Finding Strength: A Club Dark Novel

by Reagan Hollow

  A long, deep moan, escapes my lips that may, or may not, have been to the tune of his name. I feel his hot breath trail across my neck, creating goosebumps on my skin, as he chuckles softly.

  He plants another kiss to the side of my neck before he releases me completely.

  Immediately, I feel the loss of his touch, my heart sinking when he stands up. Preparing myself for him to throw me out, I stand and begin walking toward the door.

  “Where are you going?” I hear him say from behind me.

  I turn to see he’s turned the blankets down, “I just thought… well, I figured...” my words trail off as soon as he begins unbuttoning his jeans. In one swoop, he’s got them around his ankles and onto the floor. My eyes roam down his taut, lean body, and settle at the hard bulge between his legs.

  “Well? Are you just going to stand there, or are you coming to bed?” He asks as he slides himself onto the bed and under the covers.

  He didn’t need to ask me twice. Sliding in beside him, he gently turns me where my injured arm is resting on my side, my back facing him. He pulls my body into his, giving me a very personal feeling of just how happy he is right now. With my head resting on his arm, his other comes around my waist, locking me in tight against his warm body.

  Once again, I feel his breath across my neck as he whispers in my ear, “As badly as I want to take you, right here, right now, we can’t.” He kisses me right behind my ear before he finishes, “you’re still recovering, and you need rest.” Before I can protest, he adds, “I need rest too, and once we start, baby, we’re not going to stop. But that doesn’t mean I can’t hold you and feel you in my arms as we sleep.”

  Not knowing what to say to that, I settle deeper into the crook of his arm, molding my body into his and for once, I fall quickly into a dreamless and peaceful slumber.

  I lay here for what feels like hours. Content with the fact that she’s in my bed after the distance I wedged between us these last few days. I’m trying my damndest to be a good man, to give her body and mind the opportunity it needs to heal. Fuck if she’s not making that hard to do. Even now, feeling her warm body against mine, watching the steady rise and fall of her chest, has my cock painfully hard and ready to push inside her, knowing she wouldn’t resist me. My restraint is hanging on by a thread.

  Glancing toward the clock on the nightstand beside the bed, I see that it's just after three in the morning. Seeing that there’s going to be no sleep anytime soon, I gently remove my arm from under her head, and resolve myself to a cold shower.

  Waking up the next morning to the cold draft is no surprise. I didn’t expect Cory to stay the whole night, though I do wonder where he went. What is a surprise is the intense pain that’s once again set into the bottom of my stomach.

  The sudden urge to empty anything that might be in there takes over me, having me jumping from the bed quicker than I thought possible in my condition. I barely make it to the bathroom before I all but bury my face into the toilet, violently dry heaving. The sudden off and on clenching to my abdomen has me shrieking in pain between each spell; hot tears streaming down my cheeks.

  The moment doesn’t last very long before it passes, but it feels as if everything has been drained from me. I don’t want Cory worrying over me anymore than he already is, so I splash some cold water over my face, hoping this helps make me appear normal. Though I feel anything but normal right now.

  I’m walking back into his bedroom when he comes in from the hall, holding a tray in his hands.

  “Oh, good. You’re up. I’ve brought you breakfast.” My stomach churns at his words but I try to hold it back.

  “Smells delicious.” I lie. However, eating might just make me feel better. My diet has been a bit strange lately, which may explain why I’m not feeling well. My body has been through the ringer, so this must be its way of letting me know it’s had enough. Okay, I’ve got the memo!

  I take a seat on the couch across the room. Instantly, memories of our time spent in this very spot flood my mind. Though I’ve never lead an easy life, I was happy for once. I’d give anything to get back to that point.

  Cory sits down beside me, placing the tray on the small table in front of us.

  “Are you doing alright?” He questions, sliding a loose strand of hair behind my ear.

  Knowing I can’t look him in the eyes and lie to him, I lower my head and give him a slight nod, gesturing toward the tray of food.

