by L. Michael
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Two days later, I was sitting at my favorite bar, pouring out my soul to my good friend Des. I told him all about the adorable guy I met at work.
“Do you think I'm stupid for wanting to buy him some happy looking posters for his walls?”
I watched Des glide behind the bar serving his other customers. I met Des while I was working a hate crime in the LGBTQ community. During that investigation, I found out Des is a Daddy Dom, and he owned a unique gay bar near my home. He helped me get some leads in the case, and we became good friends. When Des told me about his Daddy/Little nights every Wednesday, I was hooked. I tried to make it every week. It was nice to get together with other people in the lifestyle. I’ll admit I had gone through some dark times when I avoided the bar because it made me sad watching others so happy. But tonight, I needed Des’s advice about a certain Little Boy. So here I was at the bar, getting help from Des.
“You're a Daddy. You have a strong feeling that he is a Little Boy. It´s not stupid if you want to buy him cute happy pictures to try to woo him.”
“Woo him, Des. What is this the 1800’s?”
“You want to make an impression and convince him to be yours, right?” I nodded, so he continued, “Then you need to woo him, court him, do whatever it takes.”
“But for his office?”
“You said it yourself. The office walls are so grey.” Des grinned and sat a glass of wine in front of me. “Seriously, Jake. Just buy him something. Make a connection.”
“Maybe, I will.” I could not stop thinking about him. We had seen each other in passing at the station, but we hadn't spoken. Still, my heart skipped a beat every time I saw that cute man. I was a goner. He was adorable, and I couldn’t wait to make him mine.
“You like him? You're already making plans for him.”
“What?” I looked up at Des, who was grinning at me like a maniac. “I barely know him.”
“Come off it, Jake. I know that look. You’re like a dog with a bone. You will not let him go until he is yours.”
Des was right. I WAS making plans and would not stop until Sam was mine.
“Yeah, okay, okay, you’re right. I like Samuel. He's adorable and…” I glanced at the door, and the last person I expected to see stepped into the bar. “And he's here.”
“What?” Des turned around to look at Samuel.
“What is he doing here?”
“That guy? He came in here yesterday evening, asking if anyone could attend the Daddy/Little Evening. He said he´s new in town and wants to meet others in the lifestyle.”
“Oh. Right. Good.” Seeing him here at the Rainbow Room and hearing, he was interested in meeting people just confirmed my thoughts. He was a Little. Could it also mean that he was looking for a Daddy? If that was the case, I was going to make damn sure I ended up as Samuel’s Daddy. In that moment I was more determined to make Sam mine.
I was still trying to decide if I should go over to him when Samuel spotted me. He paled and stepped back so quickly that he fell over his own feet and landed on his butt. I was by his side in an instant.
“God, are you alright? Did you hurt yourself? Come on, let me help you up.”
“N-No… pl-please…”
He flinched away from me and tried to curl into a ball. I reached out my hand and gently touched his shoulder. “Hey, it's okay. I just want to help you up.”
“I… please… don´t… don´t...”
It took me a second to realize that Samuel was scared that I was going to hit him. Suddenly the conversation with Captain Benson made perfect sense. The officers had bullied and harassed him for weeks. Then the two jumped him after he had been grocery shopping. I reached out and softly brushed my fingers down his cheek.
“Poor Boy. They found out that you´re a Little, didn’t they?”
“What?” He peeked up through his thick eyelashes at me.
“Those officers in Boston. They found out that you´re a Little, and that's why they beat you, right?” For a second, Samuel simply stared up at me, then his eyes filled with tears, and he nodded slowly. “Come on, Sweet Boy. Let´s get you off the floor and then we can sit down and talk, okay?”
Chapter 2
Samuel
Deep breath in and out. You can do this. You already met the owner, and he was kind. This is a safe place. I told myself as I stood in front of this cool gay bar I found. The pep talk eased my nerves a bit.
