by Stone, Jenna
Anna led him over to the fire and helped him sit down again. Quinn and Malcolm were already snoring peacefully beneath their blankets, being completely exhausted from the day’s events. Anna was thankful that she could now be alone to tend Rowan, knowing that he wouldn’t want to reveal any sign of weakness in front of his brothers.
Anna settled herself down next to Rowan and gasped when she saw his face in the firelight. “Rowan,” she whispered, reaching up a trembling hand towards his face.
Rowan looked away, focusing his eyes down at his hands. Anna traced her fingers carefully along the line of his jaw, gently taking his chin between her finger and thumb, tilting his face from side-to-side so that she could look at his injuries.
His upper lip was split open badly on the right side of his face. There was dried blood from a bloody nose crusted to his top lip. Rowan’s nose looked like it had been broken; it was swollen badly, but still straight. There was a nasty gash on his left eyebrow that had left a trail of blood down the side of his face.
Anna reached up a finger and traced it ever so lightly down the bridge of Rowan’s nose, causing his eyes to flicker up at her and then dart away.
“Doona fash…it was broken, but I fixed it already. It’ll heal straight and I’ll be handsome as ever,” Rowan chuckled and then stopped abruptly. Laughing hurt his broken ribs.
Anna’s finger slowly traced the lines of Rowan’s lips, watching the firelight dance off his skin, illuminating his purple bruises. She ran her fingers carefully down his jaw line, her feather light touches exploring his skin. Again, she grasped his chin between her thumb and forefinger, forcing it up so that he would look at her.
Rowan’s eyes met hers to see tears streaming down her cheeks as she examined his face. “Doona cry, sweetheart,” he whispered, reaching up his uninjured right hand to wipe away her tears.
“Thank you, Rowan,” Anna said softly, leaning forward to brush her lips over his. Her kiss was as light as butterfly wings so as not to hurt Rowan further. She caught his hand and held it up between them, examining it in the firelight. He had beautiful, masculine hands. Anna extended each of his fingers carefully. Rowan watched her intently as she checked to see if he had any broken bones. His knuckles were swollen and bloodied. Being that Rowan was left- handed, this was the hand that had taken the brunt of his punches.
Anna brought his hand to her lips and gently kissed each of his knuckles, looking up into his eyes as she did so.
There was a storm brewing in Rowan’s eyes. The intensity that Anna saw in their green depths terrified her. Rowan had fought for her honor, and in doing so, he had exerted a silent decree of possession.
As if reading her mind, Rowan broke the silence, “I wanted tae kill that bastard when I saw him touching you. He’s bloody lucky that I didna.”
Anna knew that Rowan was dead serious. “I’m glad you didn’t. You cannot risk losing your chance at freedom over me,” she said, still holding Rowan’s bruised hand in her own.
“I would risk it, Anna. I would risk anything tae keep ye.”
Rowan’s words hung silently between them for a moment. Rowan had already risked his opportunity to begin a new life, his chance at freedom, and with every step closer to Williamsburg, his chances of capture increased. By now the ship’s register would have been read and the Murray brothers had not been judicious about concealing their identities. If they were found out, they would surely be indentured immediately. The precious hope of freedom and a new life would slip through their grasps.
“We could leave now, Anna. They’d never find us,” Rowan whispered, heart thudding anxiously in his chest. He was surprised that he had even uttered the words that he had worked so hard to repress.
Anna’s breath caught in her throat. She had denied her feelings for Rowan, pushed them away and fought them despite knowing that he was what her heart wanted. She had tried to tell herself that it was merely lust that attracted her to Rowan Murray, but her heart knew better. What had grown between her and Rowan was far deeper than lust.
She loved him.
“You know that I cannot,” Anna said, stone faced.
“Then why the hell is it that when ye kiss me…I know that yer fighting it, fighting this attraction that is between us just as hard as I am?” Rowan said between his clenched teeth, his emotions playing openly on his bruised face. “Ye canna or ye willna, Anna? Which is it?”
Anna felt fresh tears welling up in her eyes. She bit her lip in an effort to hold them back. She looked at Rowan’s face knowing that he was everything that she wanted and yet everything that she could not have.
