“The laws of England protect the rich.”
“She has the enmity of Lady Catherine, but I swear to use every method and unfairness in the system I can find to protect her. I am acquainted with the gentleman who gave her the hairpin, and I intend to find him and make him testify to the truth of what happened.”
“Of course you know him. All deceptive gentlemen hang together.” Darcy felt rather offended, but as his aunt was trying to murder the woman’s niece in a fit of pique, he let it pass.
“Is he…” Elizabeth hesitated and spoke cautiously. “How Pamela described him reminded me of the gentleman who seduced my sister.”
Darcy smiled at Elizabeth’s attempt to avoid saying the name. “It was Mr. Wickham. Miss Bennet, might I…I would like to speak to you.”
She nodded. A little somberly. It made Darcy worried. What was she thinking? Surely she must love him now. Surely she couldn’t refuse him again.
They walked out into the garden next to the kitchen. The light of the full moon lit up Elizabeth with a soft pale glow, and her face looked white and the curve of her eyebrows was stark and bold. She wasn’t wearing gloves. Her hands looked small, and Darcy wanted to take one and caress it between his fingers.
He did.
She did not resist him when he took her hand. But she also did not look into his eyes. Darcy wanted to speak, but his heart raced, there was a lump in his throat, and he could not make his voice work.
He believed she loved him. She must love him now. She had let him hold her hand, but her expression was not encouraging. Of course she was still somber because of concern for Pamela.
Darcy swallowed and took a deep breath. “Elizabeth, I… Is it possible? We have spent so much time talking and… Let me speak plainly. I love you, I always have loved you. My affections and wishes have not changed since that evening here so many years before. They can never change, but one word from you will silence me forever on this subject.”
Elizabeth did not look up during this speech, and in the moonlight Darcy could not tell if she had flushed, but she squeezed the hand he was holding tightly. She did not say anything.
Darcy pressed their fingers tighter together. “Please, Elizabeth, say something.”
She was crying.
Darcy wiped his fingers tenderly over her cheeks. Elizabeth leaned up on her toes and kissed him.
She put her hand around his neck and pressed her body against his, and she pressed her lips against his with a frantic, untutored desperation.
Darcy held her head and her hips and kept her close as they kissed. But rather than happiness, he felt anxiety. Something about how she kissed him was wrong. He felt so scared. As though she was saying “goodbye”, rather than “I will.”
Darcy looked into Elizabeth’s eyes. There were tears in them. The full moon glinted off the wetness on her cheeks.
She shook her head. “I can’t. Not now. I can’t marry you.”
“Elizabeth! I…” It felt as though a pit had opened under Darcy. He wanted to be swallowed up by it. Darcy closed his eyes. He whispered, “If you do not love me, it is…no matter. I understand. I am still —”
“I do love you! I love you desperately. There is nothing I wish more than to marry you. But I can’t leave Emma.”
Darcy began to breathe again. He understood the problem now.
“Do not hate me. I deserve it if you do. But Emma needs me, and she has no one else.”
“I could never hate you.”
“If ever I can…but I need to be here for Emma. You have seen how Lady Catherine treats her — and since you will not marry Anne, she will never let you have her. I must stay here with Emma.”
“I had not thought about how…but I see now. It is such a tangled mess. But…”
“Do not tell me to abandon her! I love Emma as though she were my own daughter, and she loves me as dearly.”
“She is Lady Catherine’s ward.” Darcy spoke softly and he placed a hand on Elizabeth’s arm. “Whatever you feel, whatever is right, you have no legal tie to her.”
“I know! I know that horrible, vicious woman can tear us apart. But while I can stay near Emma, I must.”
“You have a close affection for her. Perhaps a new governess would care for her in the same way.”
“No. Not a woman Lady Catherine hired to replace me. And even if I thought so… I will not abandon Emma. Forgive me…it is not that I do not love you. Please believe me. But though it breaks my heart I cannot leave.”
Darcy looked at Elizabeth. Her lips trembled. He pulled her in tighter to embrace her. He loved her so.
