A knock on the doorjamb brought them out of their reverie, and Harper shot off Bennett’s lap. Darren looked worn down, his eyes red rimmed, but the ghost of a smile touched his lips. “Sorry to interrupt. I was hoping—if it’s not too much trouble—you’d run me up to the hospital to see Allison and the kids.”
“Course not. You feel steadier?” Bennett asked.
A real smile manifested itself, although it was dry. “You mean, am I getting ready to off myself?”
“Well, yeah.” Bennett only shrugged.
“No.” He held up a white envelope, his hand trembling. “Alex suggested I read the letter I wrote to Allison. Tell her everything. I’m not sure she wants to hear it or if she can handle it, though.”
Harper exchanged a telling glance with Bennett. She touched the back of Darren’s hand. “Allison is the strongest woman I know. She can handle it and then some. Tell her. Trust her.”
Darren nodded, and Harper hoped he would have the strength to follow through and share his burdens with Allison. She followed the two men to Bennett’s truck and wondered if it was training or birth that set men who chose to be SEALs apart. Their independence and mental steel was both a strength and a weakness. When times got more than they could bear, it was nearly impossible for them to ask for help.
At the hospital, the transparent relief on Allison’s face before she pulled Darren into her arms portended what was to come. Somehow she seemed to sense how close she’d come to losing him for good.
“Y’all go talk. Bennett and I will hang out with the kids.” Harper tried to impart to Allison without words how important this moment was. Allison hung on to Darren’s hand and nodded.
After they retreated to a small chapel to talk, Harper pasted on a smile and picked up the pack of cards on a rolling table. “Did you guys know that we have a trickster in our midst?”
Sophie pushed taller on the pillows, her eyes big and blue against all the hospital white, including the bandage that wrapped her head like a turban. “W-who?”
She held out the cards to Bennett. “Let’s see what you’ve got, Grizzly.”
Bennett entertained them for more than half an hour. Even Libby was transfixed by the sleight-of-hand tricks. Bennett was a natural with the kids.
He’ll make a good father. As soon as the thought popped into her head, a blush spread like wildfire, and she flapped her shirt to keep from breaking out into a sweat. They hadn’t discussed the future, but much like she’d known Noah would be an important part of her life the day they’d met, she knew Bennett was here to stay.
The implications were obvious but too startling to examine.
“Hey. You okay over there?” Bennett had backed away from the bed and was shuffling the cards from one hand to the other.
“Just peachy,” she said with a forced smile.
“W-will you…”—Sophie struggled for long seconds with the next word—“t-tell me a story, Harper?”
“Of course I will. What would you like to hear about? Sleeping Beauty? Rapunzel?” Harper lay down on her side in the bed with Sophie, careful not to jostle the IV or tubes.
“N-no princesses.” Sophie didn’t meet her eyes as she played with the end of Harper’s ponytail.
“How about a story about a little girl who’s strong and brave and tames a dragon even though no one thinks she can?”
Sophie smiled and nodded, settling against Harper’s chest. Harper closed her eyes and let a story ramble from her mind to her mouth. She wasn’t sure how long she talked, but after she uttered the final “and she lived happily ever after” the silence that followed was peaceful. Sophie was lax and breathing deeply, Libby and Ryan were sitting close to the bed staring at Harper raptly, and Bennett leaned against the wall wearing a slight smile.
She slipped out of bed, careful not to wake Sophie, and whispered, “How about we go get some ice cream downstairs?”
Libby shook her head. “I think I should stay. In case she wakes up. I don’t want her to be afraid.”
“I’ll stay, too.” Ryan scooched his chair closer to Sophie’s bed.
Harper and Bennett retreated to the hallway, but she kept her eye on the kids. She had to believe they would get through this with scars but no lasting wounds.
With the walls and secrets swept aside, Harper didn’t hesitate to notch herself into Bennett’s arms. Burying her face in the warmth of his neck, she inhaled, and like he’d imprinted on her, her heart recognized home.
