“You’re just confusing me now,” I complain.
She shrugs. “I’m just trying to help you think things through.”
I nod. “I know you are. I appreciate it.”
***
Days go by without Brayden and I feel like any energy I once had has gone, never to be seen again. I miss him so much it physically hurts. I’ve got aches and pains that I normally wouldn’t have. I pick up the phone all the time to call or text him but then I remember that I ruined our relationship and put my phone back down. Heartbroken all over again. He’s been calling every day and texting even more. I can’t answer, though I wonder what he’s doing. I wonder how he’s doing. It just feels so wrong not to know. I’ve never gone through a breakup before, but if they’re all like this, I never intend to date anybody ever again.
I walk through my front door after a long day of school and work. “I’m home!” I call out, dropping my bag by the steps as I walk toward the kitchen.
“Dinner smells goo—” I stop short, seeing a pair of eyes that I definitely didn’t expect to find at my dinner table. “What are you doing here?” I ask, shocked.
“Honey,” Mom begins, “Brayden’s going to be staying here for a couple of days.”
“Why?” My heart rate is picking up speed as I digest the information.
“To win you back,” Brayden tells me triumphantly.
“What?” I ask, breathless.
“Your parents are letting me stay here until you finally get this breakup thing out of your mind. I explained them what happened and they agree with me.,” he says, scooping a large helping of noodles into his mouth.
I shake my head. “It’s not something I can just get out of my mind. It’s done.”
“No,” he says simply.
“Brayden!” I say, annoyed.
“What?” he asks, looking at me with a curious look. It’s the same look I give to Zander when he’s telling me something I need to fake interest in.
I slouch down in my chair like a two-year-old and stare at my plate. “I’m not hungry anymore. I’m going upstairs to study,” I murmur before walking away.
Half an hour later there’s a knock at my door. Standing, I walk over to answer it. I’m not really surprised to find Brayden standing in front of me, leaning on the half wall that lets you gaze over and see downstairs. “What?” I ask, not sounding very friendly.
“Whatcha doing, Cutie?” he asks with innocent eyes.
I glare at him. “Nothing.”
“Really?” he asks, peering behind me to see my books. “Looks like you’re doing homework. Need any help with that?”
I shake my head, irritated. “No, I don’t. Especially not from you!” I sound like a petulant child and it only gets worse when Brayden starts giving me the grin that made me fall in love with him in the first place. The one that means he thinks I’m being adorable. “I know that I don’t really have any experience with it, but this isn’t how a breakup works, Brayden. We broke up.”
“Actually, you broke up with me. It’s a little different,” he clarifies.
I send him a small glare before closing the door on his face. I can’t believe my parents agreed to this madness.
It’s a restless night as I toss and turn, wondering what Brayden’s doing right now. He ended up rooming with Matt, so I’m sure there was a snoring contest going on all night. In the morning I wake up for a shower and open my door to see Brayden walking out of the bathroom. He’s glistening and only has a towel around his waist. “Oh god,” I groan, physically unable to take my eyes off his body as he slowly walks over to me.
“What’s the matter, Baby?” he asks, his voice deep and as smooth as butter. Jesus, he’s trying to seduce me! It’s working. I swallow and lick my lips before shaking my head. “Nothing much. You?” My voice sounds tight and slightly high pitched and I don’t even realize that my response doesn’t make sense.
A sexy grin crosses his lips as he steps even closer, standing between my legs and pressing me against the half wall. “Are you sure nothing’s up?” he asks seductively, his lips a whisper against my neck.
I gulp and shudder when he starts nibbling on my collarbone, his hands gripping my hips to keep me from moving. He moves to the other side and I blink a couple of times, remembering that we were talking. “W-what?” I ask, confused.
He chuckles and slowly starts moving his hands up my body before trailing them back down again. “I asked if something was wrong,” he repeats.
“No, nothing,” I gasp, squeezing my eyes closed.
“Are you sure? Because the last time I checked we weren’t together anymore.” As he says “together,” his teeth nip at my earlobe. “And that seems wrong to me . . .”
