What she meant was exactly what she’d said. She couldn’t have children. She’d started her bleeding from the age of fifteen, and from then, they’d been using her. Thorn had expected her to breed sooner. In fact, he’d purposely taken her with the sole intentions of breeding her later on.
“You don’t have to tell me—”
“I never conceived,” she interrupted, fearful that once she stopped speaking she would not have the courage to do it once more. “They did what they did to me but I never—because I can’t.”
Penny shuffled closer to her on the bench, and wrapped an arm about her.
“You don’t know that,” she said softly, compassion evident in her voice. “They weren’t right for you. Armand is.”
“Nothing happens with him, either.” The confession was hard but these thoughts had been on her mind as the months passed with her in Armand’s bed and nothing came of it. She was not actively trying to have a baby. She just feared she would never be able to, feared disappointing the only man she’d ever loved, the only man who truly loved her.
“Julia,” Penny began softly. “Maybe your body is not ready yet. Do you know Dara?” She nodded. Dara, like her, was a former slave who lived a few cottages away from them. She’d shown Julia how to make delicious pastries. “She told me it took her years to get pregnant. Maybe you’re like her.”
A tiny bit of hope surged in her chest. “And what if I’m not? What if I just can’t?”
“Have you spoken to Armand about this?”
“No!” She jerked away from Penny and glared. “And you can’t tell him, either.”
Penny nodded immediately, and Julia felt contrite. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to yell. It’s just …sometimes I think he knows, like he can read my mind or something.” She laughed at the silliness of her statement.
There had been days and nights when she’d been next to Armand, thinking in detail of her past, only to find him looking at her as if he was ready to kill something. When she’d ask him what was wrong, he’d shake his head, kiss her, and leave on one of his frequent walks. At first, she’d thought she’d done something, but he was thorough in reassuring her it was nothing on her part.
“Read your mind?” Penny queried, eyes widening as she blinked furiously.
“I know. It’s silly. Forget it.” Sighing, Julia continued, “Please don’t tell anyone what I told you. I want to tell Armand myself, when I’m sure.”
“I think you should talk to him about it now. He’s very understanding.”
“I know, but he might not be so understanding about this.” She shook her head, no longer wishing to discuss it.
“Julia, listen to me.” Penny’s voice was soft but commanding. She turned to face her friend. As she did, Penny took Julia’s hands in her own. “Armand will never leave you. He needs you too much. Even if you can’t have children, he would still love you.”
She felt tears burn her eyes. “I hope you’re right.”
“I’m right. I promise.”
Julia hugged her as best she could with the protruding belly between them. As she pulled away, wiping at her eyes, she joked, “I think I inherited all of your pregnancy emotions.”
Penny wiped at her eyes as well. “It’s possible since you never leave my side.”
Chuckling, Julia stood and looked to the sky. Dark clouds had settled overhead. She looked down to Penny, who was looking at the sky as well. “I think we should go inside.”
“No. I’d like to sit here and allow the rain to soak through my hair and clothes just to cool down.”
Shaking her head with a laugh, Julia replied, “I can’t let you do that. Leon won’t like me anymore.”
Penny looked like she was contemplating it before she replied, “You’re right. He’s lucky I love him.”
Satisfied that Penny would not be sitting through a rainstorm, Julia walked over to the satchel containing snacks she’d left on a tree stump. She was turning back to Penny when thunder cracked so loudly, frightening her so badly, she dropped the food.
***
Lowering her arm, Penny jerked herself down as far as she could go to better slip her swollen feet into the sandals. They were the only things she could wear since her feet, along with every other part of her body, had tripled in size. She dismissed the swish that whizzed past her as a sudden wind and the crack as thunder until Julia began to scream.
“What?” she immediately popped up, looking into the terrified face of her friend, but Julia wasn’t looking at her. She was looking over Penny’s head and rushing to her. She grabbed her hands and pulled her up. For a smaller woman, Julia hauled Penny up quickly.
