He shook his head and smiled softly. “I’m not worried about what we’ve done. I’m worried that I won’t be able to stop.”
12
Honestly, my brain was more than a little annoying at times. Given how crazy this time of year was at school and the fact I was trying to cover everything that Professor Mickelson was sending me via e-mail regarding his research, and handling the hiring process of our student assistant for the next term, the last thing I should be doing was setting up a sex board in my apartment.
And yet, here I was.
I’d had my old corkboard since high school. Dad bought it for me when he realized that I did better in school when I could visualize things. It helped me piece together threads that might have escaped me otherwise. Eventually I got good enough that I retired the old board to the back of my closet.
I’d hauled it out and set it up on the wall in my spare bedroom, which I used as an office. On one side I pinned a card at the top labeled 30 Nights. Beneath it I pinned the Day Ten card at the top.
“Prehistoric Pinterest.” I laughed.
The first card had been random and a whole shit-ton of fun. Before we’d left the hotel room, Eric had asked if he could pick the next one. I wasn’t about to say no, because sex. But given that he was using this as a means to get over . . . something, I wanted to try to track his choices so I could figure out what that something was.
Which brought me to the second half of my board.
Along the top I pinned a third card labeled EM. On the off chance someone unexpectedly stumbled into my bedroom and saw this, I wanted to make sure that I held up my end and did not reveal his identity. But it was a column and they needed titles and so this was my compromise.
I wanted to try to add everything that I could to that list, which was unsurprisingly not very much. In fact, everything I knew fit nice and neatly onto one card. Green, steak, Harry Connick Jr., Little Shop of Horrors (original ending), poker neophyte.
That was more than a little depressing.
There had to be something more.
I cocked my head to the side and stared at what was written there again. Nope, that didn’t do much to change my perspective. Maybe if I got a drink it would loosen up the cogs in my brain.
“Drink!”
I started a new card and neatly printed Claude. There was at least one personal thing that I knew. His childhood friend whom he was obviously still close to. Proud of myself, I added the card to the board and took a step back. Self high-five.
The phone rang and I answered it without looking away from the board. “Hello?”
“Hello.”
My breath caught in my throat at the sound of Eric’s voice. Somehow I’d forgotten that I’d given him my number before leaving last night. “Hi there. How’s your Sunday going so far?”
“Wonderful.” There was a long pause, and I couldn’t be sure but I thought I heard rustling on the other end. “How are you?”
My God, I thought I was the awkward one? “Are you freaking out? I didn’t think guys freaked out about sex.” In a way it was strangely reassuring that he wasn’t all cocky and arrogant about this. Though it did change a few of my more consistent fantasies about him and a whole BDSM thing. He was dark and a bit broody, but didn’t give off the dominant vibe.
I tucked the phone against my neck and grabbed another card. Not a Dom.
By the time I’d added the card to the list, I realized that he still hadn’t said anything. “I had a great time last night. And I’m sorry I kicked your ass so badly at poker. I won’t suggest that again.”
“I might have to take you to Vegas. We could be rich.”
This was better, a bit of teasing to break the ice. “I promised my Great Glenna that I’d never do that. Something about mobsters. I think she’d seen too many Scorsese movies.”
“I have a question for you.”
“Okay.”
“You said you had a good evening.”
“I did.” My body hummed for hours afterward.
“Why didn’t you stay the night?” There wasn’t anything accusatory about the question, more curiosity.
I had wanted to stay. I really had wanted nothing more than to have stretched out on that bed and woken up to him and room service this morning. “I wanted to. I really did. But in a way it was probably best that I didn’t.”
“Why not?”
“Well . . .” You just wanted this to be about sex and then you told me that you didn’t think you’d be able to stop and me sleeping in your arms would have fucked with my brain too much and made this way harder. “I guess I’m just trying to keep things . . . professional? No, umm, I’m trying to keep that boundary.”
“We’re going to have thirty sexual encounters. It stands to reason that we will form a certain attachment to each other. Even if it’s not romantic.”
“Which you don’t want?”
“No. Not the romantic one. But I realized after you left that I was giving some mixed signals. You don’t deserve that.”
Disappointment clawed at me. “It was all fine. I know something happened to you and this is just an unexpected way to help you get over things. I’m cool with that. It’s helping me, too. I’m learning to be more adventurous. It’s win-win.”
“You’re an amazing woman. I hope you realize that.”
Thank God he couldn’t see me blushing. “You’re not so bad yourself.”
“So we are both in agreement that we want to continue?”
“We are.” Like I was going to be able to stop now.
“Good. I wanted to make sure that you didn’t have any second thoughts about our arrangement.”
“Second thoughts about having hot sex with an attractive, kind, and charming man? Hang on, let me think. Umm, no, no, I think I might be really fine with that. Especially if said man was calling to see if I had any plans tonight.”
I hadn’t heard Eric laugh very often, so hearing it now coming through my phone ignited a warm, fuzzy ball of joy inside me.
“I was hoping you might be free. I had a look at the cards and there was one that I thought might be fun for both of us.”
