Threads of Faith

by Andrea Boeshaar

  The men entered with Mark Dunbar on their heels.

  “I’m happy to see you all made it safely home from Green Bay.” He and his family, along with Adeline, Will, and the baby, had left Saturday. Mark’s gaze came to rest on Julianna. “That man you told me about, that love of your life who you met in London . . . ” He clapped Jeremy on the shoulder and grinned sheepishly. “Here he is!”

  Julianna felt herself pale as Jeremy set down the valises near the parlor’s settee.

  “Great balls of fire, Miss Wayland, I didn’t realize you loved me so much until Mr. Dunbar, here, told me.”

  Daniel gave her a hard, quizzical stare, and Julianna felt her temples begin to throb.

  “I can explain.” The words were but a whisper. She looked at Mark, then Jeremy. “I’m sorry, but there’s been a terrible misunderstanding.”

  Daniel turned. “Listen, fellas, it’s been a long day. Let’s leave the ladies and resume this conversation in the morning.”

  Julianna lowered her head and kept her eyes on one of the polished floorboards. What a mess, and all because of Jeremy’s persistence and Mark’s assuming nature.

  Mrs. Sundberg had seen the men out the door and returned to stand near Julianna. “Let’s unpack, and I will pour us some cool tea. I store it in a jar and lower it into the well where it remains very cold and tastes so refreshing.”

  “Momma, I’d like some too.” Agnes picked up her bag and dragged it toward the bedroom.

  Mrs. Sundberg’s gaze remained on Julianna. “No one will force you to go with Jeremy.”

  “Maybe Daniel—”

  “No, he will not.” Kindness shone from her blue eyes, their color more pronounced because of Mrs. Sundberg’s black dress. “If you want to stay with Agnes and me, then so be it.”

  Julianna prayed it was that simple.

  An hour or so later Daniel returned. “Julianna, I must talk to you.”

  She steeled herself. Here it comes.

  “Let’s go for a ride. We’ll take Agnes along for propriety’s sake.”

  Amazingly the girl had overheard the suggestion from the next room. “Oh, yes . . . I’ll come along.” She trotted toward them. “I’m not too tired for another buggy ride, especially if it’s a joyride.”

  Daniel grinned, but he still didn’t look happy, and that alarmed Julianna.

  “Oh, all right. Give me a moment.” She collected her lightweight shawl and tied her hat’s ribbon beneath her chin. As she strode for the door, Mrs. Sundberg caught her elbow.

  “Make your wishes known.” She spoke the hushed words close to Julianna’s ear. “If you want to stay here, then tell Daniel. He will agree to it.”

  “Thank you.” Despite the confidence her tone exuded, Julianna wasn’t so sure. Daniel had been cool toward her for days now.

  They left the Sundbergs’ apartment and strolled to the walk and to an awaiting buggy.

  “Where are we going?”

  “You’ll see.” Daniel allowed Agnes to sit beside him in the front seat before he helped Julianna into the back. His tone sounded rather ominous, but she managed to smile at Agnes.

  Daniel climbed aboard and took up the horses’ reins. A nearly full moon rose above the lake in glowing splendor. When they’d gone a short distance out of town, he pulled over and halted.

  “Agnes, I must talk to Julianna about a private matter. We’ll stand just a few feet away, and I’ll tether the horses around this sapling.” He nodded toward the small but sturdy-looking tree nearby. “Will you be all right alone for just a few minutes?”

  “I’ll be fine, Daniel. I’m almost grown up now.”

  Julianna smiled at the remark and noted Daniel’s amused expression . . . until he looked her way. Her heart ached as his expression turned back to stone. With some trepidation she accepted his hand and got down from the buggy. She followed his lead across a grassy parcel that jutted out over the lake, providing a clear view of Manitowoc’s harbor.

  Daniel pointed to the ship closest to them. “Can you see that steamer?”

  Julianna dipped her head. “Yes.”

  “It leaves tomorrow at noon, and I’ll be on board.”

  The news came as no surprise, although sorrow welled up inside her. It was then Julianna realized she’d held out a thread of hope that he’d change his mind and stay. What lunacy!

