by Staci Hart
Her eyes went wide. “Oh, my God, Rose. Is this that guy you used to date that you said did that thing in bed where he—”
I laughed super loud to cover whatever she was about to say and grabbed her by the shoulders to present her to Patrick. “Tricky, this is my cousin Ellie. Looks like she’s going to be staying with us for a while.”
His jaw was a sharp line, the corner of his mouth drawing up in a smirk. “Nice to meet you.”
Ellie’s brows knit together in confusion. “Wait, he lives here? Were you guys sleeping together? I thought you guys broke up?”
My cheeks were on fire, and I wished to God she picked up on body language, particularly mine as it told her to stop talking. “Ah, he’s just staying here for a little while.”
“But where’s Lily?”
“Staying with West, so we sort of swapped roommates temporarily. Tricky here has been sleeping in her old room.”
She snickered. “Not what it looks like to me. I can sleep on the couch, as long as you guys aren’t using it.” Her eyebrows climbed.
Patrick shook his head. “Don’t worry about it. Take the room. I have a bed at my own place.”
“I’m down for whatever,” she said with a shrug.
“You take the room. I insist.” He smiled, but I could see how bummed he was, and I’ll admit — I hated seeing him like that, knowing he was contemplating more sleepless nights. Not enough to demand he sleep on my couch, though. I’d offer it, but no way would I push him to stay. Especially after last night, or this morning, or whatever time we ended up cuddling on the couch. Like I needed shirtless Patrick in my house any more than was absolutely necessary.
I tried not to think about how good that had felt, being close to him. Being in his arms, his skin against mine, his —
Stop it, goddammit.
I smiled. “Couch is always free, Trick.”
“Thanks, Rose.”
I turned to my cousin and took a breath, still a little flabbergasted. “I’m just so surprised to see you, El.”
“Good, that was the idea.” She was still smiling like she’d slept for nine hours and had the best night’s sleep of her life. “I took the redeye out of LA and slept on the plane, so I’m ready for a day of New Yorking! What should we do first?”
I blinked. “I have no idea.”
“Okay, well you take a minute to think it over and wake up while I go get me and Valentino settled in.”
I stopped and looked over at her, realizing she had a small crate attached to her suitcase. “Valentino?”
Ellie smiled, rolling her eyes dramatically. “My cat, silly.”
I cocked my head. “How long are you staying, El?”
She shrugged and rolled her way into Lily’s room. “You know, just however long,” she said noncommittally.
Ellie disappeared into the room, and I turned back to look at Patrick, who shook his head.
“I have no idea what’s happening,” I muttered.
“Looks like you got a new roommate.”
“And a cat.”
He smiled. “And a cat.”
“Just what I never wanted.”
As if on cue, a very fat, very fancy black cat strutted out of Lily’s room, sizing Patrick and I up with judgy, green eyes. His fur was black, though his paws and chest were white with a black marking just under his neck, which made him look like he was wearing a tuxedo. He hopped up on the table and sat, wrapping his fluffy black tail around his paws.
I reached out to scratch his neck. “Hello, there, Valentino.”
He lifted his jaw, looking away with a meow, giving me his permission to pet him.
I couldn’t help but laugh. “This cat is fancy as fuck.”
Valentino looked less than impressed at the likes of Patrick and me.
Patrick padded into the kitchen to make coffee, and I sat down at the table, feeling overwhelmed.
I ran my hand down Valentino’s silky back, and he arched his spine into my palm as I watched Patrick pouring the water in the tank, putting in the filter, pouring in the grounds, all while bugging the fuck out.
I’d just woken up in Patrick Evans’ arms.
Those were words I never thought I’d utter again, even if only in my mind.
I couldn’t remember how it happened, if he’d fallen asleep first or if I had. It was just like it used to be, the two of us wound together — we always slept like that, before. Part of me wondered if he’d planned it, wondered if he was fucking with me or something. But I watched him, standing in my apartment, looking like he belonged there, making coffee like he used to, making me feel like I used to. Making it harder to keep my feelings in check.