Rowan reached out and grabbed both of Anna’s hands in his and leaned forward, locking her eyes with his own. “Come away with me, Anna. If we can get away now, I promise that he’ll never find ye. We can build a life with Quinn and Malcolm, a good life for ourselves…we’ve got some money tae get us started,” Rowan’s green eyes were intense as he searched Anna’s face. “I’ll make ye happy, Anna,” he whispered.
Tears rolled down Anna’s cheeks. “I know you would, Rowan. I cannot even dare to dream of how happy I would be to run away right now, to be with you, to let myself…”
“Then do it. Choose me, Anna,” Rowan whispered as he brought Anna’s hands to his bloody lips and kissed them softly.
“You know that I cannot,” Anna said remorsefully.
“Dammit, Anna,” Rowan said with conviction. “Choose me and ye willna regret it a day in yer life,” he promised as his eyes implored Anna to follow her heart.
“Jonathan knows that I survived the shipwreck. There are men out looking for me, and my family…”
“Damn them all! Ye canna go through yer life always puttin’ others before yer own happiness. This is your life, Anna. Choose it as ye will!”
“I have a duty to my family and you of all people should understand what that is like,” Anna said harshly, voice heated now as she glanced over at Malcolm and Quinn.
“And above all, ye have a duty tae yerself that ye’re refusing tae acknowledge,” Rowan said, voice escalating. “And for that matter, ye have a duty tae me! God doesna put two people on this Earth and have this…this feeling between them if they are not meant tae be together. Can ye no se it? Can ye no feel it, Anna?”
“You know that I do,” Anna whispered, leaning forward and kissing Rowan ever so lightly on his bruised lips. The taste of his blood was coppery in her mouth. “And I will think of you for the rest of my life, Rowan Murray…but I know that I cannot keep you.”
“Sae ye’ve made yer choice,” Rowan said remorsefully. His eyes searched Anna’s face.
Let her go. Let her lead the life that she deserves.
Malcolm’s boots crunched across the ground, announcing his most inopportune presence. “Ye really should bind those ribs, brother,” he said, crouching down next to Rowan.
“Bugger off,” Rowan said angrily, not in the mood to deal with the nagging of his brother and wanting to finish his conversation with Anna. He glanced up at her as she wiped away the last of her tears; she looked relieved that Malcolm had woken and joined them.
“What did ye do tae her?” Malcolm asked accusingly as he saw the tears streaming down Anna’s face.
“I’m fine, Malcolm,” Anna lied coolly as she wiped away her tears.
“Ye better not have made her cry,” Malcolm threatened protectively, glowering down at his brother.
“Stop it, Malcolm. I said that I’m fine,” Anna said dismissively. “We were just talking about what happened, and I got emotional. I’m fine.”
Rowan exhaled slowly, shakily from the pain of his broken ribs. “I’m going tae be fine, Anna,” he whispered, seeking to give her an excuse that would explain her tears to Malcolm. “Can ye bind up my chest as ye were talking about earlier? It might help.”
“Sure,” Anna said, glad to have something purposeful to do with her now shaking hands. She reached up and unbuttoned the first three buttons on Rowan’s shirt, then slid it up carefully over his h
ead. Rowan winced in pain at having to lift his right arm. Anna tore a strip of material from the lining of her dress, causing Malcolm’s face to turn crimson as she exposed her legs.
Malcolm stood abruptly and walked back over to where Quinn was sleeping.
“Holler if ye need me, Anna,” he called over his shoulder, apparently still not trusting Rowan to be alone with her.
Anna wound the fabric from her dress tightly around Rowan’s ribcage, securing it with a knot. She allowed her fingers to linger for a moment over the hot skin of Rowan’s pectoral muscles, savoring the feeling of his bare skin beneath her fingertips.
“Aye, it feels better already,” Rowan lied through his teeth, seeking to lift Anna’s spirits.
“Liar,” Anna said, not buying his ruse. “Let me help you lower down to the ground so that you can sleep,” she said, standing and extending her hand to Rowan, taking his left hand in both of hers and helping him slowly lower himself down to the ground.
