“You can ask anything. Always.”
Ann lowered her pants, stepped out of them, and draped them over the chair. The pink lace bra and panties were a beautiful contrast to her cinnamon skin.
She peeled those off as well as Raven tried to focus her attention on the woman’s face, rather than her perky breasts, a thin waist that spread out into a perfectly rounded ass attached to legs that seemed to go on forever.
Completely naked, Ann settled back into the chair, crossed one leg over the other, and took a sip of her drink.
“When did you know you liked women?”
“I’ve known since I was five.” She smiled. “I had my first two kisses playing house. One from a boy and the other a girl. When I kissed the girl, the moment our lips touched, something tingled, and from then on, that’s the way it went.”
“Kissing girls?”
“Playing house. Kissing boys first and girls a lot longer. “ She moved from the chair to the edge of the bed. “I knew for sure at twelve. No more kissing boys. I had my first girlfriend then. We managed to keep it a secret until we both got married.”
“What happened to her?”
A flash of tears welled in Ann’s dark brown eyes and she looked away. “When her husband found out about us, he flew into a rage and killed her.”
Pain stabbed Raven’s chest and her hand instinctively flew to cover her heart. She didn’t mean to bring up an unhappy memory. She had too many of her own.
“My husband had a different reaction,” Ann said with a bitter smile. “He was disappointed I hadn’t asked him to join in. He’s the one who brought me to the Castle. We’d probably still be married if I’d been honest with him about my needs up front.”
Raven fidgeted. Should she have told Pierce?
Ann leaned back on the bed, giving Raven an unobstructed view of her body as she trailed a hand over her own lush curves.
Raven took in every graceful move. “You’re so…womanly.”
Ann’s laughter trilled out before she could rein it in. “Sweetheart, I hate to inform you, but a certain part of my anatomy makes that a given.”
The woman moved to perch on the arm of Raven’s chair. “I know what you meant, sweetheart.” A single finger trailed along Raven’s face. “Isn’t that why you chose me rather than one of the others?”
Raven nodded, swallowing against the thrill of excitement flowing through her.
“You made an assumption earlier, almost insulted some of the women in that room. You need to get it out of your mind that lesbians are one way or another. There are women you come across every day whom you would never suspect. Just because I look soft and feminine, doesn’t mean I can’t love you as hard and long as one who looks masculine.”
“Those types frighten me.”
“Somehow, I think I frighten you more.” Ann leaned in, pressed a gentle kiss on Raven’s cheek and pulled away to note the younger woman’s reaction. “I look and act just like you—could actually be you on a given day. Sensuous,” she kissed Raven again, this time on her mouth, “strong, focused, sultry. A woman all about her business. In a number of ways I am you—and you’re just grateful that it’s not as obvious with me as it is with Barb, the other woman who almost outbid me for you.”
Ann took Raven’s hands, placed them on her chest. A finger trailed along the outside, as her hands cupped the woman’s breasts with trembling fingers.
“See, you wouldn’t be able to do this with Barb—she’s a touch-me-not. A stone butch.”
Raven blinked. “What’s that?” She explored the depth, texture and weight of Ann’s breasts, smaller and different from her own.
“A lesbian who doesn’t want her lover to touch any parts that identify her as a woman—especially the breasts.”
“No touching?” Raven frowned. “But doesn’t that take the fun out of things?”
“It certainly does for me.” Ann’s hand gripped Raven’s, halting her quick movements. “Take your time, Raven. I’m not going anywhere.”
Using a slight touch, Raven explored Ann, watching the woman become more aroused with each movement. Years of masturbation helped guide her fingers across erogenous zones that mirrored her own.
The moment Ann arched against the fingers pleasuring her core, Raven’s ego soared. She, too, was wet.