He hurt you, Rose. Don’t forget that.
The truth of the matter was that it meant nothing. It didn’t change the fact that we weren’t together. It didn’t change anything that had happened between us. It didn’t mean he was forgiven, or that I was wanted.
It didn’t change anything.
There was only one solution: to pretend it didn’t happen.
So instead of dealing, I’d throw myself into planning Ellie’s day.
I got up and made my way to the couch, digging through the cushions until I found my phone to text Maggie.
Hey, hope it’s not too early to message on a Saturday, but I just had my cousin drop in unexpectedly, and I was wondering if you still had your sightseeing list?
She texted back a minute or so later as Patrick took a seat next to me, setting my cup of coffee on the table in front of me.
Hey, no worries, we’re up. I have the list, or if y’all want, I can come with. Just let me know!
I sighed, relieved. “Thank God for Maggie.” That would be so great. Maybe we can meet at Genie’s and put together a plan?
Sounds good. I’ll head that way.
“Hey, Ellie,” I called into the other room, “you hungry?”
“Starved.”
“All right.” I pulled up Lily’s name in my texts and invited her too, then exchanged my phone for the coffee, sitting back on the couch with another sigh.
Next to Patrick.
He yawned, which made me yawn.
I sipped my coffee feeling squirrelly and tired and confused, repeating to myself that nothing had changed, nothing had changed, nothing had changed. I felt him watching me and looked over, meeting his gaze.
Time seemed to slow down. I don’t know what it was … something in his eyes that called to me, something that scared me. Because if he’d asked me anything in that moment, I would have said yes.
Ellie walked in, and our heads swung around to look at her. She smiled like she’d just caught us doing something more than sitting in a quiet room together. “So, breakfast?”
“Yeah,” I said as I hauled myself off the couch. “Give me five minutes to get ready.” And I hurried out of the room, wishing I could erase him from my heart so easily.
Patrick
I parted ways with Ellie and Rose in the hallway, catching Rose’s eyes once for a long moment, wondering if she knew what I was thinking, if she knew what I wanted. If she understood that I wasn’t going to wait quietly in the wings anymore.
All this time, I thought she didn’t want me. I thought I couldn’t have her. But this morning, with her body against mine, I knew. When she looked at me, eyes wide and open, I was sure. She wanted me just as badly as I wanted her, and this time, I wouldn’t stop. Not until she was mine again.
My determination echoed in every beat of my heart, every footstep, every thought, as I showered, changed, walked the blocks to work. I needed a plan, because I couldn’t go into this guns blazing and just take her. Not yet. If I wasn’t careful, I’d blow it, and this was it. My last bullet.
I’d win back her trust, and the second I could make a move, I would.
By the time I walked into Tonic, I felt more sure of myself than I had before, maybe ever. The shop was mostly empty — I was on the early bird crew — though Joel was at his desk in his station.
He looked up and looked me over, one eyebrow climbing.
“What set your boots on fire?”
I smiled. “Rose.”
“What’d you do?”
I walked into his station and leaned on the short wall. “Nothing, yet.”
“Well, don’t hold out on me. What happened? Tell me everything.”
“I’m gonna get her back.”
He waited for me to elaborate and huffed when I didn’t. “Stop being cryptic, goddammit, and tell me what’s going on.”
My smile stretched wider, though I struggled to find the words. “I’m not even sure how to tell you, Joel. When we woke up this morning, I just knew I had a shot. I felt so stupid for not seeing it before, but …” I rubbed my jaw. “I thought she didn’t want me, but that was a lie. I can get her back. I’ve just got to prove she can trust me again.”
“Hold up, back up. When you woke up? Together?”
“Yeah. We fell asleep on the couch last night, and this morning she just looked at me, and I knew. It was just a glimpse, but it was there.”
“Well, what are you going to do? Ask her out?”
My smile fell a little. “She’s doing some online dating thing. I ran into her yesterday after one of her dates.”