  “I won’t be around to fend off Kidwell. He’s in the tavern tonight playing cards.”

  “No matter. I can take care of meself.”

  Daniel didn’t acknowledge her remark. “If there’s trouble, either later tonight when he’s had one too many drinks or tomorrow after he’s sobered up, you’ll have to alert the sheriff.”

  Julianna grimaced. The last thing she wanted to deal with was a drunken seafaring man. “I’m not going with Jeremy. I want to stay here.”

  “I figured as much.”

  “Mark assumed I was pining over some man because I said I never want to get married.”

  “You owe me no explanations, Julianna.”

  The note of disinterest in his tone discouraged her from saying more. He’d once told her he cared. When had he stopped? Oh, but what difference did it make anyhow?

  “I have something to tell you, and it’s not pleasant, I’m afraid.”

  What else could there be?

  “George grew particularly curious about you the moment he met you, so he hired an investigator in London.”

  “What?” She tipped her head. “Curious about me?”

  “Allow me to finish, please.”

  Julianna folded her arms.

  “The investigator found Flora, and she verified everything George wanted to know.”

  “Like what?”

  “Like . . . ” Daniel’s shoulders rose with his deep inhalation. “ . . . your mother’s name and her occupation. Flora basically verified everything you’d said.”

  “It’s the truth!”

  “Yes, and it led to George uncovering your father’s true identity.”

  Julianna felt her jaw drop. “Me father?”

  Beneath the moon’s bright glow, she saw his nod. “Julianna, as much as you dislike George Ramsey, he is your biological father.”

  It took a second to register, but then Julianna burst out in laughter. “That’s ridiculous. A fable if I ever heard one!”

  “I’m afraid it’s the truth. George recognized you because, he said, you’re the spitting image of your mother. He is—was—the sailor known as Christopher Columbus.”

  “No . . . ” Incredulity made her head spin.

  Daniel reached for her elbow.

  She pulled away. “But I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. Flora said me father was a scoundrel, and I knew from the instant I met George Ramsey that he was one too.”

  “That’s not true. And if it’s any consolation, George tried to find your mother and you.”

  “Find us? Well, he didn’t try very hard now, did he?”

  Daniel didn’t answer.

  “So the scoundrel is filthy rich while his daughter and her half-sister starve and nearly freeze to death in the winter’s cold.” Julianna nodded. “Sounds like something George Ramsey would allow to happen.”

  “Stop it, Julianna. You don’t know George. He’s an honorable man.”

  “Honorable in what way?”

  “He told me that he loved your mother very much.”

  “A lot of good that did me—or her.” Then she remembered the document she signed. “So that’s why Mr. Ramsey”—the name almost choked her—“that’s why he insisted I sign a contract.” She’d heard about indiscretionary scandals. Mr. Tolbert had needed to sweep a few under the rug himself. “He feared I’d cause a stir and make demands.”

  “Yes.” Daniel’s admittance was nearly inaudible.

  “And you knew all along?”

  He paused. “Yes, I did.”

  “But I trusted you, and you purposely misled me.” Her fists clenched. “Not that it matters. I don’t want a si
ngle coin from George Ramsey. But you—”

  “That’s right. I betrayed you, Julianna. You have good reason to hate me. My loyalties were put to the test, and George took precedence over my family here—and even my feelings for you.”

  “You’re a fool, Captain Sundberg. Honorable, yes, but a fool.”

  “So hate me for it, Julianna. That’s what I want.”

  “Why?

  “Because I can never love you, and there’s no future in pining over a man with whom there is no future.”

  At his self-deception the fight left her. He really thought wealth would make him happy? Suddenly she pitied the man before her. “It sounds like you hate yourself more than I ever could. Besides”—she turned toward the calm lake waters—“I could never hate you.”

  “As you wish.” His voice dripped with painful indifference. “However, there’s something more you need to know.”

  “What is it?” Julianna remained with her back to him. Her heart already felt numb. What more could he say to hurt her?

  “Flora is dead.”

  “What?” She spun around. “No! How can it be?”

