Colorblind (Moonlight)

by Dubrinsky, Violette

  “What information do you have about Penny?”

  She swallowed and looked at her feet. “Rumors, Massa. I don’ live in ’er cabin tho’ I be hearin’ ’bout how she slip out every night to go somewhere.”

  “Where?”

  He felt a jolt of anger that she was slipping out at night. Where was she going and was she meeting someone? A man perhaps?

  His affixation with Penny had started a few years ago, when he’d witnessed her rebellious behavior to Adam Thorn. He’d wanted to break her, something he enjoyed doing to the rebellious ones on his plantation. He’d hoped she remained intact, knowing it was far-fetched with all of those prime bulls around her, but now hearing some slave girl say that she was slipping out to meet a man…. That irritated him.

  “Dunno, Massa,” Aisha said, though Ryder got the feeling she was lying. “Rumor is she different from rest of us, got voodoo in ’er.”

  “Voodoo?” His curiosity was piqued once more. He’d never thought of Penny as having anything to do with nigger magic.

  Aisha looked around as if afraid someone was going to jump out and catch her before she fixed her gaze on his. Resisting the urge to tell her to lower her eyes, Ryder clenched his fists and waited.

  “I tell you all you need know, Massa…if you buy me.”

  He didn’t know whether to laugh or snap. A slave, bargaining with him? Three long steps brought him to her. One more had him pressed up against her. Shock, then terror, radiated from her body as he braced her between the stall door and his body.

  Her head dropped instantly. Placing a finger under her chin, he tilted it back up. Lips trembled in fear and her eyes welled with unshed tears. Weak. Pathetic.

  “Whites don’t bargain with niggers, girl, but I’ll make you one anyway.” He paused, reveling in the tremors that racked her body. “You tell me everything you know about Penny, and I won’t have you raped, beaten, and sent back to Arnaud barely alive.” He paused and jammed his hips into hers. Although he was hard, it wasn’t from her. Weakness didn’t affect him anymore. He’d enjoyed that as a young man. Now, he craved more. He craved a fight before submission. He craved Penny. “You understand, girl?”

  She nodded and he stepped back. He waited for her to calm herself, and when it seemed like he was waiting too long, demanded, “Well? What do you know of her?”

  With tears in her eyes, Aisha began to speak. Ryder listened carefully and by the time she’d finished her tale, he wanted Penny even more than he had before.

  ***

  Leon stood behind his mate, arms wrapped about her middle as they rested against the far wall of his study. Both were breathing harshly, although laughter occasionally interrupted.

  He was joined to her, unable to move until he shrank enough that he could pull away. Both were clothed, or mostly so. The bottom half of Penny’s dress was pushed over her back and the buttons at the front were undone to expose her breasts to his touch. Her drawers were pooled at her feet. His pants and undergarments were shoved to his knees.

  “You attacked me,” Penny chided, laughter in her breathless voice.

  He nipped at her neck, bringing a little whimper from her. “You teased me.”

  “How?”

  You know how.

  Laughter told him she did. “No, I don’t. How did I tease you?”

  “The feather.”

  She sighed. “I was only brushing lint from my collar.”

  Leon didn’t have to enter her mind to know she lied. From the moment he’d looked up from the stack of papers on his desk, she’d been watching him. As he looked on, she’d begun twirling the feather quill near her cheek, her nose, her lips, across her breasts.

  “You were teasing me, ma louve, weren’t you?”

  Another chuckle and she replied, “Only slightly.”

  His tongue swiped the bite marks against her shoulder. “You teased me so I attacked you. You deserved it.”

  As he slipped from her body, he kissed her neck and stepped away. Penny’s gown immediately fell back into place as she straightened and turned to face him. Leon couldn’t keep a straight face if he tried. Her head scarf was lopsided on her head, and her buttons had been undone so hastily, some were still looped.

  He laughed, which only made her chuckle. She tugged her head scarf off and began redoing her clothing. He did the same.

  Leon was heading back to his desk, to the papers he was supposed to be reading before Penny had played tease with the quill, when she stopped him with a question.

