Lilly nodded, realizing that the Rocking U Ranch was a little different in size and scope than her parents' ranch. At her parents' ranch, there had always been help just a ten minute or so ride away, but here at the Rocking U Ranch things were bigger, more spread out. Getting in serious trouble far away from home was possible. It was no wonder that Sam carried a pistol on her hip.
Chapter 3
The days at the Rocking U Ranch moved by slowly. It felt like a whole week had elapsed already and it was only the morning of the third day. Part of it was how Brad wouldn't let up on her, not even for a second. He wasn't mean or condescending about it, but it was so relentless that Lilly was starting to have a hard time with it. Today was the start of a big drive, and Lilly was determined to show Sam, Brad, and everyone else that she knew her way around a saddle and a steer, and could throw a lasso and shoot like the best of them.
All of the ranch hands were on their horses and were running them at a trot out to the cattle pen. The Rocking U Ranch had so many cattle Lilly could barely believe her eyes. Her parents' ranch had only had near five hundred, and that had been a real handful for her and her father and their few employees. The number of animals in front of her now made her wonder how the big outfits up north did it using people with so little experience. Was it really possible to get the job done right by the sheer number of individuals working on it? Lilly didn't like to think it so, but maybe it was.
“Get your head on straight,” Brad said. “You look like this is the first time you've seen this many cattle.”
Lilly hated the way Brad could read her.
“I'm fine, thanks,” Lilly said. “And don't you mind what I have my eyes on.”
“They just look big, that's all,” Brad said. “And I didn't want you to seem foolish in front of Sam—believe it or not I'm not such a bad guy sometimes.”
Lilly ducked her head and thanked Brad under her breath. He was probably right, she didn't have much of a poker face, and she knew it. It was incredible how a seasoned cowboy could keep all of his thoughts hidden behind the stonewall mask they all wore as faces. Lilly hoped she could have some measure of that ability, but she didn't want to lose who she was. Lilly liked that she wasn't hard like everyone else; she thought there was something to be said for being soft and easy going.
The great pen of cattle in front of her opened, and the herd issued forth. They started to stampede nearly immediately, but Brad and some of the more seasoned hands slowed the heard by cracking big bullwhips in the air over their heads. It seemed like complete chaos for a moment to Lilly, but then she saw with what skill Brad controlled everything. In the background was Sam watching from her horse. Lilly was taking it all in, and her horse was slowly walking backward away from the rumbling herd.
Behind Lilly, a rattlesnake lay coiled in the shade of a cactus. It rattled its tail in a vain attempt to warn the horse to stay away. It wasn't until it struck, and missed, that the horse realized the danger. It bucked, hard, and Lilly had to hold on for dear life. There had been other times in her life when she'd had to control an animal which was out of control, but not like this. The horse had been really badly spooked by the near strike and was bucking for its own life. There wasn't any malice in the animal’s actions, just the will to survive in an environment which was hostile. After a few minutes of wild bucking, the horse calmed down.
Just then part of the herd broke away. Lilly jabbed her spurs into the flanks of her stead and quickly brought the animals back to the main group. One was particularly stubborn, and Lilly had to use a lasso to drag it away from its course out into the open desert. She didn't think much of her actions, it being her job and all, but from out of nowhere came Sam's voice.
“You really are a hell of a cowgirl,” Sam said. “And that's something I respect more than anything else. The way you stayed on that horse after the snake spooked it, and the way you handled that rogue steer like it was nothing, you really are a good at this. Your parents' would be proud of you. Hell, I'm proud of you.”
Sam flashed Lilly a huge smile from on top of her horse. She'd ridden up behind Lilly while Lilly had been catching her breath from all of the excitement.
Lilly wasn’t sure why but she felt really good knowing she had had made Sam proud.