“Julia, what—?”
Suddenly, Julia spun her, pushing Penny forward and in the direction of the cottage. “Get inside!”
Penny heard it then, the blast that signaled the recoil of a gun. What she’d dismissed as thunder had been a gunshot. She yanked Julia to the ground with her, dragging the woman behind a large oak tree even as a sharp pain lanced her belly.
With Penny’s keen eyesight, she located him, or rather his gun. He was perched on raised ground, giving him the advantage. Their back yard was a bit of a slope, with the most elevated point being farther back.
Leon? Where are you? Someone’s shooting at us.
Penny had barely transmitted the message before the gun fell. There was a blur of movement, a scuffle, and the sounds of tearing flesh. Leon had found him. Before relaxing, Penny scented the air, looking for any strange scents. Her pregnancy had weakened her abilities, making her less attuned to almost everything. She found nothing.
Turning back to Julia, she pasted on a smile, hoping to reassure the terrified woman. What she saw made her freeze. Julia’s eyes were wide, but not from fright. They were glazed over, her lips partially open in shock and pain.
She smelled it then. Blood. It did not belong to the man Leon had attacked.
As Penny looked down, a chill passed through her body. Julia had been wearing a patterned, pale blue dress of her own creation. The front was now soaked a bright red. Her delicate fingers, usually clean, with neatly filed nails, were streaked red in their unsuccessful attempt to stanch the flow beneath them.
Penny jumped into action immediately. She ripped chunks out of her own dress, balled them up, and placed the cloth against Julia’s wound. She then pressed her hand there firmly, hoping to stop the flow enough to save her friend.
Julia moaned in pain and Penny whispered reassuring words to her.
“Armand! Étienne!” she called next, hoping at least one was near. Secretly, she prayed it was Étienne. Armand would have a harder time—
There was rustling next to her. Looking up, Penny saw a naked and bloodied Leon.
He was aiming for you. He’s dead.
He sniffed and Penny saw his jaw clench in anger. Moments later, he shook his head.
She’s dying.
Instinct told her the same but Penny refused to believe it. Not Julia and not now. “We have to get her inside, Leon—”
“Julia!” Penny heard him before he rushed into their back yard. Armand looked haggard, nervous, and terrified, all rolled into one. Upon seeing the wounded woman, a look of pain flashed across his face.
Kneeling beside her, he called her name. Julia turned to him, her neck movement jerky and slow. “Had—to—save—Penny.”
He nodded once, and Penny moved away, giving him better access to his mate. Leon had once told her Armand couldn’t claim Julia the way he’d claimed her, but for all purposes Armand considered Julia his.
“I’m going to move you now. All right?” His voice was hoarse and strained, and Penny turned her head away briefly, not wanting her friend to see the tears in her eyes.
As Armand attempted to lift her, she cried out, pushing at his arms. “Pain. Too much pain. Stop. Please.”
“I’m sorry—so sorry. I won’t move you,” Armand amended softly, cupping her cheek.
He pulled her forward slightly, gr
oaning as he noticed the entry wound at her back.
Her lids fell suddenly, and Armand shook her. She blinked open her eyes frantically. “Penny. Must. Save. Penny. Pregnant.”
“She’s fine. See?” Armand said, moving slightly.
Leon helped Penny get to her knees beside her friend. With a lump in her throat, she managed to speak. “Thank you. You saved us both.”
“Good.” Julia nodded and turned back to Armand. Lifting a hand, she stroked his face. Leon lifted Penny away at that moment, and she buried her face against his chest. She could no longer stop her tears. Julia had selflessly taken a bullet for her.
“Love you,” she heard Julia say in a fading voice. “Care my Jolie when I—I not here.” Armand agreed to everything. “She has…no one.”
Her eyes closed and Armand said softly, “Julia, don’t. Please. Not yet.”
“Tired,” she replied, lids lifting slowly. “No pain. Just tired.” Her hand fell limply to her side and Armand caught it, brought it to his lips.
