Now that she was awake, she couldn’t stop thinking about Aaron, and it was driving her mad. She wasn’t this woman. She was an independent, self-sufficient, capable woman. She didn’t need a man. But when Aaron had said she was incredibly beautiful, she’d come very close to needing him. Realizing that he really did find her attractive had made her feel like a desirable woman for the first time in years, and there was no denying that the feeling could become addictive.
As could the sensation of being kissed by him. Very addictive indeed.
Men had told her mother she was beautiful. It was situation normal for her. Did her mother experience the same knee-trembling response that she’d felt last night? Was that why she’d wanted to put herself in the position to experience it time and time again? Was it a compulsion that she couldn’t control? Was she, in fact, just like any other type of addict?
Because if that were true, it would go some small way toward explaining why she used to flirt at every opportunity. Even as a young child, Jasmine had been aware of her mother’s lack of commitment to her father, and it had distressed her. But if her mother had been helpless to modify her behavior, which she was beginning to believe might have been the case, then maybe it was time to stop being so angry with her?
After two day shifts, the night shifts dragged for Jasmine. The crew was called out twice on the first night for minor incidents, and on the second they had a call-out that involved dealing with a tanker rollover on the highway and the resultant hazardous spillage. At the end of the shift rotation, while she was at her locker, Dave and Aaron walked in, laughing.
She took the opportunity to look at Aaron. Something had changed. They hadn’t spoken about the night of the party, but she’d noticed a subtle shift in the way he interacted with her. All business. No mention of the way they’d left things between them after the party at Tony’s club.
No little digs, no jokes at her expense.
All business was what she wanted, of course. It was just—
“Well, mate,” Dave said, “enjoy your hot date tonight.”
Aaron flicked her a glance, then said a subdued, “Yeah, thanks.”
“Hot date?” Kane said as he joined them. “For Aaron? What’s new? And who’s the lucky woman tonight?”
“Name’s Melinda. She’s a chef,” Dave said. “She’s going to cook for him at her place, amongst other things, I guess.”
“Nice.”
Jasmine closed her locker door with more force than necessary. All three of her colleagues turned to look at her.
Dave was the first to break the silence. “Problem, Mac?”
“No.” Her throat felt as if she’d swallowed something with sharp edges. She picked up her bag and swung it onto her shoulder, then coughed and tried again. “No problem here at all. See you all next shift.”
She avoided meeting Aaron’s eyes. She knew she wouldn’t be able to hide the emotion she was feeling. She couldn’t put a name to that emotion, but one thing was for sure: It felt very much like jealousy. And if that was the case, more fool her.
She hadn’t just lost her marbles, she’d given them away.
“Jasmine, wait!”
Sighing when she heard Aaron’s voice behind her just as she reached her car, she took a moment to straighten her face before turning. “What?”
“Are you okay?”
“Why the heck shouldn’t I be?”
He pushed a hand through his hair. “I’m sorry you had to hear that, but you know Dave once he gets his teeth into a subject…” He shrugged.
She licked her dry lips. “I’ve heard you talk about women before—why should it bother me now? It’s not as if anything’s changed. I couldn’t care less what you do in your downtime, and I’ve got better things to do than stand around here.” She unlocked the car and tossed her bag into the back.
“Have a great time tonight,” she said as she got into the driver’s seat. She didn’t mean it, of course, but if she’d said anything else…well, it was better to keep quiet and let him think she was an idiot, than to tell him what she really meant, and confirm it.
He grimaced and held on to the driver’s door, preventing her from closing it on him. “I made it up.”
“I don’t understand. Made what up?”
“The date. The whole Melinda thing. Dave wouldn’t stop; he wouldn’t believe that I didn’t have plans. He thought I was hiding something juicy when I said I was just going to stay home.”
She shook her head, puzzled. “So, you told him a story about some random woman.”
“Yes.” He shrugged.
“Have you done that before? Manufactured a date rather than tell the truth and risk looking like a normal person?”
It was his turn to look puzzled. “I might have…embellished things a little. Sometimes.”
She hid her small smile by turning away to locate the ignition with her key.
“I just wanted you to know before you left,” he said, sounding unsure of himself, “about Melinda.”
“Thanks, but like I said, it doesn’t matter to me.”
She clicked in her seat belt and signaled that she wanted to close the door. He stepped aside and when she checked her mirror before turning out of the car park, he was still standing there.
She wouldn’t let his revelation change her opinion of him, she told herself as she drove away. It didn’t alter the fact that Aaron was all wrong for her. He was still a playboy first and foremost. The glimpses she’d had of the man he could be were distracting, but irrelevant.
…
Aaron placed his phone and car keys on the coffee table in front of him and sat on his sofa, staring at the two objects as if trying to memorize them for one of those games where he’d have to name the missing item. Not that it would be tough with only two objects to choose from. He was staring at them in a bid to overcome the urge to either ring Jasmine, or to drive across town to her house. He glanced at his watch. Nearly midnight. Too late to do either. So, stop thinking about it.