Ann sat up, coming off the throes of a simmering, but graceful orgasm, moved in slowly, cautiously, as though Raven would run, before pressing her lips to Raven’s—then gently at first, teasingly explored the depths of Raven’s mouth with her moist tongue. Raven tensed for a moment as the fact that this was a woman overrode the fact that it was, indeed, pleasurable.
Ann pulled away, saying, “Stop thinking, Raven, and just let it flow.”
Raven closed her eyes, surrendering to the pleasure of Ann’s touch, as the woman’s lips trailed a path of fire down the soft curves of Raven’s neck, then lowered to flicker her tongue across Raven’s breasts, eliciting a small gasp. Ann followed by cupping her breast and teased to the point that Raven gripped the woman’s head to bring her fully in. Moments later a tiny orgasm ripped through her.
Ann stood, took Raven’s hands, and led her to the bed. She held Raven in her arms, positioning her until she lay across the bed, cushioned between the velvet pillows.
The moment the woman’s soft hands traveled to the nestle of curls, Raven stiffened again, trying to shut off her mind and also attempting to push away all thoughts of Pierce. Pierce’s touch was more solid, sure, certainly comforting and contrasting, but was it better? No, just damn good.
Ann dipped down, keeping a firm grip on Raven’s buttocks as she lifted the younger woman’s hips, parted her thighs, flicked her tongue across the crowning pearl, and watched as Raven bucked with fierce pleasure.
Raven reached out, covering herself. “Ann, they said we couldn’t go this far.”
“I wasn’t trying to check up under the hood, sweetheart, I’m just testing the toys on the dashboard.”
Raven still didn’t budge.
“What happens in my room—stays in my room.”
“But—”
“Raven, your results are clear.” Ann uncurled Raven’s hand, trying to pull it away. “That’s why you had to wait in the med lab all that time.”
“But not clear enough for this,” Raven countered. “They said I could go forward with ‘no exchange of intimate bodily fluids.’ “
Ann rested her chin on Raven’s thigh. “You allowed me to kiss you.”
“That’s different. I know what they meant and so do you.” Her gaze flickered across the room, landing on everything, but staying with nothing in particular. “And I don’t want you to think I’ll return the favor.”
Ann blinked twice, waiting.
“Now that I’m here, I thought I could do…everything. But I don’t see myself putting my mouth on any woman’s—I just—you know,” Raven shrugged. “There’s a lot going on down there—a woman’s pussy is set to kill, not stun.”
Ann roared with laughter and pulled away.
Raven sighed, reaching for the beautiful woman. “Please don’t be insulted. I—”
Ann patted her shoulder. “If you had any doubts about whether you’re a lesbian or not—you should know your answer.”
“I don’t get your meaning.”
Ann crossed her legs Indian-style. “A true lesbian or bisexual woman loves every essence of a woman—head to toe—not select parts. The touch, feel, scent, taste, look—all of it. It’s a state of mind and being.” Ann grinned at Raven’s confusion. “Some, like me, know early in life; some are seduced; others fall in after their first time, but they all have one thing in common—they enjoy what the experience entails.”
“But you weren’t always that way. Three children, married.”
Ann leaned back on the bed. “I did what was expected of me. Marry, have children, all the while I knew in my heart that a woman was what I wanted most.” Her lips twisted into a frown. “Nothing changed that�
�at any time. Not marriage, not sleeping with my husband or pleasing him. And trust me,” her lips spread into a smile “he had no complaints. I waited until my last child was in college before fully giving in to who I really was. I didn’t think it was fair to my children to do anything before then. I never wanted them to use my lifestyle as an excuse for how fucked up they might think their childhood was. There was already enough to draw on.”
Raven bristled. “I was raised by lesbians. I don’t think I’m so fucked up.”
Ann didn’t laugh out loud, but the twinkle in her eyes showed she wanted to.
“What’s so funny?” Raven demanded, pulling the sheet around her.
“A little while ago in the bidding room you were thumbing your nose at one aspect of the lifestyle, and now you’re defending it to a certain extent.” Ann moved forward and clasped Raven’s hands. “Would you be here if your parents were straight?”