  “Anything good on there?” I try for playful, hoping I successfully divert his attention.

  “Al mentioned you haven’t been eating very well, so I’ve stocked you with all the essentials.” He lifts the lid, and instantly, the aroma hits me, making my stomach both growl and turn. It’s an odd combination and I just barely hold back the gag making its way up my throat.

  Everything I could have asked for sits on the plate before me. Scrambled eggs, bacon, whole-wheat toast, an assortment of fruit. There’s even a small bowl of what looks like yogurt with a mint leaf hanging off the side. It all looks so good, if only I could get my stomach on board.

  I settle with the toast, hoping it’s light enough to keep me from being sick.

  “Why aren’t you eating?” I question, just realizing there’s only one tray sitting here.

  “I nibbled while I was cooking.”

  “You cooked this?”

  “Well, yes. I do have other skills.” With that, he gives me a sexy as hell smirk while raising his eyebrows. Heat floods my cheeks. I have no idea why I’m suddenly so shy.

  “I’m going to jump in the shower, enjoy your breakfast.”

  “Okay,” I say under my breath and watch him as he walks into his bathroom. How am I ever going to convince him that I’m fine if I can’t even get a grip while I’m around him.

  I’ve managed to eat all the toast, but I can’t stomach anything else. So, I wait until I’ve heard the shower going for a few minutes, and walk the tray back downstairs.

  I’ve dumped most of it in the trash when I hear footsteps coming from behind me. Making quick work of emptying the tray and dumping it into the sink to be washed, I almost make it out of the kitchen before I collide with Al, who steadies me with his arms around my biceps to keep me from landing flat on my ass.

  “I’m sorry Miss Lacey, are you alright?”

  “I’m fine Al, I wasn't watching where I was going,” I say to assure him.

  “How was your breakfast?” He asks as he lets me go to make his way into the kitchen.

  “Umm, it was good.” I lie, but should’ve known he could see right through me. I’ve noticed he can be very perceptive.

  “You didn’t eat, did you?” I don’t answer though, I don’t need to, he already knows.

  I hear him sigh from across the room. “I don’t mean to pry, dear, but you can’t keep going on like this, it’s going to make you sick. Mr. Lewis is concerned about you and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t, also,” He says with a somber look painted across his face.

  I don’t even know what to say to this. It’s not like I’m deliberately starving myself. I’d give anything to down a juicy cheeseburger right now. But even the thought of food right now has my stomach turning.

  I give him a tight smile and turn my back on him, heading up to the room. I’m sure he’ll report this to Cory, but I can’t deal with that right now.

  I hear the shower cut off as I open the door to his room. Quickly shutting the door before he can spot me, I make my way back to the guest room. Call me a coward, but I don’t want to face anymore of his questions or look into his heated eyes right now.

  After walking through the door, I’m surprised to find an oversized gift box laying across the bed I’ve been occupying.

  Taking a small step toward the bed, I’m startled when Amber pops out of the closet.

  “What the fuck, Amber?” I gasp, feeling my heart in my throat, “I wasn’t expecting you to be there.”

  “Well, who were you expecting, sweetie?” She says in
her sugary voice.

  “I was expecting to be alone, actually.” Realizing how terrible that sounds, I quickly add, “I just meant, I wasn’t sure if you left last night, was all.”

  “I’m here for as long as you need me, Lace.” At the sound of my old nickname from Aaron, an onslaught of memories start to make their way front and center. Sinister smirks mixed with angry grunts play on repeat, the memory so vivid it’s hard to separate what’s real from what’s not.

  I can vaguely hear Amber saying something, but her voice is drowned out by that ugly nickname, playing over and over, taunting me with the realization that I may never be happy again.

  “Lacey!” She screams, finally breaking through the horrid memories threatening to take me over. “Are you okay?”

