“Are your souls still bound?” Blaze asked.
Reluctant to give away family secrets, she just shrugged rather than have to lie.
Charlotte leaned into her. “Lorraine, I admit I’m new to the Carpathian world and I still think in terms of being human, but even I know this is highly unusual. I think, if Tariq knew, he would have told me.” She lowered her voice and looked around her. “Something like that is explosive.”
She sank back in her chair, and it was clear she was talking with her lifemate. Lorraine had just done so, but having Charlotte consult privately with Tariq made her a little nervous. Having lifemates speaking telepathically as an everyday, common occurrence was just plain cool. Still, Tariq was the leader, and the idea that she’d explained anything incorrectly to Tariq’s wife, and perhaps had made more problems for the ancients, upset her.
“He knows,” Lorraine said, tilting her chin at Charlotte. “Andor told him immediately.”
Charlotte nodded. “He does know. He said he was thinking about the consequences before telling me.”
“Consequences?” Emeline asked. “Why would there be consequences?”
Blaze touched Emeline’s wrist very gently, drawing Lorraine’s attention to the white scars there, as if someone had torn Emeline’s skin as deliberately rough as possible. “An ancient without a lifemate is potentially a very dangerous man to all of us. They are our greatest weapons, but should they turn, they would make the worst of all enemies. Tied to the three, Lorraine would be unable to hide from them.”
Emeline turned her gaze to Lorraine, not attempting to hide her horror. She’d been tied to a vampire and knew how truly brutal and cruel they could be.
“I think, having the three of them bound to us”—she made certain to include Andor—“gives them the opportunity to feel my emotions when they haven’t felt for so many centuries. I’m hoping it gives them more time.”
Charlotte started to say something with a little shake of her head but then stopped herself. Lorraine lifted an eyebrow. “What? Just tell me. Sooner or later someone will, and I may as well have the information now.”
“It’s just that feeling emotion and then losing that ability over and over, as they would when they were away from you, is actually harder on them.”
Lorraine frowned. “That doesn’t make any sense. They are tied to us until they find lifemates. All three. At any time, they can access emotion. That should make it easier, not harder. Unless they are a great distance away, hunting, which I am certain other lifemates do, they can feel if they tap into my emotions.”
“She’s right,” Blaze said. “I checked with Maksim.”
“That should be right, but these are ancients we’re talking about. Like truly ancient. I know anything over five hundred years is considered ancient, but this is a huge difference in age. They no longer count age, but all this time they’ve been building in power,” Charlotte said.
Lorraine couldn’t help but see why she was fit to be lifemate to the leader. Charlotte was looking at problems from every angle and trying to figure out what could happen to better prepare them all for it.
“So, what do you think is happening, if not the ability to tap into my emotions?”
“I think those ancients are struggling every minute of every rising, and they are going to become more careless in the way they fight. They don’t believe in meeting the dawn, so where can they go? What can they do? Emotions without an anchor will mess them up more. Their lifemates anchor them where you can’t.”
Blaze threw her hands into the air. “Charlotte, I still don’t understand. What are you saying?”
It was Emeline who answered. “Blaze, think about what would happen to someone if they hadn’t seen in color but now can. It’s disorienting. It can actually make them feel sick. The vivid brightness is too much. It’s overwhelming. And then add emotions into the mix. They have to sort through them very quickly and choose to use or discard. A lifemate automatically aids with those things. You do it without even being aware that you’re doing it. The three ancients cannot possibly assimilate those things without help. The draw to tap into Lorraine’s emotions has to be incredible, yet it won’t help them. In fact, just the opposite.”
The air exploded out of Lorraine’s lungs. Why didn’t you tell me? But she knew why. Andor had explained things in a way that had made her believe the ancients benefited from her pressing them to be tied to her. He wanted her to believe she’d done something good for those she cared about. She already thought of them as family. The last thing she wanted to do was harm them in any way. She wanted to protect them and help them find the lifemates she believed they deserved.
Breathe, Lorraine. You already knew there was a risk …
To me. To us. In that they could find us, but the risk to them was only if they turned vampire and you could track them. I never thought by binding them to me, I would make what they suffered more. I thought it would be less.
We do not know what is happening to them because they choose not to tell us.
I could find out …
No. Absolutely not. You are not to look into their minds. That would be considered a breach of etiquette.
She didn’t want to look into their minds. She’d discovered too many horrific things. She’d her own nightmare to deal with, she didn’t need any more, or to take on someone else’s.
“Lorraine.” Emeline’s voice was sweet.
Lorraine could imagine her holding a baby in her arms and rocking her gently.
“These men have been contending with evil and the fight to stay honorable for a long time. No matter what happens, you remember it was their choice. It is always a choice whether or not they choose to give up their soul,” Emeline said.
“How is that possible?” Lorraine fought to understand. The world of the Carpathians was far older than she’d imagined and she had difficulty grasping the complexities.
“There is one clarifying moment, even in a thrall, Dragomir told me, where they have a chance to go back. To take that decision back. Those who are vampire stayed that course. They decided for themselves that they preferred to become the undead rather than go out of this world with honor.”
