The Lipstick Laws

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The Lipstick Laws Page 9

by Amy Holder


  Haley's voice pops in my mind: "There are plenty of other Lipstick Law casualties."

  I wonder if Darci is one of them. I'm staring at her, trying to picture if Britney would have been friends with her at some point. She catches me staring, so I look away for a moment. After a minute or two, I lean into the aisle, deciding that I have to ask her.

  "Hey, Darci, are you a Lipstick Lawbreaker?"

  She stares back at me blankly. "A what?"

  "A Lipstick Lawbreaker," I repeat. "You know, the 'Lipstick Oath,'" I say, using finger quotes.

  "Uh ... I don't think so ... No. Definitely not!" she responds, looking unusually shocked.

  I have an overwhelming suspicion that she thinks I'm asking her if she's a lesbian. I wonder if she thinks I'm trying to pick her up.

  I lean back over and say, "I'm not a lesbian."

  "Ummm ... okay. That's fine," she says uncomfortably.

  I analyze her stunned expression and quickly add, "Not that there's anything wrong with that. You know ... being a lesbian and all. Not that I am one or anything."

  "Right," she says, inching closer to the window, using her backpack as a blockade between us.

  The rest of the ride is really awkward.

  ***

  As I get close to my locker, I see that a small crowd has formed around it. Some are pointing, some are whispering to each other ... but most are laughing. I brush them away and see the most stomach-sickening sight: a bunch of tampons taped to my locker, slathered with thick, bright red waxy goop. The words SKUNK SKANK are scribbled with the same gloppy stuff. It doesn't take me long to realize the goop is the Lipstick Oath lipstick. Tears fill my eyes. My face bubbles with humiliation heat, surely turning bright red like the lipstick. I'm embarrassed beyond belief.

  A minute after the hall has emptied for first period, I hear the clanking of dress shoes behind me.

  "See. Right there."

  "Thank you, Angie."

  Out of the corner of my eye I see a small freshman scurry off. She looks back a few times before turning the corner.

  "April?" A woman's voice tries to get my attention.

  It doesn't work. My tampered locker is like a magnet. I can't bear to turn around.

  "April?" She taps my shoulder.

  There's a delay, but eventually I respond quietly without breaking my gaze. "Yeah?"

  ***

  I'm horrified when I see that the chair in the principal's office is just a shade darker than the lipstick on my locker. Those biatches have ruined the color red for me.

  "April, do you know who did this?"

  Of course I know! I know exactly who did this! I even know the exact lipstick she used! However, I shake my head no, knowing that tattling is a cardinal sin in high school—almost worse than being a complete loser.

  "Please, honey, look at me," Mrs. Wagner says compassionately. Tears fall from my eyes as I look up at her. "I know this is hard, but if you know who did this, you have to tell me. I will not tolerate this behavior in my school. The person responsible for this needs to be punished!"

  My chin trembles; I open my mouth to speak, but nothing comes out. She hands me a tissue and continues, "Whoever it is doesn't need to know that you told me."

  I know she knows that I know. Looking down, I shake my head again, mumbling, "I don't know, Mrs. Wagner."

  I go through the rest of the day like a complete zombie. I don't answer teachers in class, I don't go to lunch, I don't try to talk to Jessica in Spanish class, and I don't even do my normal Tuesday walk-by to spy on Matt in his gym class. It's like I'm not even here at all—exactly how I want it to be.

  As depressingly aloof as I've been all day, I'm able to focus on the video about World War II in ninth-period history. The soldier carrying a grenade on the screen suddenly morphs into Britney Taylor hauling a massive tampon. I rub my eyes repeatedly and take another look. It's back to the black-and-white war clip. Great, now I'm seeing things.

  Mr. Stuart strolls by my desk, casually dropping me a note: SEE ME AFTER CLASS FOR DETENTION. I'm not surprised; I skipped his class yesterday. What I am surprised about is that he hasn't humiliated me in front of the class. Even Mr. Gladiator Man has more tact than Britney.

  "So?" Mr. Stuart says after all the other students have left for the day. "I think you have some explaining to do."

  I remain tightlipped at my desk, sliding my shoe in circles on the floor below.