“I’ve already done straight sex.”
“That’s the point. You wait two years, come to a place so you can have an experience that isn’t readily accepted. You can get dick anywhere.”
“Yeah, but what a woman really wants is good dick.”
“Speak for yourself.”
They shared a laugh.
“I don’t think questioning who I am makes me fucked up.”
Ann reached out to stroke Raven’s face. “The fact that the question has plagued you all your life says a great deal. Is it genetic? Did some of them rub off on me? But I think you have your answers, now?”
“I’m not gay.”
Ann shook her head.
“I’m not bisexual, either.”
Ann shrugged, a sign of maybe.
“But I enjoyed…this.”
“Given the opportunity and with the right person—male or female—anyone can get pleasured by someone else. But that has nothing to do with who you really want to be with.” Ann gave her a sly grin. “Did you know you whispered his name while the women placed their bids for the opportunity to be your first?”
Raven’s eyes widened. She couldn’t remember. She was so frightened.
“Oh, I’m not offended, but I will give you a piece of advice.”
Ann nibbled on her bottom lip, then locked gazes with Raven. “After this experience—and you do still want the experience, right?”
Raven whispered a breathy, “If I don’t, you’ll lose all that money.”
“I’m not worried about the money, sweetheart. And trust me, I won’t lose a dime. What I want is a willing woman, virgin territory—those are the kind of women who derive the most pleasure from this.”
Raven averted her gaze for a moment. “You were giving me some advice.”
“Don’t come back to this wing again. If you’re so inclined, bring your….mate to be tested and hit the swingers wing, but not here. Do you feel me?”
Ann was forbidding her to come back to this place?
“I take it that you’re the type of woman who needs love to feel complete. What you feel for him is love. If you love him, don’t play with him. This right here with me is not about love—it’s all about giving and receiving pleasure.” She uncrossed her legs, slid next to Raven, and slipped her hands across the ample breasts. “Anyone—male or female—can make love to you, and it can be mind-bending sex if you open yourself to it. I did it for years. But for it to last, it has to mean something. Has to be about who you make love to. And what’s obvious to me is that you want that man.” Ann pressed a gentle kiss to Raven’s shoulder. “Have you ever had an overwhelming attraction to a woman or wanted to make love to a woman?”
“No, but I liked when you—”
“That’s not what I’m asking.”
Raven closed her eyes for a moment, then sighed. “Then no, but I always wanted to know what was the driving force behind my mothers. What was so great about it that they would both leave their husbands to be together? What was it about their lifestyle that made their exes so angry?”
“Well, it’s nothing men can compete with. Ego’s involved. ‘I wasn’t man enough to hold my woman,’” Ann deepened her voice and crooked her fingers like quotation marks as she said it, “‘so she went to a woman for loving.’ Men can’t handle that.” She let out a resentful laugh. “This type of relationship has been a threat for eons; it’s something that they can’t control. And that’s the real issue. Control. If they want to see a little girl-on-girl action, everything’s cool, but let the woman enjoy the other woman more than him…” Ann’s tone became somber, yet tinged with sadness. “And speaking of control, if you’re ever in my bed again, it’s a whole new game. I’ll take it easy on you this time, but the next time, when I’m done with you,” she flicked a fingertip over Raven’s pearl, causing her body to arch, “you won’t even remember your fucking name. You hear me?”
The dark brown depths of Ann’s gaze was so intense, Raven was forced to look away, whispering, “Yes, Ann. I hear you.”
Thirty-Seven
Twenty-four hours later, Pierce had had enough. He booked the next flight out and had the doorman call him a cab. An hour later, as he waited for his flight, his phone rang. He answered, hoping it was Raven. No such luck.
“Eric, what’s going on?”
“Marie just landed at Midway.”
Pierce scanned the area, saying, “I’m at Midway.”