  “Can I become pregnant?”

  Spinning to face her, he felt his heart stop. “You can, but most were females have to go into heat. It’s when you’re most fertile.”

  He stared at her long and hard, trying to sense another presence. Penny wasn’t pregnant, was she?

  “Heat?” she queried, pulling up her undergarments and redoing the front buttons of her dress.

  He moved to her. “Yes. When you go into heat, your body will need mine… to ease you. Sexually.” Leon contained the urge to groan at the thought. “During that time, you’ll become so fertile that once I release inside you, you’re likely to conceive.”

  Her eyes dropped and her breathing changed. Leon smiled. He was glad she was affected by his words, as well. Was his mate anticipating her heat?

  He felt compelled to add, “Most females despise it. They say it’s a nuisance.”

  “Do you want children?” Penny asked slowly.

  Leon watched her. Those brown eyes held his. Leaning forward, he sniffed at her skin. Nothing untoward. She didn’t seem pregnant, nor did he smell the traces of heat. Was her heat coming soon? He really hoped not.

  “Yes, but not now,” he told her firmly. “If you conceived here, it would be dangerous—”

  “Of course,” she interjected. “I would never choose to give birth on a plantation, Leon. I know the risks too well.”

  He nodded, knowing she referred to her parents. Her question had brought him to a realization. He needed to be more careful. He would either have to stop touching her—an impossibility—or he would have to stop releasing into her body.

  But was that possible, either? His wolf laughed. Leon ignored it.

  There was only a small chance of conception outside of heat, but it happened. He would have to be more careful.

  ***

  “Excuse me?”

  “I said I'll give you seven hundred and fifty dollars for her,” Patrick Ryder repeated, a smile across his lips. “That’s least three hundred more than she’s worth. You can buy another slave with that money.”

  Leon harnessed his temper, just barely. “She’s not for sale, Mr. Ryder.”

  “Everyone’s for sale, Arnaud. Eight hundred and that’s as much as I’ll go.”

  Leaning back in his chair, Leon eyed Patrick Ryder and lifted a brow. He forced an easy smile and cocked his head slightly to the side, as if amused. “You can buy two slaves for that amount of money, Mr. Ryder. Now I’m curious as to why you’d spend so much for one slave girl.”

  “As I told you before, I want her.”

  It was becoming harder and harder to restrain his beast, especially with Patrick Ryder letting him know in no unspecific terms he desired his mate, but Leon once more managed. “She’s not for sale.”

  The older man said nothing for a long while before a sadistic grin touched his lips. “You’re keeping her for your bed?”

  When Leon didn’t answer, Ryder laughed. “When you get tired, let me know. I won’t offer you eight hundred again, but I’m sure we can come to a pleasant agreement.”

  Ryder stood and outstretched his hand. Leon did the same, keeping the slight smile on his lips.

  “Some of the boys are going to Madame Touilleur’s on Saturday.”

  “Madame Touilleur’s?”

  Ryder grinned. “A gentleman’s establishment in New Orleans that features only the prime of dark meat.”

  A whorehouse with colored women. He couldn’t say he was interested. />
  “It’s a good place to meet your peers under more…relaxed settings.” Turning suddenly, Ryder headed for the door. “Send word with one of your boys by Friday night if you’re going.”

  As soon as he left, Leon’s smile fell. He’d always known Ryder was interested in Penny, but from the last time they’d discussed her up until now, something must have happened. Why else would the man make him an offer of eight hundred dollars, easily the cost of two slaves, to purchase her? What had Ryder learned, and who had told him?

  Leon stood and tugged at the collar of his shirt, popping three of the buttons as he did so. One thing was certain. Ryder had learned something about Penny. Whatever it was had made him desperate to have her. Regardless, Leon wanted Penny away from the plantation and Patrick Ryder. And soon.

  ***

  Her heart felt close to jumping from her chest as she made her way up the staircase and along the darkened hallway. It was the third time Julia had done so, and she steeled herself to going through with it tonight. Most times she made it to the second floor before resolve fled and fear overcame her.

