by Kiera Silver
She nodded, too afraid to argue with him. There would be other children still in the facility, and there was no way she was going to put them at risk. It was bad enough that she was putting her own child at risk, but she couldn’t have just driven away as Armo’s captive and turned her back on her baby. Maybe he would have been better off in foster care rather than being raised in the mafia… but she couldn’t stand the thought of abandoning him.
She walked beside Armo with what she hoped was an air of calm, struggling to match the rapid pace he set. The skin of her wrist where he held her burned a little, and her fingers were starting to go numb, but she didn’t try to get him to loosen his hold.
They climbed the steps to the clapboard house that had been converted to a daycare center and stepped inside. It was a homey and cheerful place, and it had always given her a good vibe from the time she had interviewed the people about taking care of her son. She had been almost eight months pregnant at the time and restricted by a tight budget, so it had been a blessing to find a place where the staff seemed to genuinely care about the children in their care.
The director herself greeted them, coming from the playroom rather than her office. In the three months Katie had brought her son there, she didn’t recall ever seeing Lorraine in the office. The owner was hands-on with the kids, just like the other workers.
Now, the middle-aged woman flashed her a big smile, then her eyes darted curiously to Armo. “There you are. I was getting a little concerned.”
She strove for a normal tone. “Some rocker-type wrecked a suite last night, so I was one of the lucky ones who got stuck staying late to clean it.” And the hotel took advantage of the fact that she was an illegal worker by not paying extra or overtime for such deeds. She was often picked for that kind of work, along with the other women she suspected were working without legal identification.
Lorraine nodded sympathetically. “I’m glad to see you. We’re closing up soon.” She left the rest unspoken, apparently not feeling the need to remind Katie that tardy pickups led to additional expense and eventual notification to social services to come and pick up the child.
“I’m sorry about that.”
“Well, you know where Lucas is, so I’ll leave you to fetch him. We’re shorthanded today, and there’s always something to do around here.” With one more curious glance cast in Armo’s direction, Lorraine disappeared back into the playroom, leaving them alone.
Armo had stiffened as soon as she said Lucas’ name, and now he glared down at her ferociously. “His name is Lucas?”
She nodded reluctantly, having given in to sentiment during the throes of labor and named her son after the middle name of his father. She wanted him to have a tentative connection with Armo, though at the time she’d assumed neither would ever know of the other’s existence. It had seemed like the safest course to protect her child, though she had hated not being able to share his birth with Armo.
“Show me where my son is.”
She shivered at the intensity of possessiveness in his tone, her heart sinking as nausea churned in her stomach. Armo still didn’t release his hold on her wrist, but he loosened it slightly to allow her to lead the way to the baby room. As they stepped inside, her gaze immediately focused on Lucas, though there were three other infants also still waiting for pickup.
She went straight to him, surprised when Armo released his hold on her as she neared the crib where Lucas was napping. She bent over and picked him up, cuddling him against her before pressing a kiss to his forehead as she enjoyed the feel and scent of her baby against her. How she hated leaving him, especially for long hours every day.
That probably wouldn’t be a concern any longer, unless Armo permanently removed her from his life. The thought sent a pang of fear through her, and she inadvertently tightened her arms to the point where Lucas squawked in protest as his eyes opened.
Armo drew in a deep breath. “My eyes.”
She nodded, not bothering to argue. She couldn’t anyway. Most babies were born with blue eyes, but Lucas’ had been that whiskey-brown shade right from the start, fringed by thick eyelashes, and accompanied by a robust head of black hair. He looked like a Moretti, and there was no point in trying to pretend otherwise.
“Let’s go.”
She shook her head, holding the baby tightly.
“Don’t even try to push me on this, Katie. I’m so angry at you right now…” He trailed off, seeming to be beyond able to express the depths of his anger.
She glared at him, feeling a surge of spirit return. “Don’t pretend like this all falls on me, Armo. If you’d been honest with me about who and what you were, there never would have been a baby to start with. I wouldn’t have gotten involved with you.”
His glower was even fiercer than hers. “You think I don’t know that? Why do you think I never told you? You’re one of those people who sees the world in strictly black and white, good or bad, and you have no room for compromise. Well, you’re damn well going to compromise now, so get your ass in the car.”
“I can’t leave without his car seat and bottles.” She shook her head. “You can’t drive around in an SUV with a baby in your arms.”
He sighed impatiently. “Is the car seat in that wreck on wheels you were getting into?”
She shook her head. “Just the base. The seat is over in the corner, the black and gray one.” She nodded in the direction of where four infant car seats were lined up against a shelf. Lucas’ was the plainest of the bunch, purchased at a big-box store and without some of the fancier features.
“Can it be used without the base?” As he asked the question, he strode to the car seat, his gaze never wavering from her. Perhaps he expected her to try to make a run for it. She might have attempted it, except she knew he had two goons with him in the SUV, and likely a whole contingent somewhere nearby. Trying to escape right now was futile. “Yes,” she snapped, giving no further answer or information.
He returned with the car seat a second later, placing it on a table nearby. “Now what?”
