by Angela Smith
“I know you’re probably still pissed at me and trust me I wasn’t about to come here today – I was trying to give you time to adjust before coming by. But, here I am. I made a promise that I’d deliver this by 1 o’clock today,” Jeanette said, offering me a box wrapped in pretty silver paper. “You have to open it now. Those are orders from the person who gave it to me. I’m not trying to be demanding or anything.”
I took the box from her hand and pulled her in for a hug. Even though I was mad with her, I understood where she stood. She had told me before how much the job at Fashion and Flare meant to her and supporting her family was her main priority. Her parents were immigrants and didn’t have much money, so she was caring for them with the money she made from the magazine. Losing that job would be the beginning of the end for her.
“So, are you going to open it?” she said, with what I thought was a little bit of apprehension. There was no marking or card so I had no indication who sent her with this mysterious package but I had a feeling I wasn’t going to like its contents, no matter how shiny the wrapping paper was. I dug my nails around the edges and removed the silver paper in one smooth move. The box was long and flat. It was sealed well so I had a little bit of difficulty opening it but finally it budged and I was able to lift the cover.
“Oh my God!” Jeanette exclaimed as I took out a diamond heart necklace on a dainty gold chain. I felt my eyes welling up with tears as I looked at it and realized it was from Bayani. There was also a small album inside containing photos of us on each of our dates. How had he gotten these? I wondered as I flipped through pages showing us at the tree lighting on Pier 39 and at the restaurant on Forbes Island. There were even photos of us on Thanksgiving and in various New York locations. It was all too much.
“There’s something else,” Jeanette said, producing an envelope from her pocket and handing it to me. “He said to let you read that alone but I can stay if you want me to. I know it will be hard to hear anything from him right now.”
I simply nodded my head and sat down, wiping my tears on my sweatshirt sleeve. I then opened the letter and read it, not expecting all that it said.
“Dear Autumn,
I know I’m the last person you want to hear from but I just had to tell you a few things before it’s too late.
First off, I hope you like the necklace and photo album. I was going to give them to you on Valentine’s Day but there’s no point of saving them for that date as you’ve moved on and I must do the same. I picked the necklace out in New York after I saw you admiring it through the window of Golden Treasures. I thought it was perfect for you and I know you will look beautiful wearing it.
I can’t bare to think of you with anyone else but I suppose I must get used to it now. I messed up and I’m deeply sorry but in all honesty, it’s not what you think at all. I hope that one day I’ll be able to tell you the truth.
In the meantime, I’m going to go away for a while. I’m not sure when I’ll be back but I wanted you to know that I’ll be thinking of you every second of every day even if you’re not thinking of me. I’ve told Marisol of my plans and though she doesn’t agree with them, she did say that you’re more than capable of handling the Valentine’s Day Ball by yourself. I wish I could be there to see how it comes out but I can’t. I know you’ll do an amazing job though, as you do with everything.
Take care of yourself and please remember that I didn’t do anything to intentionally hurt you. I love you more than I can express and seeing you with someone else will only make things harder for me. It’s best if I move on and start fresh somewhere else.
Please forgive me for ruining things.
I love you, now and always.
Bayani x
After I’ve stopped crying enough to form words, I ask Jeanette if she knew that he was leaving.
“No, of course not. I mean it seemed kind of weird that he wanted this delivered today at a certain time but I didn’t think anything of it.”
“So what do I do now?” I wailed as she pulled me to her and rubbed my back like a mother would.
“I don’t know, Autumn. I just don’t know.”
After Jeanette left I sat on down with Clara and tried to watch TV, although in all honesty it was probably watching me more than I was watching it. The letter from Bayani and the subsequent weeping had left me so worn out that I could barely keep my eyes open. As much as I wanted to call or stop by Marisol’s and find out where he was going to, I couldn’t bring myself to do anything at all. I knew at this point that I had made a major mistake in not believing what Bayani had said. Sophie and he probably weren’t doing anything bad when I called and she was probably just trying to test me by making bitchy comments. It worked, that’s for sure.
The following morning I got up early (even though my body was begging for more sleep) and did my usual run with Clara. Since we were doing it earlier than usual, most places were closed. We’d pass a café here or there that was open but for the most part the city was still engulfed in a beautiful and peaceful silence.
I had plans to go see Marisol today. She had been released from the hospital last week and although I went to see her almost daily, I hadn’t been over in two days. I wanted to check in on her and make sure she was taking her medication and I also wanted to know just how much she knew about Bayani and where he went. I really can’t believe that he up and left. I mean, yes, I wanted to hurt him just a little because he had hurt me but now I know how childish I was being. Deep down, I really didn’t want to hurt him at all. I wanted to hold him tight and never let him go again. And now thanks to my own stupidity and need to prove that he never really cared about me, I’ll never get the chance to tell him how sorry I am.