He folded his arms and shook his head. “Man, I told you this would eventually happen. Now it’s going to be even harder to get her back, you realize that, right? She’s going to meet her dream guy and forget all about you.”
“She won’t.”
“How do you know?”
I smirked and leaned forward. “Because I’m her dream guy.”
A laugh boomed out of him. “I can’t argue with that, Tricky. I really can’t.”
“I just can’t fuck it up this time.”
“No, you can’t. I suspect if there is a chance for you here, it’s the last one. Last call.”
“Last call,” I echoed, knowing it was the truth. I had to step up and order or walk out. And I wasn’t ready to leave.
10
IT'S TRICKY
Rose
I PUSHED OPEN THE DOOR to Genie’s after breakfast, and the girls filed out behind me.
“So,” Lily started, “we’ll get Ellie a thirty-day MetroCard, and hop the train to Times Square. After that, we’ll walk to Rockefeller, then to Grand Central and take the train back up to Saks.”
“Perfect, Mom,” I said cheerily. “Did you print up itineraries for us?”
She stuck her tongue out at me.
“Sounds good to me,” Ellie added, looking up at the buildings as we headed toward the subway. “Now that’s all settled, can we please talk about how you were sleeping with Tricky when I got here this morning?”
Lily and Maggie’s faces whipped around with identical expressions, and I felt my cheeks heat up.
“Uh, what’s that you say?” Lily asked.
“Whatever, it was nothing. He was hanging out last night, and we fell asleep on the couch. End of story.”
Ellie laughed. “Looked like more than that to me.”
I made a face. “We were fully clothed.”
No one spoke.
“We didn’t even kiss!” I added, frustrated.
“Did you want to kiss?” Maggie asked.
“No, of course not,” I lied.
“He sure looked like he wanted to kiss you,” Ellie said as she stepped off the curb.
“Thanks for that, Ellie. It’s not a big deal guys. So I’m attracted to my ex, and he’s staying at my place because somebody’s getting nailed like a porn star every night.”
Lily rolled her eyes.
“We fell asleep on the couch. It’s not like I banged him.”
Lily shook her head at me. “You mean to tell me that you’re not at all conflicted about hanging out with Tricky all night and sleeping with him? Like, nada? No feelings on the matter?”
“I mean, sure, it was weird, but it didn’t mean anything. We didn’t even talk about it, and I’m dating, remember?”
Maggie eyed me. “So you don’t know if it was a big deal for him, though, right?”
I scoffed. “Of course it wasn’t. Honestly, I think he just feels guilty about how things ended and probably wants to bone me just as bad as I want him to bone me. That’s all. That’s the extent of it.” I said it like it had to be true, because if it wasn’t true, I was in deeper shit than I thought.
Lily snickered. “You want to bone him.”
“Who doesn’t want to bone Tricky?” I asked, flustered. “Have you seen him?”
She laughed. “Nice try. It’s okay to admit that you enjoyed sleeping with him, you know.”
“Sure. It was nice. Amazing, even. He smells like heaven, and his arms are so sexy, they could have their own Tumblr. But he’s not mine, and I don’t want him.”
Lily raised a brow.
“Okay, I refuse to want him.” We trotted down the subway stairs in silence for a second before I continued. “Seriously, this changes nothing, okay? It was just a weird thing that happened and it’s over. Later, we’ll pick out a new guy for me go out with, because I’m dating. I’m gonna date some guy so hard, he’s gonna get whiplash. I’m gonna date the fuck out of that guy because I’m over Tricky, and he’s over me, and it’s over, okay?” I rambled, taking a breath as soon as I could.
“Fair enough,” Lily said as we walked up to the MetroCard vending machine, seeming to answer for everyone.
“Thank you,” I huffed.
Ellie’s face scrunched up as she inspected the machine. “How’s this work?”
Lily smiled and stepped up to the machine. “Here, I’ll do it for you.”
I sighed, feeling the pressure of the conversation leave a little as I turned to Maggie. “How are you? I haven’t seen you in an age.”