She didn’t respond as she laid Lucas in the car seat and began fastening the straps and adjusting the buckle. When she was satisfied with the fit, she nodded and clicked the handle into the carry position.
When she started to reach for it, Armo’s hand reached it first. “I’ll carry my son.”
She nodded, a little surprised when he didn’t take her wrist this time. Apparently, Armo had realized that as long as he had Lucas, he had her full compliance. She wasn’t going to try to run away and leave her son behind. She’d made a lot of mistakes, but that wasn’t one she could even bear to contemplate.
They left the center without speaking to each other, though Armo paused in the playroom and waved in Lorraine’s direction. “Lucas won’t be returning,” he said firmly before turning away, allowing Lorraine no time to ask questions, or give Katie a chance to protest his decree. A few moments later, they were in the SUV, with Lucas’ car seat strapped in, and the baby between them.
Armo couldn’t seem to look away from the baby, who had gone back to sleep once he was settled in his seat. His fingers rested lightly on Lucas’ abdomen, though he occasionally stroked his thumb down the baby’s rounded cheek. There was tenderness in his gaze that disappeared every time he looked up from the baby and in her direction. Rage burned then, along with something else. It was difficult to identify, but she tentatively labeled it as pain. She had clearly hurt him by keeping the baby from him.
But what other choice had been left to her? He lived a dangerous life, and he was a dangerous man. She couldn’t just turn a blind eye to that or let Lucas be raised in such an environment.
Now, all of her choices were gone, and she would have to do what Armo wanted, unless an opportunity to escape presented itself. Considering he knew about their son now, and he knew she had witnessed him shooting Agent Parsing, she didn’t imagine she would ever get that chance.
It was far more likely he would lock her away,
and if she were lucky, she might get to see Lucas upon occasion. The thought sent a sharp pang through her chest and brought tears to her eyes. She looked away from Armo and Lucas, staring at the road as the SUV carried them inexorably down the freeway, back to the seat of Moretti power.
She turned to glance in Armo’s direction when she heard him start to speak.
“Sophia, I need a huge favor. I need you to set up a makeshift nursery at the condo. Get whatever stuff babies need.” He was silent for a moment. “I don’t know what they fucking need, Sophia. He’s three months old, so figure it out. Thank you.” He hung up after another minute during which his sister was clearly speaking to him.
She wanted to ask what Sophia had said, or perhaps offer some suggestions, but she kept quiet. Armo wouldn’t care what she said, and he wouldn’t want her input. For a swoon-worthy moment, she imagined what it would be like to be Sophia in the baby store, shopping with an unlimited budget.
The thrill faded quickly as she realized the price that went along with that option, which was accepting the Moretti’s’ criminal activity. That was something she had vowed not to do when she had fled, but now all her resolutions didn’t mean anything in the face of Armo’s anger and his clear determination to keep Lucas.
They didn’t speak for more than an hour, and she grew progressively more uncomfortable, having gone far beyond the pumping session during her afternoon break. Her breasts were painful and swollen. She looked at Lucas, who was still sleeping, and bit her lip. She didn’t even have her breast pump here, or she could pump to relieve a little of the pressure and wait for Lucas to wake up to nurse.
Since he was still sleeping, he must have just had a bottle shortly before they arrived to pick him up. He should be waking soon though, since three to four hours was the most he’d ever slept without nursing.
Finally, as she could feel the telltale leaking of milk from her breasts that indicated she was about to flood herself, she bit her lip and swallowed her pride. “I need to stop somewhere.”
Armo didn’t even look up from his phone, which he had left out after speaking with his sister. “No. I’m not giving you a chance to run away under the pretense of going to the bathroom.”
She gritted her teeth. “It doesn’t have to be a bathroom. I just need somewhere with a little bit of privacy. I’m… I’m leaking.” She blushed as she said the words.
Now he did look up from his phone, his expression bewildered. “What does that mean?”
She glanced down at her chest, and then let out a heavy sigh of exasperation when he still didn’t get it. “I need to nurse Lucas, okay?”
He still looked skeptical as he glanced down at the sleeping baby. “Lucas is asleep, and you grabbed bottles from the fridge at the daycare center. Try another excuse, Katie.”
She let out an even longer sigh. “You’re such a jackass, Armo. Why didn’t I see that before?”
He quirked a brow, seemingly unbothered by their captive audience in the front seat. “You’re really going to call me names when you’re the one who ran away and kept my son a secret?”
She bit her lip and turned away from him, determined not to make another request, though she could feel milk trickling from her swollen breasts. She crossed her arms lightly over her chest to hide the fact as the minutes passed, and the nursing pads stopped absorbing the excess milk. It was now trailing down her stomach, and she pressed her shirt against her abdomen in an attempt to soak up some of the mess. She was miserable, and she prayed Lucas would wake up soon, because that was like the only way Armo was going to stop and allow her to get any relief.
The pressure was increasing, and tears swam in her eyes as she tried to ignore the discomfort of her overly full breasts. It was a relief when she heard Lucas stirring a few minutes later, and she looked back at him. “Can we pull over now? He’s going to be waking up and needs to eat.”