This would leave her under Lady Catherine’s power. Worse, Lady Catherine was erratic. She knew Darcy had an affection for Emma and Elizabeth, and she might seek to gain revenge against Emma. The worst that Lady Catherine could do to Elizabeth was to dismiss her, and then she would be free of her charge and able to marry him.
If he just waited, he could still have Elizabeth, and perhaps soon…
Darcy kissed Elizabeth’s forehead. “Do you wish… I fear what Lady Catherine might do to Emma. She knows I was attached to her. Ought I… Do you think…” Darcy swallowed again. He was not sure what he would do if Elizabeth answered yes. “Do you wish me to marry Anne? To protect Emma.”
Elizabeth clapped her hand over her mouth and shook her head wordlessly. She took his hand and kissed it. “No, no. Not that. I… Lady Catherine will calm eventually. And Emma, she will grow and eventually become independent of Lady Catherine. But marrying Anne. No, no. You should never marry one you do not like. No, not that.”
“Elizabeth, I love you. When that day comes… I will wait until your duty to Emma is done, and I will be there to marry you.”
Tears were falling down Elizabeth’s cheeks. She kissed him again. More sweetly this time, and Darcy clutched her against him, holding her tight in his arms.
“Do not be silly.” She said, “It will be many years until my duty is done. I do not expect you to wait. Be reasonable.”
“I do not want to be reasonable. I want you.”
They kissed again. Darcy held her against him. She squeezed her arms tightly around him, and Elizabeth’s breasts and stomach and legs all pressed into his body. He wanted to whisper into her ear and beg her to marry him immediately. But he did not.
Chapter Fourteen
“Is that Miss Bennet? Is it? Is it?”
Lady Catherine stood in the middle of her sitting room in a long dressing gown that she had left open displaying the voluminous folds of her nightdress. Strands of hair fell down her forehead and half the bun of her hair had been pulled out and now stuck in all directions. The opening of her dress let Elizabeth see the age marks along her breasts and the sagging wrinkles which normally were hidden by her stays and rouge.
She flapped a piece of paper in front of Elizabeth’s face. “Do you know about this! Do you! He’s gone!”
Elizabeth backed up apprehensively. Darcy was gone to London, and now only she was here to protect Emma from Lady Catherine. And when he came back, Lady Catherine would be told that he would not marry Anne, and every matter would become worse.
“I do not know.” Elizabeth apprehensively backed away.
Lady Catherine shouted, “Gone to London! London! He plans to betray me! I ordered him to stay! I ordered him to not leave till the wedding.” She stuck the paper in front of her face and read out in a sarcastic voice, “Gone to London on business. On business! Business! As though such a flimsy excuse will fool me. He plans to betray me! To find my source, and suborn the filthy betraying creature with money!”
“Mr. Darcy told me of a plan to go to London, but he shall return quickly.”
“Quickly? He won’t return at all. He has decided to betray me. To betray Anne. To betray us all. He has no honour. He has no prudence. He is nothing but a despicable creature, like his sister! I’ll force him to marry my daughter, no matter how he squirms! I have the proofs! I have them! I will show them!”
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bsp; Elizabeth nodded her head, making a furious pretense of agreement. She was really frightened. If Lady Catherine remembered that Darcy cared for her and Emma… Elizabeth felt like a mouse waiting for a cat to pounce.
Lady Catherine pumped her fist. “I shall beat him. I shall. I shall beat him yet. But you! Miss Bennet, I have never seen you look so subservient. It is in your eyes! You know you depend upon me. At last! I am most pleased with you at last. Go! — Do not forget, mine! You are mine! My employee, my dependent, my servant! Mine! You owe me gratitude. Not Darcy! Remember your place. Stay subservient.”
Elizabeth curtsied deeply, not looking directly at Lady Catherine, intentionally exaggerating the real fear she felt in her voice and manner. “Madam, I thank you. I swear, I shall be worthy of your condescension. I… I know Darcy shall not protect me.”
She backed away.
