by Ali Parker
I scrolled to Tanner’s name in my phone and stared at it just as I’d done the entire time I’d been in Georgia. I couldn‘t do it. I turned the screen off and put the phone on the counter. Walking away from it, I went to my room and flopped on my bed. I put my hands over my belly. I had a child growing inside of me. What was I going to do?
31
Tanner
“Do you have a truck?” I asked the rental agent at the airport car rental.
“No, all out of trucks. We only have cars. You can choose between a hybrid or a regular sedan,” he said.
I sighed. “I’ll take the hybrid.”
“Alright then, sign here please,” he said.
I was nervous. A truck would have made me feel more in my element, at least. I had just travelled from Texas to Georgia on an early flight. I was nervous the whole time and it didn’t have anything to do with the plane, it was because of Madison. What if she didn’t want to see me? What if she was already seeing someone else? It would probably be some Ivy League professor, seducing her with his intelligence and academic repartee, compared to me, some dumb rancher with a master’s degree. Of course men would be throwing themselves at her. Not only was she stunning, but she was damn smart.
“Here are the keys,” the agent said, breaking me out of my anxiety attack.
“Thanks,” I said.
Grabbing up my duffel bag, I headed to the car. I had a long drive ahead of me from the Atlanta Airport. Madison was in a small Georgia town, home to a small college campus, about a two hour drive from the airport. I wished it was shorter.
I drove straight through, without a thought to stopping. I was nervous the whole way and was glad for the country scenery after leaving Atlanta. It felt more comfortable to be in a rural setting. The farms, cotton fields, and barns I passed were a welcome sight. It made the drive much better.
Finally, I reached the small town, and it wasn’t long before I was parked on the college campus.
“You can do this man, you’re a Dawson,” I said to myself as I looked in my rearview mirror. Climbing out of the car, which I’d parked right outside the building the lab was apparently in, I put on my white cowboy hat.
Taking a deep breath, I approached the building and walked inside. It seemed smaller, only half the size of the one we had worked in together back in Safety. But as soon as I walked, in the familiar surroundings of the lab environment made me think of her. It made me think of the very first time we had sex in the lab. Damn, I missed her.
“Hello, I’m looking for the office of Madison Dryer,” I said, addressing an older woman in a business suit passing in the hall.
“Yes, she is just down the hall to the left. You’ll see her name on the door,” she said, pointing in that direction.
“Great, thank you.” I continued walking down the hall, starting to get nervous again the closer I got to the door on the left, but I was also incredibly excited. I adjusted my hat again.
The door with her name on the plaque was open. I stood in the doorway and there she was. Her long blond hair was up in a bun and she was bent over a chair pushing files into a bag. She looked even more beautiful than I remembered, absolutely stunning. My entire body responded to her as though she was already touching me.
“Calling it a day?” I asked.
She froze for a second. Then she turned to look at the doorway. The bag fell on the floor.
“Tanner,” she whispered. I smiled as she quickly ran over and threw her arms around me. I was relieved and I hugged her back, happy to get such a greeting, I had been afraid she might tell me to go screw myself. Or that I would walk in on her with another guy in the throes of passion.
“Madison,” I whispered. I smelled her hair as I hugged her. It smelled like coconut just as I remembered.
“What are you doing here? I can’t believe it. Am I dreaming? You are here, in Georgia. I-I don’t understand,” she said, pulling away from me. She looked up at me with those dark blue eyes as she rambled on with her questions.
“I know. It’s crazy that I’m here.”
“So why are you here?”
I looked at her, not knowing how to tell her everything I wanted to say in this moment. It didn’t feel right doing it here, right now. But I knew that I needed to tell her. It was the whole reason why I’d come all this way.
“I came here because of you, Madison. I came because I need to talk to you. Are you free for dinner?”
“Dinner?”
“Yes, dinner. I know how you feel about going on a date and everything. But Madison, I flew all the way from Texas. Let me take you on a date, a romantic date.”