My legs began to tremble and I sat down on the edge of the bed. “Oh?”
“Are you interested?”
“You haven’t told me what it is yet.”
“No, I haven’t.”
Dear God, if he had a playful side on top of everything else he was going to completely ruin me for all other men. “What time do you want to pick me up?”
“Seven. And I don’t normally tell my dates what to wear, but it would be . . . easier if you wore one of those beautiful skirts of yours.”
So, this was me dying of lust. “I’ll text you my address.”
By the time seven o’clock rolled around, I was a mess of nerves. I’d chosen a different skirt, one that was a bit shorter than the previous ones I’d considered for the night. I might be short, but I do have nice legs and love showing them off whenever I have a chance.
Small but mighty. And sexy.
Eric had texted me to let me know that he was on his way. Rather than make him come all the way up to my apartment and run the risk of him seeing my crazy sex-and-Eric obsession board, I told him I’d wait for him outside.
Punctual as ever, he pulled up at six fifty-seven and I bolted for his car before anything strange could stop our evening. I still didn’t have a clue what he had in mind, but I hoped it would be as unexpected as our first night. I hopped in, slammed the door shut, and turned in the seat to face him. “Hey.”
Instead of his normal dress shirt and pants, dude was wearing a tight-fitting T-shirt and jeans. I totally might have drooled a bit at the unexpected casual look. Who could blame me? He was hot all dressed up and formal; like this he was lethal.
A not-quite smile tweaked at his lips. One of these days I was going to get him to grin.
“Hello. You look lovely.”
“Thank you.” I had told myself that I wasn’t going to
blush if he paid me any compliments. Fail! “You look great too.”
Eric pulled his car into traffic and off we went. He didn’t say anything about our destination, but I couldn’t help but feel an undercurrent of excitement coming from him. Knowing that he was excited made my anticipation for what was to come even higher. So when we pulled into the parking lot of a movie theater, I was a bit let down.
“Is there something good playing? I haven’t checked the listings in ages.”
“Mind pulling your skirt up and taking your panties off?”
There were my owl eyes back again. “What?”
Eric reached into the backseat of the car and pulled out a small U-shaped vibrator. “It’s clean, but if you’d like me to give it another once-over I brought some wipes.”
“Day Twenty-six.” I couldn’t believe that this was the second card that he’d chosen for us. Especially after all of the teasing Jasmine had given me over it. This was very much one-sided—my side—and it would be more than a little challenging. I sucked on my bottom lip and counted backward from ten in my head.
“You can say no.”
“No way.” I let out a breathy little laugh. I’d been looking to do something that was adventurous, and this more than qualified. “I’m just wondering how long I’ll last. Just looking at that thing and I’m ready to come. Honestly though, I’m not sure I could do that in public.” Even if I really wanted to.
“It has a remote control. I’m going to keep it, run the controls.” He took my hand and placed it on my palm. “I’m going to get out of the car. You can decide if you want to do this or not. I won’t know until I press the remote and that won’t be until after the movie starts. If you leave it in the car, all is fine. I just hope you don’t mind horror movies.”
And with that he got out, leaving me alone in his Lexus to make a decision.
My gaze was locked on the vibrator. It was a We-Vibe, which I’d seen at the Toronto Sex Show that Jasmine had dragged me to last fall. She’d tried to convince me to buy one, but I just couldn’t afford it at the time. This one still had that new silicone smell—and wasn’t that weird to realize that I could tell?
The silicone material was bright pink, not something that would go missing easily and totally clashed with my bra and pantie set. It would easily slip inside me, one end to press against my clit while the other pressed against my G-spot. The experience would be one for the books, that much was certain.
The only problem was that this was a public place. We could get caught and that would put us both in a horrible position. Though it was remote controlled . . . and no one would be able to see it . . .
“Shit,” I muttered as I spread my legs.
Was I really going to do this?
I looked out the window to see where Eric was. He’d stepped in front of the parked car, but had his back to the window. There was no way that he’d be able to see what I was doing. He wouldn’t know until the moment he pressed the start button. I wondered if he’d be as surprised as me.
There was only one way to tell. I guess this was going to happen.
I didn’t bother taking my panties off, instead pulling them to the side. The cotton was stretched hard against the side of my thigh while I slid the vibrator into place. The bulky part moved smoothly into my pussy and the other edge cradled my mound and rested perfectly on my clit. A long, shaky breath escaped me once everything settled into place. A quick adjustment of my panties and skirt and no one would be the wiser to what I had going on between my legs.
How the hell was I going to walk with this thing inside me without him noticing?
Acting wasn’t my strong suit, but I wanted to make a concerted effort to keep him guessing. It turned out to not be as difficult as I’d assumed. The vibrator was held in place by my panties, so I wasn’t worried about it slipping out of my pussy and falling onto the asphalt.
Because if that happened, I would die. Like on the spot, oh my God dead!
I fixed my skirt and took a few tentative steps forward, before I relaxed and enjoyed the foreign sensation. “Okay. I’ve made my decision.”
