexiness and I suddenly had the urge to dive right into them.
“Die?”
“Not me, them. But…” I stopped. I didn’t want to say the words. I didn’t want to hear them again, even from my own lips.
“I don’t like buts,” he urged me on again. Damn it!
“I would become human, non-Fae. I’d grow to this size permanently and wouldn’t be able to stay within the realm,” I admitted.
There- I’d said it, but from the look of shock on his face it was the first that he’d heard of it.
“So we both have a lot to lose,” he growled.
In that moment I understood perfectly. It was true, both of us stood to lose by not being mated, and yet the thought of becoming his, intimately his was still overwhelming me. We weren’t just tethered together by this unseen bond that fate had devised, but by the losses that we faced in the choices that we made if we didn’t become one.
There was I resenting him for being my mate when he had as much to lose, if not more, than I did.
I’d been selfish, thoughtless, arrogant and self-pitying, all of the things that I wished I was not. I felt stupid and small in that moment- not physically small, but emotionally stunted, and lacking in empathy for his side of this equation.
In one heart stomping moment, he growled hard and pushed away from the tree, away from me, and the rush of air swept around me, but did not fill the void of his loss.
“How could fate be so cruel?” He growled long and hard.
“I guess she likes to get her way,” I offered back. It was the best that I could do. I had no kind words and feel better tactics to sooth him- I was still pretty much in self-pitying mode.
“How unlike the feminine side of life,” he turned his head back towards me and his eyes took me in, held me there, trapped in his gaze, as a small quirky smile touched his lips.
“You’d better believe it,” I said.
I could have rushed to deny it. Made some kind of feminist stand that human society was so fond of, but in my world we were all equal already, and stands were unnecessary- but in Seth’s world- the males were dominant. I wondered what that would be like.
“Are you prepared to lose your wings, Jazz?” Seth turned back to me and walked the few paces to put himself in front of me and blot out the landscape again.
“I…” thought I was- now, faced with him asking me, it seemed I wasn’t so sure anymore.
“Do you need a moment?” He smiled on a tease and I rolled my eyes and tried to look anywhere but at him, but those eyes, laughing now, called me to them.
“I need something,” I said as I leant back against the tree and was grateful for the solidity behind my back.
My mind wouldn’t co-operate fully with what I was trying to achieve. I wanted to centre on my doubts, not be fascinated with those little dimples that formed either side of his mouth when he smiled.
“Me,” he said as simply as that and my heart jolted my ribs once more.
“Maybe not.” I rushed to answer, but that smile was still teasing and those dimples were still very real.
Then he was back caging me in with those muscled arms on either side of me and his body arched away from touching mine as he brought his face down closer, eye to eye, we stood and stared. I had a hard time with trying to catch my breath…
“Are you certain of that?” Seth’s eyes questioned me, even as his lips still taunted me with his smile.
“Let’s find out.” His eyes lit up with a hungry look that sent my pulse soaring. I liked and hated that idea, even if I didn’t know what it was.
“I’m not going to ask,” I said. Even if I really, really wanted to know.
“Then let me explain,” he said a moment before he brought his lips down on mine. So softly, so gently was he in his touch- that I wasn’t sure what I’d been expecting in my imaginings last night as I had tossed and turned and wondered at this moment- but it wasn’t this.
Oh- who was I kidding? I was expecting the man to be a ferocious savage, ripping at my clothes and trying to devour me with hot, passionate kisses- and that was the damn reason that I couldn’t sleep- covers on, covers off- fanning my damn body heat away, even thought that heat was internally combusting my system and not coming from the outside.
I didn’t move- I didn’t breathe- I… waited to see what he’d do next, even thought my hands wanted to wander over his muscles, and I had the irrational need to climb up those thick legs of his and wrap myself around his upper body like a vine- I held still.
His lips teased mine. His tongue came out to run against the seam and I tried to deny him, but my body betrayed me, opening to his kiss and allowing his tongue to sweep against mine.
The growl that rumbled through him was electric by nature, rolling over my skin and making every inch of it come alive.
I was lost.
In that moment of pure insanity I kissed him back. My hands sought the stability, the solidity of his body, and my fingers got their first touch against those tensing muscles that danced beneath my fingertips as they searched, roamed, plundered…
I felt his hand against the back of my head, his fingers fisted in my hair, and he gave a small tug that sent a lightning bolt of pure goodness to my womb, and he tipped my head back- and then he did devour me as I had imagined.
Now I really was lost. My mind and body were two separate entities and my body had won the day. It responded to his kiss, to the hard press of his chest against my breasts; making them ache for more of his touch, and the other hand that he allowed to roam down over my hip sent waves of heat rushing out from my womb to every inch of my body.
Wow.
Whoa!
My brain kicked in and I used the palms of my hands against his shoulders to push him away. I didn’t need to push hard- the moment that he felt something had changed between us he pulled back, broke the kiss, which really sent my body to war with my mind, and rested his forehead against mine as he tried to regain his composer.
“Sorry, I overstepped,” he growled like a hungry wolf, and even that curled my damn stupid toes into the earth.
“I have no words,” I said so damn breathlessly that I wanted to hide my head in shame.
How could I even consider berating him when I’d been more than a willing participant?
I wasn’t going to add bare faced hypocrite to my list of things I hated about myself since meeting him.
“Maybe you can find the answer to that question now,” Seth pushed the point again and I winced. I couldn’t even remember what the damn question was, and I wasn’t going to ask.
I stayed silent. He stayed silent. The only sound between us for what felt like an eternity was the sound of our breathing.