The Rainbow Room. I seriously thought it was a gag, but I looked it up and found out it was a real bar. Not a regular bar, nope, it was a gay bar. Gay pride flag was a rainbow, and a gay bar called the Rainbow Room. Ironic right? I loved it. It had taken a few days, but I gathered my courage and visited the bar. I met the owner, who was a massive bear of a man, but so nice. It was busy last night when I visited so that he was not able to talk too much. While I was sitting at the bar watching the crowd, I spotted a flyer for a special night. “Daddies and Littles Night.” “Embrace your rainbow and join this fun group.” “Every Wednesday.” I flagged down the owner, and he confirmed it was a fun night.
“You should join us. You can be yourself,” the owner said and winked at me. He disappeared before I could ask him what he meant. Be myself. That sounded like a dream. What would it be like to be myself? Well, I was a needy Little who loved cuddles and wanted a Daddy.
After the attack and new job, I was really tried to tone down my office and outfits. You know, be more “normal.” But being Little was so much of who I was that it was hard to tone it down. I mean there is no switch to just shut it off. I mean, once I started to add cute things to my office, I just couldn’t stop. I put out one animal than another until it snowballed.
So far, everyone had been open and welcoming, especially Jakob Lannister, the hot detective who had come to my office. Jakob Lannister. My heart skipped a beat, and I felt a flutter in my tummy every time I thought of him or saw him. He was a dream come true, tall, dark hair and warm, kind, brown eyes. Swoon-worthy. His white dress shirts did nothing to hide his broad shoulders and muscular arms. Oh my, he was yumminess on a stick. He seemed so genuine. He said he was gay, but what would he think about me being a Little? When he commented on my desk, my Daddy-dar starting pinging. Hmmm? Was a Daddy-dar a thing? Well, if it was a thing or not, it didn’t matter. Based on my research, I could tell what I wanted from my Daddy, and in my dreams, Jakob would be a perfect Daddy.
It took me ages to pick out what to wear because I wanted to look good just in case. I was wearing one of my favorite Snoopy t-shirts, soft jersey shorts, and my rainbow converse. I took one more deep breath, opened the door, and stepped into the bar. I was nervous but so excited.
Buuuuut, of course, my life was tragic. Who was the first person I spotted when I walked in the door? Hot detective, Jakob Lannister. Of all the people in the world, why did it have to be him? As soon as Jakob Lannister saw me, my courage fled. My fight or flight instincts kicked in, and I had to run away because this could only end in disaster, right? But I tripped and fell on my ass. I ended up huddled in a ball on the floor as Hot Detective loomed over me. Instinct had me covering my head and waiting for the incoming strike. After nothing happened, I peeked up through my lashes at Jakob.
“Poor Boy. They found out that you're a Little, didn’t they?”
“What?”
“Those officers in Boston. They found out that you´re a Little, and that's why they beat you, right?” For a second, I simply stared up at him. He knew. Then my eyes filled with tears, and I slowly nodded. “Come on, Sweet Boy. Let´s get you off the floor and then we can sit down and talk, okay?”
“Wait. What? Why?”
“Samuel, I´m not one of those scum bags. I’m not going to hit you because you like special things. Besides. Why do you think I´m here tonight?”
Hmmm. That was a good question. I thought about it. We were in a gay bar, and it was Daddy/Little evening. Jakob Lannister was here.
“Oh. Ohh. OHHH.” That could
only mean one thing. He was a Daddy. Blinking, I stared up at him. I swear angels started to sing. He. Was. A. Daddy.
Jakob chuckled at me and held out his hand. “Come on now. Let me help you up.”
I grabbed his hand and let him haul me off the floor. Instead of letting me go, Jakob ran his hands up and down my arms, and he turned me around. Such a Daddy thing to do.
“Are you ok? Did you hurt yourself?”
“No. No, I’m ok.”
“Good. Now, shall we sit down and talk?”
“I… Yes, I would like that.” Jakob directed me to a small booth, far away from the other people in the bar. I counted maybe fifteen people in total. I quickly recognized a few Littles because some wore cute cartoon shirts or bright colored shoes. A few were sitting in other men’s laps. Most of them had sippy cups and color books on their tables. I felt like I fit in when I saw one of the Little Boy’s had a shirt that said `Daddy’s boy.’ It helped me relax. Seeing that shirt brought me back to college.