  "April, I know you were in school yesterday. You're in my homeroom, remember?" He gets up from behind his desk and walks over to me. His massive frame surrounds me in a shadow of doom. "Where were you ninth period yesterday?"

  Feeling word-vomit creeping up my throat, I blurt, "I was with people who I thought were friends, getting my life ruined!"

  My hand slaps over my mouth immediately. Oops! Did I just say that?

  Mr. Stuart steps back, clearly not expecting what he heard. "Well, regardless of why ... you need to put your time in here at detention."

  He walks back to his desk.

  Shocking. I really expected him to have a major freak-out fest over this. I mean, everyone knows he's crazier than a shaved mule in a toboggan race. This is definitely not the response I predicted. Feeling relieved but somewhat skeptical, I cover my head on my desk in mourning. Mourning for my life lost to the Lipstick Laws.

  Halfway through my forty-five-minute prison sentence, I haven't lifted my head once, until I'm startled by Mr. Stuart's deep voice.

  "You know, I wasn't always this big, tough football coach," he says nonchalantly while grading a paper at his desk.

  I look around, wondering if someone else slipped in the room while I was grieving.

  He looks up from his paper at me. "You hear me?"

  "Yes?" I say, not knowing where he's going with this.

  "I hated high school," he says. "Nope, ya couldn't pay me to go back..." He grins. "As a student, that is."

  "What do you mean?"

  "I didn't play football in high school. I was the ball. Kicked around like you wouldn't believe." He grimaces at the thought.

  "Really?" I say in disbelief.

  "Really! I know it's hard to believe now ... with these guns and all." He points to his huge biceps and laughs.

  I laugh too. This is the most human I've ever seen Mr. Stuart. Maybe he's not the roid-raging monster that I thought he was.

  "Remember, April, high school doesn't last forever. It'll be over before you know it. Let what you go through today motivate you to become a stronger person tomorrow. That's what I did, and look at me. The guys that kicked me around then would run from me now." He grins proudly and returns to grading the paper.

  "Thanks," I mumble. I'm not sure if he hears me, though. I stare at him, trying to imagine him as a bullied kid. It's completely impossible to even picture it. Something that he said rings true to me. Britney Taylor and her stupid Lipstick Laws don't define me. Ten years from now, I'm not going to have a lipstick-smudged tampon taped to my forehead. Or at least I hope not...

  Suddenly motivated to do what I had talked about with Haley yesterday, I decide that it's time to fight back. I'm a Lipstick Lawbreaker, and I'm going to dethrone Britney and her Lipstick Laws if it's the last thing I do!

  With my remaining detention time, I try to devise a plan. How can I connect with other Lipstick Lawbreakers? I can't very well go around asking all the girls in school if they broke the Lipstick Laws. I mean, Darci Madison already thinks I'm crazy for my shenanigans on the bus today. Obviously, I'll have to get them to come to me somehow ... but how do I manage that without Britney finding out? Then, out of nowhere, the answer comes to me.

  "The school newspaper!" I blurt out excitedly.

  Mr. Stuart jumps. "You okay, April?"

  Oops ... didn't mean to say that out loud. "Sorry, just talking to myself."

  Puzzled, he returns to his work.

  Brilliant idea! Britney and the girls wouldn't be caught dead reading the school newspaper. I'll put an ad in
the section on the back page where people advertise for clubs. I'll ask them to run the ad for a couple of weeks, giving enough time for other Lipstick Lawbreakers to see it. But where should the first meeting take place? I can't very well advertise my address ... that wouldn't be too smart. I rack my brain for ideas. For obvious reasons, it can't be anywhere in the school. And the Lawlords live at the mall, so that's out. It has to be somewhere that they would never go. I've got it—I elect not to announce my idea to Mr. Stuart this time—the Penford Public Library!

  I use the last ten minutes of detention to write up a clever ad. Something that only other Lipstick Lawbreakers will understand:

  Attention Lipstick Lawbreakers:

  Was the Oath not all you thought it would, be?

  Did you wear the wrong clothes? Did you hide too many secrets?

  Or maybe your decisions were too unique

  to appeal to the Lawlords?

  Are you sick of being cast as a social misfit

  and ready to take a stand?

  Whatever your Lipstick Lawbreaking story may be,

  come meet others just like you.