  “Just…” I drag in a deep, calming breath before I finish, “just please don’t call me that.” I finally manage to squeeze out. Funny how one little word can make someone feel so small. I thought I was doing good, apparently, I was wrong.

  “Oh, sweetie,” she grabs me by the elbow and leads me over to the bed. “Do you want to talk about it?”

  Do I? I’m not sure I’m ready, but getting something out might help. At least I hope.

  “Aaron used to call me Lace. It was his special term of endearment that I used to enjoy hearing. Now–” I choke up a little. It’s one thing to think about what he did to me. But to say it out loud almost feels like I’m giving him some sort of power that I’m just not comfortable giving him, dead or not. “Now, hearing it only stirs up what he did to me, what he put me through. I just...I just can’t handle it.” Wisely, she doesn’t question how far things went between us, though I know she already knows. I respect her so much more for allowing me the space to talk about it on my own terms and in my own time. She never pushes for more than I can give.

  “Well then, I know just the thing to cheer you up.” She jumps up off the bed with far too much excitement, and walks around the side of the bed to the box I noticed when walking through the door.

  “Al dropped this by earlier this morning, do you know how tempting it’s been to open this up?” She smiles down at me and places the box into my lap.

  For reasons I can’t explain, my hand begins to tremble, so bad that Amber has to assist me with removing the top.

  Inside is a neatly folded piece of paper, sitting atop solid black tissue paper. Picking up the paper, I take note of the spiral calligraphy adorning the outside, giving it a sort of fancy flair.

  Opening the note, I read,

  Lacey,

  I want to start by saying I’m sorry. Two words that a woman like you should never have to hear, yet I find myself saying them. So many things I should be apologizing for, most important being that I wasn’t there to protect you. Every day I wake up wondering what could I have done differently? Yet, I’m always coming up short. I hope, with time, you might find it in you to trust me again, and until then, I’ll spend my time making sure you know I’ll never let any harm come to you ever again. I’ll spend the rest of my life showing you just what you mean to me, if you’ll allow me.

  Love you, forever,

  Cory

  Quickly swiping at the tears that seem to be flowing from my eyes without my permission, my heart swells with love and hope. Love for a man I’m only beginning to know, yet feel like I’ve known my entire life. And hope that, just maybe, I’ll be allowed happiness for once in my life.

  “Well?” Amber breaks through my dazed state. “What is it?”

  I pull the tissue paper back one piece at a time, pulling the soft, silky cloth from inside. Seeing as I’m still only operating with the one arm, holding the piece of clothing up proves to be a challenge.

  I’m thankful when Amber notices my struggles and grabs the fabric from my hands, to hold up in front of me.

  I’m utterly speechless and just a bit intimidated when I see what lies just inside the box. There’s absolutely no way I’ll ever look good in something as gorgeous as this.

  The navy-blue halter dress held before me, is nothing short of stunning and I’m thankful that the cleavage area at least looks a bit on the conservative side. But my worry spikes when she turns the dress to reveal the back is totally non-existent. It’s truly a beautiful dress, but I feel as if it’s made for someone a little more... adequate.

  “Girl, you are going to look so good in this dress.”

  “No way am I wearing this, Amber, I’ll look silly.” They’ve both lost their minds if they think I am.

  “Lacey, listen babe. You need this. You need something to make you feel again, and honey, this is it.” She squeals, making it hard not to feel some of her excitement, but still, I’m not comfortable.

  “I can’t go out in public in this, my bruises haven’t even had the chance to properly heal, Amber. Besides that, I don’t even know where we are going. What if it’s somewhere fancy?”

  She gives me a stern look. “You can, and you will. As far as the bruises, look at them as battle wounds and wear them with pride, because they mean you survived Lacey. And you best believe, you are a survivor. No matter what you may think, never forget that.” She plants a kiss on the side of my cheek as she adds, “Now, let's get you in this dress.”

  After stepping out of the shower and noticing that my room was empty, it took every ounce of willpower I had not to go to her and drag her back here. But I knew beforehand that she’d run, which is why I had the dress sent to her room and not my own.