“They’re coming.” His chest rumbled against her.
She shifted but didn’t pull away. Allison had been crying—Darren too. “What do you need?” Harper directed her question to Allison.
“Prayers?” Allison gave a little laugh. Although she seemed lighter and reconnected with her husband, the road back to a new normal would be long and difficult.
“I appreciate everything you’ve done, man.” Darren dropped Allison’s hand to clasp Bennett’s in a shake. Instead, Bennett pulled Darren into a bear hug.
“I wish I’d been there for you sooner. We all have our ways of coping, I guess. What’s your plan?”
“I want to see my little girl home, and then I’m going to take a leave of absence and work out my problems or at least learn to manage them. Alex said he’d help. He also invited me to the survival weekend he’s put together with you.”
“Good. I was going to suggest that myself.”
While the men discussed particulars of the trip, Harper pulled Allison to the side. “Are you two going to be okay tonight?”
“‘Okay’ might be overstating things, but I think—I hope—we’ve reached a turning point. The things he told me, I can’t imagine … But I’m glad he trusted me.” Allison squeezed her mouth closed, her chin wobbling. “How close was he to finishing it?”
“The gun wasn’t loaded, if that’s any consolation.” Harper rubbed circles on Allison’s back like she did for Ben when he woke from a nightmare. Unfortunately, Allison’s nightmare was all too real.
“Maybe it shouldn’t, but that does make me feel better.”
“What happens now?”
“Darren is going to stay with Sophie. He’ll be safe here. I’ll take the kids home and try to get a decent night’s sleep. Tomorrow is a new day.” Allison flashed a brief watery smile before looking to the floor. “I appreciate everything you’ve done for me and Darren and the kids. I don’t know what I would do without you.”
“You won’t have to find out. And I’ll be back and forth for the opening of the café. Let me know if I can watch the kids or take you out to vent or whatever. Call or text me in the morning.”
Bennett slipped an arm around her shoulders and Darren retreated to Sophie’s bedside. Allison joined him, her hand on his shoulder.
“I guess that’s it,” Harper whispered.
“For now.”
They didn’t speak again until they were outside. Even though the children’s wing of the hospital did its best to be open and welcoming, tension was sloughed away by the swaying trees and endless night sky. Relief coupled with worry, but she and Bennett had done everything in their power to help. It was up to Darren to fight for his life both literally and abstractly.
“What do you want to do? We could get a hotel room for the night or drive back.”
Part of her longed for the privacy of a night together after the turmoil of the day. But a driving need to be with Ben when he woke seeded impatience.
She pulled Bennett to a stop and met his gaze. “As much as I want to frolic all night in a king-size bed with you, I need to be home.”
“Because of Sophie.” It was a statement, not a question.
“Yes and because of how I left things this morning with Ben.”
“With Ben and Sophie close in age and seeing her … like that. It’s scary.”
He was right. Call it mother’s instinct, but she needed to make sure Ben was safe. “You don’t mind?”
“As long as I can get a rain check. I don’t know that I�
�ve ever frolicked in bed, but as long as it involves you naked, I’m all in.”
Harper muffled laughter. Bennett was a surprise on so many levels, not least of all the sly, sexual tease in his voice.
“Rain check it is.”
“But I’d also be good with some covert action in the dead of night if you’re up for it.”
“I might be up for hunting bear later.” She popped to her toes to press a kiss on his smiling mouth. “Grizzly.”
Chapter 24
Two months later …
Harper paced next to the coffee roaster in the back of the café. It was five in the morning opening day of Home Front Coffee. Sleep had been not just elusive but nonexistent. The aroma from the roaster filled the room. She and Joyce and Madeline had roasted countless small batches of beans, ground them, made coffee, and sampled it. They had agreed the medium dark roast was the most appealing. Eventually, Home Front might offer a variety of roastings, but keeping it simple at the start held its appeal.