  We can make a difference together!

  Meeting Date: December 12th

  Meeting Time: 7pm

  Meeting Place: Penford Public Library (the back table)

  Dress Code: Wear anything but the color red!

  Chapter Ten

  After sitting alone at the Penford Public Library for a while, I begin to wonder if this was a bad idea. It's three minutes before seven, and I've only seen a few people back here: a frustrated young mother trying to catch her sugar-high child, a librarian putting away reference books, and a cute elderly lady looking for bird watching books.

  It's 6:59—still nobody. Maybe they'll be right on time.

  Nope, 7:02—still alone. I guess they could be running a few minutes late. The weather is bad today.

  Tapping my finger impatiently, I start to feel really foolish for thinking this would work. I try to distract myself with a book; however, my watch keeps calling my name. It's 7:10 now. I should probably admit defeat. Feeling embarrassed, I've started gathering my stuff to leave when a soft voice interrupts me...

  "Ummm ... hi. Is this supposed to be a meeting?"

  I look up to see Melanie Elmer standing in front of me. I suddenly remember she was best friends with Britney last year. They were practically attached at the hip. She has to be in the right place. I'm giddy with excitement!

  "Yes!" I say. "You mean, from the ad in the school paper, right?"

  She nods. Relief releases the tension in her cheeks. She smiles and says, "I'm a Lipstick Lawbreaker."

  A few seconds later, two other girls show up together. Melanie and I greet them with welcoming smiles.

  "Is this the Lipstick Lawbreaker meeting?" they inquire.

  "Yes," I say. "Thanks for coming!"

  "I'm Ashley, and this is Rachel." Rachel waves as they sit down.

  Melanie and I introduce ourselves. I can already tell that I'm going to like all three of these girls. They're certainly not the suffering misfits that Britney has referred to.

  "I guess we should wait a little longer before we start. Maybe more people are coming," I say.

  "Yeah, it's half a blizzard out there. I would've been on time, but I had to scrape ice off my car," Melanie says, taking off her scarf and gloves.

  "I think someone else is coming." I point to a tall figure emerging from the rows of books. The closer she comes, the more peculiar she looks.

  "Oh my!" Rachel exclaims.

  "Interesting outfit," Ashley mumbles.

  Melanie's mouth hangs open. She whispers, "Is that a guy in women's clothing?"

  "I think it is," I mutter, admiring the superb job he's done stuffing his bra.

  "Is this the Lipstick Lawbreaker meeting?" his deep voice croaks. When he brushes the long blond wig from his face, he suddenly realizes that four girls ... four real girls ... are sitting in front of him.

  "Hey! Wait a second. What's going on?" he asks.

  "You tell us!" I laugh.

  Clearly disappointed, he says, "This isn't a cross-dressing club, is it?"

  "No!" we reply in sync.

  Looking uneasy, he explains, "You know, I just thought when I read the ad ... I mean, it was sorta misleading. Lipstick Lawbreakers ... wrong clothes ... unique decisions ... hiding secrets ... social misfit ... yadda-yadda ... you get the idea. Um, so ... I guess I was wrong."

  Melanie recognizes him. "Mark? I never knew..."

  "Oh! Hey, Mel! Ummmm ... Let's, ah ... let's just pretend this never happened. I'm gonna get going," he murmurs, adjusting his periwinkle blouse as he stumbles away in high heels.

  Stunned, we all stare at each other in disbelief.

  Melanie breaks the silence. "It's pretty sad that Mark Rhinehart puts on makeup better than I do. That guy deserves some serious props."

  We burst into laughter. Five minutes later, we begin to compose ourselves. Our faces are purple, and our stomachs are sore from laughing.

  "Do you think anyone else is coming?" I giggle.

  "I don't think my sides can handle any more surprise guests," Rachel says, holding her stomach.

  "So, I guess we can get things started now," I say, thankful for the unpredictable opening. After all, laughter is always the best icebreaker.

  "Obviously we all have a couple things in common," I say, looking around at the girls. "We all signed the Lipstick Oath at some point. And at some point after that, we all broke a Lipstick Law and got kicked out of the group by the head Lipstick Lawlord ... Britney Taylor. Am I right?"

  I glance around at three nodding heads.

  "Yes," they say.