In college, I took a Human Sexuality class that had me internally asking a lot of questions. I mean, I knew I liked boys before I knew what it meant. But this class discussed BDSM and the subcultures of submission and dominance in sexuality. It was the first time I heard the term Age Play. In that class, there was a guy who wore a shirt that said, ‘Daddy’s Boy.’ I overheard him in the hall after class one day talking about his Daddy and having a playdate. I had to know more. So, I used my tech skills to find out all I could about Age play, Daddy’s, and Little Boys. Then I stumbled onto books and stories about Age Play. My e-reader quickly filled with every book I could find. Today it had all my favorites, especially books by Little Boy Blue.
All that research and reading helped me to compile a list of what I wanted in my perfect Daddy. So far, Jakob had already matched several vital points on that list. Jakob was confident, caring, and had a strong Daddy vibe. And we hadn’t said more than a few words to each other.
“I can introduce you to the others later if you like. But first, I'd like to talk to you alone.”
“Okay.” I looked at Hot Detective Daddy again. He had a light blue t-shirt that looked like he painted it on. It did nothing to hide all his muscles. “So. Um. You, um. Do you come here often?”
That made Jakob laugh out loud. My eyebrows shot up, and I tilted my head. Had I said something funny, or was he making fun of me?
“Sorry, Sweet Boy, I am not laughing at you. That question. ‘Do you come here often?’ That must be the oldest pick-up line ever, and it sounded funny when you asked it. But I guess it is an appropriate question. Yes, I do come here often. I try to be here every Wednesday. I have several friends in the lifestyle.”
“That´s what I hoped to find,” I admitted quietly. “I mean. I want to meet people and maybe make a friend.”
“That is a good idea. Being new in the city, you should meet people and have lots of friends. It stinks to be lonely.”
Jakob smiled at me, then looked at the man approaching our table.
“Speaking of friends, let me introduce you to a good friend, the owner of the Rainbow Room. Samuel, this is Desmond Hayes. Des, meet Samuel Baker.”
“I couldn´t believe that a gay bar was named The Rainbow Room until I saw the sign.” I said without thinking, then blushed and ducked my head. “I´m sorry. I didn´t mean to be rude.”
“That is far from rude, sweetie. When I opened the bar back in the eighties, I wanted to make a statement. And boy, did I ever. I wanted to create a place for people to come and hang out and be themselves. Now, what can I get you to drink? Something regular or do you want some juice or milk? You can even choose the color of your sippy cup if you want.”
“I can?” I looked at Jakob, who smiled and nodded.
“Sure. Choose whatever you want.”
“Can I have some apple juice, please? In a yellow cup?”
“You got it, sweetie. I´ll bring out our special menu as well.”
“They have a special menu?” I asked as soon as Des left.
“Yep, it makes Wednesday night very popular. It lets Daddies and Littles be themselves without anyone scrutinizing them.”
“Wow.” It sounded nice. To have a place where you could be Little while you ate. Des was back in no time carrying my yellow sippy cup, two cards, and a glass of wine for Jakob. I loved that I got apple juice, while Jakob drank his grown-up wine. It helped me slip further into my Little space.
“Thank you, Mr. Hayes.”
“You are very welcome Little Boy. Let me know when you´ve decided.”
“Thank you.” I said again, then I looked at the menu. There were all sorts of yummy foods listed. I was so nervous about showing up at the Rainbow Room that I had not eaten all day, so I was hungry. Cheeseburgers, meatloaf, macaroni and cheese, spaghetti, pizza, chicken nuggets. I was drooling. Then I got to the bottom of the page. Oh my gosh, they had desserts too. There was ice cream, fruit salad, cookies, and yogurt.
“Can I have some chicken nuggets with fries and ice cream, please?” Oh my, had I just asked him for food? I clamped my mouth shut and ducked my head. Embarrassed, I could feel my cheeks heat up. Then, I felt fingers on my chin that picked my head up. Jakob looked at me and smiled.
“How about this. If you get a salad with your nuggets, then you can have ice cream. How does that sound?”
