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The Collected Poems of Lucille Clifton 1965-2010

Page 12

by Lucille Clifton


  it has been enough

  4.

  a voice foretold

  that i shall find

  sanctuary

  somewhere in alabama

  a baby is born to a girl

  in a tarpaper room

  his blind hand shivers

  groping toward her breasts

  as toward a lamp

  she holds him to her

  and begins to sing

  live where you can

  be happy as you can

  slowly

  the soft eyes open

  5.

  all eyes fail

  before time’s eye

  it has been enough

  slowly the soft eyes open

  what ground is this

  what god

  i could say much to you

  be happy as you can

  defending my tongue

  what i be talking about

  can be said in this language

  only this tongue

  be the one that understands

  what i be talking about

  you are you talking about

  the landscape that would break me

  if it could the trees

  my grandfolk swung from the dirt

  they planted in and ate

  no what i be talking about

  the dirt the tree the land

  scape can only be said

  in this language the words

  be hard be bumping out too much

  to be contained in one thin tongue

  like this language this landscape this life

  catalpa flower

  from the wisdom of sister brown

  1.

  on sisterhood

  some of our sisters

  who put down the bucket

  lookin for us

  to pick it up

  2.

  on lena (born 6/30/17)

  people talk about beautiful

  and look at lizabeth taylor

  lena just stand there smilin

  a tricky smile

  3.

  on the difference between

  eddie murphy and richard pryor

  eddie, he a young blood

  he see somethin funny

  in everythin ol rich

  been around a long time

  he know aint nothin

  really funny

  the birth of language

  and adam rose

  fearful in the garden

  without words

  for the grass

  his fingers plucked

  without a tongue

  to name the taste

  shimmering in his mouth

  did they draw blood

  the blades did it become

  his early lunge

  toward language

  did his astonishment

  surround him

  did he shudder

  did he whisper

  eve

  we are running

  running and

  time is clocking us

  from the edge like an only

  daughter.

  our mothers stream before us,

  cradling their breasts in their

  hands.

  oh pray that what we want

  is worth this running,

  pray that what we’re running

  toward

  is what we want.

  what the grass knew

  after some days, toward evening,

  He stood under a brackish sky

  trembling and blaming creation.

  but the grass knew that what is built

  is finally built for others,

  that firmament is not enough, that

  tiger was coming and partridge and

  whale and even their raucous voices

  would not satisfy. He, walking

  the cool of the garden, lonely

  as light, realized that He must feed

  His own hunger or die. adam,

  He nodded, adam,

  while the understanding grass

  prepared itself for eve.

  nude photograph

  here is the woman’s

  soft and vulnerable body,

  every where on her turning

  round into another

  where. shadows on her

  promising mysterious places

  promising the answers to

  questions impossible to ask.

  who could rest one hand here or here

  and not feel, whatever the shape

  of the great hump longed for

  in the night, a certain joy, a certain,

  yes, satisfaction, yes.

  this is for the mice that live

  behind the baseboard,

  she whispered, her fingers

  thick with cheese. what i do

  is call them, copying their own

  voices; please please please

  sweet please. i promise

  them nothing. they come

  bringing nothing and we sit

  together, nuzzling each other’s

  hungry hands. everything i want

  i have to ask for, she sighed.

  sleeping beauty

  when she woke up

  she was terrible.

  under his mouth her mouth

  turned red and warm

  then almost crimson as the coals

  smothered and forgotten

  in the grate.

  she has been gone so long.

  there was so much to unlearn.

  she opened her eyes.

  he was the first thing she saw

  and she blamed him.

  a woman who loves

  impossible men

  sits a long time indoors

  watching her windows

  she has no brother

  who understands

  where she is not going

  her sisters offer their

  own breasts up, full and

  creamy vessels but she

  cannot drink because

  she loves impossible men

  a woman who loves

  impossible men

  listens at night to music

  she cannot sing

  she drinks good sherry

  swallowing around the notes

  rusted in her throat

  but she does not fill

  she is already full

  of love for impossible men

  a woman who loves

  impossible men

  promises each morning

  that she will take this day in her

  hands

  disrobe it lie with it

  learn to love it

  but she doesn’t she walks by

  strangers walks by kin

  forgets their birthmarks

  their birthdays

  remembers only the names

  the stains of impossible men

  man and wife

  she blames him, at the last, for

  backing away from his bones

  and his woman, from the life

  he promised her was worth

  cold sheets. she blames him

  for being unable to see

  the tears in her eyes, the birds

  hovered by the window, for love being

  not enough, for leaving.

  he blames her, at the last, for

  holding him back with her eyes

  beyond when the pain was more

  than he was prepared to bear,

  for the tears he could neither

  end nor ignore, for believing

  that love could be enough,

  for the birds, for the life

  so difficult to leave.

  poem in praise of menstruation

  if there is a river

  more beautiful than this

  bright as the blood

  red edge of the moon if

  there is a river

  more faithful than this
>
  returning each month

  to the same delta if there

  is a river

  braver than this

  coming and coming in a surge

  of passion, of pain if there is

  a river

  more ancient than this

  daughter of eve

  mother of cain and of abel if there is in

  the universe such a river if

  there is some where water

  more powerful than this wild

  water

  pray that it flows also

  through animals

  beautiful and faithful and ancient

  and female and brave

  peeping tom

  sometimes at night he dreams back

  thirty years

  to the alley outside our room

  where he stands, a tiptoed boy

  watching the marvelous thing

  a man turning into a woman.

