by Drew Hunt
“Babe.”
“I know,” David said, refusing to allow himself to cry again.
“I’ll be back as soon as I can. And even before that, I’m sure I’ll still get to see you every now and again.”
“I know. It won’t be the same, though. I’ve been spoiled, being able to love you anytime I’ve wanted.”
Bud pried David’s arms from him, and got off the bed. Beginning to dress, he said, “Please, stay here in the bedroom. I want to say goodbye to you here.”
“Okay.”
After putting on his shoes, Bud went to the dresser and emptied his clothes into a couple of suitcases. David had to look away, watching his lover pack was much too painful.
Sensing Bud approaching the bed again, David turned his head to see Bud looking down at him, a small box in his hand.
“I want you to have this.”
“What is it?”
“Open it,” Bud encouraged.
David did so and gasped. “Your Purple Heart. You sure?” With trembling fingers, David touched the medal.
“You already have my heart. This is just a promise that I’ll return as soon as I can.”
Bud walked silently to the door. He paused, but didn’t turn round.
David watched his man, his Marine, his main reason for living, walk out of the door and slowly close it behind him. He heard the small click as the catch re-engaged, the sound of Bud walking down the hallway, and a few moments later the front door opening and then closing.
Reaching for Bud’s pillow, David curled himself into a ball and wept.
Chapter 10
“It’s not fair, it’s so not fucking fair,” David shouted before collapsing to the carpet.
Corey and Peter picked their friend up and took him back to the bedroom. Peter called a doctor friend of his, who made a house call to give David a shot to sedate him.
Waking the next morning, his head fuzzy with sleep and confusing images of the previous day, David sat up in bed.
“So, you decided to rejoin the land of the living.”
“Huh?” David looked for the source of the voice, and spotted Corey sitting on a chair in the corner.
“You slept for twelve hours straight.”
“It may have been twelve hours,” David yawned, “But I dispute the straight part.”
Corey smiled. “How you feeling?”
“Uh, like someone stuffed my head with cotton.”
“Yeah, the doctor said you might feel like that for a while.”
“What am I gonna do, Corey? It was me who told Bud he had to go. Go back to that bitch, and …” David felt the onset of tears.
“I know, he called me at Pete’s.” Corey went on to explain that after Bud had spoken with Lisa, he’d called Corey to ask if he could come over to be with David.
“Even at a time like that, he was still looking out for me. Oh, God, I love him so much. Corey, I don’t know how I’m gonna cope without him.”
“I know, love. But hard as it seems at the moment, you just gotta pull yourself together, take one day at a time and wait until you and Bud can be back together again.”
* * * *
To David’s surprise, he did manage to pull himself together. The daily grind of the new school semester helped him put some direction back into his life. Though at times, especially when he was alone, he felt himself drifting, his mind going places he didn’t want it to go.
The school was gearing up for winter break. The staff and students had decorated the school and were marking the season in non-religious ways, as the local board of education dictated. The holiday tree was decked out with holiday lights, children sang songs which made no reference to God or the baby Jesus. Corey complained that it was political correctness gone mad, but all David could think about was that he would most likely be spending Christmas alone.
From the few occasions David had spoken with Bud on the telephone, he got the impression that his Marine wasn’t making much progress in getting him and David back together. At times David wondered if Bud had forgotten his promise.
Once, when David actually got to spend a couple hours face to face time with his man, Bud told him he’d managed to rent a furnished apartment in a fairly nice neighborhood. During the visit, which was much too short for David’s liking, Bud did say how much he loved and was missing him, which gave the older man some hope they would eventually be reunited. Every time Bud talked about Adam, his eyes would light up and a smile would appear on his face. David had been correct in his assumption that Bud would make an excellent father. Though the thought of the huge Marine changing diapers, bottle feeding, and burping a newborn baby was something David had a hard time imagining.
On the rare occasion Lisa’s name was mentioned, Bud was stoic, though he was anxious to point out to David he always slept in Adam’s room, and never with her.
* * * *
David happened to check his cell phone one lunchtime and noticed a text had come in from Bud. Opening the message, David read,
Can you meet me at the pizza parlor in the shopping mall after school?
Puzzled, and a little anxious, David replied that he would be there.
All through classes that afternoon, which seemed to go on forever, David wondered at Bud’s message. Did he want to make their separation official? Was he going to try and make a go of living with Lisa, for Adam’s sake? Though a small part of him hoped Bud would have good news, David’s natural pessimism drowned out such possibilities.
The bell signaling the end of school finally sounded. Seeing out the last of his student’s, David made his way along the empty hallways and out to the staff parking lot. Part of him didn’t ever want to arrive at the shopping mall. The uncertainty of not knowing what was going to happen was in some ways preferable to being in possession of the facts. Especially if those facts were unpleasant.
Finding a space close to a side entrance of the mall, David sat in his car for a few moments trying to regain his composure. Realizing he couldn’t put off the inevitable any longer, he got out of his Camry, locked it, and walked into the mall.
