by Laura Hart
“Well, if I don’t know, then we’ll both go in my car,” announced Max, stopping and looking seriously at her.
“Oh, all right. I promise I’ll go.”
“I’ll follow you there just to be sure.”
Being Equal Doesn’t Require Being the Same
Max’s mind was a jumble of thoughts as he followed Sadie’s yellow Jeep Renegade the short distance to her own place. What he wanted to do was wrap her in his arms and make love to her, but he had some serious convincing to do before that was going to happen again. She needed to first understand that he wasn’t a threat to her desire for independence, and frankly, he wasn’t quite sure how he was going to accomplish that.
She pulled into her driveway and he followed and parked behind her. They walked to the door in silence, and she unlocked it and let them both in, but once inside, Max gave in to his feelings. Pulling Sadie close to him, he kissed her, all the time expecting her to push him away. She did initially stiffen but then softened and relaxed into his arms, so he let his mouth linger on hers for longer than he’d planned.
Finally, he straightened up. “All right, now we can talk.”
“That wasn’t fair,” objected Sadie weakly.
“Says who?”
Sadie glared at him and then took on the role of hostess. “Do you want something to drink?”
“I wouldn’t say no to a beer, if you have one.”
Sadie brought him a beer and poured herself some tea.
“You’re not much of a drinker, are you?” asked Max, looking at her tall glass of tea.
“Depends, but I don’t feel like having anything right now.” She motioned him towards the sofa and invited him to sit down, then sat in a chair facing him, tucked one of her legs under her the same way Harmony had, and said, “Okay, talk.”
Max took a drink of his beer and set it down before asking bluntly, “Why haven’t you answered my calls?”
“I needed to think.”
“Why would you need to think before talking to me? If you have a problem with me, talk to me directly about it.”
“It’s not that easy.”
“You didn’t seem to have a problem talking to me this weekend.”
“I needed to think before talking to you, and when I’m with you, I can’t think.”
“Where I come from, cutting someone off with no warning or explanation is considered rude. Couldn’t you have called me and said that you were going silent for twenty-four or forty-eight or however many hours, and that you’d call me when you’d finished thinking?”
“I don’t have any experience in this, so I probably didn’t do it right. I’m sorry.”
“Experience in what, exactly? Shutting out the guy you just spent the weekend making love with?”
Sadie didn’t answer, and Max could see tears in her eyes, so he softened his tone.
“Sadie, I care about you a lot, and I’m trying to build a relationship with you. If I’m wasting my time, you need to tell me. I don’t promise that I’ll give up, but at least I’ll know where I stand.”
Sadie still didn’t answer, and after a minute of silence, Max decided to jump into the deep end.
“I read your blog today.”
That got Sadie’s attention, and she looked up at him with wide eyes. “How did you know where to find it? I use a different name. Did Harmony tell you?”
Max didn’t want to start a family problem, so he changed the subject. “You write very well, but I’m not sure I agree with all your conclusions.”
“Well, you’re a man, so I wouldn’t expect you to.” Her voice had taken on a defiant edge.
Max didn’t answer immediately. He didn’t want this to turn into an argument, so he needed to dial it back a notch. “Do you think being with me means that you can’t also be a strong independent woman?”
“It’s possible. I’m not sure.”
“What about Shanna? She’s married to your father, who didn’t strike me as a weak man, yet she seemed to me to be a strong woman in her own right. You told me she’s a professor. Is there a problem there that I don’t know about?”
Sadie was silent again. Without knowing it, Max had just wandered into one of the weaknesses in her own position, something she’d thought about herself from time to time. She admired Shanna in both her professional and personal lives, and yet she seemed to have a very close relationship with her father.
“Do you want another beer?” she asked, trying to move the conversation back into more comfortable territory.
“Not now, thanks. What I want is for you to tell me why you can’t be a strong independent woman and also have a man in your life, a man who enjoys treating you as the special lady that you are.”
“Because when you treat me specially, it’s a form of control.”
“No, Sadie, it’s not always about control. I admit that it has been sometimes in the past, but we’re not in the past anymore. Do you honestly believe that I think less of you when I hold a door for you? You’re trying to take new rules for the professional world and use them in your private life, and it doesn’t work.”
Max was warming up to the subject and continued with passion. “We all use different rules for different times and places. We speak very differently when we’re in a museum or in a stadium, and we say very different things when we’re with a new acquaintance or with a close friend. Our behavior towards people in a staff meeting is very different from our behavior towards people, and maybe even some of the same people, when we’re with them in a bar.
“I see romance being lost because people are trying to use inappropriate rules in their private lives. The bedroom isn’t a boardroom, and it shouldn’t be treated as such. It’s a place for fun, a place to let yourself go. Do you remember when I carried you to the bedroom and then undressed you myself? Would you have felt the same if we’d agreed ahead of time to each be exactly the same, to go separately by mutual agreement into the bedroom and undress ourselves before climbing into bed, each from our own side. Where’s the romance in that? Being equal doesn’t require being the same. What would happen on the dance floor if one partner wasn’t allowed to lead?”