Lorraine bit down on her lower lip. “I’ll send up prayers that Ferro, Sandu and Gary don’t ever have to make that decision.” She meant it, too. After the loss of her family, she wasn’t certain what she believed anymore, but she could pray and do it in several languages. Surely, she would be heard and not judged for being angry.
“Honey,” Charlotte said, “they make that decision every rising.”
That sank in. Mostly, she thought in terms of Andor. He’d been an ancient making his way in the world, searching for her, his lifemate. He’d endured rising after rising and never given in to the persistent voice that tried to lure him to become the undead. Had he been tempted?
Were you tempted, Andor? Was it as bad as it sounds?
Worse. Much worse, he promptly responded. He was matter-of-fact. There was no bid for sympathy; he might have been discussing the weather. And yes, I was tempted, but only after the whispers ceased, leaving me with nothing at all.
Lorraine couldn’t imagine his life, but she felt it, she’d sensed emotions coming from him when he hadn’t been able to acknowledge them. She’d felt pain when he couldn’t. To some it might seem a perfect existence, but she knew better.
“Csecsemõ, we need you here at the warriors’ council. You have about fifteen minutes and then you will receive a summons. It is up to you whether you wish to decline or not.
That didn’t sound good. Now the next fifteen minutes were going to crawl by. Thanks for the heads-up. She failed to keep the sarcasm to herself.
I thought you would want time for those strange things you women do.
What things? she challenged.
Fuss, because you do not think you look good enough, when in fact you look so good your lifemate struggles with control.
My lifemate never struggles with co
ntrol, although sooner or later, I will make certain that it happens. Deliberately she thought about licking up his shaft. She felt the way his body reacted, a hard jerk of his cock. Instant alertness of his nerve endings. Her little gesture was an immediate success.
Just remember retaliation is in order.
She loved the threat in his voice. Loved it.
“Lorraine, are you paying attention or drifting off?” Blaze demanded and pointed to Amelia, who had just walked up the stairs.
Charlotte laughed and held out her hand to the newcomer. Amelia went to stand beside her adoptive mother, allowing Charlotte to wrap her arm around her waist.
“She’s got that goofy look on her face,” Amelia said. “The one you all get when you talk telepathically to your lifemates. The only thing a person can do for self-preservation, if they don’t want to see you all mushy, is close their eyes and count to one hundred. Or plug their ears and sing lalala.” She rolled her eyes.
“I don’t look goofy,” Lorraine protested.
“Totally goofy. And gooey,” Amelia added. “Bella would say gooey.” The smile faded and she looked down at her feet.
Lorraine saw Charlotte nudge the teen gently. Amelia lifted her chin and moved a scant inch closer to Charlotte. That told Lorraine a couple of things. The first and maybe most important, Amelia accepted her adoptive mother and trusted her. The second was her gaze continually shifted away from Lorraine’s. Either she was very shy, which seemed doubtful, given the way she was when they’d first met, or something had happened to her and she thought Lorraine knew.
“I want to learn to fight vampires.” Amelia was abrupt to the point of rudeness, her voice belligerent and almost angry. “Blaze is going to work with me when she has time. I want you to help me as well.”
Lorraine steepled her fingers. “I actually think that’s a good idea, Amelia. I wish everyone thought the way you do. We can’t always count on having someone to protect us. I think, rather than seek them out ourselves, we should understand that eventually, given that we live in such close proximity to the hunters, we are bound to see vampires. They are difficult to kill. Really difficult. Have you exchanged blood with anyone?”
Amelia’s entire demeanor changed. She heaved a sigh of relief that Lorraine was taking her seriously. “Yes, Tariq.”
Great. The fearless leader. The teen’s father. Lorraine didn’t know that he would want a child to be running loose in his head. She rubbed the bridge of her nose. “I had hoped to bring this subject up with Charlotte,” she admitted, changing her tactic. “Maybe gather the women together, and before you protest, I count you among the women.”
“I want private lessons as well,” Amelia said staunchly. “I want to learn fast. I’ll work really hard.”
A red flag went up at the hard belligerence in her voice. “Amelia,” Lorraine cautioned. “You can’t fight these things alone.”
“You did. You fought off three men with a saucepot, and then you protected Andor when he was mortally wounded.”
Gossip traveled fast in the Carpathian world. Lorraine knew it was so easy to communicate telepathically, and all Carpathians seemed to use that method. “I didn’t fight off vampires by myself, and I certainly am far too intelligent to go seek one out. That would be suicide.”
Amelia looked away from her, staring out toward the lake. Since the lake was in the distance, and there was nothing much happening on it, Lorraine took that to mean she didn’t want to discuss her reasons.
“I have a responsibility to you, Amelia. To any of the women I teach. Your body is your temple. You take care of it. You put nothing into it that isn’t healthy, and you don’t contemplate giving up your life, certainly not when you’re one of the few people who actually know about the undead. You have an obligation, just as I do, to these three women and all the Carpathians.”
Amelia frowned at her. “I’m not a grown-up. What I do doesn’t affect anyone but me.”