“I love how the cattle makes you live in the moment,” Lilly said. “The way I can't daydream or think about tomorrow. It's one of the things that makes the job enjoyable, the way I lose myself in it sometimes. I mean, one second I'm riding a bucking bronco, and the next minute I'm bringing back near thirty head of cattle to the herd by myself. It's just so . . . Exciting!”
Lilly stopped talking, realizing she sounded too eager, and blushed.
“Oh, don't be silly and get embarrassed,” Sam said. “You should be proud of what you did just then. Not every cowboy can do that, and you are out here showing the world your skills! Look at all the men looking at you. That's real jealousy. They're all wondering if they would have had what it takes to actually handle what the countryside can throw at you. Because if you'd been bucked, well, I've seen what being thrown hard can do to a person, and it's not pretty. That would have thrown off the entire drive. And sometimes it even stops an operation, because it just demoralizes everyone.”
Sam brought her horse a little closer to Lilly's.
“Listen,” Sam said. “Later, I want to speak with you alone.”
Lilly nodded, and she felt like butterflies in her stomach. What did Sam wanted to talk about, and why did that woman make her nervous? Sam turned her horse and rode back to the front of the herd. It was only a few seconds before she was replaced by Brad. He looked stern.
“I wish you knew better than letting your horse walk backward over ground you haven't checked,” Brad said. “I realize you just did all the right things, but it started out with the wrong thing. Just food for thought is all. I'm not trying to be buzz-kill, but I'm also not trying to tell your parents how I watched you break your neck at the start of a big drive.”
With that, Brad was off. Lilly was by herself for a moment before she spurred her horse after the herd to join the rest of the cowhands. In those brief, few moments, Lilly felt so alive. And she also felt lucky to be alive. This was what being a cowgirl was all about, the little things that were hard to explain, like the look of the sun as her whole body whipped back as the horse bucked, or the way the steer felt as she wrapped her end of the lasso around her saddle horn and walked it back to the herd by force from the top of her horse.
It was good to feel alive, healthy and free. On her parents' ranch oftentimes there had been moments when she hadn't felt like she was free, mostly because the ranch had been so small. On a ranch, those little surprises are hard to come by. Everyone covers the same ground so much that all the snakes get stamped out, and the routes the cattle run are worn into the ground like a reverse carpet. There really wasn't a whole lot of what Lilly considered fun about the job when she worked at her parents' ranch. Now, at the Rocking U Ranch, things were much different.
Lilly felt lucky to be working at the Rocking U Ranch, and she also felt lucky that Sam had seen her do such a damn fine job. Lilly knew deep down it was prideful to think that way, but that didn't mean that she didn't occasionally have those thoughts. Especially when it came to her gorgeous boss, and catching her eye from afar. That made Lilly feel good, real good.
Chapter 4
Later that night all the cowhands sat around a big bonfire Sam had built with Brad. They'd had someone cart along most of the wood because it was so hard to find out on the plains. Everyone passed around a bottle and talked to each other about how the day's work had been. Sam made her way around the campfire, speaking to each of her cowhands, before sitting next to Lilly.
“Hey, how are you feeling? The day went well, I thought,” Sam said. “You know, there really is something about running a herd around the plains that makes me feel like everything is right in the world. And even though the boys up north are running herds twice this si
ze with six times the people, I still feel pretty good.”
“I was thinking about that today,” Lilly said. She still felt nervous being so close to Sam, but after watching her all night she had finally realized why that was. She wanted Sam, she was intoxicated by her personality, her looks and her strength. But did Sam feel the same about her?
“How in the world do the bigger operations get things done when they hire pretty much anyone who is willing, no matter how little they know?” – Lilly said trying to behave normal
“Well, first of all, they don't pay shit,” Sam said. “And secondly, they don't have them do anything that would take skill. They have what they call 'hand handlers' for that, kind of like squad leaders in the military. I don't know. Me and Brad have talked about changing things to that style of operation because we both served and we know that it sort of works, but at the end of the day, I'd like to run things around here a little leaner than that. I don't want to look around and know that more than three-fourths of my employees are pretty much worthless to do anything but put themselves between the herd and the open plane.”