She smiled a brilliant smile that nearly stopped my heart.
“All right, I can go to dinner. I am very hungry anyway.”
“Good. I passed an Italian restaurant on the way here. It looked fairly classy, how do you feel about going there?”
“Italian sounds good to me. Just let me get my things,” she said.
“No, let me.” I said, grabbing her stuff for her. We walked side-by-side down the hall. This felt good and right. Reminiscent of walking down the hall in the old lab when we were first working together. I remembered how feisty and spirited she was during those first few days. I looked at her and smiled. She returned the smile and I wondered if she was feeling the same way.
We stepped out into the sun, and the humidity.
“I’m parked over here. I rented a car,” I said, walking in that direction.
“A car, huh? I haven’t seen you drive a car before. It seems strange not to see you in a truck,” she laughed.
“Yeah, and it’s strange not driving one. I feel very low to the ground like I’m on a skateboard,” I said. Plus my hat doesn’t fit. She laughed and we got in the car and pulled away from the college campus. I could feel her looking at me as she sat in the passenger seat. I looked at her. Her dark blue eyes were sparkling and she had a big smile on her face.
“I still can’t believe it. I can’t believe that you’re here,” she said.
“I should have been here a long time ago,” I said, looking at her seriously.
The smile fell from her face and her brows pushed together in concern. She turned away from me and looked ahead. “The Italian restaurant is just down the way.”
I grew tense. I had just said something vulnerable and clearly it made her uncomfortable. I knew she avoided intimacy. It was because of everything with her father, but I couldn’t let that stop me this time. I’d let it stop me before, but I couldn’t do that now.
A few minutes later we were sitting at a table with a red and white checkered tablecloth with a long tapered white candle stuck into a wine bottle in the middle of the table. It was dark and romantic, even though it was barely sunset outside. The restaurant was fairly quiet and we were fortunate to get a booth in the corner. Very private.
“I’m starving. I came straight from the airport and haven’t had anything since breakfast,” I said, looking at the menu.
“Yeah, me too,” she said as she tore a piece off the bread that was on a wooden cheeseboard on the table.
“Can I take your order or do you need a few minutes?”
“Oh no, we’re ready I think,” Madison said, swallowing down the piece of bread in her mouth. “I will have the penne pasta with pesto sauce, and the Caesar salad.”
“That sounds great, I’ll have the same,” I said.
“Very good.” The waiter walked away and Madison looked at me. She smiled, and I knew she was waiting to hear what I had travelled from Texas to tell her.
“How’s the new job? That college is really cool looking,” I said, making small talk first.
“It’s good. The new job is good, in fact I love it. I can’t believe I’m a lab manager, it’s so crazy.”
“You deserve it. You are the smartest woman I know Madison, hands down.”
We stared at each other, and both got quiet.
“So,” she said.
“You’re wa
iting to hear what I have to say,” I said.
She nodded her head.
“I’m just gonna to say it. I came here because I’ve been filled with regret since the day you left. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about everything that I should have said that day and didn’t. I wasn’t honest with you that day. I wanted to tell you not to come here. I wanted to ask you to stay in Texas and be with me. But I couldn’t do that, because I didn‘t want to stand in the way of your career. I didn‘t want you to resent me if you did stay and regretted it turning down an opportunity like this. But what I should have said, and what I will say now is that I love you, Madison. I can‘t stop thinking about you. You are everything to me and it doesn‘t matter where you are. If you’re here and I‘m in Texas, we could make it work somehow. I don‘t know how, but I’m willing to try anything. I’m willing to try any sort of schedule just to be with you.”
“Tanner. That’s—”
“Wait, I’m not finished. Ever since you left, I haven’t been myself. I’ve been a complete mess. You gave me a reason to wake up in the mornings, and now that you’re gone I don’t even want to. I’m not doing my work at the ranch. I can’t focus. I don’t even know who I am anymore. I need you, Madison. I love you.”
