“Alec, please.” Gaige lifted his hips as he shoved at his pants. “Get these off.”
Impatience echoed in Gaige’s voice and the jerky movements of his hands. He nearly ripped his underwear as he stripped them down. It was awkward and wild and one of the sexiest things Alec had ever seen. He understood the pounding need because it hammered him, too.
With the clothing gone, Alec reached for the table next to the bed. His fingers couldn’t reach and he had to slide and climb over Gaige to get there. But when he felt Gaige’s mouth against his stomach and Gaige’s hand slipping over his ass, Alec stilled. He wanted to savor this moment.
“Yes.” Alec thought the word was trapped inside him until he heard the whisper slip into the silence of the room.
Gaige scooted down, just a few inches, but enough to slide his tongue around Alec’s tip. Then he took Alec’s cock in his mouth. Slid his closed palm up as his mouth pulled him inside.
Alec’s hips moved. He pressed forward, helping Gaige, guiding his mouth. The caress of Gaige’s lips sent a moan racing up Alec’s throat. He bit it back, but just barely. His body wanted this. Every cell and every muscle.
Shaking his head, he tried to force his mind back to the present. To think about how good it would feel when Gaige’s body surrounded him and pulled him in deep.
Reality flashed in his head. He needed that fucking condom.
Making one last lunge, Alec grabbed for the drawer and yanked it out of the stand. He had the lube and a condom trapped in his closed fist when his body skimmed over Gaige’s again.
“Now it’s your turn.” Alec had said that before but this time they’d end with more than a hand job.
Alec kissed his way down Gaige’s chest and smiled when Gaige’s fingers slipped through his hair again. This time Alec didn’t let the touching stop him. He homed in on his target, wrapping his hand around the base of Gaige’s cock and pumping it up and down.
Flipping the cap on the lube proved harder with one hand, but Alec made it work. His hand slid under Gaige’s knee. He fanned his fingers against Gaige’s ass. As his mouth worked, Alec’s finger slipped inside Gaige, getting him ready.
His mouth moved in time with his fingers. Both drove Gaige until he groaned. His head rolled on the mattress and his ass clenched. A sexy tremble ran through him as he tightened his thighs against Alec’s hips.
Alec couldn’t last another second. He sat back on his knees. With one final wandering gaze over Gaige’s fit frame Alec opened the packet and rolled the condom on. He was rock hard and so ready. His hips started bucking the second he slipped the tip inside Gaige.
When the small internal muscles clenched around Alec’s cock, he dragged his hand down Gaige’s upraised thighs. Wrapped his fingers around his length. The touch had Gaige’s legs falling open. A fraction of relaxation and Alec sank fully inside. He plunged in deep and stilled, loving the grasp of Gaige’s body around his. Letting the pleasure drag him under.
“Jesus, Alec. Move.” Gaige reached for Alec’s hips and dragged them even closer. “Fuck me now.”
Alec wanted Gaige to beg. That strained sound in Gaige’s voice drove Alex right to the edge, made him want to tie Gaige down and take him. Just thinking about dominating Gaige, about being in control of his pleasure, started Alec moving. He pressed in and out. With each plunge his body ached to move faster.
Their bodies slapped together. Every time Alec pulled back, Gaige pushed forward. The rhythm sent a new wave of heat crashing over Alec. He could hear Gaige chant his name and feel his fingers close on his ass. Every sound and touch played in Alec’s head as his body took over.
In and out, faster with each beat. There was nothing soft or sweet about this mating. This was a crazed frenzy of need. Neither of them thought or planned. This was all about heat and satisfaction.
The orgasm started rolling through Alec. He could feel it build and beg for release. He held it back but his control wouldn’t last. He’d thought about this moment since the first second he saw Gaige. Watching him now with his jaw clenching as he started to come, Alec gave in.
He slid his fingers over Gaige as he pumped into him, all in a haze that called out for him to go faster and deeper. He was lost now. His hips moved and common sense abandoned him. Another thrust and he came. He pumped into Gaige, emptying and not trying to hold back. With the squeeze of his hand, Gaige came with him.