“Brayden,” I can’t help but whimper. It’s like my body doesn’t belong to me.
“What, Baby girl?” he whispers, his breath fanning across my cheek and giving me goosebumps.
“Don’t make me say it,” I beg. He knows what I mean and he knows what I want.
“Say what?” he asks knowingly, one hand going higher and pushing against my breast. Since I just woke up, I’m still in my pajamas and without a bra. He must have known that.
I sigh reluctantly and push my breast toward his hungry touches, wrapping my arms around his neck. “That I’m an idiot. I need you and you know I do. Please, I’m sorry,” I whisper, feeling embarrassed that I put us through all of this only to cave under my raging hormones.
“Do you mean it?” he asks me more seriously, though my body is still melting into his hands.
I squeeze my eyes shut to focus before pulling his hands from my body and holding them in mine. When I open my eyes, I stare into his. “I love you, and I’m so sorry. I’ve been miserable without you and I thought I was doing it for you but lately I’ve been realizing that it’s not for you, it was for me. But I don’t want to be without you. I’m dumb and I love you.”
He groans and yanks me against his body as he smashes his lips down on mine. I press myself against him, needing to feel him. “I’m so sorry,” I whisper against his lips.
“Shh,” he whispers back, slipping his hands under my shirt and moving so I walk backward into my room. He pauses a moment to kick the door closed and to lock it.
“I really am, though,” I say, lifting my arms as he peels off my shirt.
“Anna, I forgive you. If I thought this breakup was real, I wouldn’t be here.” He moans as I move my nails up and down the front of his chest.
I pause. “If you didn’t think it was real, what took you so long to burst in here?” I ask, looking up into his eyes.
He cups my cheek and places a soft kiss on my nose, “You needed time to think. I did too. I can live without you, Annie, but I don’t want to,” he whispers, resting his forehead against mine.
“Good,” I sigh, “because I need you in my life. I can’t say I’ll be any different than before, but I promise I’ll never break up with you again.”
After that, we abandon words and devour each other.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Epilogue (Six Years Later)
“Hi, sweet girl,” I coo at the little baby girl in my arms as she wakes up from the too-short nap she’d just taken. She opens her blue eyes and I smile as I look into them. She got them from me. Well, my side of the family, anyway. Her hair is all her daddy’s, though. Dark brown and getting thicker by the day.
Brinley Noelle Carter was born two weeks ago on one of the happiest days of my life. I continue talking to her as I walk us over to the couch to change her. The front door bangs open and I turn my head to see our son, Aiden, struggling to carry his little sister inside. “Mama, Haddy cryin’,” he says, lisping in the cutest way.
Aiden Paul was such a surprise to us. We’d just gotten back from our honeymoon in Hawaii when I found out I was pregnant. He looks exactly like his father with dark, curly brown hair and wide, brown eyes. He’s even got his devilish grin that pretty much has me wrapped around his finger,
and the cunning little three-year-old knows it.
Hadley Erin, my little daddy’s girl, takes after me. She’s still pretty bald at the moment, but everybody on my side takes a while to grow their hair in. The few wisps she does have are very blonde, and her eyes are bright blue. She’s eleven months old now and her brother’s best friend. There’s nowhere that Hadley goes that Aiden doesn’t follow. He’s going to be such a pain in her butt when they’re older.
Hadley was only two months old when we found out I was pregnant again. To say that we were shocked would be an understatement. Brayden and I never expected for me to get pregnant again so soon, but Brin is such a gift.
“What happened, Baby?” I ask, holding out my arms for my older daughter. Aiden half drags, half carries her to me so that I can hold her. There’s a small scratch on her fist, which I kiss, making her giggle despite the large crocodile tears in her eyes.
“Thanks for bringing her to me, Aid. You’re such a great big brother,” I tell my son proudly, leaning over to kiss his head. A huge smile takes over his face as he clearly takes pride in this. “Where’s your daddy?” I ask him, carefully standing with both daughters in my arms.
“Daddy outside. He fixin’ a car!” Aiden tells me excitedly. If he’s not watching over Hadley like a hawk, he’s with his daddy working on cars. He can’t do much, but we pretend he’s a genius mechanic.
