“Hey, do you want to hold him?” he asked me.
“Yes, I want to hold him.” I beamed.
“You feel asleep as soon as the nurse laid him on your chest, so let me fill you in. At birth he weighed seven pounds and five ounces, and he was nineteen inches long,” he said, handing him to me.
He was perfect, I thought as I counted his little fingers and toes. He had a head full of curly hair, and I wasn’t trying to toot my own horn, but he looked just like his mommy.
“He’s perfect, Qua,” I said, then kissed his little cheeks.
Qua didn’t want to name the baby after himself, so we had picked the name Chase Jamar Moore, but let me go on the record by saying his daddy named him. If it had been left up to me, I would have named him Quameek, after his damn daddy. I still felt some pain, so I handed the baby back to Qua, and he placed him in the bassinet so the nurse could come and get him. Being that Qua’s mom was staying at the house, Qua wasn’t going to stay the night with me at the hospital, so I had requested that the baby sleep in the nursery. I was still tired and didn’t want to drop him. After Qua left for the night, I called April and spoke to her for a while, giving her all the info on her godson and sending her a picture. Then I nodded off.
* * *
The nurse came into my room at 8:00 a.m. the next morning to tell me that Chase was being circumcised this morning and she would bring him to me for feeding as soon as he was done. I tried to get a few more hours of sleep in. I knew I was going to get a lot of visitors today, because Chanel and Desi didn’t make it to the hospital yesterday. Ty’s scary ass had stayed in the lobby during the delivery, so he had called me last night and had said that he would be back up here today to see his bigheaded nephew. I’d told him he held the title of bighead, so he could not pass it on to my son. I wished my dad was here to see my li’l man, but I knew he was looking down and smiling at his baby girl for bringing such a handsome baby into the world.
I enjoyed all the visits that day, but after visiting hours ended, I was beat again. Chase was cranky after being circumcised, so Qua decided to stay the night. I was being discharged in the morning, so he dropped his mother back off at the house and came back with the clothes I needed to go home in. I had worn my slippers to the hospital, so he brought me my sneakers, as well as a sweat suit.
Chapter Fifty-Three
Jakiyah
I’d been home from the hospital for two weeks, and when I tell you Qua and I were worn out, you wouldn’t even believe me. Who would think that a two-week-old would be so much work? But it was true. My baby was a big ole crybaby. If I didn’t know any better, I would think he didn’t like me or Qua, since all his little ass did was cry, no matter how many attempts were made to quiet him down. I had expected motherhood to resemble the time I’d spent caring for baby Andrea, but nope, he was giving me hell.
I was upstairs getting dressed. I had already dressed him for his two-week checkup, and he was downstairs, giving Qua the business. I swear, I was going to miss Qua when he went back to work next week. I was going to be stuck with the little nightmare all by myself. I had tried to tell Qua to tell his mother not to sit and hold the baby when he was sleeping and not to pick him up every time he cried, because now she was gone, and we were left to deal with this spoiled little boy who never wanted to be put down. When I got downstairs, I saw Qua struggling with him. Chase was having a fit right now, screaming at the top of his lungs. It made me laugh.
“Don’t just stand there. Take your damn son,” he said, then handed him to me.
“So now he’s my son, but when I was telling you to tell your mom not to spoil him, you paid my ass no mind.”
“I’ll be in the car,” he barked. He grabbed the baby bag and his car seat before leaving.
I didn’t know why he was upset with me because we had a little demon baby who was giving both of us the business. I wrapped Chase in his blanket and headed out the door, giving myself a pep talk not to go off on his ass for being rude.
The doctor said that Chase was fine, and it pissed me off that this little boy didn’t cry one time at the doctor’s office, making it look like we were exaggerating about our baby’s behavior, given that we were new parents. I swear, I wanted to pinch his ass now that he was sleeping so peacefully, basically making us look like liars.
When we got back to the car, Qua took him from me to put him into the car seat, and I got in the car, thankful that he was sleeping.
“Babe, I’m sorry for snapping at you earlier,” Qua said, apologizing, once he was in the car.
“Qua, Chase is driving me crazy too, but we can’t take it out on each other,” I told him.
“I know, babe, but his little ass had me tight.” He laughed.
“But did you see how he played us and didn’t cry one time in front of the doctor?”
We laughed.
Once we got back to the house, Chase was still sleeping, so I went into the kitchen to take something out for dinner and fix us some lunch. Qua said that he needed to talk to me about something, and I just hoped that it didn’t end up with us arguing. I took a deep breath as I sat down at the table after fixing our plates. I prayed that I took whatever he needed to say in stride.
“So, what’s up?” I asked him.
“Keem wants to come and see the baby,” he blurted out.
I had to take a few minutes because I didn’t want whatever I said to come out the wrong way, and I had to think about the conversation that we had recently had. I mean, if Keem were to come over, I could stay upstairs, in my bedroom, since I was not ready to talk to him or see him right now.
“Qua, if you want him to come and see Chase, I’m okay with it,” I said, not believing the words that were coming out of my mouth.
“Are you serious?” he asked in disbelief.