I nodded and bit my lip. Would Jakob care? He didn't mind when I asked if I could have a sippy cup or when I asked for my food.
“Could you…I mean, would you…” I stopped. I just couldn’t get the question out, but Jakob seemed to know what I wanted.
“Would you like me to order for you?”
“I…Yes…I mean, do you mind?”
“I don’t mind at all. I would like that very much.”
I watched Jakob order my food. My tummy flipped, and I smiled like a loon. Jakob ordering for me felt terrific. Yes, ok, I’ll admit that I even liked that he made sure that I got some vegetables as well.
“Thank you.” I said again after Des took our order.
“You are very welcome. Thank you for letting me order for you. I liked that very much.”
“Because you're a Daddy.”
“Yes, because I am a Daddy. Look, Samuel, I didn't mean to scare you earlier. I just wanted to help you off the floor.”
“I’m sorry. It was just… I… sometimes I freak out and overreact, because of what happened. I can't help it.”
“Can you tell me what happened?”
“You already figured it out.”
“I did, but I would like you to tell me in your words.”
“I…” I shrugged and sighed, but Jakob cleared his throat. He was not going to let this go. I opened my mouth and was surprised at what came out.
“Some of the guys at the precinct made fun of me. They said I´m not a real cop. And they picked on me for being gay. After a while, most of the guys got tired of teasing me. But two of them never let up. They were just mean and cruel. So, I reported them. They got suspended, and at first, I thought they learned their lesson. But then…” The memories of that night flooded back. “I was shopping for my groceries. I um, I bought some stuff I liked, and they saw me.”
“Sam, would you like to sit next to me?” Jakob asked when I stopped again. “It may give you some comfort.”
Without giving it a second thought, I got up and went around the table and crawled into the booth next to Jakob. I wriggled as close as I could without being in his lap. I leaned against Jakob and closed my eyes. After a moment, I felt a strong arm around my shoulder.
“Then, what happened?” he asked quietly as he slowly rubbed my arm.
“I saw them following me in the store. I hurried so I could get away but, they followed me outside. I tried to run down this alley, but they um,” I shivered as I remembered the attack. “They started to shove me and call me names. Then they dumped my grocery bags on the floor. After they saw that I bought some stuff for my Little side, they started beating me,
yelling at me, telling me that I´m a pervert and a freak. It hurt so much. But then a man walking by the alley stopped them.”
“Oh, sweet boy, come here.”
Jakob wiped the tears from my face. Huh? When did I start crying? Jakob pulled me onto his lap and wrapped me in his arms. I buried my face in his chest, and I felt my emotional dam burst. I cried for all the hurt the two men had caused, and all the while, Jakob held me. Wow, I had no idea I had all this built up inside me. Jakob just held me while I sobbed. It seemed like the tears went on forever. I just couldn’t stop. After my tears finally stopped, I took a deep breath and rested my cheek against his chest. “I was in the hospital for a week. After I got out of the hospital, I couldn´t go back to work. I would have a panic attack when I thought about going back. I was afraid that they told everyone, so I requested a transfer.”
“Thank you for telling me.”
“You already knew.”
“Yes, I figured it out when I saw your reaction, but I had no idea what exactly had happened,” Jakob said, as he stroked his hand over my back. “Captain Benson and the Chief asked me to mentor you to make sure that you settle in.”
“They asked you to mentor me?” I raised my head and looked into his kind eyes and enjoyed his warm smile.
“Yes. And I’m glad I accepted. After all, I am the best person for the job.” I giggled, and Jakob raised an eyebrow at me. “What?”
“Do they know that you're a Daddy?”
“My partner does, yes, but I don’t think Captain Benson does. I guess he just figured that I would be good for you because he sees me as a caretaker and mentor.” Jakob shrugged, and I giggled again.
“If he only knew how right he is.”
“I'm glad you think so. But work has nothing to do with us having dinner. I am not on duty right now.”
“Oh?” I hadn't thought about that. Jakob couldn't have known that I was going to be here tonight. “Then why are we having dinner together?”