“Wait. For a little, I thought you were a whore like your sister. That you had become Darcy’s whore. It would not have surprised me greatly. I had believed better about you. I am glad I was right.” She waved her hand dismissively, letting the sides of her dressing robe flap about. “Go, go. I am done with you.”
Elizabeth bowed again. And she left the room, walking backwards, unable to stop keeping an eye on Lady Catherine, like a woman being presented to the queen.
Elizabeth then hurried silently down the hallway away from Lady Catherine’s room. She opened the door to the nursery and closed it immediately, as though that provided safety. She leaned her head against the door.
Her heart raced and the grief she felt because she had refused Darcy again was subsumed by fear of the old woman. It had been so easy to believe that she could stay here and protect Emma last night. But she was no longer sure.
You have no legal tie to her.
The memory of Darcy’s words cut her. She could only stay near Emma; she could not protect her. Nobody could. Lady Catherine was her legal guardian.
Emma walked up behind Elizabeth and touched her softly. “What is happening? What did Lady Catherine want?”
“Lady Catherine is raging. We must be very careful today.”
“Because Mr. Darcy is gone to London? But he will be back.”
“Yes,” Elizabeth replied somberly. “He will be back in a day or so.”
“Then why is Lady Catherine angry? Why does she even care? He has agreed to marry Miss Anne.”
Elizabeth took Emma in her arms and squeezed her. She needed to prepare the girl so that she understood when Darcy left Rosings permanently without them. “Lady Catherine is worried that Mr. Darcy does not want to marry Miss Anne, and that he will change his mind.”
“Oh.” Emma stamped her foot. “I hope he doesn’t marry her. Mr. Darcy is much too nice for meanie Annie.”
Elizabeth smiled sadly. “He is.”
“I wish…I wish he was marrying you instead of meanie Annie, and we would all go together to that estate that Mr. Darcy likes so much. Pemberley, and we would be like a family.”
“I wish that too.” Elizabeth squeezed Emma against her. “I wish that too.”
“Why are you crying?”
“Because I am sad.”
“You don’t want Mr. Darcy to marry Anne either, do you?”
“No, sweetheart. I do not.”
“Maybe he won’t. And then you could marry him.”
“But I would then have to leave you here. And I would never do that.”
“Oh.” Emma hadn’t thought about that before, apparently. “But Darcy is taking me to Pemberley. Remember.”
The little girl smiled confidently.
Elizabeth felt tears start from her eyes. She could not explain to Emma what would happen after Darcy returned. “Oh, yes. He is.”
Chapter Fifteen
Darcy was an experienced rider, and his horse was well trained. He simply directed it along the right road, and it kept a steady pace.
Clop, clop, clop.
The road to London was crowded with travelers. Young peasants walking back and forth, the occasional post carriage dragged by a team of two, once or twice some aristocrat racing past on an unsteady chariot with a team of four.
The air warmed as the hours passed, and Darcy had to stop several times to let his horse drink and rest, and to refresh himself. It was a beautiful sky with big white fluffy clouds sitting in a span of perfect blue. The trees around him were green, and there was a warm buzz of life everywhere, and he could not stop smiling.
Everything was still horrible.
Elizabeth had kissed him.
Darcy smiled.
Damn Lady Catherine. She was mad. Hang her. Hang her.
The horse felt Darcy’s tension and entered a faster trot. Darcy tried to breathe slowly to calm himself and he reined the horse in, since the road was still long and too crowded to go quickly.
His aunt. His mother’s sister. A human evil.
She could not be allowed to win. Giving her any victory was wrong. She had become a rabid dog, and he was family. It was his responsibility to defeat her. He needed to rescue Emma, and thus Elizabeth from her grasp, he needed to make it possible for Anne and Richard to marry, and he needed to protect Georgiana.
Darcy snorted. While he was at it, he could fly to the moon and retrieve some cheese from the surface.
But maybe this wasn’t impossible. Richard’s idea had seemed completely wrong the previous day, but now it began to grow on him. It would be a scandal, and a mockery of church and law. But if he and Anne pretended to marry, then they could all leave Rosings together and then once they were away from Rosings, the deceit could be announced and established. Richard and Anne could marry, and as Lady Catherine would already have given up her position as Emma’s guardian she would be able to do nothing.
