“You could always pick up the bottle and read it for us.”
There was a hush of silence.
Claire looked over at Beckett, her eyes wide.
He looked scared.
“What?”
Julian wasn’t backing down. The man was part of their team, and he needed to own it. Bethany had told them he could help out, so he needed to suck it up and do it.
It was time.
“Pick it up, tell us what you feel. You know…read it.”
After the wave of fear from knowing his secret was out, there was the anger.
And then rage.
He had no one to point it at but the one person who could have told Julian his deepest darkest secret. At some point, Claire had betrayed him, doing exactly what she promised not to do.
He was so hurt.
Angry.
Betrayed.
Turning, he focused all his bitterness at her. “You promised,” he hissed, moving away from her body like her touch burned him. “I trusted you, Claire. You gave me your word!”
She went to say something, but he cut her off.
“I told you how much I needed to believe in you, and you told them after you swore to me!”
“But I…”
“I see how much I meant to you, Claire. I’m so sorry I trusted you. That I believed in you. I regret ever meeting you.”
His heart ached.
Here it went again, slashed to ribbons by the opposite sex when he least expected it. All trust drained from his body.
“Beckett, I…”
Again, the rage rose up.
“NO! Don’t even come near me or talk to me. We’re done. Whatever we could have had just died. You killed it, Claire. You destroyed it with your betrayal.”
Her eyes filled with tears at his vicious words.
She was so shocked that she couldn’t think straight. In her heart, she knew it wasn’t her. Claire wanted to prove it to him, but he was so angry.
He’d never believe her.
Not in a million years.
Beckett was only seeing what he always expected. He wasn’t the one betrayed. She was. He never trusted her at all. After all she did to protect him, he still believed she was capable of such a thing.
It hurt her beyond words.
“All I want to know is when did you do it, Claire?” he blurted. “Was it when I fell asleep before I trusted you enough with my heart? Was it right before we made love?”
Tori’s hand went to her husband’s arm. They were watching a very private train wreck. It was uncomfortable, and frankly, something had to be done to stop it.
Julian felt horrible.
Had he known that they had this pact, he never would have said anything.
“Beckett,” he said, trying to calm the man down.
“No! Don’t defend her! It’s over Claire. I never want to even see or speak to you again. We can’t be partners in life or work!”
She stood there, all the air gone from her body. His words killed a little piece of her. While she was willing to let a lot slide, the vicious cut of words tore at her.
They broke her.
Deep down, the part that made her want to love him the rest of her life was wilting. Everything that she felt for him began withering, dying deep inside her beneath the hurt.
In anger, he took a step toward her.
Julian moved to stand in front of his sister.
“It’s okay, Jules. Beckett physically hurting me can’t compare to what he just did to my heart,” she whispered, resting her hand on his shoulder.
Tori went to move toward her to hug her.
“I can’t, Tor, if you do, I’ll break.”
Julian wanted to hurt the man.
In that moment, he wanted to protect his sister and hurt himself for causing this.
“Okay, Beckett. I’ll never come near you again. I need some air,” she said, feeling like she was going to be sick. “I need to think. I’ll be down by the water. Come get me when it’s time to work.”
With that, she turned and walked away.
What sucked for her was that his lingering scent stayed with her, tormenting her every step of the way.
Beckett watched her leave, and his heart broke in his chest. When she stopped at the door, Claire turned to face him. “I was so very wrong about you, Beckett. Goodbye.”
As she headed out through the wrought iron bars, everything in her died.
She’d lost all that she wanted in life.
There would be no more moments of touching him.
Protecting him.
Loving him.
Beckett Rand had made his decision, and sadly, he’d based it on the woman who betrayed him in his past.
Not the one he made pay for it all.
It was so unfair.
Julian had just about enough. “You’re a total dick, and I don’t often call people that. What you just did was the lamest, most childish thing I’ve ever seen done.”
And it reminded him of something he’d once done to Tori in anger. He’d accused her of betrayal once too, and he’d nearly lost her in the process.
“This isn't my fault, but I don’t expect you to believe me. She’s your sister. Of course her allegiance is going to be with you. Of course she’s going to run to you the second my back is turned. She made a promise to me, Julian, and she broke it. I’ll never trust her again.”
Tori let her husband handle this.
He’d learned this lesson the hard way too. When it came to being an expert at nearly losing a good thing, he was a pro.
“You’re a dick because she never came to me. You’re so twisted up in knots that you’re not seeing that she’s not the one who betrayed you.”
“Then who did?”
“Claire didn't have to say a word. You told us everything by your actions, Beckett. It started the day you touched Bethany’s skull. Your eyes went glassy, and you checked out, much like Tori does. After the letter opener, you were shaken. You must have picked it up, and had a flash. Claire was comforting you. When we came in, she lied because it was you shaking, not her. There was no way she fell from that ladder. My sister could scale a wall in heels, let alone an eight foot ladder while barefoot.”