They both shifted on the mattress. The comforter bunched beneath them and the headboard knocked into the wall from the force of it all.
When he finished, Alec fell forward. His chest pressed hard against Gaige who let out a small oof. Then his hands wrapped around Alec’s shoulders. For the next few minutes neither of them said anything. Their heavy breaths filled the room, mixing with the smell of sex.
Time ticked by. Alec could see his alarm clock, the one he never set because he woke at the exact same time every day no matter what happened the night before. The green numbers blurred as his eyes started to close.
Alec knew he needed to get up. He didn’t sleep—literally sleep—with other men in this bed. He ran from the “after” talk and touching because sex didn’t mix with the rest. He didn’t make that mistake.
This position, with his head tucked under Gaige’s chin, could only be described as cuddling, and Alec did not cuddle. But he didn’t move. Not yet.
The problem was the longer he waited, the more Gaige’s warmth wrapped around him. The slight sheen of sweat from Gaige’s body mixed with his own. Alec could hear the frantic beat of Gaige’s heart and feel a satisfied rumble in his chest.
Yeah, now. This had to end right now.
Alec forced his muscles to move. He pushed up on the mattress and slipped out of Gaige. That was all he could manage, the only separation he could manage. Even now when he should be getting on with the rest of his night, he sat next to Gaige’s thigh and skimmed his fingers over Gaige’s flat stomach.
“That was impressive.” Gaige didn’t make a move to leave.
Over or not, Alec refused to lie about that point. “Very.”
A few more uncomfortable seconds ticked by before Gaige sat up. “Right.”
“What?”
“I’m going to take a shower then head up to bed.” Gaige shifted. Threw one then the other leg over the far side of the bed. “A promise is a promise.”
Alec had no idea what Gaige was talking about. He almost asked when he saw Gaige flinch and reach for his side. That reminder had Alec scrambling across the mattress. “Are you okay?”
Gaige shot Alec one of those heated smiles.
“Great, actually.” Gaige stood up then. His feet hit the ground and he hesitated, but not for long before bending over and grabbing his shirt off the floor.
There were a thousand things he should say, Alec knew that. He could apologize for forgetting about the injury and not taking it a bit slower. Could find the pills Gaige got at the clinic. Maybe call Gaige back to bed.
Alec didn’t do any of it. He sat in silence as Gaige took careful steps around the room, gathering his clothes and piling them in one arm. Once, he pressed his fingers to the bruise on his side, the one he’d earned playing hero, but Alec didn’t even comment on that.
“Good night.” Gaige turned out the lights as he went, leaving Alec in total darkness.
Chapter 14
Gaige tried to turn over an hour later and gasped. The motion tugged on his injury and had his eyes opening in a surge of unexpected pain. He didn’t make a noise, but he knew something wasn’t right.
Sitting up, he balanced his upper body on his elbows and glanced around the loft. It didn’t take long to spy Alec. He sat in a chair facing the bed.
Knowing he was there didn’t spare the surprise. Gaige jerked as he bit back a long string of profanity. “Damn, Alec. That’s creepy as fuck.”
“Sorry.” But he didn’t move.
This seemed weird even for Alec. “Are you okay?”
“Did I hurt you?”
Okay, weirdly sweet and, well, just plain weird. “You know I’ve done that before, right? You weren’t my first.”
Alec let out one of his stop-being-a-dumbass exhales. “I’m talking about your side, idiot.”
“Oh, right.” Gaige pressed his fingers against the injury. His skin felt warm to the touch, but not hot. This bruise would ache for a while, but it was just that. Not serious. “I forgot all about it when you were inside me.”
“Me too.”
Alec still hadn’t moved and Gaige wasn’t clear on the protocol here. Alec had seemed uncomfortable and twitchy about sharing the bed, so Gaige left. Now he…well, he didn’t know what this was.