  “It’s true. I’m sorry.” His tone sounded compassionate, more like the Captain Daniel Sundberg she’d come to love. “Your sister died as of a result of her frequent and heavy drinking. There was nothing you or anyone could have done to save her.”

  Tears blurred her vision, and her chin trembled, but Julianna willed herself not to cry. “Serves her right, the lush.” Anguish squeezed her heart until she felt like doubling over. Her sister. Flora. Dead!

  Daniel stepped forward and collected her in his arms. She fell against him.

  “She was probably sick a long while, little one.” He murmured the words softly against her temple. “It wouldn’t have mattered if you’d been there to care for her or not.”

  Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Tears never solved anything. Isn’t that what Flora always told her? Flora scoffed at tears, and Julianna could still imagine the sting of her sister’s slap across her face for being such a baby. Instead Julianna forced herself to listen to the steady, rhythmical beat of Daniel’s heart.

  “Don’t leave me,” she breathed. “Everyone in the world has left me. Please . . . ” She pulled back and stared up into Daniel’s face and blinked away more unwanted moisture. “ . . . please, don’t go.”

  “Listen to me.” The hardened sea captain returned to his voice, and Daniel gripped her chin. “Don’t beg. Not now. Not ever again.” He sternly ground out each vowel. “You’re a Ramsey, and Ramseys never beg.”

  Anger flashed and exploded through Julianna’s being. She struggled out of his embrace and pushed him away. She took several steps back. “I’ll never be a Ramsey, and you hear me.” She pointed a finger at him. “I’m going to repay every coin George Ramsey spent on me, on me clothes, shoes, hats—everything!”

  “I never used a cent of George’s money, Julianna. I’ve told you that before. I’m a man of means and important in my own right.”

  “But what sort of man are you really once that means and importance is stripped away? A life on the street is only a bad business decision or addictive habit away.” A cynical guffaw came from somewhere deep within her. “I’ve shared scraps with wealthier men than you and George Ramsey in London’s gutter.”

  Daniel folded his arms and gave her a bored stare. “Are you quite finished?”

  “Yes, but I’m very disappointed in you, Daniel Sundberg, and I was wrong. I’ll admit it now. You’re not the honorable man I thought.”

  She ran past him and to the buggy, quickly stuffing her sorrow and disbelief so deep inside herself that she could barely breathe. But she preferred it to upsetting Agnes. Crawling up into the backseat, she actually smiled at the girl.

  “Julianna? Are you all right?”

  “I’ll be fine.” Once the shock wears off. “My sister died.” She could say that much. She folded her hands tightly in her lap. “Now I know how you and your family must feel, losing Mr. Sundberg.”

  “Oh, Julianna . . . ” Agnes scampered into the seat beside her then hugged her arm. “It hurts, doesn’t it?”

  “Yes,” she eked out. A single tear leaked from the corner of her eye. She blinked, unwilling to shed more.

  Daniel took his time returning to the buggy. He said nothing as he untied the reins and climbed in. Moments later they rode in silence back to the shop.

  Sunshine streamed through the front windows of the hotel lobby as Daniel checked out. Mark stood behind the counter and stamped his bill PAID IN FULL. They exchanged the usual pleasantries, and then Daniel left for his sister Adeline’s home. Located west of town, the saltbox-styled house looked freshly painted and well kept.

  Adeline invited him in and offered him a cup of coffee. He refused. “I have a ship to board.”

  “Thank you for seeing me before you left.”

  “I knew I’d never hear the end of it if I didn’t.” He grinned.

  She narrowed her gaze and set her hands on her rounded hips. “I would have hunted you down all the way to New York City.”

  “I’m sure of it.” Daniel’s smile grew.

  Baby Jacob squawked, and Adeline lifted him from his cradle. Daniel kissed the boy’s forehead. “Good-bye, little man. Stay healthy.”

  Adeline slung one arm around his neck and hugged him tightly. She stepped back. “When will you return?”

  “I don’t know.” Daniel hadn’t planned on coming back, but he couldn’t bring himself to say so.

  “I wish you Godspeed, my brother.”

  He placed a kiss on her cheek.