“More bread?” the waiter said, interrupting at the most inopportune moment.
Madison pressed her lips together trying not to burst out laughing.
“No thanks. We’re good for now, thank you,” I said anxiously, wanting him to leave us before he ruined the moment. His timing couldn’t have been any worse.
As he walked away, Madison reached across the table and grabbed my hand. She squeezed it.
“Tanner, I uh—I love you too.”
“You do? Thank God,” I said, so relieved.
“Yes, I really do. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you either. Every day you’ve been on my mind. When I left you didn‘t say anything, and I haven’t heard from you, so—”
“Because I’m an idiot, Madison. I‘m not one to share my feelings and it was a stupid mistake.”
“I guess I was the same way. I didn’t say what I was really thinking at the time either. I wasn’t honest. I cared for you deeply then, just as I do now. I was afraid I’d make a fool of myself, thinking you probably didn’t feel the same way. I guess we both should have said something.”
“Yep, you’re right. But I‘m here now. I came all this way because I knew I had to correct my mistake.”
“I am so glad you did. You have no idea how glad I am to see you. I’m so happy to hear you say those words to me. You can’t possibly know what it means to me, but you will.”
“I will? What do you mean?”
“Here we are, two penne pesto and Caesar salads,” the waiter said, putting the food in front of us.
“Thank you, it smells delicious,” she said.
“Anything else?” he asked.
“No, thank you,” I said. The waiter walked away and I turned back to Madison. “So, what do you mean?”
“Let’s eat first. I’ll tell you later after dinner,” she said, picking up her fork and digging in.
I was very curious now, though I assumed she meant that she was going to show me with her body how happy she was to hear my words. I was more than happy to accept that kind of appreciation. We ate the delicious Italian meal and followed it up with tiramisu. When we were done, I drove us to her apartment.
“I like it. This is a good apartment. Top floor, that’s good. Safer that way,” I said, walking around the apartment noticing how she hadn’t decorated or anything like she had in her last place. She seemed to only have the basic necessities. A couch, a coffee table, a TV and a kitchen table. It really didn’t even look lived-in.
“It’s all right. I prefer my apartment back in Safety,” she said.
“Well, I know that no one has taken it yet because there’s still a ‘for rent’ sign out front,” I said.
“There is? How do you know that?”
“Because I drive by there like a fool every single day,” I said.
She smiled and came over to me, putting her arms around my neck. I couldn‘t take it anymore and leaned down and kissed her. It was a long, deep kiss, filled with longing. I enjoyed feeling her warm body against mine and liked the way she smelled and the ache in my heart that was starting to heal. She moaned as she kissed me and I moved my hands down the sides of her sexy body to her waist. She quickly stopped and pulled away from me, looking up at me with those blue eyes.
“What? What is it? Is everything alright? I asked her.
“There’s something I need to tell you, Tanner. Something I’ve only just found out, but I don’t know quite how to say it,” she said. I could see that there was worry on her face. Her demeanor had completely changed.
“You can tell me anything, Madison. We’re in this together now, you and I. No matter what.”
“I don’t know if I can tell you this. I want to savor this time right now while you still love me. Because after I tell you this you might not want anything to do with me.”
“That is impossible. No matter what it is I will want to be with you. Always. I love you, Madison.”
She was quiet. Grabbing my hands in hers, she took a deep breath. “I’m pregnant, Tanner. I’m pregnant and of course it’s yours.”
Shock took over my entire body. I knew that my eyes grew wide by the look on her face and I couldn’t speak for a good ten seconds.
“Are you okay? Do you need to sit down?” she asked.
But I still couldn’t talk. I was still in a state of shock. She had just dropped a giant reality bomb on me. It was information that was life changing and my brain was still trying to process her words.
“See, I knew it. It’s too much, and you don’t want anything to do with me. I understand,” she said.