It was easy to spot Bud’s large, imposing frame amid the other diners. Though once he got closer, David could see Bud wasn’t alone. Next to him was a baby stroller. Its occupant was a perfect miniature of Bud, even down to the piercing eyes that regarded David in a wary but not unfriendly manner.
Noticing his child was staring at something, Bud turned to see what it was. “David, thanks for agreeing to come.” Bud sounded friendly, but there was a certain lack of confidence in the voice, which put David on edge. “This is my son, Adam, by the way. Adam, say hello to Uncle David.”
Of course the child didn’t verbally respond, but his face broke into a wide toothless smile, which melted David’s heart.
“Hello, Adam. It’s great to meet you,” David said, giving the child a smile and a wave.
“Um, unless you’re hungry, could we go and find somewhere a little more private to talk?”
“Uh, yeah, sure.”
Bud stood up and expertly maneuvered the stroller through the maze of tables, chairs, shopping bags and the like. The two adults walked alongside one another, both sticking to safe, polite and inconsequential topics. Meanwhile David was beginning to grow concerned at how Bud was acting.
“This is about as alone as we’re likely to get,” Bud said, stopping outside an empty store front.
“Okay.”
Bud’s face changed expression several times before settling on mild concern. “I’ve been practicing all day how to say this, and I still don’t think I’ve got it right. I’ve left Lisa. She never really was interested in getting back with me, I don’t think. All she wanted was a way out of the shitty apartment she was living in. But because she doesn’t have much money, or any references, she wasn’t able to get anywhere better. Which was where I came in.”
“I see.” David wasn’t sure he did, but felt the need to say something.
“So, because of me
being in the Marines, I was able to rent a furnished apartment and get a good deal on the rent. Lisa also wanted someone to look after Adam here. I think if it came to it, she would have given him up, but because I was there, she didn’t have to.”
“Um, because I refused to sleep with her, there was no way I could—not after all the shit she’s pulled—she started bringing men home. Most of them were total assholes, and I’d kick them out. Lisa would shout and scream at me for doing it, but I think deep down she appreciated that I was looking out for her. Well, eventually she found a decent guy, I knew it was only a matter of time before she would. In fact, I was sort of counting on it. Though it took a bit longer than I’d hoped.”
“Yeah, I remember you said you had some kind of a plan. Was that it?”
Bud nodded. “The upshot is that Lisa wants to make a fresh start with this new guy. Despite all that Lisa has done to me, to us, I still care about her.”
“That’s very admirable,” David said, knowing he could never be as charitable to the calculating bitch.
“Well, although Jerome, that’s the guy’s name by the way, said he would help take care of Adam, I wasn’t gonna have no other man raising my kid. So I had to persuade Lisa to let me have him. At first she wasn’t gonna play ball, but I managed to get Jerome to see things my way. So, between the both of us, we managed to get Lisa to agree to let me have Adam.
“Before she could change her mind again, I hired a lawyer. He drew up some papers that say Lisa has agreed to give up all parental rights to Adam, and transfer them to me. We saw the family judge this morning, and she made it all legal.”
“Wow, you have been busy.”
“Yeah.” Bud looked down at the baby in the stroller. “He’s all mine, and I even had blood tests done to prove it.”
“You have been thorough.”
“Yeah, nobody’s gonna take my kid away from me again. I came back from the courthouse, packed up all of Adam’s and my stuff, and came here.” Letting out a long breath, Bud continued. “So I’m free of all my obligations to Lisa, but I’ve now got ones to Adam.” Bud looked David in the eye momentarily before lowering his gaze again. “I want to come home and live with you, but,” he pointed to Adam, “it wouldn’t be fair to you, because—”
Finally the penny dropped. Bud was afraid David wouldn’t want to take Adam on as well. Why on earth would Bud think that? Hadn’t the man known how much he wanted to adopt a child and raise it with Bud? Then David remembered he’d never had that conversation.
Lifting Bud’s chin and getting the younger man’s full attention, David almost shouted. “This is a fucking order, Marine, so listen up! You are going to haul both your and Adam’s asses out of this shopping mall and get yourselves over to my, no, our house on the fucking double! Do you understand what I’m saying, Marine?”
“Sir, yes, sir!” Bud saluted.
Adam sat in his stroller clapping his hands, watching as Bud let out an almighty whoop of joy before picking David up and swinging him around.
Epilogue
“Daddy Davy, will Santie come visit tonight?”
“No, sweetheart,” David said, ruffling the four-year-old’s hair. “That won’t be for another week.”
“Aww, but I been a good boy, so I thought he might come early.”
Hunkering down to Adam’s level, Bud said, “Sorry, lil guy, even though you’ve been the bestest little boy in the whole wide world, you still gotta wait until Christmas Day to open your presents.”
“Tell you what,” David said. “See this?” He pointed to the advent calendar on the wall.
Adam nodded.
“Remember how we’ve been opening up one of these little doors every morning before you go to pre-school?”
“Yeah?” Adam asked suspiciously.
“Well, when we open the final door, that’ll be Santa’s signal that it’s Christmas Day, and he can come down the chimney and fill your stocking.”
“Uh huh,” Adam yawned. David could see the wheels turning in his son’s sleepy head.