He should probably say good night, go back to sleep and not mess up the good hours they’d shared. Should but wasn’t going to. He excelled at messing things up, and he was about to do the same here. Take a perfectly good sex-on-the-side relationship and make Alec completely uncomfortable.
But maybe there was more happening here. Not that he wanted more…hell, he didn’t know what he wanted. Alec did that to him. Took everything Gaige thought he knew and flipped it inside out. And not after months of knowing each other. No, it had been only a few days. That’s all it took.
Ignoring self-preservation and every promise he’d made to himself after his ex fucked him over, Gaige slipped his hand underneath the edge of the covers and flipped them back. “Want to join me?”
For a few seconds Alec didn’t say anything. In the low light, Gaige couldn’t even tell if he blinked. He didn’t shift or tell Gaige to go to hell.
Then Alec stood up. Gaige was sure he was going to lecture him on the sex rules again and go downstairs.
“Move over.” Without another word, he slid in beside Gaige. Shifted until their legs touched then he laid down.
In the quiet, Gaige just sat there. Alec had managed to stun him, and not many things did that anymore. Rather than fight it or fuck it up with a stupid comment, Gaige slipped down and rested his head on the pillow. When he turned onto his good side, Alec followed. He carefully wrapped an arm low on Gaige’s hips, away from the injury.
Alec’s warm breath blew across the back of Gaige’s neck. He felt comforted and secure, two sensations he hadn’t experienced since Jase left him. But he didn’t point that out. Didn’t say anything. Even bit back a sigh when Alec’s legs curled under his own.
“Stop thinking.” Alec pulled Gaige tighter against him.
Gaige almost laughed. “That sounds funny coming from you.”
“You need sleep.”
He did. They did. It had been a long evening. A nice dinner followed by near death. Even Seth might find that combination strange.
Despite the pain and the memory of those car lights aiming right for Alec, something else played on Gaige’s mind. A small moment but one that stuck with him. He knew he should let it go, but that wasn’t his style. He investigated and poked around until he found answers, no matter how much trouble he got into.
“I want to ask you something first.” He reached for Alec’s hand and held it, half thinking it would be harder for him to bolt if they were connected physically.
“Really? Now?”
“You asked for permission again.” Gaige tucked their joined hands against his chest. “Did you really not think you had it? I mean, you can kind of consider me a sure thing while I’m here.”
“I’ll always ask.”
That didn’t clear up the confusion. “Why?”
Alec didn’t respond. His breathing evened out and his arm grew heavy on Gaige’s hip.
The reaction could have been worse. Gaige had suspected that asking anything personal might tick Alec off, so the quiet treatment was a step up. Ignoring it seemed like an improvement over stomping off.
A few more minutes of silence passed and Gaige started to drift off. Alec’s body heat soothed him.
“Clarissa,” Alec said into the silence.
Gaige’s eyes popped open. “What?”
“We had a sister named Clarissa. The youngest.”
His tone changed until it was edged with pain. Gaige knew he didn’t want to hear more.
“She went off to college happy and vibrant. Smart, the smartest of all of us, and funny. A complete baby-sister pain in the ass.” Alec’s breathing sounded more labored now.
Gaige wanted to turn around. To tell him he didn’t need to explain. But part of him wondered if Alec needed to say the words out loud, like some sort of relief of the poison surging through him. No matter how harsh or ugly, if he needed to get it out Gaige would listen.
So, he waited. He brushed his fingertips over Alec’s arm trying to offer some comfort but stayed quiet.
Another minute or two passed before Alec spoke again. “She took a bottle of pills the day after she turned nineteen. It didn’t make any sense at first. She came home for the weekend and something seemed wrong. She was so quiet, almost as if she’d folded in on herself. She didn’t want to talk and refused to leave her room.”
Without the words, Gaige knew. The clarity made him ache for the entire Drummond family. “Alec…”
“My parents wouldn’t talk about it. They made excuses and blamed her friends. Insisted the school messed up. But Griff found her diary. We read it and knew she’d been raped by a guy she thought was her friend. The piece of shit made a video.” Alec’s arm tightened around Gaige.
