by Dilly Court
Shirley rose to her feet. ‘Do I look all right? My boobs are enormous after breast-feeding the baby. Thank goodness I’ve got him on the bottle now, but Laurence might think I look fat and blowsy.’
‘You look absolutely smashing. Stop worrying and go get him, sister.’
‘You spent far too much time hobnobbing with the Yanks.’ Shirley’s smile faded and she clapped her hand to her mouth. ‘I’m sorry, Ginnie. I didn’t mean to say that.’
‘It’s okay and I’m fine with it now, but what about you? I know how much you cared for Tony.’
Shirley’s eyes glittered diamond-bright and she shook her head. ‘There’ll never be anyone like Tony. I’ve had to accept that, but I swear to God that Laurence will never suffer for it. What I felt for Tony is buried here.’ She clutched her hand to her heart. ‘And that’s where he’ll stay forever, but I’ve got to go on living and I have to bring up my son. I’ll do anything it takes to give Colin a good start in life. Absolutely anything.’
‘I don’t know whether you’re being terribly brave or really stupid,’ Ginnie said, dashing tears from her cheeks. ‘But good luck, Shirley. I hope it works out for you and Laurence.’
Shirley took a final look in the mirror. ‘It will. It has to.’ She picked up her handbag and headed for the door.
Ginnie sank down on the edge of the bed, listening to the sound of Shirley’s footsteps as she ran down the stairs, followed by the thud of the front door closing behind her. The room seemed oddly silent and empty, but the scent of Shirley’s favourite perfume, Evening in Paris, lingered in the air and the pile of discarded clothes strewn all over the place was testament to her frantic search for an outfit that would have the desired effect on Laurence. Ginnie stood up and went to the window. She could see the pram in the back garden with its canopy raised to protect Colin from the sun, and she could just make out one chubby leg where the crocheted blanket had been kicked aside. He was a contented baby, and although it worried her that taking care of an infant was too much work for her mother, Mildred seemed to enjoy looking after him.
Ginnie glanced at her watch. It was time to go to work and she checked her appearance with a brief glance in the mirror as she hurried from the room. She did not want to be late opening the shop. It was her life now, and she was determined to make a success of it. Business was improving slowly and although she was not making a fortune she could earn enough to make the mortgage repayments on the house and pay the bills. There was little enough left for luxuries, but they had a roof over their heads and food on the table. It gave her a feeling of intense pride to be able to support her family, and the shabby shop was her own personal empire.
On Monday evening Shirley returned engaged and triumphant, although the ring she wore was a gold band with a gypsy-set diamond that was several sizes too large for her finger. She had secured it with a piece of chewing gum, which was a habit she had acquired from Tony.
‘Are you absolutely certain that this is the right thing for you?’ Ginnie asked anxiously when they were alone in Shirley’s room after a supper of Spam salad.
‘Yes, I am. We had a wonderful weekend,’ Shirley said happily. ‘Laurence was allowed out of the convalescent home and we stayed in the hotel. It was fun.’
Ginnie gave her a hug, but she could not help worrying. Shirley seemed certain that she could keep Tony’s memory in the sacred shrine of her heart, but Ginnie was not convinced. As for herself, Nick was never far from her thoughts and she was resigned to staying single. She had convinced herself that a career and marriage seldom went together, but she knew that Shirley thought differently. ‘I don’t want to be a wet blanket,’ she said tentatively. ‘But you don’t have to get married if you don’t want to. The shop is doing well and I’ve got plans for expansion. Fred Chinashop is thinking of retiring next year, and if I can make enough money to take over the lease and pay the ground rent, I might be able to persuade the landlord to knock through and make one large retail area, and I’ll be on my way to owning a department store. Bodger’s and Bearman’s look out, Ginnie Travis is on her way up.’
‘Good for you,’ Shirley said, holding her hand up and admiring the tiny diamond. ‘Laurence is going to buy me a proper ring as soon as he’s fit to leave the convalescent home, which could be as early as next week. He’s so looking forward to seeing Colin, and I know he’ll be a wonderful dad.’
‘Has it occurred to you that Colin might grow up to be the image of Charlie?’