When I arrive at Marisol’s I don’t even notice the car in the driveway or hear the tinny voice coming from the kitchen. I just walked in as usual and unleashed Clara. She bounded off towards the kitchen and I followed. I assumed that’s where Marisol will be holed up this morning. I’m stopped dead in my tracks though when I see Sophie standing near the stove looking like death warmed over. She’s not one to do minimalist so something must be seriously wrong. I want to turn around and run for the door but I know that would be the cowardly thing to do. Instead, I continue on and offer my hello to her before checking on Marisol.
“Hi Autumn. I didn’t think you’d be around here so early so I came by before work,” Sophie said, looking a little apologetic.
“It’s fine. I just came to see Marisol but seeing as she looks good and has you, there’s no need for me to be here now. I’ll come back later.”
“No. Stay,” Sophie exclaimed, grabbing my hand. “Please. I think we need to talk about some...things.”
Do we ever! But in all honesty, I don’t want to talk to her. She purposely ruined the best thing in my life and no excuse can make up for that. Looking at her in her gym shorts and t-shirt, I knew there was something she wanted to get off her chest. I might as well be the better person this time around and let her tell me whatever it was before I made assumptions. You know how far that got me last time around!
“Fine. I’ll be in the sitting room.” I walk away and let Sophie and Marisol finish their conversation. The sitting room is clean and neat as always but seems far too big for one 99-year-old woman. I wonder how much longer Marisol plans to stay in this house. Not that I think she should leave but it might make sense for her to downsize a bit. There’s just so much house here for one woman to keep up.
A few minutes pass before Sophie comes in and sits on the chair across from me. I fold my legs up under myself and look at her, long and hard. She doesn’t look happy. If she won Bayani she should be ecstatic, but it’s obvious that she’s not.
“So what’s up?” I ask.
“Autumn, I can’t even begin to tell you how sorry I am for ruining things for you with Bayani. I think I was just so jealous that he loved you and cared for you so deeply. I didn’t think it was possible for him to have fallen so hard so fast, which is w
hy I tried to pull him away from you. The more I tried, the more he resisted. He even told me, flat out, on numerous occasions that you were it for him so I should just move on. Of course, I couldn’t. He’s everything I’ve ever wanted and I honestly hated you for taking him from me. So when my little brother got sick – he has cancer – I took him to Bayani’s because I know he is the most doting person around. I didn’t want anyone at work to know about the situation because I need to keep up my image there but Bayani knew and I trusted him not to tell anyone. He helped me to care for my brother and then he fell asleep on the couch. When you called I had been asleep too – on the floor – but took the opportunity to hurt you by making you think we were doing something we weren’t. I don’t know why I did it but I know that it was wrong and ultimately, it cost me more than I realized. At least Bayani was my friend before but now…well, now he’s quit his job, gone into his shell and taken off on some bizarre excursion because he can’t stand to see you with someone else—“
“I’m not…with someone else. I made that up to protect myself. I mean, I did meet this guy Noah and he did give me his number but I threw it away. I only told Bayani I was seeing someone because I wanted him to miss me like I missed him.” I shake my head. I can’t believe I let it come to this point. We had so much in front of us and I let one little thing ruin it all. Even though he knew he was innocent he still didn’t share Sophie’s secret. That alone told me so much about his character. He was one of a kind.
“You don’t happen to know where he went do you?” I asked.
“No, sorry. He hasn’t spoken a word to me since that night.”
I felt bad for Sophie, I really did. She may seem to have it all but from what I had come to understand her parents weren’t around, she was caring for her sick brother and she wanted the one man who didn’t want her.
“How is your brother now? Is he OK?”
“God. I can’t even believe you’re asking me that! I just told you I purposely ruined your relationship and you’re asking me how my brother is. You and Bayani are a match made in heaven…but he’s fine. Thanks for asking.”
We talked for a little while longer and I realized that underneath all the makeup and clothes, Sophie really was a genuinely nice person. She just had to keep up the façade at work so that those working under her didn’t dare step on her feet. I understood that to an extent but I wished that she would show her vulnerable side more often. Just not to my boyfriend. Sorry, sorry. I mean ex-boyfriend.
When Sophie left to go get ready for the workday, I had breakfast with Marisol – luckily there were no Thanksgiving pies on the table today! – and we talked about the Valentine’s Day Ball and how it was coming along nicely. Pretty soon I’d have the decorations I custom-ordered and I planned on attending bingo again this week to get some ideas for what the seniors in the area might like to see or experience.
“Autumn dear, we need to have a chat about a few more serious subjects, I’m afraid,” Marisol said suddenly. I was sensing there was some not so good news coming my way.
“First off, I know you want to find out more about those ghosts that have been haunting you for years and I’ve been given some information by your grandfather,” she said, sliding a piece of paper across the table towards me. There were a bunch of numbers on it, but none of them made any sense to me.
“What are these?”
“They’re reference numbers. He said for you to go back to the library and ask the librarian to look up those numbers. He thinks there will be something of interest there for you. Always digging, that old man of yours.”