  I can only hope she can take my gift for what it is. I’ve never been the type to buy my affections with money, or the finer things in life, but I want her to feel happy. I want her to feel comfortable and beautiful in not only her own skin, but while in the presence of others as well. An overwhelming urge takes over me, making me feel like I’d go to the ends of this world just so she’d know I’d done everything I can for her.

  Stepping inside my closet and pulling out the suit I had custom designed to match her dress, I begin to get ready and hope that I haven’t just made a fool of myself.

  My phone begins to vibrate in my pocket as I’m waiting at the bottom of the staircase. I’m a bit surprised when I see Alex’s name come across my screen. He’s been hanging around the house more and more lately, I have no doubt that it’s because Amber is here, but he knows I have plans with Lacey today. He wouldn’t bother me unless it was important.

  For that very reason, I’m instantly wary as I answer his phone call.

  “Alex, what’s up?”

  “Hey, boss. We wanted to do a little digging before we alerted you, but Amber has informed me that you overheard her talking about it.”

  “Am I to assume this is regarding the undercover lurking about in my club?”

  “Yes, sir. All we know at this point is that he wasn’t there for you. He’s investigating Amber, we haven’t figured out why but my team is investigating as we speak.”

  Hmm, interesting.

  “Why is it that Amber hasn’t informed me of this, or you for that matter?” It pisses me off to find out that my employees are hiding shit from me.

  “At this point, Amber doesn’t know.” Even more interesting. “And again sir, we wanted solid information before bringing more stress down on you. We all know you have a lot going on right now and I didn’t want add to it if it turned out to be nothing.”

  At this, Lacey appears at the top of the stairs, completely erasing any further thoughts of Amber or the investigation.

  “Keep me posted,” I growl into the phone before hanging up on him. I trust that he’ll get to the bottom of it.

  As my eyes land upon her, I feel every nerve in my body come alive, heating my body to a temperature not normal for any human being. Starting at her feet, I get a glance at the milky white skin that peaks out from under the dress, showing me a small peek of the simple sandals strapped to her feet. Trailing my eyes slowly up her body, I’m both regretful and pleased with the selection I made for her.

  The dress hugs her body li
ke a glove, showing off her full hourglass figure. The bottom flowing around her feet and growing tighter around mid-thigh. I purposely made sure her chest would be covered, knowing that I wouldn’t be able to keep my eyes off her, though seeing her now, I see that was an empty notion. She could be standing before me stark naked or dressed in a burlap sack and it wouldn’t make a damn difference, my desire for her would still be the same.

  She takes a tentative step forward, placing one foot on the step below her. I find myself visibly readjusting myself when the dress rises ever so slightly up her leg, giving just a little tease at what lies beneath.

  Forcing my gaze higher our eyes finally meet, and that once familiar charge surges through the air, connecting the two of us with each step she takes in my direction. Her sharp intake of breath lets me know she feels it too.

  I’m doing everything I can to be a gentleman in this moment, but she’s making it extremely difficult. Despite what she might be trying to make me believe, I know deep down that she’s not okay. I screwed up by putting distance between us, when I should’ve been there for her. I refuse to push her into anything she may not be ready for.

  No, I plan to take my time with her, making sure that once I take her, all thoughts of what happened to her will be completely erased from her mind.

  Her feet finally hit the bottom step, and I’m thankful to have at least reigned in my lust enough to form coherent words without drooling all over myself like a little boy going through puberty and seeing a pretty woman for the first time.

  “Wow! You look gorgeous.” Instantly, her cheeks turn a deep crimson red, making her look even more beautiful than she already does. Vowing to do whatever it takes to put that blush upon her face more often, I offer her the crook of my arm and escort her to the limo I have waiting out front for us.

  “So, where are we going?” I question him as soon as he climbs in the back of the limo with me. A sexy smile lights up his face, causing butterflies to swarm around my belly.