  sometimes

  beating himself with his own fist

  into that spilled boy and the

  imagined world of that man

  that woman that night, he lies

  turned from his natural wife.

  sometimes he searches the window for

  a plaid cap, two wide eyes.

  ways you are not like oedipus

  for Michael Glaser

  you have spared your father

  you pass the sphinx without

  answering you recognized

  your mother in time

  your sons covet only

  their own kingdoms

  you lead your daughters

  even in your blindness

  you do not wander far

  from your own good house

  it is home and you know it

  the killing of the trees

  the third went down

  with a sound almost like flaking,

  a soft swish as the left leaves

  fluttered themselves and died.

  three of them, four, then five

  stiffening in the snow

  as if this hill were Wounded Knee

  as if the slim feathered branches

  were bonnets of war

  as if the pale man seated

  high in the bulldozer nest

  his blonde mustache ice-matted

  was Pahuska come again but stronger now,

  his long hair wild and unrelenting.

  remember the photograph,

  the old warrior, his stiffened arm

  raised as if in blessing,

  his frozen eyes open,

  his bark skin brown and not so much

  wrinkled as circled with age,

  and the snow everywhere still falling,

  covering his one good leg.

  remember his name was Spotted Tail

  or Hump or Red Cloud or Geronimo

  or none of these or all of these.

  he was a chief. he was a tree

  falling the way a chief falls,

  straight, eyes open, arms reaching

  for his mother ground.

  so i have come to live

  among the men who kill the trees,

  a subdivision, new,

  in southern Maryland.

  I have brought my witness eye with me

  and my two wild hands,

  the left one sister to the fists

  pushing the bulldozer against the old oak,

  the angry right, brown and hard and spotted

  as bark. we come in peace,

  but this morning

  ponies circle what is left of life

  and whales and continents and children and ozone

  and trees huddle in a camp weeping

  outside my window and i can see it all

  with that one good eye.

  pahuska=long hair, lakota name for custer

  questions and answers

  what must it be like

  to stand so firm, so sure?

  in the desert even the saguro

  hold on as long as they can

  twisting their arms in

  protest or celebration.

  you are like me,

  understanding the surprise

  of jesus, his rough feet

  planted on the water

  the water lapping

  his toes and holding them.

  you are like me, like him

  perhaps, certain only that

  the surest failure

  is the unattempted walk.

  november 21, 1988

  25 years

  those days

  before the brain blew back

  mottled and rusting against the pink coat

  them days

  when the word had meaning

  as well as definition

  those days

  when honor was honorable and

  good and right were good and right

  them days

  when the spirit of hope

  reached toward us waving a wide hand

  and smiling toward us yes

  those days

  them days

  the days

  before the bubble closed

  over the top of the world no

  this is not better than that

  the beginning of the end of the world

  cockroach population possibly declining

  —news report

  maybe the morning the roaches

  walked into the kitchen

  bold with they bad selves

  marching up out of the drains

  not like soldiers like priests

  grim and patient in the sink

  and when we ran the water

  trying to drown them as if they were

  soldiers they seemed to bow their

  sad heads for us not at us

  and march single file away

  maybe then the morning we rose

  from our beds as always

  listening for the bang of the end

  of the world maybe then

  when we heard only the tiny tapping

  and saw them dark and prayerful

  in the kitchen maybe then

  when we watched them turn from us

  faithless at last

  and walk in a long line away

  the last day

  we will find ourselves surrounded

  by our kind all of them now

  wearing the eyes they had

  only imagined possible

  and they will reproach us

  with those eyes

  in a language more actual

  than speech

  asking why we allowed this

  to happen asking why

  for the love of God

  we did this to ourselves

  and we will answer

  in our feeble voices because

  because because

  eight-pointed star

  wild blessings

  licked in the palm of my hand

  by an uninvited woman. so i have held

  in that hand the hand of a man who

  emptied into his daughter, the hand

  of a girl who threw herself

  from a tenement window, the trembling

  junkie hand of a priest, of a boy who

  shattered across viet nam

  someone resembling his mother,

  and more. and more.

  do not ask me to thank the tongue

  that circled my fingers

  or pride myself on the attentions

  of the holy lost.

  i am grateful for many blessings

  but the gift of understanding,

  the wild one, maybe not.

  somewhere

  some woman

  just like me

  tests the lock on the window

  in the children’s room,

  lays out tomorrow’s school clothes,

  sets the table for breakfast early,

  finds a pen between the c
ushions

  on the couch

  sits down and writes the words

  Good Times.

  i think of her as i begin to teach

  the lives of the poets,

  about her space at the table

  and my own inexplicable life.

  1

  when i stand around among poets

  i am embarrassed mostly,

  their long white heads,

  the great bulge in their pants,

  their certainties.

  i don’t know how to do

  what i do in the way

  that i do it. it happens

  despite me and i pretend

  to deserve it.

  but i don’t know how to do it.

  only sometimes when

  something is singing

  i listen and so far

  i hear.

  2

  when i stand around

  among poets, sometimes

  i hear a single music

  in us, one note

  dancing us through the

  singular moving world.

  water sign woman

  the woman who feels everything

  sits in her new house

  waiting for someone to come

  who knows how to carry water

  without spilling, who knows

  why the desert is sprinkled

  with salt, why tomorrow

  is such a long and ominous word.

  they say to the feel things woman

 

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