  Then it was back to town, where he returned the rented buggy and hired a man to check his valise on the steamer. He walked the rest of the way to his mother’s shop, enjoying the feeling of stretching his legs before embarking on a two-day journey wrought with inactivity.

  The bell above the door signaled his entry into the shop. His mother and Agnes glanced up from a garment they’d been inspecting.

  “I’m leaving for New York and wanted to say good-bye.”

  Agnes pouted but neither cried nor said a word. She simply hugged Daniel around the waist.

  He kissed the crown of her head. “Be good for your momma.”

  She nodded before pulling away and running out of the shop.

  Daniel refused to let his heart feel anything but anticipation of his journey back home—and yes, New York was his home.

  Mor crossed the distance and embraced him. “Thank you for everything.”

  He inclined his head. “A bank account is set up in your name. There’s one in Julianna’s name as well. Use it for whatever you need and want. The money’s there.”

  Her blue eyes filled with unshed emotion. “I don’t know what we would have done without you.”

  Daniel pulled his mother close for one last good-bye. “Where’s Julianna?”

  Mor worked her lips together as if to choose her next words carefully. “She is very upset, Daniel, and with good reason.”

  “I know.” He figured she’d never want to see him again. “Tell her good-bye for me and . . . ” He didn’t want to say it, and yet he couldn’t hold it back either. “Don’t let her marry Kidwell, all right? She has other options.”

  His mother momentarily considered the request. “What do you care if she marries that man or not?”

  “I care—and my feelings spread beyond Julianna.” He made purposeful strides toward the door.

  “We love you too, Daniel. I love you, your sisters love you—and so does Julianna.”

  Her words snuck up on him, engulfed him, but he wrestled to be free of emotion that would get him nowhere in life. He’d marry Reagan and pour himself into Ramsey Enterprises. That was the plan. Love had no part of it.

  Leaving the shop, Daniel closed the door behind him with more force than necessary.

  CHAPTER 24

  A GUST OF COLD November wind blew through the nearly barren treetops. From the Ramseys’ large dining r
oom windows Daniel watched one withered remnant succumb to the battering breeze, tumble to the ground, and skip down the road. He felt as dead as that leaf inside.

  The last four months had been sheer misery. More often than not Daniel’s mind was in Wisconsin, not in New York. He couldn’t seem to focus on bank statements; he got distracted at business dinners. And now . . . he ought to be listening as the Ramseys planned for the impending trip to London, but Daniel wondered, instead, what Julianna did at this time of morning. Straightening merchandise in Mor’s store? Except she’d moved on from the shop now.

  Daniel glanced down at Adeline’s folded letter. Her third so far. Since returning to New York Daniel had personally seen to it that he received his mail, and back in July, Adeline wrote that Julianna had refused Kidwell’s offer. Apparently the man had left for St. Louis, where he’d hoped to join a wagon train going west. What a relief it had been to learn the news. In late September she wrote again to say that her brother-in-law Mark was courting a local schoolteacher. And now this latest missive informed him that Agnes would star in the Christmas play at school and that little Jacob was nearly six months old already. Will and his father still hadn’t solved the problems concerning their companies’ shipping needs, and Julianna accepted Aunt Mary’s offer to move to Green Bay.

  She’s been so utterly depressed lately, Adeline penned. She won’t talk to anyone, not even Mor or Reverend Wollums, the pastor in Green Bay. I suspect Julianna regrets that she turned down Mr. Kidwell’s marriage proposal. Perhaps living in the country will do her some good.

  Kidwell’s offer? Julianna didn’t regret that. Daniel felt certain of it. The man she loved was himself, just as she’d vowed. Daniel didn’t doubt it for an instant. Perhaps she missed him just as much as Daniel missed her. He could only hope . . .

  “Did you hear what I said, son?”

  Daniel glanced over his shoulder and saw the lines in George’s forehead deepen. “No, sorry.” He turned. “My mind was elsewhere.”

  “It’s been there quite often of late.”

  Daniel replied with an apologetic shrug and saw Eliza set her delicate porcelain teacup down on its matching saucer.