“Bloody hell!” Rowan exclaimed under his breath, groaning as he tried to find a comfortable position.
Anna grabbed a blanket and lowered herself down to lie next to Rowan, fitting her body up against his and trying to be careful not to bump his ribs. Unspoken words hung heavily between them. Anna began to speak but the words choked in her throat.
“I’m sorry, Rowan,” Anna said brokenly. A lump choked the words in her throat.
Rowan sighed with defeat as his body relented to the grips of his physical and mental exhaustion. He vowed to save his unfinished battle for Anna’s heart for tomorrow and kissed Anna’s hair before drifting off to sleep, secure in the knowledge that Anna was wrapped safely in his arms.
Men. Anna huffed in her mind. One minute he was pouring out his heart, begging her to choose him and the next minute his breath was hot on her neck as he slept, holding her tight against his chest.
Anna swallowed hard and felt the burning in her throat that happened only when she tried to choke back tears. She held her emotions inside until she felt Rowan’s rhythmic breathing take on the characteristics of deep slumber. Only then did she let the first warm tear trickle down her cheek.
She had made her choice.
Anna silently wriggled out from under Rowan’s arm and looked at him one more time in the darkness. Rowan had risked enough for her benefit. She could not allow him to give up his chance at freedom.
Her eyes lingered on his face in the darkness. The fire danced over Rowan’s skin as he slept. He was perfect, despite the bloody cut running across his angular jaw and the bruises that covered his face. His battle wounds made him even more beautiful to Anna, more beautiful because he had acquired those wounds defending her. He was everything that she had ever wanted. And to make things worse, Rowan had just told her so openly, so honestly that he wanted her too.
Despite her best intentions, Anna had fallen in love with Rowan Murray. There was nothing that she wanted more than to stay with him forever, to choose him as he had begged her to do.
“I love you, Rowan,” she whispered, brushing a soft kiss over his forehead. “And I’m sorry that I’ve hurt you.”
Every so quietly, Anna stood up, brushed off her skirts and walked into the darkness, knowing full well that she was about to break Rowan’s heart as well as her own.
Chapter Eleven
Rowan awoke just before dawn; his rough transition into wakefulness gave him a painful reminder of the injuries that he had sustained last night. His broken ribs throbbed terribly and a relentless headache pounded in his skull.
Something wasn’t right. His eyes flew open.
Anna.
“Anna?” Rowan croaked as he pushed himself up painfully from the forest floor. “Anna!” he said more urgently, his voice wringing with alarm. Rowan was on his feet now, his panicked eyes scanning the trees and dense undergrowth of the forest, still hazy with morning’s first light.
“Anna’s gone! Get up ye lazy bastards!” Rowan bellowed, frantic now to find her.
Quinn rolled over and squinted up at his brother.
“She left last night,” Quinn said lazily as he gathered his blanket more securely around his shoulders to fight off the chill of the morning.
“She what?” Rowan growled angrily as he hastily balled up his blanket and began to saddle his mare.
“After ye fell asleep, she left. The lass has a fair bit more sense about her than ye do and I figured that she made up her mind tae leave before she did ye anymore harm. I thought it best that she was leaving sae I pretended tae be asleep and let her go.”
“Ye just let her go? Just like that ye let her go?” Rowan exclaimed, voice surging in exasperation with his brother.
Quinn nodded and yawned loudly.
“Have ye any idea how stupid…how dangerous it is for Anna tae be out in the forest at night alone?” Rowan raged, pacing back and forth and glowering down at Quinn.
“She’ll be fine. Anna’s plenty capable. This place is crawling with English and they’ll get her safely tae Arbor.”
Rowan shook his head in blatant disapproval. “I canna believe ye, brother. Ye ken that I…that I care about her and…”
“Yes, I know precisely, Rowan,” Quinn snapped, cutting his brother off. “I can see it written all over yer face. I’ve watched ye fall for her, and I warned ye…”
“I couldna help it!” Rowan raged. “Do ye think that I wanted this?” he asked, green eyes wild. “Do ye think that I asked for this?”
