“Put me down right now, Ash. And I will reconsider removing your balls with a pair of nail clippers.”
Derren covered his junk.
Lix grinned.
Asher grunted, shifting me on his shoulder and kept moving. What. The. Actual. Fuck. We burst out the doors of the bar.
“Jesus, Ashy. This is the best night ever. First I hook up with that sweet redhead on the beach and now this,” Lix crowed, grasping his hands as if in prayer. “Can I watch when you guys get back to your room? Please let me stay. I’ll be real quiet. I’ll sit in the corner. I’ll be no trouble. I swear.”
I unfisted Ash’s shirt and patted his rear. “Look, I’ll be the bigger person here.” This earned me a grunt. I persevered. “You obviously wanted me to call much sooner. The truth is, I was about to.” I was about to call and tell him I lurved him. Another cavemannish grunt. “I said some things I didn’t mean and so did you. Why don’t you put me down and we can talk?” I said in an even tone. This earned me a slap on the ass. Okay, no more Mr. Nice Guy, or Miss Nice Gal, in my case. “You’re going to be so sorry when this jealous caveman bullshit is over, Asher.” I tried one last time. “This is kidnapping.” He forced me to take drastic measures. My arms circled his waist as if in a backward hug. “Ash, I’m sorry.”
His stride slowed. I had his attention. Excellent.
“I’m so sorry you’ve made me do this.” I reached down and squeezed his nuts. This was particularly effective considering my ornery rocker didn’t wear underwear. He hissed, jerked, and I slid from his shoulder, easy as butter from a hot pan. I landed on my feet and stepped back, hair wild and partially in my eyes. My earlier summation that Ash couldn’t get much angrier went up in flames. He lunged for me. I stepped back, placing Derren in front of me. “I don’t think so.”
“Leave me out of this.” Derren, my human shield, sidestepped. “Why do women always have to go for the balls, man?” Derren asked Lix.
“Because they’re nuts,” Lix replied, smiling at his own pun.
We were outside the hotel now. Mentally, I calculated the feet between me and Asher and a locked bathroom door. Asher was still doing his me-no-talk, me-Tarzan-you-Jane thing. I flipped my hair over my shoulder. “Do you think you could calm down enough to talk to me?”
He breathed deep, then held out his hand, an invitation to continue. I guess he was still too upset to form words, let alone a coherent sentence. “I know you wanted me to call you when I was done at the bar.”
“Didn’t want you to, ordered you to,” he said in a low voice. So the man could speak. Funny, I don’t know where Ash got the idea I was the type of girl to take orders. I decided to handle this calmly. Be the bigger person. Because I loved Ash. I forgave him for his man-trum. I wanted to salvage the night, or early morning, as it was. I’d explain how the dinner with his parents affected me, and then I’d tell Ash I loved him. All would be well, and we’d ride off into the sunset together on matching Pegasuses.
I smiled to soften the blow. “As mentioned earlier, I don’t really take orders Asher. You asked me to call you. I fully intended to. But time got away from me and Porter—”
“Fucking hell, I’m not talking about this out here in front of the peanut gallery.” I’d forgotten about Derren and Lix.
I sucked in a breath. He strode past me, pushing open one of the double doors leading into the hotel. I trudged behind him. Lix and Derren followed. Through the gleaming white tiled lobby, we went, skirting past exotic flowers artfully arranged in huge vases. At the bank of elevators, Ash punched the up button. Double steel doors sprung open. Ash motioned for me to go first. I complied. When Lix and Derren moved to join us, Ash pushed them both back over the threshold. “Get the next one.” Both appeared mortally outraged.
Just as the doors slid shut, I finger waved at them. “Night boys.”
Alone, we stared at each other, chests rising with heavy breaths. I became all too aware of the small space. If I just leaned forward, I’d be touching Ash. That invisible spark that always existed between us lit again and ignited to flame.
“Truce?” My nipples pebbled. I crossed my arms. Didn’t want the damn man to think I was actually turned on. In our relationship, fighting was foreplay.
The elevator began its climb. “You done going for my balls?”
“You done with your tantrum?” I volleyed back.
He nodded.