“Wanna open the door for me, Bud?” I ask, watching as he runs forward. Aiden loves being a helper. I think it has something to do with him being a big brother and feeling like he should be protective. He does his best helping me with groceries and taking care of Hadley, and he adores Brinley. Thankfully, he remembers how fragile Hadley was at Brin’s age, and doesn’t get too rough with her.
“Daddy, Daddy, Daddy!” Aiden screams as he runs up to his father. Brayden spins around quickly, dropping whatever tools he was working with to pick Aiden up and spin him around. Aiden’s high-pitched giggles put a large grin on my face. There’s nothing better than watching my husband and son together.
“Brayden, his shirt!” I exclaim, despite my joy in seeing them play.
He looks down to see the black grease prints now on our son’s shirt and sends me a sheepish grin. “Nothing you can’t fix.”
I raise an eyebrow. “I’m a mom, not a magician,” I say, walking to stand right in front of him. Brayden puts Aiden on the ground with a gentle command to go play before bending down to kiss me lightly on the lips. “Sorry, Mrs. Carter.” I grin and shake my head. In the past four years, he’s never gotten tired of calling me that.
“You know, the only reason I let the kids be outside without me is because you’re there to prevent them from getting hurt,” I tell him teasingly before turning to Hadley. “Show Daddy your hand, Baby.”
She puts on a theatrical pout and holds the offended hand out for her Daddy to see. “Aw, Princess,” Brayden coos before scooping her up and kissing her hand a billion times. Hadley not only has Aiden wrapped around her finger, but Brayden too. She was his first baby girl and they have the sweetest relationship. She refuses to go to sleep if Brayden hasn’t sung her a lullaby, which is crazy since Brayden doesn’t exactly have a singing voice. More a drowning walrus gurgle.
I grin at how cute they are before lifting Brin higher in my arms to kiss her forehead. “And how’s my other princess?” Brayden asks, leaning down to place some kisses on her cheek.
“She just woke up from a nap, so we’ve got at least an hour of happy time,” I inform him. Brin is definitely a baby who needs regular naps and sleep. She goes completely mad without them.
“Mama!” Aiden calls. I turn and see he’s standing way too close to the road for my comfort.
“Aiden!” I yell, panicking a little bit.
Brayden chuckles and kisses my shoulder before running forward and sweeping a laughing Aiden into his arms. A truck pulls up in front of them and I realize what Aiden was trying to say. No matter where we are, he always recognizes Uncle Landon’s truck.
I watch as Evie and Landon hop out and head to the back doors. Evie steps back carrying two-year-old Ivy while Landon comes around the truck with Ivy’s twin brother, Zach. After the accident, they began the adoption process almost immediately and a few years later, they got two beautiful Brazilian siblings.
Behind them, a nine-year-old Zander jumps from the car, followed by a six-year-old Nora. They’ve both grown so much, it’s crazy. Nora’s once blonde hair and blue eyes now match the rest of her family’s dark brown wavy hair and light brown eyes. Zander is the spitting image of his father and uncle, and acts just like them. Evie has had to sit down with both father and son numerous times to talk about their language issues.
“Hola, Chica!” Evie calls, waving to me. I grin and wave back before leading us into the house.
Right by the front door is my favorite picture from the wedding. I remember it as if it were yesterday.
I’d been planning basically nonstop for the past year and had made sure everything was perfect. Our colors were ivory and plum, our cake was just the right size, we only invited people we actually wanted there, and it was perfect. That part was scary, but all in all it went amazingly well.
I remember standing in the center of the bridal room, looking around as everybody hustled to get ready. Ro, my maid of honor, had recently dyed her hair bright red and it clashed horribly with the dress in a way that only she would be able to somehow make sexy. Lena and Evie were my other bridesmaids, with Nora as my flower girl. They all wore plum-colored dresses with ivory sashes around the middle. I chose that so it to be the opposite of my dress, which was ivory with a plum slash.