Shirley frowned. ‘Don’t say things like that. I meant to say that I’m even more convinced that Colin’s his son now.’ She glanced at the sleeping baby in his cot beside her bed. ‘He’s got Laurence’s blue eyes.’
‘Don’t all babies have blue eyes?’
‘They might when they’re newborn, but Colin is almost five months old and they won’t change now, and he’s going to be fair, just like Laurence.’
‘Charlie had fair hair too, and blue eyes.’
‘His hair had a reddish tint and his eyes were paler blue. Why are you being like this, Ginnie? Don’t you want me to be happy?’
‘Of course I do. That’s why I want you to be absolutely certain that this is right for you and for Colin. You’re going to have a hard time from the Mallory family. They’re not likely to come round and give you their blessing.’
‘I don’t care, and if Laurence doesn’t mind, then why should I? We can do without the snooty Mallorys and their big house in Monk Avenue. Laurence is going to stay in the Navy and I’ll be a naval wife and go to all the cocktail parties and balls. We’ll probably live on the base and I won’t see an awful lot of you.’ Her happy smile faded. ‘You will be all right – running the shop on your own, I mean? I don’t want to leave you in the lurch, so to speak.’
‘I’ll try to manage,’ Ginnie said, smiling. ‘You have your own life to lead, Shirley. If what you’ll have with Laurence makes you happy then I’m happy too.’
‘And the war’s nearly over. It’s just a matter of weeks, so Laurence says. We’re going to get married in June. I want to be a summer bride so we’ll have to start looking for dresses. Maybe Avril could help because I haven’t any coupons left.’
‘We’ll manage something,’ Ginnie said, chuckling. ‘You’ll be a lovely bride.’
It was official. The war in Europe was finally over and people danced in the streets. Miles of bunting were resurrected from storage and bonfires blazed on common land throughout the country. Impromptu street parties were organised and the new era of peace began with jubilation and optimism, but that did not seem to have infiltrated as far as the house in Monk Avenue. The Mallory family declined their invitation to attend their son’s wedding at the register office in the middle of June.
Avril had travelled down from Shropshire the previous day bringing with her a creation in oyster slipper satin that had been made for her in Paris before the war. It might not have been the latest fashion now, but with a few minor alterations it fitted Shirley perfectly. Ginnie did her hair for her, twisting her sister’s blonde locks into a perfect victory roll and securing the tiny straw hat with a diamond hat pin on loan from Avril as the ‘something borrowed’. The hat, trimmed with cream silk roses and a wisp of a veil, had been an extravagance that Ginnie could justify on the grounds that it was gorgeous and might have been designed especially for Shirley to wear on her special day. Ginnie had squandered the last of her clothing coupons on it and paid the eye-watering price with a smile, even though she would have to forgo having her own shoes soled and heeled.
Mildred had been up early on the day, getting her slippers soaked with dew as she made a foray into the back garden to pick rosebuds for the wedding bouquet. Mrs Martin had baked a sponge cake using her entire week’s fat ration and powdered egg. She had borrowed a cardboard cover from the cake shop which looked like real icing, except that it was a little battered and worse for wear, having been used for almost every wedding in the parish since icing sugar became unobtainable. The cake, splendid in
its near pristine whiteness, had been taken to the King’s Arms where the party were to have the wedding breakfast. Ginnie suspected that the sandwiches and sausage rolls had probably been left over from one of the local street parties, but she hoped that no one would notice.
Laurence and Steven Carter, his fellow officer and best man, both resplendent in their uniforms, were waiting at the register office in the High Street when Ginnie arrived with Avril, having left Shirley to follow on with their mother who had insisted that she was going to take Sid’s place. ‘I know you don’t need to be given away in a civil ceremony, Shirley,’ she had said at breakfast. ‘But I want to walk you down the aisle so to speak. Your dad would be so proud of you if he could see you now.’
As they entered the room set aside for the nuptials, Avril nudged Ginnie in the ribs. ‘He’s a smashing-looking chap,’ she said, nodding in Laurence’s direction. ‘Shirley’s done well for herself.’
‘He’s lovely,’ Ginnie said sincerely. ‘I just hope they’re doing the right thing.’