If he and Elizabeth married first, any future marriage would be invalid. Of course then Lady Catherine would prosecute him for bigamy. But Darcy didn’t think the punishment would be particularly intolerable. He could ask his lawyer. Or they could find a different way to invalidate the marriage. One that was not illegal and quite so scandalous.
No matter what he did, Georgiana would still be exposed to Lady Catherine’s revenge.
As the day reached noon, the sun began to beat down, and the sweat poured down Darcy’s back. The houses and hamlets grew thicker. The road changed to cobblestones from the dirt and gravel of the turnpike. He’d reached London already. He smelled the thick fumes from the cesspits where the nightsoil was being cooked by the summer heat.
The traffic was thick and roiling. Hordes of people rushed from place to place, shouting and paying little heed. Pedestrians darted across the street at the slightest opening between wagons and horses, and Darcy had to sharply pull up to keep from trampling a person. The wagoneer behind him shouted in disgust.
Darcy’s stomach writhed with anxiety as he reached the tall marble and brick façade of his London townhouse. Georgiana and her companion Mrs. Annesley were there, preparing for the wedding to Chancey in another few weeks.
Before he searched out Wickham, he needed to tell Georgiana about Lady Catherine’s threats. He thought of how he’d hurt when Elizabeth had refused him. And now he needed to put his sister through the loss of a lover. He felt deep down certain that he would find a way to rescue Emma and Elizabeth from Lady Catherine’s grasp.
He did not see how he could protect his sister.
Darcy left his horse in the stables hired by his family a block from the house, and then he walked the rest of the way to the door. The ringer on the door was up, showing that Georgiana was not accepting visitors today. Darcy hoped she was still present at the house at least. Speaking to her would be a deeply unpleasant business, and he did not wish to delay it.
He unlocked the door with his key and entered quietly.
The butler came out of the servant’s room to greet him. “Mr. Darcy! We had no idea. Congratulations on your upcoming nuptials, sir! Why are you back so sudden?”
“Is my sister in?”
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sp; “She is in the breakfast room working on her correspondence. She will be delighted to see you. The party was to travel to Rosings for your wedding next week.”
Darcy nodded thanks and quickly walked to the breakfast room. His stomach begged him to not go forward, but he only used that emotion to propel himself to open the door.
Georgiana looked up from where she was seated next to Mrs. Annesley writing, and her face turned into a giant smile. Darcy’s eyes teared up when she threw her arms around him and hugged him fiercely.
“What do you do here! I am so glad to see you! Is Anne with you? You sent so few letters! I hardly know what to think. Tell me how it all happened. This has been so unexpected!”
“Georgie. Georgie…I...” Darcy held his sister out at arm’s length, and her smile faded away as she caught his expression.
“What is it? Something is wrong? I can see it. Just tell me.”
Darcy stood straighter. “There is a matter I must speak to you about.” He turned to Georgiana’s companion, “Mrs. Annesley, I am very pleased to see you, but—”
The woman rose and curtsied. “I understand. I do hope it is nothing too serious.”
Darcy made no reply to that, and she left the room.
Georgiana looked at him expectantly with a worried expression.
“I am not — I’ve decided I will not marry Anne.”
“Oh.” Georgiana nodded slowly with a confused expression. “What did she do — it shall be talked about a great deal — you would not do this lightly.”
“That…that is not what is important.” Darcy swallowed. “I never wished to marry her at all…”
“You didn’t!” Georgiana shook her head. “I am not surprised. I knew something strange was occurring. But why…”
“Forgive me, Georgie.”
“What is it? Tell me.”
“She knows about Wickham. Lady Catherine. When she learns I will not marry Anne, she will tell Lord Chancey, and everyone else in society about it. Except she will tell a far more vicious and lurid version than the truth.”
Georgiana stiffened and pulled away a little. Darcy could not look at his sister. The silence hung between them for a long time.
The Trials: A Pride and Prejudice Story Page 13