Fresh beans for the first customers would be good PR. Except what if no one showed up? What if her tiny venture folded in Guinness world record time?
Thinking about the possibilities made her sick. Literally. On her run to the bathroom, she hit her shoulder on the doorjamb, fell to her knees in front of the toilet, and heaved. She cleaned up and rinsed her mouth out with water. The lights emphasized her sallow complexion and dark circles under her eyes. She’d been sick with nerves for the last week and tired. So tired. Stress was a killer.
One way or another, she’d feel better after today. It was the not knowing if her business plan was amateurish or brilliant or something in between that was taking a toll. The turn of the lock out front brought her out of the bathroom. Madeline had arrived. Energy and good humor and optimism crackled around her. Harper wanted to give her a hug. Without Madeline, Harper might have given up.
Madeline took a deep breath and hummed. “You’ve already got the roaster going. It smells divine in here.”
“I couldn’t sleep.”
Madeline’s smile didn’t infect Harper. “I know. I’m excited, too.”
Instead of admitting her mood had shifted toward the dread end of the scale, she said, “Do you think I ordered too many bakery items?”
The bakery across the street had provided muffins and scones and coffee cake to Home Front Coffee at wholesale prices. In return, the bakery would stock bags of freshly roasted Home Front Coffee in their bakery for a tidy profit. Hopefully, a win-win in terms of advertising and making a name for themselves.
“You ordered the perfect amount. T-minus one hour. Let’s put several of each on display. We can restock as we sell out.” Madeline’s enthusiasm only made Harper feel like a Jenga tower one turn away from collapse.
She went into the back where a corner of the storeroom had been commandeered as office space. A safe held the petty cash she’d taken out of the bank to load the register. After she did that, she checked and rechecked the credit card reader link. Considering how few people carried cash these days, a malfunction would be disastrous. She still had nightmares about the defective machine at Wilbur’s when she worked at the ice-cream store during the summers.
Two young wives from the military support group knocked on the door. While Madeline and Harper’s job was to put out the inevitable fires and man the roaster the first day in operation, Harper had hired the two women to handle the behind-the-counter work. Both had experience as waitresses and in retail, plus they were friendly and excited about working at Home Front. Joyce would come toward the end of the shift and help with closing out the register and deciding what they needed to reorder and when.
Madeline let the two women inside and they put on aprons and chattered while they prepared for the opening. Allison was the next to arrive. She and Harper exchanged hugs.
The two months following Sophie’s release from the hospital had brought stability and healing to Allison and Darren and their family. Darren still struggled with PTSD, but through the combination of medicine, his Wounded Warriors group outings, and Allison’s support, he was managing his anxiety and depression.
Harper retreated to the coffee roaster. The smell of coffee was usually her morning siren song, but she couldn’t quell the roil of her stomach. The roasting cycle was complete and the beans were cooling. Some they would use that morning, and some they would bag to sell.
Allison joined her at the roaster. “Almost time, Boss.”
Oh God, she was in charge. The pressure threatened to crush her. She took a deep breath, but the freshly roasted coffee made her choke. She slapped a hand over her mouth and, knowing she wouldn’t make it to the bathroom this time, scurried around boxes for the back door. She made it by an inch. Not that she had anything left but bile.
She returned, feeling wrung-out and put-up wet. “Sorry. I’m battling a severe case of nerves.”
The worry on Allison’s face was replaced by amusement. “Oh, is that what it is? I thought you might be pregnant.”
Harper made a scoffing noise, but a roar had filled her ears, muffling whatever else Allison said. Pregnant? She couldn’t be. It was impossible. Yet was it?
She and Bennett hadn’t been able to keep their hands off each other the last two months. Sure, they had been careful, but there was that one time on a secluded dirt road. Serious frolicking had taken place in the cab of his truck. Anyone could have driven by. It had been on the edge of wild and reckless, and she’d loved every minute.