‘It’s up to Shirley to make it work, but it’s never easy. Relationships are difficult at the best of times, and this one has had a shaky start.’
Ginnie glanced at Laurence and he smiled, but she knew intuitively that he was nervous. She murmured an excuse and left Avril to settle herself on one of the Rexine-covered chairs next to Ida and Fred Chinashop. She hurried over to him. ‘How are you, Laurence?’
‘Bearing up.’ He turned to his best man. ‘Steven, you haven’t met my future sister-in-law. Ginnie, this is my good friend Steven Carter.’
She smiled and shook his hand. ‘Nice to meet you, Steven.’
‘How do you do? I’ve heard a lot about you, Ginnie.’
‘Good or bad?’
‘All good.’
‘I don’t think that Laurence has known me long enough to discover my bad points.’
‘He sang your praises,’ Steven said easily.
She decided that he had a nice smile and candid brown eyes. He looked like the sort of man you could trust to take you home after a party without fear of being leapt upon in a dark alley. Not that that had ever happened to her, but Shirley seemed to have experienced several such encounters in her colourful past.
‘Never mind flirting with the maid of honour.’ Laurence glanced anxiously at the door. ‘Is she going to keep me waiting, Ginnie?’
‘She was ready when I left the house. Jimmy should be there now, that’s if he’s finished tying white ribbons on the furniture van. Ida spent all yesterday cutting an old sheet into strips, but I’m afraid it will look more like bandages than anything.’
‘This is more nerve-racking than steering a ship through a minefield.’ Laurence took Ginnie’s hand in his and looked deeply into her eyes. ‘I am doing the right thing, Ginnie. I want to make her happy; you know that, don’t you? But I worry that I’m rushing her into it, and I’ll be back at sea in a week’s time. Perhaps we ought to have waited.’
‘It’s pre-wedding jitters. I expect Shirley feels exactly the same.’
‘Where’s Colin?’ he asked, lowering his voice. ‘I hoped he would be here.’
‘We thought he might yell through the ceremony and drown out the registrar’s voice. He’s got a fine pair of lungs. Mrs Martin’s going to bring him to the reception.’
He tightened his grasp on her hand. ‘Thank you.’
‘For what? I haven’t done anything special.’
‘For being you. That American chap was out of his mind when he made his choice.’
She thought for a moment that he was teasing her but one look at his face and she knew that he was deadly serious. This was not the sort of conversation a man about to be married ought to have with his future sister-in-law. She withdrew her hand gently. ‘He was being honourable – just like you.’
‘At what cost?’ Laurence looked up as the doors opened and Shirley entered the room on her mother’s arm.
Ginnie hurried back to her seat, but for her the day was spoilt. It was cruel of Laurence to remind her of what she had lost. She had told him about Nick in the strictest confidence and he had chosen to mention him in front of Steven, who had turned away tactfully, but the damage was done. She felt that her private life had been dragged into the open, and, like a cut freshly exposed to the air – it hurt.
She took a deep breath and forced her lips into a smile as Shirley teetered past her on a pair of Avril’s high-heeled sandals, which were a couple of sizes too small. Like the Little Mermaid in Hans Andersen’s fairytale Shirley was smiling bravely, despite the pain she must be suffering. She walked up to Laurence and his serious expression softened as she whispered something in his ear.
The registrar cleared his throat. ‘Ladies and gentlemen, we have come here today . . .’
His voice droned on, rich and treacly as he enunciated each syllable in every word with the aplomb of a Shakespearean actor, but Ginnie was finding it hard to concentrate. Laurence’s casual mention of Nick had shaken her more than she cared to admit and she found her mind wandering during the brief ceremony, and she barely heard the responses.
And then it was over. Laurence kissed his bride and everyone applauded dutifully. Mildred shed a few tears and Avril clapped enthusiastically. Ginnie was not sure how she felt, but she managed a smile.