Max stopped and took a breath and a drink of his beer. He’d gotten a bit more wound up than he’d intended, but the more he thought about it, the more he realized that he felt strongly about the subject.
“Did you have a good time this weekend, Sadie?”
“Yes.”
“We weren’t fulfilling the same roles, but at no time did I consider you as a lesser being. If anything, I considered you as the more important one. Being a strong woman has nothing to do with who holds the door, it’s about what’s inside yourself. If you were a silly little airhead, I wouldn’t be remotely interested in you, but you’re not. You’re a fascinating woman with lots of experiences and ideas and the spunk to stand up to me when you disagree, and I’d like to get to know you better. What’s the matter with that?”
“I don’t know. I told you I can’t think when I’m with you.”
Max smiled his killer smile. “That should tell you something. We have an attraction to each other, Sadie, and we owe it to ourselves to see where it goes. In your blog you insist that women can be complete in themselves, and I agree to a certain point, but you’re talking about individual completeness, and that’s not the final stage of completeness. When a whole, complete woman and a whole, complete man come together to make a couple, it doesn’t diminish them, it expands their lives and opens up possibilities that aren’t accessible individually. It doesn’t take away from, it adds to.”
Max watched in horror as a tear rolled down Sadie’s face. He wondered if his impassioned monologue had just totally ruined any chances with her. He waited, but she said nothing. He put out a hand. “Sadie, will you come over here with me?”
Sadie bit her lip but then slowly got up and took a step towards Max, who patted his lap and still held his hand towards her. She hesitated and then went to him, and he leaned forward
and gently pulled her down. She still said nothing, but he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her against his chest, savoring the closeness of this wonderful women who had so unexpectedly come into his life.
After a few minutes, he spoke again, this time more quietly, his deep voice resonating against her as she leaned against him. “I want you to be a strong woman, Sadie. It’s one of the things I admire about you, but you can be strong and still let me into a corner of your life. I enjoy your company and want to spend more time with you. What do you think?”
Sadie paused and then inhaled raggedly. Max waited, and finally she exhaled again and whispered, “All right.”
With those two simple words, the weight of the last two days flew off Max, and he rejoiced as she put her arms around his neck. He tilted her face up and kissed her and then set her to the side so he could stand up, scoop her into his arms, and carry her to the bedroom.
* * *
Max was propped up against the backboard with Sadie tucked under his arm. They’d spent the last hour and a half reconnecting the way they had in Dallas, and they were both exhausted. Max felt even better than he had in Dallas, though, because Sadie seemed at peace with herself. He hoped it would continue, but for today at least, they were on the same page.
He leaned down and kissed her. “I don’t know about you, but I’m starved. Do you want to order something or go out?”
“Don’t you need to get back to Houston?”
Max frowned. “Are you trying to get rid of me?”
“No, I’m just wondering.”
“Well, wonder no more. I have no reason to rush back to Houston. Everything there is under control. Now, answer my question, please. Shall we order delivery or go out?”
“Maybe go out. I could really use a big plate of spaghetti.”
Max laughed. “Does sex make you hungry?”
“As a matter of fact, yes, it does, and sex with you makes me ravenous.”
Max pulled her close and kissed her again. “Okay, let’s shower and get dressed.”
Sadie started to get up, but he pulled her back. “One more thing before you go, mishka.”
“Yes?”
“If you ever put me through the same hell you have these last two days, I’ll put you over my knee and spank your sexy little backside ‘til it looks like a pair of ripe tomatoes!”
I’ll Have to Make It All Better, Won’t I?
Over the next month Sadie and Max spent as much time together as they could. Max would sometimes drive to Galveston in the evening and then return to Houston the next morning, but often it was the opposite. Since Sadie could work from anywhere, she started spending a lot of time in Houston, staying with Max in his WaterWall Place apartment.
Of course they spent long hours making love, but they did much more, too. In Galveston, they walked along the beach or sat on a seawall bench and people watched. They ate seafood and, with Sadie as a guide, explored the Strand Historic District, and Max enjoyed watching Sadie take pictures wherever they went. In Houston, they tried different restaurants, enjoyed the museums, and went to several concerts that Max always seemed able to get tickets for. It didn’t matter what they were doing as long as they were together. There was a powerful connection between them that made it seem they’d known each other for longer than they really had.
When Max needed to make another quick trip to Dallas, he convinced Sadie to come with him again, and this time they put on skates and made their way around the rink in the Galleria, laughing when one of them would wobble or make a misstep. Afterwards, they ate gelato, looking for all the world like the lovers they’d become.
All of this had left Sadie with a blog problem, because suddenly she wasn’t so adamant about keeping men ‘in their place,’ or maybe it was that she’d changed her mind about what that place might be. As she became more open with her readers about what was going on in her own life, she lost some longtime followers but also gained some new ones. In any case, she was too caught up in enjoying life with Max to worry about it excessively and did more work for professors to make up for any lag in blog income.
It was Wednesday evening, and Sadie and Max were lounging on the soft leather sofa in his apartment, watching a movie but not very closely. Suddenly, Sadie sat up. “I forgot to tell you something. Shanna called and asked us to dinner this Friday. What do you think?”