I knew he didn’t expect me to say that it would be okay, because I was stuck on blaming Keem, but after our last argument, Qua had made me realize that I couldn’t blame him for how Yessenia had chosen to handle the situation. I never agreed with Qua, but he was right when he said that Keem was guilty only of cheating on her. He didn’t put the gun in her hand.
“I’m serious, Qua, but I don’t know if I’m ready to be in his presence right now. I could stay upstairs when he comes by,” I said, being truthful.
“I understand, and thank you for doing this, and if you’re not ready to see him, I’m sure he’ll understand,” he said.
After we finished eating, I went to tend to Chase, who had just woken up. I was in the kitchen, fixing him a bottle, when someone rang the doorbell. I didn’t think that Qua had meant that Keem was coming over today, as in now. I was stuck in the damn kitchen, which meant I would have to see him to get back upstairs to Chase. I wished Qua had back stairs like my mother had at her house, as that would work perfectly right now.
I tried to listen to see who entered the house. Maybe it wasn’t Keem, I thought, but then I heard his deep voice. So now I was standing against the refrigerator, trying to figure out how the hell I was going to get out of here without having to see him. I promise you, I was ready for this awkward moment and would force myself to respond to him if he said anything to me. I wished I had my phone with me. I would have called Qua to tell him that I was stuck in the kitchen. I heard him go upstairs to get the baby, so I had to put my big girl panties on and come out of the kitchen. I walked out of the kitchen, and Keem was sitting on the couch, his back to me. I thought about sneaking by him, but then, that would be petty and childish, so I made my presence known.
“How are you doing, Keem?” I asked, causing him to turn around. He was shocked that I had spoken to him, and it showed on his face.
“I’m good, Jakiyah. Thanks for having me over,” he said.
“No problem,” I said before walking up the stairs, leaving it at that.
But it was a start, and I was proud of myself.
Chapter Fifty-Four
Qua
“Yo, I ain’t never been so damn
nervous in my life. Your damn girl scares me,” Keem joked.
“It’s all love. You know she’ll come around sooner or later,” I told him.
“Nah. I didn’t expect her to even speak to my ass, so it’s all good.”
I just hoped that she came around, because now that Keem was going to be a part of the wedding, he was going to be around quite a bit. We had decided that we were going to get married on January 15, which was, like, a month and a half away, so we had to get on the ball with the planning. I heard Chase upstairs, having a fit again, and I was about to tell Jakiyah to bring him to me, but nothing I did stopped him from crying. I chilled with Keem for about another hour, before he headed out. Then I got right on the phone and called my mother to tell her what was going on with Chase, that no matter what we tried, it didn’t work. I wanted to tell her that Jakiyah had said that she needed to come back, because she was the one who had spoiled his little behind, but I didn’t. All she would have said was that there was no such thing as a spoiled baby.
My mother told me that when he got the way he’d been getting, I should lay him on my chest and rub his back, and that should work. She also said that if that didn’t work, I should lay him on his stomach and rub his behind or his back until he quieted down. I was starting to really think that my baby had colic, because when I googled “a crying baby” some of the symptoms fit, but the doctor had said that he was fine and that if he had colic, there wouldn’t be no in-between crying.
After I hung up with my mother, I went upstairs and took Chase from Jakiyah, who looked frustrated. I lay on my back and put the baby on my chest and started to rub his back, and I’d be damned if he didn’t stop crying. Jakiyah looked at me with a smile on her face. I whispered to her to thank my mom, as she was the one who had told me to do this. I lay there for about ten minutes, and when I noticed that Chase was asleep, I gently got up off the bed with him and took him to his room and placed him in the crib. I waited a few minutes, just to make sure that he didn’t wake up, before rejoining Jakiyah in the bedroom.
“Some peace and quiet, and it feels good,” I said, plopping down on the bed, next to her. “Thanks for not treating Keem the way I thought you would upon seeing him,” I added, then kissed her on the lips.
“I just wish that you had told me that he was going to come to the house today,” she said.
“Yeah, when I asked you, he had already said that he wanted to stop by when he got off work. So when you said it was okay, I sent him a text letting him know that it was okay. You know, we have to start planning this wedding. We don’t have that much time to plan.”
“I know. That’s why I let Chanel and Desi know that they need to come by one day this week so that we can start with the planning. I also want to hire a planner. I don’t think that the three of us will be able to pull it off on our own in the short time that we have.”
“Once you come up with the color scheme, that’s when I’ll get my dudes on board as far as our tuxedos are concerned, because we don’t have much to do. The biggest thing for us is them planning my bachelor’s party. I can’t wait to get my freak on with the strippers,” I joked.
“Yeah, okay. Die before you even walk down the aisle, if you want to,” she said, cutting her eyes at me.
I scooped her up, pulled her into my arms, hugged her, and kissed her on her lips as I whispered in her ear, asking her if she was ready to be my wife.
“I’m more than ready,” she said, kissing me on the lips and slipping her tongue in my mouth.
“Girl, you about to start something you know your ass can’t finish, so I’m going to need you to fall back,” I told her because she had my dick hard as hell knowing I can’t tap that ass.