He swallowed.
Tori spoke up, “Bethany told me when we got here that you had a gift and could use it to help us.”
Oh God…
Shit! What had he done?
“Claire was the only one who never gave away your secret, Beckett. She’s not the one who betrayed you. You ratted yourself out by your own actions.”
His heart began pounding.
“Jesus,” he muttered, scrubbing his hands over his face. He was so ashamed of the burden he carried, that he’d just lashed out at someone who was innocent.
Julian continued, “I don’t know who betrayed you so badly that you’re this destroyed, man, but you have to let it go. At some point, Beckett, you’re going to have to believe that not every woman wants to hurt you. You may have to have faith that you’ve found the one who wants to love you for the rest of your life.”
At the ‘L’ word, he knew what he just threw away.
The previous night rushed through him, filling him not with peace but with dread over what he just destroyed. His fear had fed his anger, and he’d used Claire as his verbal punching bag. Not to mention he moved toward her like he wanted to hurt her.
This was a mess.
Oh shit!
“I have to find her. I need to fix this.”
He raced for the door, trying to calm himself down. What he just did was a huge mistake.
Now he needed to hope that Claire would forgive him.
He needed to get her back.
If she didn't, he wasn’t going to make it without her. She was his heart, and he was so sorry that he’d almost killed love.
~ Chapter Eleven ~
She needed to get away from him. Everything in her was breaking apart as her heart ached. What Claire wante
d to do was weep over what had just happened. She wanted to curl up into a ball, protecting herself from the hurtful words that Beckett had slung at her.
Did he really see her that way?
Could he possibly think so little of her?
Last night, she didn't just have sex with him. She’d offered him something that she never gave away--her heart.
Yet, it wasn’t enough.
Maybe she needed to face the truth. It was quite possible that Beckett was far too damaged to save. While she wanted nothing more in life than to be with him, she couldn’t take his random attacks when he became worried.
There had to be trust.
He needed to believe in her.
It didn't look like it would ever happen. Beckett Rand wouldn’t give her what she needed. Not because he didn't want to, but because he was broken inside.
Claire had tried to be the glue.
And it had gone horribly awry.
Now, she needed to escape, lick her wounds, and figure out what to do next.
It was time she made her own escape.
* * *
He saw her coming.
Just as he had been planning to creep into the house, one of them was coming to him.
This was perfect.
Now, he wouldn’t have to sweat the small details. Out here in the open, he could force their hand. Once he took this one’s life, they would stay.
Julian Littlemoon would have no choice.
Oh, he did his research on the man, and he had received accolades for his tracking and finding skills.
He could locate anything.
Hopefully, by taking this one’s life, Julian Littlemoon would stay in the game until the end when it was all wrapped up.
Then he, too, would die.
In fact, he was so desperate to get the gold that when the time came, they would all be sacrificed. Once it was in his greedy hands, he would light ‘The Killing House’ on fire and watch it burn.
Along with it would go their bodies and all the evidence.
He was giddy with the prospect.
Now, it was time to make his move.
He had a woman to kill, and little time to do it.
* * *
The further away she got from him, the worse she felt. While Claire believed the distance would help calm her, she’d been very wrong.
It only made it worse.
It was childish of her, but Claire wanted him to rush after her. She wanted him to admit he’d been wrong and that he did trust her.
Claire wanted him to say the words she knew from the second she saw him.
She wanted his love.
That first day, she fell for him, and now it was going to be a long journey back to living with the prospects of not having him in her life.
In fact, she had to leave.
Claire couldn’t stay there.
Beckett would need this job, since he left the sheriff’s department. Claire could go back to the Navy, and she would. Maybe if she was stationed at sea for a long time, she’d forget him.
It was all lies.
If she travelled to the other side of the universe, she’d still miss him.
A strangled sob slipped from her lips as the tears began rolling down her cheeks. Even as she willed them away, she began losing that battle too.
When she heard the crack of a branch behind her, Claire had hope that he’d come looking for her. As she turned, there was a blur and blinding pain.
It filled her head as she felt herself falling.
Backward.
Slowly.
It was as if time stopped moving.
And then there was her name being called from far away, but it faded. As she slipped into the darkness, there was a cocoon of wet that wrapped around her.
She sunk.
Deeper.
Deeper.
Until everything was gone.
Claire’s last thought was…
So, this was what it feels like to drown.
As he raced from the house, he called her name. Beckett knew he only had so much time to make her see he had been horribly wrong. If he didn't meet that window, she’d be gone.
Claire would leave him.
Could he blame her?
He put himself in her shoes, and his heart ached at what he’d done. He’d hurled such vicious accusations at her, that he didn't deserve a second chance.