  Coming to the last door on her right, she inhaled deeply and gently, carefully, pushed it open. It was dark inside, so she could make out nothing. Still, she’d been in this room countless times over the past week to know where to tread. She took a step forward, and then another, continuing on as she reached the bed. Her eyes adjusted slightly to the dark and she made out a body lying prone under the thin, white sheets. Before she lost her nerve, she dropped her shawl and undid the ties of her nightgown, shedding them at the foot of bed before tugging back the sheets.

  She was about to slip under when his voice, gravelly, low, and dangerous, made her freeze. “What are you doing?”

  Her heart stopped before racing quickly once more. “I come to be wit’ you, Massa.”

  She heard him take a deep breath, and then the bed groaned. “Put your clothes on, Julia.”

  “Massa, I—” she began, terrified but determined. Before she could lose more nerve, she slipped under the sheets and reached for him.

  She was doing this for Jolie. She would willingly give herself to him if he allowed her to wait for her sister. Her hand found his bare chest and she inhaled quick, fighting back tears. “I here to give myself to you, Massa.”

  A large hand encased hers and it took everything not to snatch her hand back and run. She reminded herself that she’d done this before. Adam Thorn had left her sister alone, for the most part, because she’d willingly given herself to him. As she thought of him, her fear escalated. What if Armand was like Adam? Or his father? An involuntary shudder racked her body.

  Did he thrive on pain? He didn’t seem like the type, but she was resolved. Whatever it took, whatever he wanted, she would willingly do if it got her Jolie.

  “Why?” he demanded softly.

  For a moment, she was confused, and then she realized what he was asking. She considered lying, before she sighed. “I—for my sister, Massa. You let me wait for her and I give myself to you whenever you want.”

  The mattress dipped and she found herself under him. The sheet was wrapped around his lower half, preventing it from coming in contact with her, but her naked breasts were pressed against his chest. Julia resisted the urge to vomit.

  “And you want this?”

  Julia closed her eyes and nodded. “Yes, Massa.”

  “For your sister?”

  She answered in the affirmative once more, praying he didn’t try to kiss her. He could use her body, do whatever he wanted, but if he tried to kiss her, she prayed her control was enough to take it.

  His weight was suddenly gone and she opened her eyes, peering about in the dark for the shadow that would show her where he was. He stood by one of the windows, his naked silhouette outlined by the soft but slight moonlight spilling into his room.

  “Put your clothes on, Julia.”

  Shocked, she remained still. White men usually found her attractive. Irresistible, some had called her, yet he didn’t want her?

  “Now, Julia.” His voice wasn’t harsh, but it was commanding.

  Quickly, quietly, she slipped from the bed and found her gown, slipping it over her head. She felt around for the shawl and draped it across her shoulders. He was rejecting her, and she was embarrassed.

  “I sorry, Massa,” she managed, and then she practically ran for the door. Before she made it, he was at her back.

  “I don’t want you to give yourself to me out of fear for your sister.” His breath caressed her neck and although she shuddered in revulsion, something else was there. “When you give yourself to me, you’ll do so because you want me, because you can’t help yourself.”

  His hand slipped around her to open the door, brushing her waist in the process. Julia stepped forward, but stopped as he spoke once more. “As to your sister, I can’t promise much but I will try to have her brought here before we leave for the North.”

  Julia felt tears prick the backs of her eyes. The burn intensified and she sniffed before turning to face him. She could see nothing of his expression in the dark. Before she could think it through, she hugged him quickly, pulling away immediately.

  “Thank you, Massa,” she murmured, and then shocked at her behavior, fled from his room.

  ***

  “No!”

  Leon ignored her as he continued penning the letter to his brother. He was offering another slave for sale, for a very reasonable price.

  “I’m not leaving,” Penny continued, glaring down at him. “Simply because Ryder wants to purchase me? He’s wanted to do that for years, even before you came here.”

  “Patrick Ryder offered to pay eight hundred dollars for you, Penny.” He paused and lifted his head from the ink-blotted paper. She was staring incredulously at him, as expected. He continued writing. “I see you understand what that means.”