“I think it’s time a certain little boy was in bed, don’t you?” David said.
“Aww, can I stay up, please?”
“Okay, just ten more minutes. You want to watch some TV?” Bud asked.
“Superman!”
“Why am I not surprised?” David said, finding the correct DVD amongst the many Adam had amassed.
“‘Cause he’s like my daddy Bud. Big and strong and brave.”
“He sure is.” Looking over at Bud, David saw his man grimace with embarrassment.
Within the prescribed ten minutes, Adam was fast asleep on the sofa. Bud picked his son up and carried him to bed.
On his return, Bud sat next to David on the loveseat. Evenings, after Adam had been put to bed, were always David’s favorite time of day. They could make out and show their love for each other without having to face a barrage of embarrassing questions from an increasingly inquisitive little boy.
“This Christmas is going to be the best ever,” Bud said. “He’s a lot more aware of things this year.”
“Uh huh,” David said, distracted because Bud had started to lick the inside of David’s ear, an action which always turned David on.
“It was a great idea of yours to write a list for Santa, then have him watch as you held it above the fire. Even I was surprised the paper went up the chimney rather than burning up.”
“Just basic science,” David said, “But I agree it does look rather magical. It’s something my dad always used to do with my letters to Santa.”
Bud fell silent. He even stopped nuzzling at David’s neck.
“You thinking about the Christmases at the group homes?”
“Yeah. I’m gonna make sure our kid never has to experience what I had to go through. I remember one year I was so pumped that I actually got a present, even though it was badly wrapped. Though when I opened it, I saw the game was broken. No wonder the staff didn’t want it for their own kids.”
“Please don’t.” David turned and gave his man a comforting hug.
“Sorry. It still makes me mad that shit like that was allowed to happen, and for all I know still happens.”
“I think it’s wonderful that even though you’ve been out of the Corps for these past four years, you still try and make Christmas special for deprived kids.”
“The Corps always made a big effort for the Toys for Tots program. And I guess I still wanna make sure kids today don’t have to have the sort of Christmases I had.”
Kissing Bud on the lips, David said, “Adam’s right. You are a superhero.”
“No way. If I was, I wouldn’t have put you through—”
“Don’t go there. We’re together now. We’re a family, and nobody’s gonna do anything to mess that up.”
David felt Bud give him a squeeze.
“You’re so fucking special. When I think that I was gonna drive all the way to Gunny’s place in Eugene that night.” Bud shuddered.
“I know. Trust me, I know. It was fate that we both decided to stop over at the same motel.”
“Yeah.”
“Come on, we’ve had enough nostalgia for one evening. I’m gonna head to bed, where I’m hoping a sexy caped crusader is gonna make sweet and gentle love to me.”
“Oh, yeah? Not if I get to the bedroom before him he won’t.”
“Funny man.” David stood and held out his hand to Bud, who took it and got to his feet. “You’re the only superhero for me.”
“And it better stay that way, buster.”
Smiling, David stood on tip-toe and delivered a gentle kiss to Bud’s lips. “The bedroom?”
“The bedroom,” Bud replied, leading his man away.
THE END
Saving Ernest
It started out as your typical Saturday. I woke up a little after ten. I liked a lie-in at the weekend, and the heat wave we Londoners had been enjoying meant I hadn’t been able to get to sleep the previous night. I wouldn’t have
minded the heat as much if I’d had a man to snuggle up against, but as they say, “once bitten twice shy.” When I was sufficiently awake to coordinate my hand movements, I reached over and switched on my bedside radio.
The news bulletin covered a long and depressing litany of murders, the goings-on in Westminster, and two well-known figures in the public eye who had finally admitted having an extra-marital affair.
I decided to start my day. First job was to get out of bed and relieve my bladder, brush my teeth and perform all the other morning rituals.
I dressed in a loose-fitting pair of shorts and an oversized white T-shirt—I’d taken heed of the advice of the overly-cheerful weatherman, or to give him his politically correct title, weatherperson.
I knew I’d have to smarten up my attire to meet Laurence for lunch, but that wasn’t until one P.M.
The milk had gone off, so after making a note on the pad stuck to the fridge door to buy more, I settled for a glass of orange juice and a toasted bagel. That was breakfast. Mother, who was being dried out in yet another over-priced private clinic, would have been horrified at the meagreness of my morning repast.
A quick sift through my post—nothing but junk, a cable bill, and, joy of joys, I’d been selected for the Readers’ Digest prize draw, oh, be still my beating heart. Setting the cable bill to one side, the rest went straight into the now overflowing pedal bin. I added bin liners to the pad. A quick sniff at the cat’s litter tray, and I added cat litter to the list, too.
Looking up at the calendar confirmed it was the second Saturday of the month, and the history magazine I subscribed to should be waiting for me at the newsagents on the high street.
So, having little else to do, I put on a pair of sandals and schlepped my way down to Mr Hussein’s shop.
I thought I might as well get myself a copy of The Guardian while I was at it. I wasn’t a regular newspaper reader, but I thought as it was going to be so warm today, I’d erect my parasol in my postage stamp-sized back garden and sit in my padded folding chair.