“You showed me…happiness,” she said in a voice so low it couldn’t even be called a whisper. “I—” She coughed, droplets of blood splattering her chin, and closed her eyes. “Thank…you.”
Her head fell back against the tree, and Armand let out a cry so anguished Penny broke down into further tears. Julia’s heart had stopped. It no longer beat its slow, fading beat. Death had set in, and Julia’s natural scent was fading. Her friend. Her selfless friend.
She was being moved. Leon had lifted her and was leading her somewhere…into their cottage. He mentioned something about giving Armand time alone with his mate. Time to grieve.
Penny heard it all but none of it registered. Leon carried her to their room, where he removed her dress. As she stood there in shock, he hastily wiped the blood from her skin. A soft bed was suddenly at her back and covers pulled around her.
Later that evening, her contractions began.
***
Julian Leon Arnaud was born the next day. He weighed a healthy eight pounds and was fond of smiling his toothless smile. Penny couldn’t look at him without feeling the need to nurture and protect. He’d only been alive for a day but she loved him more than she’d loved anything, anyone.
Her heart still ached for her friend, and she’d named her son after the woman who’d given her to life to make sure he had his. Julian. Her precious gift from a dear friend.
The baby began to coo, working his fat little legs in excitement. Penny found a slight smile. Those were the feet that had all but kicked their way from her belly.
Moments later, the door opened and Leon entered the room.
“How do you feel?” he asked softly. Her mate had been the strong one through the trying pregnancy. Penny had been so distraught at Julia’s death she could barely concentrate on anything else. Even when the contractions racked her body, she’d been unable to push. Leon had cupped her face and told her he loved her, but if she didn’t push the baby out, he would have no choice but to cut her.
“Don’t make me do this, ma louve,” he’d half-pleaded, terror stark on his face as thoughts of losing her and his unborn swarmed his mind.
Penny had found strength then. She was grieving but she wouldn’t hurt Leon that way. If he had to remove their son from her, it would complicate her pregnancy. So she’d pushed, and pushed, and Julian had been so eager to come out that just after a relatively short time, he’d made an appearance.
“Better,” she responded, taking in the bags under his eyes. Leon hadn’t slept since the day before. Between Julia’s death, her contractions, and the new baby, he’d been the strong one. As she’d rested after delivery, he’d taken care of Julian. He’d woken her only to feed the baby before allowing her to rest once more.
“Do you want me to take him?” Leon asked softly, heading for Julian, who’d obviously already formed an attachment to his father. She’d been told before that werewolf babies developed faster than human babies but even so, seeing it was a bit shocking.
“No.” The answer was quick. She didn’t want him away from her anymore. Leon would have to bring the bassinet into their room.
As her mate approached, Penny watched him warily. Julian stretched his arms out to his father when Leon stood above him, and Penny resisted the urge to bare her teeth as Leon picked him up. With the baby tucked securely in the crook of his arm, Leon smiled and sat.
Julian looked at her from over his father’s shoulders, cooing and smiling all the while. Reaching out a hand, she gently stroked the baby’s soft cheek, pulling her finger away when he tried to put it into his mouth.
“He’s hungry, Leon.” She’d awoken to find Julian on the bed next to her. He’d pushed up his head to stare at her. A fluffy feather pillow had been on his other side in case he rolled.
Without argument, Leon handed him to her. She undid her gown and placed the baby to her breast, wincing a bit when he latched on to her nipple.
“Does it hurt you?” Leon watched them both, missing nothing.
Deciding on honesty, Penny nodded but added, “It hurts human women as well. It’s part of motherhood.”
He didn’t respond for a long time as they both focused on the suckling child. Julian fell asleep at her breast, and Penny lifted him to her shoulder and gently tapped at his small back until he released a little burp. Turning to Leon, she asked softly, “Can you bring his bassinet into the room?”
“Penny,” Leon began in the firm voice he used whenever he was about to disagree.