She beamed, pushing her blond, curly hair our of her face. “Oh, I’m good.” Her Mississippi accent was thick as honey. “Just so busy. Work has been nuts at the shelter. I’m so happy for the promotion, but man, they have me workin’ like crazy putting together reading curriculums for homeless shelters across the city.”
I smiled proudly. “That’s amazing, Mags.”
A blush bloomed across her freckled cheeks. “Thanks. It’s my dream job.”
“All right,” Lily said, “We’ve got it. Let’s go.”
We headed toward the turnstile. “How was Greece?”
“Oh, Rose, it was the most beautiful place I’ve ever seen. We started in Athens and sailed to Mykonos, Rhodes, and Santorini. That one was my favorite. I could have stayed forever,” she said with a dreamy sigh. “Anyway, Coop is good too, he’s just been working like crazy like me. I swear, we get home every night, order in, watch a little TV, and pass out. I miss y’all though. You doin’ okay?”
“Yeah, I’m doing okay. Just the usual, you know. Work. Sleep. That’s pretty much it.”
“And Tricky’s staying with you. That’s new.”
We stopped at the platform. Lily and Ellie chatted, and I dropped my voice a little. “Yeah. It’s the right thing to do, and I want to help him, but it hasn’t been easy.”
“No, I can’t imagine that it has been. Seriously, those eyes he gives you … I don’t know how you’re still standing.”
I chuckled. “Some days I don’t either.”
The train pulled up, and once the doors opened, we filed on. It was early enough that we found seats together.
“So,” Ellie said, turning in her seat, “I’m kinda fuzzy on how all you guys know each other. Like, didn’t Maggie live with you for a minute, Rose?”
“Musical roommates,” Lily said with a laugh.
I laughed. “Seriously. Everyone’s lived with me except Cooper and West.” I turned to face Ellie. “Okay, so it’s a little complicated, so tell me if you get lost.”
She settled in and put her concentrating face on. “Okay.”
“All right. So, the first person to move into the building was Tricky. He lived there with his friend Seth for about a year. And abo
ut halfway into that year, I moved in with Jack and Liz.”
Her eyes were narrowed in thought. “Got it. Also, fuck Jack.”
I held up my hand for a high five, and she slapped it. “Yes, fuck Jack. So, when Seth moved out, West moved in.”
“Wait.” Her nose wrinkled up. “How did Cooper know Patrick?”
“They met at some club opening and hit it off. When he found out Tricky was a tattoo artist, he sent West over to the shop because he wanted some work done, and when they got to talking, it came up that Tricky needed a roommate. So did West, he and Coop were moving out of their dorms at Columbia, and West didn’t want to live on the East side, penthouse or not.”
She snorted. “Yeah, I think I’d take the penthouse.”
Lily laughed. “Well, West’s nothing if not practical.”
“Okay,” I continued, using my hands to make a diagram in the air. “So West moved in with Tricky, and then Jack and Liz took off. Then Lily moved in.”
Lily raised her fist in solidarity. “Flower power.”
She nodded. “I’m still with you.”
“Then Maggie moved here a few months ago and stayed with us for a minute. Or, me I guess, since Lily wasn’t really sleeping at home anymore. And she’s West’s sister.”
“Right. Okay.” She paused for a second, and I could see the wheels in her brain turning. “Okay. I might have followup questions, but I think I’m good for now.” She snapped her fingers. “Wait, Lily has a sister too, right?”
Lily grabbed the pole in front of her as the train pulled to a stop. “Yeah, Astrid.”
Ellie’s eyes widened. “Oh, right. Astrid Thomas. The model, duh. Like I haven’t seen her in USWeekly.”
“That’s my sister,” Lily chimed. “She wanted to come today, but Times Square on a Saturday is like a paparazzi nightmare. She’ll be at Habits tonight, though.”
Ellie perked up even more. “I can’t wait to see this bar after everything I’ve heard.”
“And,” Lily said, “Tonight’s the night we pick out Rose’s next date, since her last one was a disaster.”
My face was flat. “He stalked my Facebook and surprised me with facts about myself.”