“Jesus.” It was worse than Gaige imagined, and he knew it was awful.
He didn’t know what else to say. There really weren’t words for this.
“I was seven years older, her big brother and the oldest, and I couldn’t save her. I didn’t even know she needed me until it was too late.” Alec’s voice sounded muffled and a little lost. “Ten years and the memory of that day won’t go away.”
Gaige wanted to turn around. Hold him. Do something, but he decided to just let Alec talk. “I can’t imagine.”
“Finding her.” Alec rubbed his forehead against Gaige’s back. “Going up there, calling her name and getting ready to give her a hard time about her moodiness.”
Gaige closed his eyes and searched for the right words. Nothing came to him, so he lifted their joined hands and kissed the back of Alec’s.
“So, I’ll always ask.” The flat tone of Alec’s voice made it sound as if the life had been sucked right out of him. “I know it’s probably annoying.”
“It isn’t. You should do what you need to do.” Gaige wanted to ask about the word always because it suggested this was more than a one-and-done…and while the idea shook him it didn’t send him running either.
“Thanks.” Some of the tightness left Alec’s voice.
Was that relief? Gaige didn’t know. But he sensed this moment meant something. He wasn’t sure why he was the recipient of Alec’s trust, but he didn’t fight it. “What happened to the guy?”
“He’s dead.”
Gaige started to ask for details but Alec’s breathing had already changed. He’d fallen asleep or he was pretending. Either way, Gaige couldn’t imagine sleeping much tonight.
Chapter 15
Alec sat at his desk the next morning and refused to look up from the file in his hands. He was trying to read the same sentence for the tenth time. The black ink blurred, not from exhaustion or eye strain. No, he couldn’t concentrate. Not after the info dump he’d unloaded on Gaige last night.
He had no idea what compelled him to go into the loft. Sure, he’d made mental excuses about needing to check on Gaige’s injury because that seemed like a non-shitty host thing to do. Other people who regularly welcomed houseguests would know the rules, but he didn’t.
But that was bullshit. Every lame reason he came up with just covered the reality—he wanted to be with Gaige last night. Not just for sex. So when Gaige asked about consent it was as if Alec couldn’t raise the shields fast enough and the sick facts spilled out.
The unbelievable thing was that for the first time in ten years the ache in his chest had eased for a
few minutes. The guilt pummeled all the time, for years. Even now he couldn’t see a coed who looked even a little like Clarissa without everything inside him shriveling.
Gaige made it easier to unload. He didn’t pepper him with questions or say any of the stupid shit about her being in a better place. She should be here, working at the office. That she wasn’t would never be okay and Gaige seemed to get that.
“You had some excitement last night?”
At the sound of Finn’s voice, Alec’s head shot up. “Excuse me?”
He couldn’t mean…he couldn’t know.
Finn’s eyebrow rose. “I’m not sure what you’re thinking, but I’m talking about the accident, or what I told the press was an accident.”
There really wasn’t a way to hide the story. Pam knew and had switched into high-security mode. Alec had texted Tony and his brothers. Griff was the one to ask about Alec taking Gaige to dinner, which Alec ignored. He could only imagine the information that pinged back and forth between Tony, Finn and Griff after that. The police had been called. Seth knew.
Alec wasn’t a fan of making his personal life public, but Finn needed to know the truth. “It wasn’t an accident.”
“I’m hoping you’re just being paranoid.”
“Someone has tried to kill me before, remember? I know what that feels like.” There had been more than one overt attempt and a mysterious incident or two that Alec chalked up to ruthless business tactics.
“It’s kind of hard to forget since we were related to the last guy who stalked you.”
Their uncle. His desperation and panic to keep the business and hide his dealings. Alec would never forget any of it. He was lucky not to be sitting in prison because of it. “Let’s not—”
“Hey.” There was a knock on the partially opened door and Gaige’s face popped up in the space. “Sorry to interrupt.”
“Whatever you have to say will be a welcome distraction because we’re talking about family dysfunction.” Alec waved to Gaige to come in.
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