Penny didn’t allow him to finish. “No, Leon, I don’t want to hear it. My friend was killed by a bullet intended for me. Julian is a newborn, and he needs me. I want his bassinet in this room.” She paused and glared at him. Leon stared at her. Almost instantly, she grew indignant. “I’m going to get it if you don’t—”
He pushed from the bed and headed for the door. Moments later, he returned with the small wooden contraption he’d built. Soft wool had been placed into the two-foot-long dip, and blankets piled on. Leon placed it next to her and held his hands out for Julian.
With a grateful smile, Penny handed the baby over, watching as Leon gently placed his son down and retrieved a miniature sheet to cover him. He rejoined her in bed after, moving close. Penny slid down so he could wrap his arms around her.
“How’s Armand?”
“Broken.”
It was expected. How else would he be?
“Jolie?” she continued softly.
“Devastated.”
Penny nodded. “I love you, Leon. If anything happened to you, I wouldn’t know what to do, or how to go on. I’d be broken and devastated, too.”
He kissed her forehead. “Nothing will happen to me.”
“You don’t know that—”
“I know that I will kill anyone who threatens you or Julian, and anyone who tries to take me from you two,” he interrupted, simultaneously tightening his hold. His lips brushed hers. “We can’t stay here. The man who killed Julia was a slave-catcher. If they’re willing to send one, they will send others. I can’t risk it. We can’t risk it.”
Penny nodded. She agreed.
“Where will we go?”
“France,” Leon replied softly. “I can keep you and Julian safe there. I have estates in the countryside that are unregistered and surrounded by werewolves. Extended family. No one will be able to find us unless we wish it, and no one will survive entry unless invited.”
“We have to wait until after Julia’s burial.”
“Of course.” He paused. “Armand wants to cremate her.”
“Why?”
“He doesn’t want her caged—”
“And a coffin would do that,” Penny finished.
Although she’d never spoken to Julia about death, Penny knew that Julia would probably agree with Armand. After spending a lifetime as a slave, Julia would not appreciate being locked away in a box and placed deep in the ground.
“When?”
“Tomorrow.” Leon told
her of a clearing almost half an hour’s ride away. “He wants to scatter her ashes, across the ocean, so she’ll always be traveling and seeing new places.”
Penny didn’t know when she’d begun crying but tears were streaming down her face and onto her night gown.
“It’s my fault,” she finally whispered, so broken-hearted over the situation she began to sob.
“No. The fault lies with the slave-catcher, and whoever sent him. Julia wanted to save you and Julian, and for that, I will be eternally grateful to her.”
“Does Armand blame me?”
Leon hesitated, which told Penny his brother did. “Armand blames the universe and everyone in it.”
Penny nodded, and tried to think of other things. “Will they accept me in France? Accept us?”
“Yes. You are one of us, regardless of color. Even if you were not, they would accept you because you are my mate. That is the least of your worries, Penny.”
She didn’t speak for long moments. By that time, Leon’s breathing had evened and she thought him asleep.
In the barest whisper of a voice, she murmured, “Thank you for loving me.”
“Always, ma louve.” The response came quickly. “Do not worry about anything. We’ll be fine.”
Penny didn’t reply, but she nodded against him. When Leon said it, she believed it.
Weariness settled in and she sighed against him. Maybe in some years, she wouldn’t have to worry over things like where they lived. Maybe the times would soon change, and she would be able to go anywhere with her husband and child without the fear of being an outcast, or worse, being killed.
Until that time came, she would trust that her mate would not put their family in any harmful situation.
Epilogue
Present Day, New York
Penny Arnaud glared down at the younger woman before her. Although Leanne was twenty-eight years old, in the way of their kind, she still looked and acted very much like a teenaged human on the verge of adulthood. It was for that reason Penny was standing over her, arms crossed underneath her breasts, as she out-stared her youngest.
“You’re not allowed to use that word in my house, young lady. Do you understand me?”
Colorblind (Moonlight) Page 25