“You’re leaving? But I thought—”
“Your mother has made it abundantly clear where her priorities are. I’m not one of them.”
Eric let out a long sigh, whining, “Y’all fell out again?”
Pierce didn’t bother to respond.
“We’re supposed to meet Mom at Blu 47. Can you be there?”
He hated to inform the little fellow that there was a good possibility that Raven would be a no-show. She must be having one hell of a time for her not to pick up the phone, send a text—something. Was she having sex with that man? With his wife? Was that what it was all about? Swinging? Did Raven complete their little threesome?
One thing was for certain, whatever the hell was going on, whenever Raven resurfaced, she’d get his take on her “secrecy.” He wouldn’t be there. To hell with this!
“My flight leaves in thirty minutes. I really think you can handle this on your own,” Pierce said, fighting back emotions he couldn’t quite name. Raven had really put one over on him. What the hell was the woman really into? And if she loved him so much, why couldn’t she have told the truth?
“Please?” Eric whined. “Pierce, you know Mom will go off the deep end if you’re not around.”
Hell, Raven went off the deep end even when he was present. Being there didn’t mean much. Not much at all.
First he’d landed a woman who had rejected him because he couldn’t give her the children she desired. Now he had a woman who’d rather live in secrecy than trust him with the truth. He would never be enough for Raven either. Could he accept that she’d disappear from time to time into this Castle underground? Did she expect him to sit on the sidelines and just be patient while she did God-knows-what with God-knows-whom? What did she have to be sure about? About being with him? Damn! That hurt like hell. She’d said he was the perfect man. And he had thought she was the perfect woman.
Evidently perfection was a moving target. And he’d missed—again.
❤ ❤ ❤
Raven walked into the condo early on Sunday morning—a whole day and a half after she had promised she would return. Where had the time gone? She went from room to room, only to find that Pierce was missing. He left a note saying, “I had some business to take care of,” which made her wonder. He didn’t have business in Chicago yet. Well, besides her, of course.
She would tell him everything. She had to and if she lost him, then he wasn’t the man for her after all. Raven refused to think about the fact that she had probably lost him already. And for what? Ava had been so right.
She quickly showered, changed and hit the door.
Eric had invited
her to Sunday brunch at Blu 47—an eclectic but modern restaurant in an area once called “the low end,” but with an outpouring of money and redevelopment and a sprinkle of white folks, it was now called, the new Bronzeville. When Raven walked in, she was surprised to see that Pierce was already there. His angry glare, lips set in a thin hard line didn’t signal happiness at her presence. His gaze flickered over her body as if trying to denote any signs of change. Then he looked away at nothing in particular. A vein throbbed at his temple.
She focused her attention on her son. “Eric.” She leaned forward to kiss him.
Pierce stood and pulled out the only available seat, which happened to be next to him. She started to lean over to kiss him and whisper an apology and a promise to tell him everything, but froze midway as she noticed the young, freckled-face woman next to Eric. “Who are you?”
“Mom, this is Marie. Let’s eat first, then talk.”
She had no choice since Eric and the young woman left her at the table as they quickly headed for the buffet. Pierce turned, shifted her chair enough for her to get out, then trailed the youngsters. He didn’t wait to see if Raven was coming or not. Oh, things were pretty bad if he was giving her his back to ponder.
“Pierce?”
He tossed a stony look over his shoulder and kept moving. Raven grimaced and fell in line.
Minutes later, as they dined on everything from grits to greens, Raven said, “Eric, quit stalling.” So far she’d learned the young woman’s name was Marie, but had no clue as to why she was dining with them.
Eric looked at Pierce, then back at Raven.
“And don’t get fresh either. You’re still young enough for me to whip your little tail.”
“Not so little anymore.”
“Neither are the paddles I use.”
Pierce smirked.
What was he thinking? And why was he here if he was just going to give her the cold shoulder?
“Well, Mom, I’ve got good news and good news.”
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