  “Eight hundred dollars?” She collapsed into one of his chairs.

  “Yes.” He stopped to stare at her and add, “He offered seven to start.”

  “Why?”

  “I don’t know,” he answered truthfully. “But he must know something.” Lowering the quill, he moved over to her. “I would rather have him know something with you far away, than with you here. Do you understand me?”

  “But we’re assuming—”

  “Yes, we’re assuming, Penny, but you’re leaving as soon as Armand or Étienne can get here. I won’t have you here if Ryder so much as suspects there is something different about you.”

  “What about you?”

  “I can handle myself.” Perhaps he should have said it in a different way because Penny’s eyes flared.

  “And I can’t?” she practically screeched.

  Before he could respond, she jumped up, put space between them, and bared her teeth. “I was looking after myself just fine before you got here, Leon Arnaud!”

  “I know—”

  “And I’m sure if you weren’t here, I would still be doing the same.”

  “Penny, you’re my mate—”

  “I know, Leon!” She shook her head. “Patrick Ryder has been after me for a long time. Adam used to threaten me with him as long as I can remember. Ryder’s probably just desperate—”

  It didn’t appease him any to learn Patrick Ryder was obsessed with his mate. Without knowing it, Penny was reaffirming his decision to get her away from the other man. “I won’t risk it. You’re leaving—”

  “I refuse to go,” she snapped, eyes flashing yellow at him.

  Leon was in front of her in a second, pressing her back against the door as he spoke, softly but forcefully, “You will leave here when my brother comes for you. Do you understand me?”

  “No!” she hissed. “You can’t make me leave yo—”

  “Yes, I can.” He hadn’t wanted to go there, but once spoken, the words hung between the two of them, setting them into the two categories he’d avoided from the moment he’d met her. Master and slave; slave and master.


  Leon saw hurt in her eyes before she lowered them, and steeled himself against it. She had to leave, and if this was the only way she would, then so be it.

  Penny didn’t speak for long moments and then she nodded once. “As you wish, Massa.”

  He tried to enter her mind but found himself blocked. Stepping away, he ran a hand across his face and moved back to his desk.

  “May I leave, Massa?” Penny asked from where she remained against the door.

  “Penny, this has to be done.”

  “Of course, Massa.”

  “Penny!”

  “May I leave, Massa?”

  He nodded and before he could say another word, she slipped from the study. Leon remained staring at the door, wondering when or if she was going to forgive him for this.

  She had to. He was her mate, and everything he did, he did to protect her. He just hoped she realized it soon.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Leon eyed the drunken, sprawled-out men around him dispassionately. It was Saturday and he’d accompanied Ryder to Madame Touilleur’s, a gentleman’s establishment on the outskirts of New Orleans. France had its share of whorehouses but most of the women there were protected by the madame and paid well for their labor. Madame Touilleur’s had no rules, and for Patrick Ryder and his peers, that was the allure.

  A hand clapped his shoulder, returning him to a scene in which he’d rather not take part.

  “That busty one is eyeing you, Arnaud.”

  This came from the balding, pudgy man who was one of his neighbors. Leon hadn’t bothered to remember his name. Fat, stubby fingers pointed and Leon looked in the direction. A curvaceous woman, paler in complexion than even Julia but with full, prominent features, winked at him. She wore a blond wig and so much powder she could probably bake a cake.

  His companions must have noticed the man pointing because they began calling out suggestions that would never be heard in polite company.

  “Paler these niggers is, bolder they are,” the pudgy man confided. “Got to teach them their place.”

  “Maybe she’s looking at you,” Leon retorted evenly, turning his attention to where Patrick Ryder sat opposite him. The man had already consumed a hefty amount of alcohol, and his gaze kept trailing the thin, dark-skinned girl who brought them their drinks. Leon doubted she was one of Madame Touilleur’s whores, but Patrick Ryder didn’t seem to care. The sad thing was despite that, if Ryder asked the Madame for her, he was certain to get her.