He stretched his arms along the back of the sofa and let his head flop against the cushion behind him. He was home from his impromptu, solitary trip to the cinema, and staring at a long night alone. Dave would laugh his head off if he knew the truth.
The movie had been very long and extremely boring. The only interesting bits were when his concentration had wandered and he’d caught himself thinking about Jasmine. Like an untrained dog on a leash, his brain had needed jerking back into place, over and over.
His night out with Jasmine at Tony’s party had been much more enjoyable—heck, laying tiles with her nearby had been more fun than the evening he’d just had.
Maybe he should have called Melinda after all.
Melinda was perfect for him. Not only did she have everything he could want in the looks department, but she was only interested in one night with him to satisfy her curiosity, after which she would move on to some other lucky guy.
Jasmine, on the other hand, was so far from perfect it was like a bad joke. She also had everything he could want in the looks department, but more than that, she was someone he liked and respected. Unlike Melinda, though, she didn’t want him. She was the one woman he’d known as an adult that he would never be able to charm, but she did strange things to him.
He let out a breath that hurt like a stitch in his side.
She’d sworn she didn’t care at all about him spending time with another woman tonight but…he just didn’t know whether that was the truth.
He did know how he’d feel if she announced that she was going on a date, and the intensity of that sentiment shocked and scared him. He was even jealous of any men who might be in her past, but that didn’t stop him wondering about them. Liz had mentioned someone called Craig, and he wanted to know what had happened with Craig to make her so wary of men.
Or was she just born that way?
Either way, he wanted to be the one to break through that reserve and… No, he couldn’t think about being the one. H
e needed to focus on how impossible it was to enter into a relationship with Jasmine, even if it was becoming more and more difficult to remember why. Obviously, logic was no longer going to help him. If he looked at his situation logically, he’d run away from her, not toward her. Yet, he hadn’t…and after tonight, he couldn’t see that happening.
He’d resisted asking any woman to take him seriously until now, so what had changed? All that thinking about values and guiding principles and whatever had messed with his mind. He had to admit one thing…keeping women at arm’s length, protecting himself by not getting close, avoiding commitment…none of it had made him happy. He put on a good act. He laughed and joked, and acted like he didn’t want someone special, but the truth? The real, down-deep, hidden-from-everyone truth? He was just as lonely as anybody else.
There had to be a better way to live.
He ran a hand around the back of his neck, then eyed the phone and keys again. It was too late tonight, but tomorrow was another day. What he needed was an excuse to see Jasmine again, because if he arrived at her house on an apparent whim, she would send him packing. Probably.
He slapped his palm to his forehead. Of course. Tomorrow was her birthday.
…
“I wouldn’t have thought of you as a picket-fence kind of girl.”
All of the little hairs on the back of Jasmine’s neck stood to attention as they always did when she heard Aaron’s voice. She shaded her eyes from the sun as she looked up into his face from where she was kneeling, sorting pickets into varying lengths. “Har-di-har. What are you doing here?”
He looked over her shoulder at the tiles he’d laid. “I remembered that the tiles still need grouting. That’s part of my job.”
She would have grouted them herself, but…well, it had been easier to start a new job than to continue with one that Aaron had begun and stir up all the memories better left unstirred. Not that she would have left them forever. The tiles, not the memories.
“I promised I’d do the job, and I keep my promises.”
She got to her feet before saying, “Not all of your promises, you don’t. You promised no kissing on the night of the party.”
He flinched. “I owe you an apology for what happened in the car.”
“Yes, you do, actually. I wondered when you’d get around to it.”
He hesitated. “You did have a good time, though? Up until the very end of the evening?”
“Yes, I told you I did.” She’d enjoyed the kiss as well, but she chose not to share that information with him. It would only spoil the effect of the apology. “I’ll probably go dancing again sometime soon.”
“Who with?”
She narrowed her eyes at the sharpness of his tone. She hadn’t actually thought that far ahead. Sasha was the most likely candidate, if she ever had a free night, but Aaron didn’t need to know that, did he?
“It’s really none of your business.”
“No. Sorry.” After a brief pause, he said, “But—” Then closed his mouth as if he’d thought better of what he was going to say. “Anyway, there’s another reason I came over today.”
“Go on.”
He took a hand from behind his back and held out a bunch of flowers. Bright, cheerful daisy types. “Happy birthday, Jasmine.”
Was it wrong that the cement block in her chest had lightened at the thought that he’d remembered her birthday? Probably, but heck, she couldn’t remember the last time anyone had bought her flowers.
“Thank you.” She reached for them, her trembling fingers accidentally brushing his as she took them from him and triggering an avalanche of dizzying sensations.
“You’re welcome. I’d better get started then.” He nodded toward the porch, then pulled his black sweater over his head.
Jasmine gazed at him for several seconds. She might as well accept his help, since he was here—and not just because he looked so good it made her heart squeeze. “My dad and Mitch are coming over to help with the fence. They’ll be here soon. I’m just getting everything ready before they arrive.”