Brayden must really have loved me since, despite his protests, he accepted the white tux like a gentleman. The groomsmen—Landon as his best man, and Carlos and Matty—all got black suits. Zander was our ring bearer and was honored to have such responsibility.
The girls all kissed me on the cheek one last time before heading to where we’d all walk down the aisle. I stayed behind, wanting one last minute of peace before everything got crazy. Before I knew it, Dad was knocking on the door. “You ready, Banana?” he asked through the locked door. I shook my head. “Anna?” he asked when he didn’t hear a response.
“I need a minute!” I choked back, feeling my heartbeat pick up speed.
“Uh, Honey . . . we don’t really have a minute,” he said, clearly worried.
“Well I need one,” I told him as I began pacing, lifting my dress so I wouldn’t trip on it. When the bridal march began, I released a muffled yelp.
“Anna, you okay in there?” Dad asked.
Tears welled up in my eyes as I began to rant, “I can’t do this! I can’t do this. I’m twenty! I’m only twenty years old and I’m getting married! What the hell was I thinking? Couldn’t we just wait a couple of years or something? I mean, why now? Why do I have to get married so young? Brayden wouldn’t mind, would he? Oh, of course he would!” I threw my hands in the air.
“I’ll be back in a minute,” Dad said, sounding uncomfortable as he cleared his throat. I continued to pace as I heard his footsteps walk away. I didn’t know it at the time, but Dad was going to get Brayden.
All of our guests were waiting with confused looks as Dad quickly walked down the aisle alone. He whispered something in Brayden’s ear, which caused Brayden to start jogging down the aisle, waving for people to stay seated. “Just a second, folks. We’ll be back in a minute.”
I heard a soft knock on the door at the same time as somebody tried to turn the knob. “Anna, open up. It’s me, Baby,” Brayden said.
“No. I’m fine. I’ll just be a minute,” I said.
“Anna, seriously, open the door,” he demanded, making me scowl.
“You can’t see me in my dress. It’s bad luck,” I told him.
I could hear his snort. “I’m pretty sure that any bad luck started the second you decided to have a panic attack in your dressing room.”
I glared at him throu
gh the door, even though he’d made a completely valid point. “Now, open the door,” he demanded again in a final tone.
I sighed and moved forward, flicking the lock. He waited for me to step back before walking in and closing the door. I felt a little better when he paused a moment to take in the sight of me in my gown. It was an A-line style with a plum ribbon tied around the waist with a white flower attached to it. Under the ribbon, the fabric pulled toward the flower, creating a ripple across the skirt. There was a small train that touched about two feet of ground. “You look so beautiful,” he told me sincerely, staring deeply into my eyes.
“I’m so sorry,” I told him earnestly as I began pacing again. “I didn’t want to freak out today. I want to marry you, but it’s marriage, Brayden. Like forever and ever and what if you get sick of me?”
Cupping my cheeks in his hands, he effectively stopped my pacing as he kissed my nose. “Anna Danielle Holden, I’ve known you for years now. I’m pretty sure that if I was going to get sick of you, it would’ve been when you wrecked my truck.”
I bit my lip at the memory. His poor truck. I was driving on the dirt road to get to my house and lost traction, making it flip multiple times before being stopped by a large tree.
When Brayden got to the hospital and found me crying, he instantly assumed that it was because I was hurt. Which I was, with a concussion and two broken ribs and a fractured arm, but I was actually crying about his demolished truck. He explained that as long as I was safe, he didn’t care about the vehicle. But I still feel bad about that. “I’m so sorry!” I exclaimed. I apologize every time it’s brought up.
“Anna, that’s not the problem here,” he told me softly. “I love you more than you will ever know. You mean everything to me. But if you don’t want to marry me, you need to tell me now. Because, like you said, this is forever. So if we’re like fifty and you get sick of me, you’re just going to have to deal and spoon feed me anyway.”
I looked into his playful eyes and all of my fears drifted away. This was Brayden. The guy I loved with all of my heart. Why the hell was I being such a baby about it? Ever since our fight that Valentine’s Day, I’d been working so hard on being a better girlfriend. Unfortunately, some days were harder than others, and it sucked that our wedding day had to be one of them.
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