When was her last period? It wasn’t something she normally tracked. They were irregular and on the light side, anyway. Had it been more than four weeks? Maybe.
At some point, Harper’s inattention registered with Allison. “Harper! Are you pregnant?”
“I don’t know.” She must have looked like she felt—scared, shell-shocked, but with a hint of wonder, too.
“Well, bless your heart.” Allison said it in a non-ironic way and seemed to possess knowledge Harper lacked.
“A baby is really unlikely.”
“Is it? You’re still young, and Bennett has been rocking your panties off for months now.” She waggled her eyebrows.
Harper shushed her between clenched teeth. Her stomach was trying to tear its way out of her body like in Alien. “What should I do?”
“Let’s have a great opening day. Then, we’ll grab a pregnancy test and some pizza on the way home.”
“I meant, long term if it turns out…” Harper already knew what the pregnancy test would say, and she’d been a fool not to suspect earlier.
“Tell Bennett. You don’t think he’s going to be excited?”
“He brought up marriage about a month ago.”
Allison grabbed her hands. “In general or specifically related to the two of you getting married?”
“Specifically us.”
“What did you say? Obviously, not yes, or he would have put a ring on it already.”
“It felt like less of a yes-no situation and more like he was feeling me out. Like he didn’t want to outright ask if I wasn’t open to the idea.”
“And are you?”
“Of course I am. I love him, but we haven’t been together long, and he’s never wanted to settle down.”
“That’s because he was waiting for you.” Even though Allison was only a couple of years older than Harper, she possessed a wisdom that far outstripped her. “How did you leave things?”
“I did some babbling about Ben and needing time and went to the bathroom to regroup.”
Allison burst out laughing. “Smooth.”
Madeline stuck her head through the connecting door. “It’s time, ladies.”
Harper grabbed Allison’s wrist as she was turning toward the door. “I’m scared.”
She wasn’t sure if she was referring to the prospect of an unplanned pregnancy or the opening of Home Front. In a few short months, her easy, boring life had been upended, by chance and choice.
“I know. But isn’t it exciting?” A sl
ow grin spread across Allison’s face.
Now threaded alongside her nerves was excitement. The possibility for failure hovered, but she would reach for success, both personally and professionally. “Yeah, I guess it is.”
They entered the café side by side. Two customers stood at the counter ordering coffee, while a carload of four more people in office attire piled inside, their chattering filling the space.
The next eight hours went by at warp speed. When two o’clock rolled around, Harper flipped the sign to Closed and pulled the shade on the front door. Until the shop got its footing and she could hire and train more wives from the base, they would close after lunch.
It was another two hours before she and Joyce had balanced the register and cleaned up, readying everything for the next morning. They’d had more customers than she’d anticipated, which was good, but Joyce needed to up their order for bakery items the next morning.
“I’m exhausted.” Harper stretched her back as they stepped out into the hot pre-summer sun.
“You stop at a pharmacy, and I’ll head home and order pizza.” Allison gave her a pointed look.
Harper did as she was told, then drove to Allison’s, glancing periodically at the small box on her passenger seat like it was an unexploded bomb.
It was like an evil witch’s curse had been lifted off Allison and Darren’s house. Sophie and Libby were playing dress up and chasing each other up and down the stairs. Darren was in the backyard throwing soft underhanded pitches to Ryan, their laughter carrying through the screen door to the back patio. Allison flipped the pizza box open and glanced over her shoulder as Harper walked in.
“Go take it before the kids descend on the kitchen like locusts.”
Harper slipped into the powder room and ripped the package open. Peeing on the stick was an uncomfortable, messy affair. She capped it and washed her hands, staring at the little window. Her future might change in a matter of minutes.
The seconds ticked off. Light blue appeared. She picked up the stick and blinked. A plus. She was pregnant. Not surprising, but shocking nonetheless. Her already-complicated life was about to get more tangled.
The Military Wife Page 28