“Oh? Is that a problem?”
“Why should it be?”
“Because you don’t like people helping. You like to do everything yourself.”
She shrugged. “That’s true. Or rather, that was true. But they want to help and I decided…well, why not?”
“I’m glad,” he said, smiling.
“Why?”
“I just think it’s great that you’re letting them help. Shall I do some of this sorting too, so that it’s all ready to go when they get here?”
“If you like. I’ll take these flowers inside first and put them in water.”
They worked well together, anticipating what the other was going to do and collaborating without the need for words. Just like they did at work, except that at work they didn’t normally have to operate in such close proximity. Here, she was acutely aware of how near he was, even more so when she had to reach past him for a picket.
“So…is it Sam?”
“Is what Sam?” She looked up, frowning.
“Is he the one you’re going dancing with?”
She didn’t answer.
“It’s not Tony, is it?”
“What part of none of your business do you not understand?” She ducked her head to hide the smile that twitched on her lips.
“Right.” She thought he might have given up, but then he said, “It’s just that I know Tony, and I don’t think he’s right for you. How long has it been since you went out on a date?”
She hesitated. “It’s been quite a while.”
“And whoever he was, did he put you off men for life?”
“Something like that.”
“What happened?”
She looked at Aaron. Where was the harm in telling him? It seemed a long time ago now. She exhaled, then turned away. “He was a womanizer through and through. Just like you.”
“No, not like me. The difference is that I’ve only ever dated one woman at a time, even if that time is limited.”
“Limited like a goldfish’s memory.”
“Even so, one woman at a time. Anything else is disrespectful. I do have some standards, you know.”
She made a scoffing sound in her throat. “Well, I was gullible. I didn’t know any better back then. Craig said lots of pretty words—” She stopped abruptly and her face twisted. For one horrible moment she thought she was going to burst into tears, but after a steadying breath or two, she said, “Anyway, when I confronted him about his cheating, he laughed at me.”
Aaron grimaced. “Loser.”
“I’d only known him for a few months. He’d moved here from Queensland and was working with my brother Rob. I couldn’t believe it when he noticed me. I thought all my birthdays had come at once, and he made me feel special. I can’t believe I fell for it, but I did. I let him sweet-talk me into believing we had an exclusive relationship. I fell in love with him and even worse, I started planning the wedding—but only in my head, of course.”
She shrugged. “And then I overheard him chatting up another woman while we were out on a date and he thought I was in the bathroom. When she asked him about me, he told her that I wasn’t important. That was when I realized romance means nothing at all. It certainly doesn’t mean commitment.”
“You’re not still in love with him, are you?”
“No, I’m not.” She frowned. “I’m completely over him.”
“It doesn’t sound like it.”
“I am. I wouldn’t want him now, no matter what he offered. But that doesn’t mean I want to repeat the experience.”
“So, you’re going to let one moron ruin your life?”
She lifted her chin. “It’s not ruined. I’m perfectly happy as a single person.”
After a brief silence, he said, “Me too. And we have some very good single role models. The Lone Ranger, for instance.”
“The Lone Ranger had Tonto.”
“I heard they were just
good friends.”
She blew out a breath. “You’re an idiot.”
“Me? Yeah, okay, I am. And you’re an idiot if you let Craig stop you from enjoying your life, from having fun.”
“I don’t.”
“We’ve already established that you haven’t been living life to the full. If it’s not because of Craig, what’s the reason?”
She didn’t answer, but in her heart she knew that he was right. She’d let Craig’s actions affect her for too long.
Aaron laid the last picket on the pile and stood back to view their handiwork. “All sorted.”
“Yes. Thanks. It shouldn’t take long to put up. I think it will be finished by lunchtime.”
After a pause, he said, “That’s handy. I’m going to take the boat out this afternoon. Fancy coming along? We could have a bite to eat afterward. It could be a birthday celebration.”
She didn’t even know he owned a boat, but then, he did live at the marina, so it made sense that he might. She hadn’t been out on a boat for ages…not since the last fishing holiday with her dad and brothers, and that was a long time ago. It was tempting. But so was spending time with Aaron, and she’d already discovered how easy it was to enjoy that too much. Then she’d spend the ensuing night lurching between anger and the threat of pitiful tears. That was why she’d gone to the timber yard this morning and bought the fence pickets. She’d needed something to focus on other than him.
His smile disappeared, and he looked unsure of himself. Vulnerable. Waiting for her to agree to go out with him.
This is new, she thought. New and interesting. Her heart twisted before righting itself. It seemed completely unlikely that Aaron could be feeling anything like she was, but why else would he try to convince her to go?
How could she say no? Why would she want to?
She cleared her throat. “Okay.”
He gave her a smile that made her light-headed, and the wicked glint in his eyes made her wonder whether she had any chance of surviving this…this…whatever they were starting.
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