Still appearing skeptical, Armo didn’t quite look at her, but he instructed the driver to pull off at the next opportunity. There was an exit two miles away, and she was barely fighting back tears by the time they pulled into the parking lot of a truck stop.
“Where are the bottles and formula?”
She glared at Armo as she let her arms fall away to reveal her wet front. “Right here.”
She was vaguely aware of the two men in the front getting out of the vehicle, and she was thankful for their discretion as she fumbled with the seatbelts and removed Lucas from the car seat. He was starting to wake up now, and he grunted frantically as she lifted up her wet T-shirt and unhooked her soaked nursing bra, allowing the baby to latch on to her nipple. It was a relief to feel the pressure subside, and she knew she’d soon have to switch him to the other breast to get similar relief.
It was only after she had done so a few minutes later that she gave any thought to Armo in the car with them. She looked up, startled to see his gaze on them, eyes full of wonder, and perhaps something she didn’t want to identify as lust. Abruptly, she realized her other breast was still exposed and tried to cover it the best she could with her sodden T-shirt.
“I’m sorry,” said Armo in a soft voice.
She blinked. “You are? For what?”
“I didn’t believe you were nursing him, and I apologize. You were clearly uncomfortable, and it wasn’t my intention to cause you pain.”
She could have snorted or refused the apology, but she just shrugged it off. It was unexpected, but she didn’t feel like getting into a deep, heartfelt conversation at the moment about the pain they had caused each other. Instead, she asked, “Do you have a shirt or something I can borrow?”
He nodded. “I’ll find something.” With that, he exited his side of the SUV and went around to the back, and the trunk opened a moment later. She didn’t glance in his direction or look behind her to see what he was doing as she finished feeding Lucas. She burped him and then just held him for a moment before her door opened, and she had to cover her exposed breasts as best she could.
Armo thrust in a gray undershirt at her, and she took it awkwardly. She was trying to figure out how to change her shirt while holding Lucas when Armo solved the problem by reaching over and taking the baby from her arms. She bit her lip as a whirlwind of feelings swept through her.
There was a touch of jealousy at the way Armo cradled Lucas in his arms, and the baby didn’t even protest being held by someone new. There was also a strong surge of tenderness at the sight of her son in his father’s arms, which was as it should be under normal circumstances. There was also fear when she recognized the bond forming between them practically in front of her eyes.
She tried to tell herself it was good that Armo would take care of Lucas, especially since she didn’t know what he had planned for her, but she feared losing her son. She couldn’t imagine a worse fate than being ripped from him and shoved into some dark corner to slowly disappear. It would be better for Armo to kill her outright than put her through that. She had a feeling he was going to torture her for her perceived betrayals, and she feared what was coming next.
He was bound to realize he had the perfect weapon to wield against her in the form of the infant in his arms. Once upon a time, she would have been certain he’d never stoop so low as to use a harmless baby is such a way, but that was before she’d seen him shoot Agent Parsing and learned what he did for a living. Would he understand that making her suffer by removing Lucas from her care would also make Lucas suffer? Would he even care?
Chapter Five
Armo stared down in awe at his son, feeling a fierce tug toward the little one. It had been difficult not to look at him or touch him during the drive, and now that he was holding his son for the first time, he knew he was smitten with the little man. He could only imagine how much more he would grow to love Lucas in the coming days, since he already felt protective and paternal toward him.
He’d already lost three months of his son’s life, and rage swelled in him. He had to force himself to turn away from Katie, ostensibl
y under the guise of giving her a chance to change her T-shirt. In that moment, he could have dragged her from the SUV and left her at the truck stop without a flicker of remorse.
As Lucas stretched in his arms, the feeling flickered and faded away. He wouldn’t even have the baby if it hadn’t been for Katie bringing him into the world. He didn’t know the circumstances, but he knew she could have aborted the baby just as easily as giving birth, so he owed her something. She had also kept her mouth shut, which had kept him out of prison, but he was having a difficult time feeling any gratitude for the woman who had ripped his child from him and turned his life upside down for the last eleven months.
He turned back as soon as he had his anger under control, finding her wearing his T-shirt, which was unexpectedly erotic. It briefly reminded him of the times she would slip on his discarded shirts in the mornings and pad around the house, making him breakfast on Gretchen’s days off. Those mornings had usually ended up turning into the rest of the day spent in bed, and his cock stirred to life even as his anger surged again.
She had spent the last eleven months torturing him from afar, and all because he had protected her while taking care of family business. “Did you know you were pregnant when you ran away?”
Her blue eyes widened, and she seemed reluctant to answer, but she finally nodded. His breath hissed between his teeth, and if he hadn’t been holding the baby, he was certain that he would’ve felt an even larger swell of anger, which was a mostly unfamiliar emotion for him. He was usually the easygoing brother, and Larenz liked to tease him about being the wuss of the trio. It pissed him off, but it didn’t make the words was less true.
Compared to his brothers, he was the most squeamish of the three, and he went out of his way to avoid violence whenever possible. So to feel this violent, especially towards someone who had meant so much to him before, was slightly disorienting. “You deliberately left carrying my child. You threw away everything I gave you, including that watch, and just ran. I thought I knew you.” He almost spat the last five words.