All Beckett could hope was that she was a far better person than he was. Claire was light and love, and he needed to pray that she’d forgive him.
If not, he was gone.
Once more, he called to her. “Claire! Claire! Wait! Where are you? We need to talk!”
He scanned the area looking for her, but there wasn’t a trace to be found.
How?
He wasn’t that far behind her. She had maybe a minute head start at the most. Where the hell had she gone?
Heading toward the water, where she said she’d be, he saw nothing.
That was until he approached.
Then, his heart stopped.
“Oh, Jesus!”
Rushing toward the stagnant water, Beckett could see the form of someone floating face down in the mire. Wasting no time, he dove in, trying to get to her.
In his mind, he kept whispering one thing.
‘Please don’t be Claire.’
‘Please don’t be Claire.’
With each stroke toward the prone form, his fear became thicker and more viciously lodged in his chest. He saw her hair floating around her in some sick halo, and she wasn’t responding.
She wasn’t moving.
“Claire!” he shouted, rolling her over in the water so she could breathe. As he swam them back to shore, he began shouting for Julian.
Someone had to hear him.
Someone had to help him save her.
“Claire! Come on!” he pleaded to deaf ears, as he pulled her lifeless body from the water.
There was a vicious gash on her forehead and the second she was free from the water it began bleeding down her face.
“Julian!” he screamed again, laying her on her back. When he leaned down to see if she was breathing, she wasn’t.
Beckett forced himself to go into training mode. He had to save her. He couldn’t let it end like this. There was no way he could let her go.
Placing his mouth over hers, he tried to breath for her. With each push of air into her lungs, he said a prayer.
“Come on, baby. You can’t leave me like this. You can’t, Claire.”
Again, he placed his mouth over hers and tried to force life back into her body.
“Claire, if you go, I’m lost. Please don’t leave me.”
She didn't move.
With each breath, Beckett became more afraid.
Not only had he lost Claire, he’d caused this. He’d killed love, and her, with his anger.
Julian heard his name and the sheer panic in the man’s voice. With Tori at his side, he raced out of the house and toward the calls. As he approached, his heart began pounding in his chest. Both his sister and Beckett were wet and bloody.
It looked like he was doing…
CPR.
Oh God!
“What happened?” he asked, sliding to a stop.
Tori went into training mode and called for an ambulance. She wanted to panic, but they didn't have time.
Beckett kept trying to push air into her body. “I came down, and she was in the water.”
Julian dropped to his knees and took his sister’s hand in his. If anything happened to her, he was never going to forgive himself. After all, he’d started this entire chain of events.
“Claire! Damn it!” stated Beckett in a panic. “Wake up for me!”
Placing his mouth over Claire’s he tried once more.
Beckett desperately struggled to save the only woman who could save his heart.
* * *
The airport was hectic.
Justin didn't mind the wait because he was lear
ning plenty about the man beside him. When Captain Beau Christensen arrived, carrying a ruck sack, he reminded Justin of himself.
The man had the look of steely resolve on the outside, but inside was a different story. He’d gone off to war a few times, and that’s what was happening again.
Instead of guns, they were going to be using words and emotions.
The enemy wasn’t Tori, but what she’d feel after it all came out. Justin had to hope that when it was done, he’d still have his family intact.
He hated that he had to be the one to do this to her.
“You look nervous.”
The man nodded. “I am.”
“Why don’t you tell me about yourself?” Justin asked.
Beau glanced over. “You already ran me, so what’s to tell? You know I’m in the Army. You know I’m a Ranger. You know I’m the reason my sister is going to be heartbroken. What else could you possibly need?”
Justin went with the least volatile topic. “Your brother was an Army Ranger, too, and Tori would have been if the military allowed women to do it.”
He nodded. “Was he? The minute I found out about them, I wondered if we had anything in common.”
Justin continued, “Do you like it?”
“No. I didn't re-enlist.”
He was a little surprised. “Why didn't you?”
“There’s too much death. I’m tired of watching it unfold before me and having no control over it. I’m sick of seeing children die, and women strapping bombs to themselves in the name of a God who really doesn’t give a shit. I’m just sick of it.”
Justin patted him on the shoulder. “You aren’t alone.”
“Are you in the Army?” he asked the man beside him.
“Hell no. I’m a Marine.”
Beau laughed. “Yeah, it fits. I couldn’t tell by that normal civilian haircut you’re sporting.”
“Yeah, I’m growing it out.” What he didn't admit was that he didn’t want to look in the mirror anymore and see a soldier. That part of Justin was dead.
“Why did Victoria leave the military?”
This wasn’t Justin’s story to tell, so he kept it as simple as possible. “I like to think she had a higher calling. She left to go into the FBI, and then when she met my brother, she became his business partner.”
Unthinkable Games (LIttlemoon Investigations Book 3) Page 18