I smiled to myself because I knew my grandfather was a history buff. He loved the stuff and kept an entire library in the house full of history books and maps. Finding out the history of our house was probably right up his alley.
“Thanks. I’ll check this out later today.”
It was about time that I left so Marisol could rest. Her nurse would be coming soon and after that I was sure she’d want to sleep. She was home and doing better but in my opinion she looked rather weak and still had trouble breathing when she walked. I didn’t want to tire her out too much by hanging around chit chatting. Before I left, I had one last question that had been lingering on my mind for a while now.
“Marisol, do you know where Bayani went?”
“Of course dear. That silly palooka went off to Australia to “find himself” whatever that is supposed to mean. Sounds like a dumkuff mission if you ask me, but the brokenhearted will go to extremes to find peace, I suppose.”
I headed straight over to the library after leaving Marisol’s house. Clara was asleep in her plush bed, Marisol was going to take a nap and I was going to find out what kind of information my grandfather had found out about the past.
Holding on to the list of reference numbers for dear life I headed over to the same librarian who had helped me last time, hoping that’d she be able to make sense of the jumbled up digits on the paper.
“Hi, I’m not sure if you remember me but I was in here in November looking up the Bridgewater Triangle and I was wondering if you could help me find these books,” I said, showing her the scrap of paper with Marisol’s almost illegible handwriting.
“Let me look them up for you. It’ll just take a few minutes.” I thanked her and sat down in the chair near the newspapers. I might as well look like I’m doing something rather than standing around aimlessly like a stalker. People might think I was creepy if I did that. Which I’m not, obviously.
“Well, I’ve looked up all the numbers and the top three came up with matches, which I’ve pulled for you. But the bottom number isn’t a number of any books we have here. In all honesty, it looks more like a bank account number,” the librarian said as she returned the paper to me for verification. She was right, it did look slightly out of place. I’d have to ask Marisol about that later on.
I took the books offered to me and sat down at a nearby table. I loved how libraries have you space to read and look over things without being distracted. It was such a nice feeling to know that I could look at these books in peace and hopefully find what I was looking for.
I scanned through the pages looking for the page number written on the paper. The first two books didn’t tell me anything I didn’t already know but the third gave me a host of new information.
Apparently there was a Native American gravesite on the exact location where my street now stood. I knew it! There was also a lot of animosity between the Natives and the settlers who came and took the land in the land 1700’s. Since then it had been bought and sold multiple times, until it was used for development around 1900. That would make sense. My great-grandfather built our home around that time. Everything was starting to fall into place and I had the feeling that unless my mother sold that house or gave it to the Native American trust, neither of us would ever find any peace.
I thanked the librarian and then stopped to purchase a new cell phone. I had to have one and regretted my earlier outburst in which the really expensive and sleek phone I had loved smashed to smithereens. Once I was able to activate my phone I called my mother and filled her in on all the details. She said she’d consider it but didn’t say for sure that she would leave. She wasn’t one to move far away and had suffered with anxiety her entire life. Traveling for her was a major issue. I was so shocked that she came to visit me once as I knew how difficult it was for her to go out into the unknown.
After hanging up, I figured I should go back and check on Marisol. I had been gone for a few hours now and was curious as to what the fourth number on the paper was for. Luckily, I had a key in case she was still asleep.
Of course, being Marisol, she couldn’t stay down for long. When I entered she was up and dusting around the fireplace where she had her photos and other little trinkets. I was shocked to find out that she had gone and cut wood for the fireplace herself before I met her. She apparently felt as though there was no one else to do it, though she did acknowledge that she was ge
tting too old to do so much physical work.
“Marisol, do you know what the fourth number on this paper is for?” I asked, pointing to the number which was about 5 digits shorter than the rest and didn’t start with REF.
“Yes, I do. But first let’s talk about what you found. I’m interested to know if you came across anything of value in your search.”
“I did. I found quite a bit actually,” I said, telling her about the Natives and how the house was on a bad spot.
“I knew it had to be something like that. Now that you’ve left there you should be OK but your mother needs to leave too for the spirits to fully be gone.”
“I know. I called her already.”
“Glad you’re one step ahead of me, toots.” I smiled at her and then asked her to tell me what the other number was for so I could stop worrying.
“My dear, that number is for a bank account. I didn’t tell you earlier because I didn’t want to disrupt your search at the library but your beloved grandfather said that many years ago, just after you were born, he started a trust fund for you and never told a single sole. He was going to tell you himself but as you know…well, he went off for the Big Sleep a little earlier than expected.”
“So why is he giving it to me now then?”
“Because he knows what an awful mistake you’ve made with Bayani and he wants to you make it right.”
“And how will the numbers of a bank account make it right?” I inquired, wondering where this was going.
“There’s a substantial sum of money in that account that you can now access. Maybe you should use it for a trip to Australia or –“