I did too.
Ah, we’d reached a ceasefire.
His lips pressed tightly together. I waited for him to gather his thoughts, for the apology that was sure to come. After he groveled at my feet for a sufficient amount of time, I’d graciously forgive him for his descent into temporary Neanderthalism. We’d have make-up sex, one of my favorites. I’d tell him I loved him while he was inside me. At which point, he would weep his unworthiness and thanks and tell me he loved me back.
“Didn’t like seeing you with that guy,” he said. “Didn’t like it all.” Whoa, that didn’t sound like an apology. Ash pounded the emergency stop button. The elevator screeched to a halt. He cornered me, using his size again to keep me where he wanted. But this time I didn’t mind. His hand skirted down my neck, his nose bumped mine. “Fucking hated seeing him all over you. That what you need, Lily? Some smart prick to shoot the shit with?”
His words broke through my haze. “What? No—” I need you. Only you. The words lodged in my throat as Ash’s cock pressed against my stomach. What was happening was inevitable; we fought, then we fucked. We communicated best this way. Everything I couldn’t say manifested in touches, in moans, and sighs of pleasure. My nether regions tightened with anticipation. The elevator had a glass wall overlooking the dark beach and even darker ocean. The moon was just a hangnail in the sky. Dim emergency lighting had come on in the elevator.
“What are you doing?” I asked, though I had already guessed. We were moving on to the making-up part sans apology. No problem; I could be very flexible.
In answer, he slid his hand down my back, drawing me firmly against him. Then his mouth covered mine. I parted my lips, our tongues touching. That’s all I needed, one kiss and I ignited. I rocked my hips, rubbing myself against his erection. Of its own accord, my head tilted, inviting Asher’s lips to taste the flesh there. He swore, and then his mouth was there, licking, sucking, biting. My eyes were half-lidded. Over his shoulder, I watched the tide come in on the beach, the waves gently lapping. A couple strolled along the water. Could they see us? Did they know what we were doing? My blood ran feverish. His teeth scraped the sensitive skin on my collarbone making me moan. His hand inched down, cupping my ass.
I went up on my tippy toes to loop my arms around his neck. Ash moved, pressing me into the corner. Now both hands were on my ass, lifting me. My legs wrapped around his waist. He groaned. And it was the best sound. His desire drove my own. We kissed. A hand left my ass to cup my neck. The hard length of his cock rubbed against the seam of my shorts, the friction driving me to new heights. I could come this way.
He stepped back, and my legs released from his waist. His hands fumbled with his zipper, then mine. A clever hand dipped beneath my panties. His finger stroked my core. I was so wet. So ready. It never took much with Asher to get me going. One hot look. A dirty word. A simple kiss.
“Asher.”
“Fuck, sweetheart. You’re wet for me, aren’t you? You like slumming it with me, don’t you? Is that what turns you on? You could have some smart prick, but you like the dirty rockers.”
A small fissure of unease split deep within. But then Asher’s finger pressed inside of me, and I gave in to the physical sensations. The emotional stuff could wait. All that mattered was the need building like a coiled snake inside of me. A bar ran the length of the elevator. I gripped it and opened my legs as wide as they could go given the hand down my pants, and that my shorts and panties were still on.
“That’s it. Take what your man is giving you.” My breath came in uneven pants as he stroked. Ash was a gen
ius at the guitar, and this easily translated to how he handled women. He played me. His finger hooked, finding that tight bud inside my channel. He pressed and stroked.
My body buzzed.
My back bowed.
I came with a shout. For a moment I floated. My whole body felt warm and fuzzy. Strong hands turned me. My haze faded. Oh, it was Ash’s turn. I could see his reflection in the dark glass window. He was busy pulling down his pants, dark gaze fixed on me the whole time. He had a monster of a hard-on. Wetness pooled between my legs. He smoothed a hand up my back, urging me down. Ash liked sex all ways. Position usually didn’t matter to him, though I did notice he was partial to mirrors and doggy style. The dirty little voyeur. I liked it too. Doesn’t everyone have a little peeping Tom inside of them? Shorts and underwear were peeled down my legs.