Lilly nodded. Sam had a way with words—simple and straightforward, but not unthoughtful. It impressed Lilly, made her want to hear more of Sam's voice.
“Do you like it so far. The whole working for the Rocking U Ranch thing?” Sam asked.
“It's different than I thought it would be,” Lilly said. “But not in a bad way at all. I just didn't ever envision a strong woman like you running it, especially one so . . .”
This time, it was Lilly's turn to trail off. Sam smiled a knowing smile and put her hand on Lilly's leg.
“You know, we could slip off into the night, and no one would care that we were gone,” Sam said. “That's one of the beautiful things about the Rocking U Ranch—everyone has your back, but everyone minds their own business at the same time.”
Lilly thought about it as she ran her hand over the top of Sam's. It felt good to be wanted by someone she wanted back, and Lilly knew that she would go with Sam anywhere she wanted. But she wanted to talk a little bit first. There was so much about Sam that Lilly didn't know, but wanted to know.
“I'd like to know how the Rocking U Ranch came to be,” Lilly said. “There is just so much about this place, and you, I don't know. But I hope you can fill me in. And then, the dark, well, it does offer some privacy.”
Lilly moved her hand from Sam's hand to Sam's leg.
“The Rocking U Ranch started back when my parents were around,” Sam said. “But then they moved back east and sold it to me. I'm not sure what they're doing now. We aren't close, and they honestly just kind of got under my skin most of the time. They always had some backward ass opinions about things that I didn't want to hear. So that's how the Rocking U Ranch started. As far as me, this is what I do. I spend nearly all my time doing it. When I'm not out here on the plains or working out administrative stuff, I can usually be found reading some smutty romance novel I picked up at the dime store.”
Lilly smiled when she heard this. She loved to read, and it was always nice to meet a kindred spirit in that regard.
“I like to read, too,” Lilly said. “We should start a book club.”
Then Lilly realized that no one was going to come to a book club when they spent so much time working.
“I guess I sound like a dope,” Lilly said. “But I'm a nerd at heart, and get excited about stuff like that.”
The fire blazed higher as someone poured gasoline on it.
“You don't sound like a dope,” Sam said. “Just hopeful, in the right way. Some people, when they first start working here, they act all jaded because they think it's going to help them somehow. But it never does, and all they manage to do is take all the fun out of a job that is hard enough as it is. I'm just trying to say that I'm glad that you're earnest and have a good heart. I'm so sick of all the want to be hard ass cowboys I see in the business today. There are just so many. So you're a gem, really.”
Sam leaned over and kissed Lilly briefly on the lips. No one saw, Lilly's eyes flashed around when Sam pulled away just to check. People were drunk, and not just a little drunk, but very drunk. It dawned on Lilly that she and Sam most likely could do whatever they wanted to each other right by the fire, and no one would really notice. But they couldn't do that. They had to hide it.
So they both took off, heading out into the night. Lilly was sure to bring a saddle blanket so that they would be able to lay next to each other—the flat ground of the plains was covered in rocks and thistles. As the two women made their way away from the rest of the cowhands, the fire was but a prick of light in a sea of darkness. Lilly threw the blanket out on the ground and sat on it, Sam quickly followed her lead.
“Do you think any of them noticed? They are probably too drunk, I guess,” Lilly said. “But I still kind of worry about it, you know? I don't want people to take me less seriously because we are, well, kind of getting involved.”
Sam eased her way across the blanket so that she was touching Lilly, and started to run her hands over the other woman's body, being sure to cup her breasts and kiss her neck.
“We should probably keep it a secret,” Sam said. “Just because, well, you do have a point. While I don't think Brad would have a problem with it, I do think he might give you a little shit. But the rest, I don't know. As much as I like to think that I've hired people that are completely different than the dunderheads up north, I'm willing to wager that no one was paying attention, and if they were, they're so drunk that they'll wonder if they weren't just getting their wires crossed. What if we'd come out here to smoke a joint?”