“You know that isn’t the truth, Amelia. If something happened to you, what of your siblings? Bella is already terrified and upset over the loss of one sister. That one sister isn’t dead. She can still see her and play with her even if that time has limitation.”
Amelia shook her head, as if denying the truth, but she seemed calmer and less agitated, as if she were listening in spite of not wanting to.
“I always have tried to live with truth, Amelia. It’s so much easier than lying to others or especially lying to oneself. If you’re going to study under me, you’ll have to trust me enough to give me truth. Do you understand?”
Amelia slowly nodded. “I can do that.”
“Saying it and doing it are two different things. I want you to think long and hard about it, and if you still feel the same way tomorrow, we’ll have our first lesson.”
Amelia flashed a smile that didn’t quite clear the dullness from her eyes. “You don’t want to start right now?”
“I would, but apparently the council has other plans for me. I have been summoned.” Lorraine stood up and pushed her chair in. “Thank you for the wonderful company. I loved every minute of it. It’s been a long while since I talked to anyone and I’m so glad it was all of you. Thank you for making me feel welcome.”
Charlotte nodded. “It was very nice to meet you. I’ll look forward to the ceremony of your conversion later tonight.”
Lorraine wasn’t exactly looking forward to it, although she was committed. She knew that was part of the problem. “I’m a little nervous about that. I should have just told him to do it right then. But I wanted to have time to go over the details in my mind, and I’m glad I did.” That had given her time for processing to take place, so she knew she was making the right decision. She wanted Andor to always feel as if she hadn’t been coerced. “But at the same time, I’m super nervous. Still, I’ll be looking forward to seeing you tonight.”
She left the women on the porch, waving as she went, inexplicably happy that she’d found some friends. She’d missed being able to laugh with other women. She had it in her mind that once they had lifemates, their lives were so wrapped up in their men, they forgot all about women bonding together. Looking at the four of them laughing together, she knew that wasn’t the truth.
17
Looking down at the very large carved oak table, Lorraine had a sudden urge to laugh. The men were seated around it, although, like gentlemen, they’d come to their feet when she entered the room. There had been no convincing them that she didn’t need the recognition. Carpathians were old-school gentlemen. They might rip a man’s heart out, but that was okay. Forgetting to stand for a lady was an infraction none of them wanted.
Across the table was a map—and it was huge and hand drawn. There was the location of Tariq’s nightclub and his home, clearly marked. Beneath the streets of the city was a labyrinth of marked twists and turns. The map had been drawn by each Carpathian contributing what they knew of the vampires’ whereabouts and lairs. They seemed to be everywhere.
Lorraine was a little shocked to see her camping spot so clearly marked. Every encounter the hunters had with the vampires was put on the map. There appeared to be a wide circle with the labyrinth in the center, as if that maze was the very heart of the undead’s domain.
“What is this?” she asked. “Aside from the obvious.”
Tariq answered. “We were discussing how Sergey is staying in this city. In the past, when hunters came, the vampire fled and took up residence somewhere else. We have evidence to suggest that is no longer true. We send Mikhail, our prince, as much information as we can gather on everything new and different about the undead. If they are doing this here, they have to be doing the same thing there.”
Andor reached for her hand and tugged until she was close to him, close enough that she felt his body heat. “They are definitely coming together in South America as well. The De La Cruz brothers sent word to us and continue to do so. We are all keeping track now with maps. They have all been sent to one of our own, Josef, w
ho compiles them into a worldwide map for each of us.”
“How can he do that?” Lorraine asked. “What kind of software puts together vampire attacks?”
“One of his own making. Josef creates tools for whatever we need,” Gary said. He was seated at Tariq’s right hand.
Lorraine looked closer at the two men. She could see a small shimmer arcing from one to the other, as if that seat of power couldn’t quite make up its mind.
They are learning to work with each other, Andor explained, seeing her look of inquiry. Sit down.
Where? As far as she could see, every chair was occupied. The only one not present that she knew of was Ferro. There aren’t any chairs open. Where’s Ferro? Was he hurt a lot worse than you let on?
You could sit on my lap, Andor offered. There was a mischievous note to his voice.
Um. No. Not with all these men around and your wandering hands. You might accidentally forget what we were doing. I already know about your forays into voyeurism.
Andor laughed, and for a brief moment, gazes from around the table flicked from him to her. She felt a blush creeping up her neck to her face. He waved a hand and produced a chair right next to him. Very close. She gave him her sternest look and sank into it. He dropped his hand on her thigh and she immediately realized her thigh was tight against his.
She should have cared, but the truth was, she was glad to be with him again. She’d kept her mind from tuning to him too often, and only when she felt the subject was important, but the toll on her for having to fight her own inclinations had been more than she’d bargained for.
She forced her attention back to the others. Tariq and Gary were new to working with each other. That brought up questions. Why does Gary have to work with Tariq?
The prince asked. When he asks you to do something, you could decline, but no one ever has. Gary is Tariq’s adviser, protector and just about everything else in between.
“Is there word on Aidan?” Tomas asked. He was one of the triplets and had spent some time traveling, she knew.
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