“No, I doona, but this is the best thing that could have happened – her leaving ye. Ye need tae let her go and think of our future here. Leave her be,” Quinn threatened.
“I’m going after her,” Rowan said defiantly. He untied the mare from her tether, fumbling with the reins due to his battered left hand. The horse pranced eagerly before him, ready to be on the road.
“Anna has made her decision brother,” Quinn said, rising to his feet and glaring up at his younger brother, eyes clouded with warning. “If ye really do love her, ye should let her go. Let her find the life that she was meant tae lead before she met ye.”
“If anyone understands what it means tae love someone, it should be you! I’ll not live the rest of my life wonderin’ if I should have gone after her,” Rowan said as he mounted the horse. “If it was Mairi…”
“Doona dare bring Mairi intae this,” Quinn seethed, eyes dark and foreboding.
“I’m going after her,” Rowan said defiantly. He kicked the mare into motion, guiding her towards the road. When he reached the pale dust of the road, he saw the unmistakable pattern; crimson contrasting with the light dusty Earth.
Rowan’s breath choked in this throat.
Blood.
..ooOoo..
Quinn and Malcolm caught up with Rowan at the edge of the village just before dusk. Rowan accepted their presence, but did not speak to his brothers. Unspoken words hung heavy in the air between them as they rode side-by-side down the main street.
Rowan was on edge. His eyebrows were scrunched together in ever-growing concern. The shadow of worry was now openly visible on his unshaven face.
Rowan reined his horse to a stop outside of a small inn and dismounted painfully, holding his ribs as he forced his body upright. He was stiff from riding all day and his injuries hurt more than he was willing to show his brothers. He walked inside the inn to inquire about Anna and walked back out a moment later, shaking his head in signal to his brothers.
Fear was beginning to grow inside of Rowan. He was determined to find Anna, determined to set things right between them. She could not just walk out of his life in the middle of the night and leave so many words unspoken.
Repeating the same ritual for the third time, Rowan painfully dismounted his horse and tied her to the hitching post. He walked into the second inn, expecting to come up empty-handed again. The door swung closed loudly behind him and his heart nearly stopped beating.
There sat Anna smiling at the bar, seated on a tall stool enjoying a mug of ale,
surrounded by the very same soldiers that had tried to kill him last night. Rowan felt his mouth drop open in surprise and in the same instant, he felt his blood begin to boil. His eyes centered on the soldier who had dared to lay hands upon Anna.
Involuntarily, a low growl escaped from Rowan’s throat and all at once, the pack of English soldiers and Anna turned to look at him.
Anna’s eyes flew open in recognition. Her mug of ale fell to the stone floor with a loud clatter.
No one moved.
“I don’t want any trouble,” the pot-bellied inn keeper said disparagingly as he shook his head from behind the counter. He scratched his rust-colored beard while contemplating how to best diffuse the situation between the angry man that had just entered his establishment and the soldiers while still earning himself a hefty profit. “After listening to the lady, it sounds like what happened last night was all a big misunderstanding,” the innkeeper said firmly, knowing that he needed to tread cautiously or all hell might break loose. “Why didn’t you tell them that she is engaged to marry Lieutenant Arbor?” the innkeeper asked, raising his eyebrows in question at Rowan and shaking his head in the direction of the soldiers.
“Well, let me see,” Rowan began. “It could have been that they did no give me a chance tae tell them anything because he was too busy trying tae rape her and they were too busy tryin’ tae kill me,” Rowan said angrily, his muscles tense and ready to attack at the slightest movement from the soldiers. His hatred for the soldiers boiled red hot in his veins.
“And for their rudeness, they should buy you a pitcher of ale,” the innkeeper nodded at the barkeep, who had already begun to draw a pitcher of ale for said purpose. “As I said, this appears to have been a misunderstanding. Now that it is settled we can all get along,” he said with an air of warning heavy in his voice. “I’ll have no trouble here tonight.”
Anna refused to make eye contact with Rowan, knowing that she might fall apart if she did. She was ashamed of leaving him without an explanation, without a goodbye, but it was the only way that she could leave him.