Lilly kissed Sam deeply, pushing her back so that Lilly was on top of her. She smiled down at the now not so confident anymore Sam, who was clearly smitten by Lilly to the point of no return. It made Lilly feel good to know that she could have that effect on someone who she found to be very attractive, but it was also a slightly scary thing. Lilly didn't want to mess things up at the Rocking U Ranch, and if things didn't go well between her and Sam, or the dynamic between herself and the rest of the cowhands changed for the worse because of it, that would be bad. It was easy to ruin things, and hard to keep them going well.
“I want you to promise me that you won't tell anyone,” Lilly said. “Not anyone!”
“Oh, baby,” Sam said. “You never had to worry about anything like that from me. Now come here and give momma some sugar.”
They fell into each other, further and further. Rolling around on the blanket both of them rediscovered what it means to be completely in tune with someone else. It was a beautiful moment, a really great feeling. They made love under the stars again and again, and then finally, when both had had their fill, they headed back to the fire.
Chapter 5
The next morning Lilly couldn't tell if anyone else realized what had happened between her and Sam the night before. But, for whatever reason, Brad was really riding her ass. It might not have been because of the late night tryst, but Lilly didn't know for certain.
“You need to hurry up, Lilly,” Brad said. “I know that you think you're special or something, but you've been moving slow all day. The rest of the workers haven't been moving slow, and everyone got drunk last night! So why are you moving so slowly?”
Lilly didn't say anything, but instead spurred her horse faster. She didn't want to start this negative feedback cycle of getting under the skin of others or allowing them to get under her skin. It wasn't that she wasn't tough or couldn't take it, it was that everyone had a job to do, even Brad.
“Brad,” Lilly said. “I'd like to know what job you aren't doing right now so I can do it?”
Brad didn't say anything back to her.
“Was that not enough like the military or something,” Lilly said. “I mean, it was sort of terse, but still not too disrespectful. I figured you'd be all over it—“
“That's enough, Lilly,” Brad said. “I don't need your mouth.”
Brad reared his hors
e up on its hind legs and galloped away. Lilly wondered what it was all about but then saw Sam watching from the distance with a worried look on her face. Lilly had never thought to think that she might upset Brad by sleeping with Sam. Although she hadn't thought about it before, now she did think about all the possible nights they might have spent together or all the times Brad could have watched Sam do the same thing she did last night with other people.
Lilly shook her head and tried to clear the thoughts. She didn't want to have to always think about the might bes, or the could bes, but now she had to. Once she slept with Sam, she crossed a line, one that she had only kind of been aware of, but she'd been aware of none the less. Now it was fair game for the other workers to keep a little closer track of her, because what if the boss lady was letting Lilly fuck off because they had been together? There was also the possibility that none of them knew, and that Brad was just an ass, but that wasn't what she'd read on Sam's face as she looked on from the distance.
The idea that Brad might be giving her a hard time because he knew that she and Sam had found something special together made Lilly furious. Who did he think he was anyway, to pass judgment on the decisions of two other adults. It just didn't put good feelings in her heart to know that Brad was the kind of person who looked down on others. But maybe he wasn't, Lilly thought, maybe it was all just a coincidence, and Brad didn't mean anything by it.
To blow off steam, Lilly threw herself into the work. Whenever a part of the herd broke away to make a break for freedom across the planes, there Lilly was, to bring them back to the herd. Whenever there was a place that the fence needed to be mended, there Lilly was, tying a piece of neon marking tape to the spot so that a cowhand could easily come back and identify it. The fence was only on the side of the run, the east side. The west side was open, and if Lilly wanted to, she could have taken off west and rode all the way to the coast, all the way until the land ended and nothing but water stretched out in front of her as far as the eye could see.
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