He grabbed my hips to his waiting mouth. His tongue licked greedily. I squirmed. His hands wrapped around my thighs, keeping still and steady. What sweet torture. His tongue flattened, dragging through my sex. I watched him in the glass. A hand left my thigh. Oh my, he was touching himself, stroking his thick member while he ate me out. My tummy tingled and tightened. So close. I was so close. A bite, a nip. He hadn’t shaved in a couple days and the rough scruff against my thighs had me going wild. I bucked. He flicked his tongue back and forth across my clit. So much better than any battery-operated boyfriend I’d ever had. I couldn’t take it any longer. My whole body released.
“Fuck. Asher.”
He stood, a triumphant smirk on his face. Wiping his mouth, he lined up behind me. He hooked an arm, positioned the blunt head of his cock at my entrance, and pressed in. He moved slow. “You like this don’t you? You like watching me fuck you,” he murmured, working his cock inside of me.
“Yes.” I tilted my hips up, urging him to go deeper, faster.
Palming my ass, he chuckled, low down and dirty. “Greedy girl.”
He surged forward, burying his face in my neck. I gasped on the sudden intrusion. Ah, that’s what I wanted: him locked so deep inside of me you couldn’t tell where he began and I ended. I sighed in pleasure. He moaned, thrusting. Asher, he fucked me so good, so sweet. He bit into my shoulder and at the same time, his fingers found my sex again, rubbing and drawing one last bone-melting orgasm from me.
“Yes,” I panted. “There. Please.”
A familiar tension spread through me. I came again with a shudder. Ash followed behind me, driving deep, then pulling out at the very last second. He came all over my back. I stayed bent over for a moment, letting precious air fill my lungs, willing the world to stop spinning. I grinned like a fool. I stood, loose limbed and blissed out. Pulling on my shorts, I was reminded of the sticky mess Ash had left on my back.
“You didn’t use a condom.” It was the first time we hadn’t used protection.
He ran a hand through his short hair. “Fuck. Sorry.” He buttoned up his jeans.
“It’s okay. I’m clean.” Asher didn’t say anything. He gazed out the window. What he could be thinking about so intently, I couldn’t possibly know. “This is usually the part where you reassure me that you’re clean too.”
“What?” His eyes locked on me. “Of course I’m clean.”
His pants pocket buzzed. He dug around his back pocket and produced his cell. When he saw the screen, he frowned. “Miss Americana is playing at a bar down the street. Jay,” their slimy lead guitarist with a silver front tooth, “is passed out. They need a lead guitar.”
“You’re leaving?” my voice sounded small, tinny. I couldn’t reconcile the explosive sex we’d just had with Ash’s desire to ditch me. An invisible hand wrapped around my heart and squeezed.
He repocketed his phone. “Might be good exposure.” He hit a button on the elevator panel. The lights clicked on and it started to move. Ash had never been concerned about the band’s success before. Unlike his brother, who zealously sought the top of the charts, all Asher wanted to do was play music. The elevator pinged. The doors slid open on our floor. I stared expectantly at Ash. “You want to come?” he asked. It totally sounded like he wanted me to go with him. Not.
Our relationship was changing too fast, and I couldn’t keep up with it. What had happened between dinner with Ash’s parents and now? One thing I did know for certain was that I didn’t go where I wasn’t wanted. Ash held the elevator door open, clearly waiting for me to exit.
Strangely calm, I said. “No. I’m tired.”
Ash dipped his head. “All right.”
I stepped off the elevator, paused, and turned back to my broody guitarist. Unsure, I asked, “Everything okay?”
He looked away, then back, his face guarded. “Everything’s fine.” Quick fact, ninety-three percent of the time when a person says everything is fine, they are lying. “Just thought it might be good to get out, have some fun. I’ll catch up with you later.”
I tilted my head, missing something.
“Ash,” I said.
“Fuck. I’m sorry, Lily. I didn’t mean—”
The elevator doors slid shut. He didn’t move to stop them. I stood there for a while, the words he’d said turning over and over in my head, gathering the strength and speed of a hurricane. They seemed eerily familiar. I didn’t figure it out until I was in the shower washing the night off of me. I’d said almost the exact same thing to him earlier. Get out. Have some fun. See you later. I went to bed confused and a little heartbroken. Was this what love felt like? Strange and foreign. My partner was unhappy. I had a hunch why. And I was the root of it. But I couldn’t figure out how to fix it. I was inexperienced in relationships.