“It’s fine with me. You should tell her yes.” Then he smiled and asked, “Is this check out the boyfriend time? Am I going to be grilled about my intentions?”
Sadie laughed. “You’re much more likely to be grilled about some fine point in Russian history. Shanna’s a good cook, though, so you can at least look forward to the dinner.”
Max pulled her back down and kissed her. He was perfectly happy to spend time with Sadie’s family and so welcomed the invitation. He was starting to think this might be more than just a passing affair.
Friday evening, they turned up at the appointed hour with both wine and flowers in hand. Sadie had tried to convince Max it wasn’t necessary for a casual family dinner, but his Old-World manners wouldn’t allow him to arrive empty-handed.
Shanna kept checking Max out furtively and was impressed all over again with his good looks. It was more than that, though, and she hoped that Sadie could see what a great guy he was—courteous, funny, very knowledgeable, and a great conversationalist. If she weren’t married, she might just be interested in him herself.
Sadie’s father was delighted to discover how well-educated Max was in many of the same areas that interested him. He invited Max to call him ‘David,’ but Max preferred to call him ‘Professor,’ a title of honor in Russia, with its long history of respect for learning.
“Shanna, this lamb is perfect,” Max praised his hostess as they enjoyed dinner, and he wasn’t just being polite. The meal was worthy of a gourmet magazine, and it was obvious that Sadie hadn’t exaggerated her stepmother’s skill in the kitchen.
At the urging of Sadie’s father, Max told the saga of his family’s several-generation exile and of their final return to Russia only a couple decades earlier.
“It’s a fascinating story,” David commented thoughtfully. “It would make an interesting book.”
“Oh, I don’t think we’re that interesting,” replied Max with a smile. “Many other families have similar stories. It was a difficult period in our history, but I hope that’s behind us now.”
“St. Petersburg is such a fantastic city, though,” put in Shanna as she poured more coffee for everyone. “You’re lucky to be from a city like that.”
“I can’t argue with you there,” Max agreed, nodding. “I think everyone who calls St. Petersburg home feels lucky to do so.”
“Why?” asked Sadie. “What’s so special about St. Petersburg?”
“Maybe I should take you and show you,” replied Max with a smile.
Before Sadie could respond, her father said, “St. Petersburg is like a cultured lady, lovely both on the surface and underneath. It’s surprisingly beautiful in any season, and it’s full to overflowing with cultural offerings of every type, like the Kirov that you saw a couple months ago. It’s a world-class city in every way.”
“But cold,” added Shanna. “It’s the most northerly major city in the world.”
“Not a problem,” said Max with a smile. “We Russians are hardy people and take snow and ice in stride. In fact, we believe that a brief swim in freezing water is healthy.”
Sadie made a face and shivered at the very thought. She was a dyed-in-the-wool Southern girl whose closet overflowed with sandals. “If we ever go to St. Petersburg, make sure it’s in the summer.”
Max laughed. In fact, he’d been thinking more and more lately about wanting to take Sadie to meet his family and let her see where he came from, but until now, he’d kept the idea to himself.
“Why don’t we move to the living room,” suggested Shanna. “Let me just put a few of these things in the kitchen and I’ll join you.” She p
icked up several items as the others rose.
“Can I get you a drink, Max?” offered David. “I have a delightful brandy that’s the perfect ending to a fine meal.”
“Just a small amount, thank you, Professor,” replied Max as he followed his host into the living room. “I’m driving.”
Sadie held back and helped Shanna carry the last things into the kitchen. Once they were together, Sadie turned towards Shanna with a frown on her face. “Why do you let him call you Shanna?”
Her stepmother laughed lightly. “Because it’s my name?”
“That’s not what I mean. He’s calling Dad ‘Professor,’ but he’s calling you Shanna. You’re a professor, too. He’s doing that male thing I hate.”
“I asked him to call me Shanna.”
“Well, Dad asked him to call him David, but he’s calling him Professor instead. I think it’s very sexist for him to call Dad ‘Professor’ and you ‘Shanna.’ It’s like your being a professor doesn’t count as much.” She scowled and sat down on a stool at the island.
Shanna laughed again. She took life as it came and didn’t get all excited about most things. “Maybe I hear it as a compliment. Your father’s welcome to the title of Professor. I’d rather be just plain Shanna when I’m entertaining non-colleagues. I like to think I don’t look like the stereotypical professor, while your father could easily play the part of a distinguished professor in a TV show.”
Sadie wasn’t mollified. “Max doesn’t know how you feel, though. He just automatically gave Dad the title and not you.”
“Sadie, don’t make a problem where there isn’t one. If that’s the biggest complaint you have about Max, you should hold on to him tightly.” With that, she motioned Sadie to follow her out to join the men.
As it had at dinner, conversation flowed easily, and it was late when Max and Sadie finally took their leave. Both David and Shanna were impressed with this man that Sadie was involved with and hoped that she wouldn’t toss the relationship aside as she had with so many others in the past.