“No, you can’t tap this ass, but there is something that I could do to take care of all of this,” she said, reaching inside of my shorts and boxers pulling my dick out and putting it in her mouth.
I laid back and let her do her thing as my toes curled, causing me to grab the back of her head as I pumped in and out of her mouth. Chase must have known some shit was going down because once again he was screaming at the top of his lungs stopping my damn action as Jakiyah rushed into the bathroom and I went to pick his ass up. Fucking around with Chase ass I was going to keep a damn dry dick I thought as I picked his little crying ass up.
Chapter Fifty-Five
Qua
I was home alone today with the baby because Jakiyah, Chanel, and Desi were out picking up their dresses. Me and my dudes had got our tuxedos last weekend. Jakiyah had decided that she wanted the men in white tuxedos with turquoise shirts. At first I wasn’t feeling it, but then I tried the shit on, and a nigga looked good. The bridesmaids were going to be in turquoise dresses, and Jakiyah was sticking with traditional white. To be honest, I didn’t care what she walked down the aisle wearing, just as long as she was going to be my wife. I really couldn’t believe how fast this day was coming: I really couldn’t believe that next Saturday I was going to be a married man with a son. When we first met, I knew that Jakiyah was the woman that I wanted to marry. Although we had separated, our fate couldn’t be denied, and Saturday would be the proof of that.
I was still a little upset with my father, although I didn’t speak about it. The fact that he had not shown up when Jakiyah had the baby really bothered me. I knew it had had something to do with his wife, but I just felt as a man, he should have taken a stand, and if still she hadn’t wanted to come, he should have been here. I had still extended to him an invitation to my wedding, and if he chose not to come, then he didn’t ever have to worry about me inviting him to anything else of mine. He had assured me that he would be here, but only time would tell. I wasn’t going to stress myself out about this.
Anyway, my mother and Donavon were going to be there without a doubt. If my mom and my brother showed up, I was good, because we needed my mother to be there for the demon baby. I prayed that Chase would be good at the wedding. I’m not going to lie. he had gotten much better. He didn’t cry as much. However, he always wanted to be in either my arms or Jakiyah’s arms, like the spoiled little baby he was. He didn’t give Jakiyah’s mom any problems, so I didn’t know what his deal was with me and Jakiyah. Chase had to know somehow that Jakiyah and I were new at this parent thing: if he did not give her mother or my mother any problems, he must be trying to play us.
Jakiyah got back to the house later, all smiles as she came to sit next to me on the couch.
“What you smiling about?” I asked her.
“Today was a great day. I can’t wait for you to see my dress. I’m so excited right now and can’t believe that this is really about to happen.” She was beaming even more now.
“Well, let’s not wait. Let me see the dress now,” I told her.
“Why, I knew you was going to say some shit like that. That’s why I’m keeping my dress at my mother’s house.” She laughed. “So how was Chase today?” she asked.
“He was a good boy for his daddy, only flipping out on me one time, but I laid the spank down on his Pamper, and he got his act right,” I joked.
“Yeah, okay. He knows he’s the boss up in here,” she said, getting up, probably to go wake his little ass up.
* * *
The next night we packed Chase’s bag with everything he would need to be with his grandmother for the night. He was staying over at his grandmother’s because tonight was the night I was hanging out with my dudes and Jakiyah was hanging out with the ladies. April was here, and she had planned something for Jakiyah tonight, but she wasn’t telling me what that was. I had joked about crashing her little get-together, but I had only been bullshitting. I had let her know that me and the guys were going to Cheetahs Gentlemen’s Club, thinking she was going to tell me what they had planned, but it had backfired and she hadn’t told me anything.
After dropping the baby off and returning home, Jakiyah and I hugged and told each other to behave tonight. Then I left and headed over to Keem’s spot, where we were all meeting u
p. When we got to the club, Keem had shit looking right. We sat around drinking and enjoying ourselves, and I was praying that he didn’t have no damn special dance set up. That thinking right there let me know that I was ready to be married. But knowing Keem, I should have known that he was up to no good.
At some point two females approached and asked who the lucky man was who was getting married. I’m not going to lie. Both of them were some bad bitches. I sat back and let them do their thing, keeping my hands to myself. The Dominican chick was a bold one as she gyrated her body up and down mine and whispered in my ear, asking if I wanted a private dance. I kindly declined. She wasn’t about to get my ass caught up, because I had plans to marry Jakiyah, and nothing was going to mess that up. I was tipsy, but I wasn’t that damn tipsy. And I didn’t go overboard with the liquor, because so many dudes drank too much and fucked around and got drunk and had that one last fuck. But it wasn’t going to be happening to my ass.
We left the club at closing, which was at 4:00 a.m., and my ass was staggering just a little. When Keem dropped me off at home and I went inside, I discovered that my boo was waiting on me to make it home. Let’s just say that my ass wasn’t that tipsy, because I made love to her and couldn’t wait until we were husband and wife. After we showered, we both collapsed. We had to go to pick Chase up in a few hours, so that was enough to warrant some sleep.
He Used to Love Me Page 22