In the end, foolish pride won out. What can I say? I was young and so immature. What had Asher said before leaving me outside the bar? Fuck. This. I loved Asher, but I sure as hell wasn’t going to beg.
In the wee hours of the morning, I heard the door to our hotel room open and quietly snick shut. Rustling, then the bed dipped with Asher’s weight. I feigned sleep. Isn’t that what most animals did when they’re scared? Hide and pretend the threat doesn’t exist? Things were falling apart, and my hands couldn’t hold all the pieces. Soon enough the room echoed with Ash’s soft snores. A shiver ran through me. We were ending and we hadn’t even begun.
Now
“So are you speaking to me today?”
I pursed my lips, focused on Addy. She sat across from me at a table laid out with a veritable feast. Warren had ordered breakfast that morning before leaving with the band to do some press. He’d selected one of everything from the menu. No chance his pregnant wife would go hungry. The baby had gotten so big though, that Addy’s stomach was being nearly crushed by her uterus. She ate all day, but small meals. No way she could finish this much food. That left me to take up the slack. No problem.
“I don’t know,” I murmured, picking at a cheese Danish.
Some tribes punished by ostracism, their way of maintaining social order. I’d taken up a similar banner, going nearly twelve hours scarcely speaking to my best friend. This had proved most difficult, considering we were sharing a two-bedroom suite and I loved the shit out of her. Though we lived in different states, we texted hourly and phoned almost as much. When Addy hurt, I hurt. Still, I wasn’t ready to let my epic pout end just yet.
“Hmm,” Addy hummed. She tapped her fingers against the table, the sound muffled by the crisp white tablecloth. The record label had gone all out, booking an entire floor of rooms in a posh hotel at the heart of London. The living room was big, with lots of overstuffed couches in shades of gray. A mirrored bar sat in the corner, overcrowded with all sorts of bottles. I gazed outside. The weather was fine. Not a cloud in the sky. Way below, a red double-decker bus zoomed by. So many wonderful museums were footsteps from our door. My skin felt positively itchy. Two pieces of paper were shoved beneath my nose. “Here.” More waving of paper. “C’mon, Lil. Take them.”
I snatched the items from Addy just to get them out of my face. Not that I was interested or anything. Wouldn
’t hurt to take a peek though. “Oh.” My heart did a funny flip in my chest. VIP tickets to the Tate Modern, including a private tour and Michelin-star dining experience. Art and food, my two favorite things. Smooth move, Addy. I slid them away from me, turning up my nose. “Are you trying to buy my forgiveness?” I did my best impression of outrage.
“Of course not.” Her turn to do her best impression of outrage. “I know you could never be bought. I’d never insult you like that. I respect you far too much. I just thought you might like to spend the day out followed by an evening of fine dining. My motives were purely innocent, I assure you.”
“Still, I can’t accept,” I sniffed.
She made a frustrated noise. “I said I was sorry.”
“I vaguely remember an apology, but I couldn’t quite hear you over all the laughing.” Ash and I spent the rest of the flight to London locked in the cabin. In between kisses, we watched movies. He didn’t take off his pants. I didn’t remove my robe. Things stayed strictly PG.
Despite this, when the door of the cabin finally unlocked, we’d been caught in a less-than-flattering position. It didn’t look good. The whole band plus some assistants witnessed me flagrante delicto, including Kelly, whom I was seriously considering as a backup should things go kaput with Ash. Not that I was contemplating getting into a relationship with Ash again. Denial, thy name was Lily. I wasn’t any smarter now. We’d landed squarely in the past, where everything was physical.
Big, overdramatic sigh from Addy. “Guess I’ll have to rip these up then.” She fingered the tickets.
My hand came down atop hers. “Be a shame to waste them.”
She pulled her arm back. “A damn shame.”
“Doesn’t mean I forgive you.”
Bad Rules Page 13