Hearing her words startled me out of my shocked state of mind. A smile came across my face as it all sunk in.
“Are you kidding? That’s not true at all. I’m just surprised. Give a guy a minute to process the news. Man, really? Are you sure? We’re going to have a baby? I’m going to be a father? Madison, this is—I’m shocked. This is—”
“Awful?” she asked.
“Awful? No. It’s incredible.” By now, I couldn’t stop smiling.
A smile came across her face. “Really? You mean it, Tanner? You’re excited about this?”
“Yes. Really excited. You and our baby? I couldn’t be happier. Woo-hoo!” I shouted.
She laughed, with tears in her eyes. “I was so worried. I was going to tell you, I was trying to get my courage up, I chickened out when I started to call. This is all new to me too, and I hadn’t figured out how to tell you yet. It seemed like something that I shouldn’t say over the phone and I was trying to decide if I should go to Texas to tell you in person. But then you showed up, you’re here. I can’t believe it. I am pregnant with your child.”
“I couldn’t be prouder. I’m so glad that you’re carrying my child Madison. Our child. I’m so happy,” I said, giving her a kiss on the lips. Then I dropped down to my knees in front of her and kissed her lightly on the belly. “Hello in there, baby.”
She laughed. “You are so silly.”
“And you Madison Dryer, are mine,” I said.
I got up from the floor and pulled her into my arms. Then I kissed her with more passion than I knew I had. Scooping her up in my arms, I carried her to the bedroom.
“I am going to make love to you all night long.”
“That’s all that I want,” she whispered.
I laid her slowly on the bed and hovered over her, kissing her lips. I was going to pleasure her entire body.
“Let’s get this off of you,” I said, pushing up her shirt. I pushed it up her body slowly, caressing her skin as I did so. I pulled the shirt over her head. Then I unhooked her bra, letting her breasts free. I sucked in a sharp breath of air as I looked at her gorgeous breasts, and moaned as I put my hands on them,
massaging them. She arched her back up, enjoying the sensation.
“You are so damn beautiful, Madison,” I moaned, before moving closer and covering her breast with my mouth, kissing and sucking on her hard rosy nipple.
32
Madison
The moment I heard his voice, I froze. It couldn’t be, but as soon as I saw him I couldn’t contain my happiness. I ran to him and hugged him tight, so relieved to see him standing there. I had been an emotional mess since finding out his child was growing inside of me, and the fact that he was standing there could only be good news. For a moment, I thought I’d imagined it because he’d been on my mind nonstop. But he was really there, and now I could feel his warmth around me as I hugged him and inhaled his manly scent.
But the joy continued as I realized he was there to tell me that he loved me. What a great relief to hear those words, because I felt exactly the same way. Still, I was afraid to tell him that I was pregnant because I did not know how he would react. Sure, he loved me, but he loved me as a single woman, not a pregnant woman that was changing his life forever with the responsibility of a child. But he took it in stride and was actually happy and proud that I carried his child, and that meant everything to me. Now, he kissed me with a passion and intensity, like I had never felt before. When we used to lie together it was more of a primal act of sex. Two forces drawn together. This was different—
He slowly kissed my breasts and massaged them. I could feel his callused hands, hard and rough from working on the ranch. He was a real cowboy and that turned me on. I ran my hands over his strong forearms and biceps, feeling his toned muscles.
He stopped and looked at me and there was a grin on his face as he moved down my body and took off my boots. “I need to get you completely naked so I can kiss every inch of you. I’ve missed you and I don’t mean to take your body for granted,” he whispered.
I sighed. He was being so romantic, a side that I hadn’t really seen yet. I nodded my head with a smile. He just shot that dashing cowboy grin at me, then unzipped my jeans and pulled them and my panties off, casting both to the floor. Now I laid there completely naked, while he was still completely clothed, just as he had planned. It felt good. I felt feminine and sexy.