“Maybe you need more help in finding the answer.”
Seth grinned again, with those puppy dog eyes, those damn dimples, and that smile… geez, give a girl a break!
“No, I just need…” I winced again and he pulled back slightly, looking at me like the wolf that got the damn rabbit.
“You can’t remember the question, can you?” He chuckled and I frowned.
“What?” I faked disbelief, “of course I can.”
“What was it?” He challenged me.
Damn, that was unexpected. He called my bluff and I had… nothing.
“It was…” I sighed and gave up trying, “I have nothing.”
That grin spread far and wide. Those dimples got deeper, so deep I might have lost a fingertip in there had I poked them. His eyes teased me mercilessly, and then he chuckled, deep and rumbly- sending a buzz of something good right down to my toes.
“You were trying to figure out if you needed me.”
He kind of looked triumphant and I kind of wanted that damn rock to climb under again.
“Oh,” I said. It was all that I could manage.
“You didn’t rush to deny it,” he chuckled again.
“I…” I gave up trying to better him. I groaned inwardly, but also realised that I hadn’t rushed to deny it. My body was still pulsing from his kiss.
“Or now when you’ve had a moment to think on it.”
I kind of wanted to hit him over the head with a large branch, and kind of didn’t at the same time.
“Who can think?” I said, more to myself than to him, but he chuckled harder and my cheeks got so hot that I wanted to bury my face in the snow at the very tip of the mountain, but it wasn’t on our realm, and I wasn’t planning on flying that far today.
“Still no denial, Jazz.” He teased and I’d had enough.
How was I supposed to think when he was all around me like that?
“Back off, wolf,” I demanded.
“Say my name and I will,” he grinned.
I rolled that thought over in my unwilling mind. It was still centred on other, more important things, like my curling toes, and my jiggling womb, and of course, those damn dimples.
“Just once,” he breathed out against my lips, “I just want to hear my name on your lips.”
“Seth.”
It sounded… strange. It felt… weird, almost like saying his name when he asked had built up more of a connection between us.
Seth growled again. This time it sounded hungry. His lips brushed mine, and I hate to say it but I panicked again. I was only just starting to get my body to co-operate with my mind and let a rational thought back in- when I lost it again and kneed him right in the balls…
CHAPTER NINE
~
Seth went down like a felled tree, and I grimaced at the sight of his pain.
He was a shifter- in a minute or two he would be up and fighting fit again, but that didn’t stop me from feeling guilty- it also didn’t stop me from sidestepping him and using that distraction, whilst he was centred on holding his balls, to get out of his way.
“Gotta go.” I took a jump into the air and shifted back into my pint sized version of me. I fluttered my wings and didn’t look back- more than three times- as I swept away from him.
Gone, but not forgotten, my body still pined for his touch.
~
~
~
“I saw that.” Bree’s words sounded like an accusation and made the guilt flush within me again.
“Then stop following me,” I snorted back at her as she flew beside me.
“You kissed him right back.” She didn’t need to remind me.
“You saw that?” I snorted my contempt again.
“And then you kicked him in the balls,” she accused.
“I’m a complex person.”
“You’re insane,” Bree moaned.
“I’m a conflicted.” I hissed.
“You’re certifiable. If you do go and live in the human world, they might just lock you up.” Bree informed me without any humour at all in her voice.
“And I’d deserve it,” I admitted, more than a little reluctantly.
I swooped down and landed with a thud against my pride on the nearest rock. I pulled my knees up against my chest and hugged them to me. I didn’t feel right, I didn’t feel like me anymore.
Life was… harder to comprehend. Harder to live. Even the mundane seemed like a challenge.
Bree fluttered down beside me. “You’re not a bad person,” Bree started with her sympathetic voice, “but you do have anger issues.” She finished in a harsher tone.
“I
know,” I whimpered.
“You have to stop kneeing people in the balls and trying to break their noses,” Bree berated me.
“I know, I know!” I waved an absent hand around as I helplessly shrugged my shoulders and grew a little louder in my assertions.
“And you have to give your mate a chance,” Bree berated me again.
My head snapped around and I glared at her.
“That’s cunning, butter me up and then hit me with the good stuff,” I snorted my contempt for her tactics.
“Did it work?” She had glee and mischief within her eyes.
“No,” I snapped back.
“But still, you kissed him,” she grinned wildly, “what was it like?”
“A kiss,” I lied. It was like nothing I’d ever experienced before and possibly would never experience again. I sighed inwardly at that thought.
“Some friend you are, when I can’t even get the juicy details,” she huffed.
“Don’t guilt trip me, Faerie!” I snapped back.
“Don’t make me,” she whined, “share.”
The sight of hopeful glee within her eyes made me smile. Bree always had a way to cheer me up even on my darkest days.
“No,” I snapped back, “bad Faerie.” I teased her.
Bree rolled her eyes at me and then leaned in to rest her head on my shoulder, looking up at me all pitiful like.
“Pretty please,” she whispered.
I sighed. “Fine. It was…” I hesitated and frowned. Bree waited patiently. “Amazing, I guess…”
“You guess?”
“It was… gentle- that I never expected, and then as it went on it was intense, passionate, ferocious…”
I heard Bree sigh. My friend was definitely in love with the idea of being in love. Poor Bree.
“And then I kicked him right in the balls,” I realised. It wasn’t that I didn’t know what I’d done. My knee was painfully, throbbing-ly, aware- it was more that I just realised that I was a she-demon of epic proportion.
“Poor, Seth.” Bree sighed as she straightened up and shook her head. I winced again.