Eric looked me over, but didn’t ask the question I’m sure he was dying to know the answer to. Instead, he held out his arm for me to take. “Shall we?”
The movie theater was packed. A new family movie must have just released because the lobby was swarming with kids and their respective harried adult guardians. I generally loved children, but I could honestly say that I’d never been so self-conscious in my life.
Eric already had tickets, but led me over to the concession line. “I know it’s not healthy, but I love the popcorn.” He looked a bit sheepish with the admission. “Let me treat you to something.”
He was seriously going to kill me with the cuteness. That in itself was weird given how I’d never once considered him cute. Handsome. Serious. Intelligent. Sexy.
But not this warm, fuzzy normalness that made me want to hug him to death. It was new and I kind of liked it.
I leaned in against his arm and took a moment to soak in the warmth of his body. “I’ve been trying to be good when it comes to my eating. But I wouldn’t say no to a package of Twizzlers.”
It was weird, but he actually relaxed as we stepped up to the counter. Like he too wasn’t certain if this was a date or simply a weird sex thing. I was acting like a date, so that made it easier for him, too. “One large popcorn and a package of Twizzlers, please.”
Not once had I considered that Eric might be nervous about our little outing. After all, he wasn’t the one with a vibrator shoved inside him. But when I thought about it, it made sense. He couldn’t know how I’d react to his proposal, if I’d go through with it or run out screaming. Despite him being the one with the remote, I was in charge. Hell, if I changed my mind at any time, all I would have to do would be to go to the bathroom and take the thing out. Pervy case closed.
In that moment the muscles in my back and neck relaxed. My anticipation also rose, as did my awareness of Eric’s actions. He didn’t have the remote in his hand yet, but it would only be a matter of time before the fun started.
We found our theater and managed to get seats that weren’t too close to the front. Conversation was awkward at first as we started chatting off and on about work and the new semester. He asked me some questions about what I was working on for Mickelson, but my mind was too scattered to go much into detail.
The problem was the remote. Or the lack of remote sighting, as the case was. I knew I shouldn’t focus on it, but I couldn’t help but sneak glances at his hands to see if he was holding it or not.
He wasn’t.
Not yet at least.
Dammit, why had I agreed to this?
When the lights finally went down, there were several loud whoops from a group of students who’d conglomerated in the middle rows behind us. I normally didn’t bother seeing horror movies, not because they scared me, but just the opposite. I found them predictable and more annoying than anything. With a few notable exceptions, they just weren’t my thing.
Depending on how things went tonight, I might have to reevaluate my opinion.
The trailers started and I settled into my seat. Our arms brushed as we shared an armrest, bare skin on skin. There was no way I’d be able to pay attention to what was on the screen, so I focused on relaxing so that he wasn’t at least immediately aware that I’d used the vibrator. I let my mind wander and steadied my breathing.
The previews and commercials finished and the theater filled with ominous music. The opening sequence was typically my favorite part of all horror movies. They set the tone and told me if this was going to be one that I’d giggle through, or if I might have an opportunity to actually be scared. Within thirty seconds, I knew this was going to be the former. The acting wasn’t bad, but the trope wasn’t one that did it for me. Demonic possessions? Not so terrifying for an atheist.
Fifteen minutes into the movie with no sign of Eric going for the remote control, I starte
d to wonder if he was the one who changed his mind. I was completely at his mercy and that was driving me a bit insane. I mean, I’m a puzzle solver who looks for logical connections. Point A to B ending at Q. There was nothing logical about the situation I currently found myself in. I couldn’t demand that he turn it on and get this show on the road. I couldn’t turn it on myself, at least not without drawing a whole shit-ton of attention.
All I could do was wait him out and see what was going to happen.
Well, shit.
That meant I had no choice but to watch this stupid movie.
Currently on the screen was a young man, maybe in his twenties, his eyes fully black and his face covered in black veins as he walked around a school. The dialogue was sparse to this point, so there wasn’t much to concentrate on, but eventually I got into the atmosphere. The young man turned a corner and walked into a large, empty cafeteria. There was a group of students huddled in the corner crying and whimpering.
“No, Justin!” A girl stood, tears flowing down her face. “Don’t do this!”
I snorted.
“Ashley, get away!” Another tearful girl called out as idiot-Ashley approached the poor, possessed Justin.
“I can reach him. I just know I can. Justin, please. I know you’re in there, baby. Talk to me.”
One minute Ashley was standing in front of Justin and in the next Justin’s mouth opened to epic proportions and he bit her face off. I opened my mouth to laugh—because it really was the most ridiculous thing ever—but instead a startled scream escaped me.
Eric—the asshole—had chosen that moment to turn on the vibrator. He let it run for a moment before turning it off.
The guys behind us laughed and I couldn’t help but overhear the snide, scared the girl and girls are lame remarks. If Jasmine were here, she would have thrown her popcorn at them and probably her drink.
Me? I was too preoccupied wondering when Eric would turn the vibrator on again. He reached over and wrapped an arm around me, pulling me a bit closer to his side. Then he shifted so his mouth was close to my ear.
30 Nights Page 11