  "But I'm sure our Lipstick Lawbreaking stories aren't all the same," I add. "And I feel like the best place to start is to hear everyone's story. After that, we can figure out what we want to do from there. If nothing else, this is a great way to come together and vent."

  Melanie smiles. "I'm dying to hear everyone's story! I've felt like I'm going through this all on my own. It's nice to be around people who can relate."

  "I totally agree," I say. "So, who wants to start?"

  "I'll start," Rachel says swiftly, taking a deep breath before beginning her story. "I became close friends with Britney Taylor in eighth grade. She had just gotten in a big fight with her science partner and asked our teacher to switch partners. Lucky me, right?"

  I secretly wonder if the science partner Rachel's referring to was Haley. I bet it was.

  Rachel continues. "I was friends with Britney for a month before she asked me to sign the Lipstick Oath. Things were okay at first until my mom lost her job. We were kind of struggling for a while and I wanted to help out. Obviously, no one would hire me at thirteen, so I decided to sell some of my stuff on eBay. Britney was horror-struck when she found out that I sold a lot of my nicest clothes. She said I was breaking Lipstick Laws One and Two, and immediately kicked me out."

  "That's terrible!" Melanie says.

  "I know ... it was! And I'm sure you guys can relate; she made my life hell after that. One day, she came up to me in lunch ... and I was hopeful she wanted to be friends again. Instead, she handed me a five-dollar gift certificate to the Dollar Closet and told me to go buy a new wardrobe. Then she got half the school to call me DC."

  "What does that mean?" I ask.

  "It stands for Dollar Closet." She shudders.

  Melanie and I gasp.

  "That's so mean!" I say.

  Rachel points to Ashley. "I wouldn't have survived it all without her."

  "So, what's your story?" Melanie and I switch our attention to Ashley.

  "Well, I've been friends with Rachel forever, and she convinced me to sign the Lipstick Oath." She looks at Rachel, scrunching her nose. "Shortly after I took the Oath, the group turned on Rachel. And Britney demanded that I drop her, too. When I wouldn't stop talking to her, Brit flipped out, saying I was breaking Lipstick Law Four. She kicked me out a
t the end of eighth grade—"

  Rachel interjects, "After Britney kicked me out, she considered me a member of the geek kingdom and didn't want anyone talking to me ... even my best friend."

  "That seems to be the norm," Melanie says.

  "Well, I wasn't about to drop Rachel." Ashley shakes her head incredulously. "Why would I choose Britney Taylor over my best friend since kindergarten? I only signed the Lipstick Oath for Rachel to begin with."

  Rachel looks at Ashley and smiles. It's nice to see that friendships can survive the Lipstick Laws. It seems like it may have even made them closer.

  "So, how about you?" Ashley points to Melanie.

  "Oh gosh, where do I start?" Melanie sighs heavily. "I met Brit at a pool party the summer before freshman year. It was actually Brianna's party."

  "Lipstick Law Brianna? Bri Thompson?" I say.

  "Yeah, Lipstick Law Brianna. Believe it or not, Bri and I had been friends for a while before she got infatuated with Britney. She was pretty cool back then."

  "I just can't picture her not infatuated with Brit," I say.

  Melanie agrees. "I know what you mean! After they met, Britney was all Brianna would talk about. She was obsessed with fitting in with her. She dressed like her, tried to talk like her, and even acted like her—it was kind of pathetic. Obviously, after all the talk, I was really curious to meet Britney. I always knew who she was, but I never really talked to her ... until Brianna's party. After that, Brit called me every day to hang out. By the time school started in September, we were super close ... and Brianna was super jealous! She was so mad when she found out that I signed the Lipstick Oath and she wasn't asked to sign it."

  "I can imagine!" I say.

  "Yeah, Brianna became more and more frustrated with every passing month ... and no Lipstick Law invite. I guess she got so fed up and jealous that she decided to stab me in the back."

  "What'd she do?" we ask, wide-eyed.

  "She made up this elaborate story about me trying to get with Britney's ex-boyfriend Brad Miller." Melanie shakes her head. "It was a total lie, but you know how crazy Britney is about friends flirting with her exes."

  "You know her father left her mom for her mom's best friend, right?" Rachel reveals.

 

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