As soon as the formalities were over everyone trooped out of the building and walked the hundred yards down the street to the King’s Arms. Ginnie glanced anxiously into the shop window, resisting the temptation to go inside and find out how Jimmy was coping on his own. Fred Woollies had promised to look in on his way to the pub, but Ginnie could not help being concerned. She managed to contain her worries during the speeches and the inevitable toasts, and then Myra, who worked in the tobacconist’s shop next to Woolworth’s, sat down at the piano and began playing her rendition of Glenn Miller’s ‘Moonlight Serenade’.
Laurence and Shirley took the floor and everyone clapped them as they danced, keeping perfect time and moving as one person. ‘That’s a good sign,’ Avril whispered in Ginnie’s ear. ‘They’re physically simpatico, which bodes well for the wedding night.’
Ginnie glanced round, hoping that her mother and Mrs Martin were out of earshot. ‘You’re incorrigible, Avril.’
‘I know I am, but someone needs to liven up this dreadfully dreary crowd. You’d think this was a wake.’ She gripped Ginnie’s arm, jerking her head in Steven’s direction. ‘Why don’t you go and ask that dreamy naval officer to dance?’
‘I hardly know him.’
‘All the more reason to go and talk to him. The poor young man looks lonely standing there by the wedding cake, and he’s frightfully good-looking.’
‘I’ll have to leave soon. I promised Jimmy that he could come and join in the party before closing time, and to be honest I don’t trust him to lock up properly.’
‘Darling, it’s one thing to be a good businesswoman but don’t let that little shop become an obsession. You’re not twenty yet and you need to have some fun.’
‘All right. You win. I’ll go and talk to Steven, but then I’m going to the shop. I can’t swan off and leave my business as you obviously can.’
Avril pulled a face. ‘I’ve left Lionel in charge. Who could be better than a man of God to be left in charge of a pub? Anyway, I’m going home tomorrow, so he’ll be free to do the Lord’s work on Sunday, as usual.’
‘I hope there’s plenty of Scotch in the cellar,’ Ginnie said, grinning. ‘I seem to remember that Lionel was fond of a dram or two.’
‘I’d be a mean woman to begrudge him a little drink after closing time. Anyway, he’ll only have old Percy and a couple of locals to serve. Business has dropped off enormously since our American friends left.’
‘They’ve all gone?’
‘They packed up camp and left. Lightwood House is being refurbished at the US government’s expense and the owners will soon be back in residence.’ Avril sighed and shook her head. ‘The village will never be t
he same, although there are quite a few new additions to the population, and they won’t have an easy life coping with the stigma of illegitimacy.’ Realising what she had said, Avril gave a self-conscious giggle and patted Ginnie on the arm. ‘Obviously I’m not including Colin in that category. Shirley has found herself a good man and the boy will have a stable background. He’s one of the lucky ones.’
‘Yes, he is,’ Ginnie said, turning her head to look at her mother who was dandling Colin on her knee. ‘Shirley deserves to be happy.’
‘As you do, Ginnie. Now go and speak to that poor young officer who looks quite lost amongst your shopkeeper friends.’
‘All right, but don’t start match-making, Avril. I’m not interested.’ Ginnie made her way through the crowd to where Steven was standing with a glass of beer in his hand. ‘We’re neglecting you,’ she said apologetically.
‘Not at all. I like watching people when they don’t know that anyone is looking.’
‘Like animals in the zoo?’
He threw back his head and laughed. ‘No, not at all. If you’d spent as much time at sea as I have then you’d appreciate mixed company too.’
‘So you’re actually spotting the totty,’ she said, smiling mischievously.
‘Who could blame me for that? There are some very pretty girls here.’
‘Would you like me to introduce you to some of them? That’s Myra playing the piano, and that girl over there, the redhead, is her sister Doris. They’re both unattached as far as I know.’
‘And what about you, Ginnie? Are you involved with anyone?’
‘No, I’m too busy to think about things like that. The shop takes up all my time.’
‘Everyone needs a break now and again. May I have this dance, Miss Travis?’
She had intended to palm him off on tall, athletic Doris, or toothsome Pearl who served on the sweet counter in Woolworth’s, but his smile was genuine and she had not the heart to refuse. ‘Thank you, I’d love to.’ To her surprise she meant it, and it was pleasant to feel a man’s arms around her as they joined the couples on the dance floor. When the music stopped he kept hold of her hand.