I Just Wanna Be Yours

by Lucinda John

  As I sat back replying to some emails from my real estate agent in regards to some potential clients, my mind wandered off to Tyreema. It had been a week since I found her on the ground battered and brought her to the hospital, but for some reason, I couldn’t shake her off my mind. It was as if our spirits connected the moment I picked her bruised body up off the ground and carried her to the car.

  When my mom was alive, she used to always talk to me about this magnetic pull you would feel towards your soulmate. She would always tell me the story how she met my father, how she was just running to the corner store to get her mother some bacon for breakfast, and how she ended up bumping into the love of her life. She expressed how she knew my father was her soulmate, because his spirit kept tugging at hers.

  For some reason, as she laid in the hospital bed, I felt myself get upset when my eyes fell on the ring that laid neatly on her finger. I examined the stones that decorated the band and concluded that her dude had some money. What fucked me up in the head was how he wasn’t there for her. She’d just lost their seed, and that nigga was nowhere to be found. In some weird way, that reminded me of what I went through with Xandy. When Xandy lost our baby, she was too busy chasing her next high, leaving me to grieve the loss of our baby alone.

  We got the key to the streets, we got the key to the streets.

  My phone rang alerting me that Sage was calling.

  “What’s good nigga?” I answered the phone.

  “Aye bruh, what’s good. Just checking to see if you sliding through with Xandy tonight?” He asked.

  “You already know I’m not trying to fuck with her like that.” I answered annoyed.

  “Damn fam, I already invited her.” He said, causing me to suck my teeth. “You might as well come with her.” He chuckled.

  “That shit ain’t funny.” I snapped.

  “I don’t see what’s the big deal; y’all got history.”

  “It ain’t even like that between us no more.”

  “Maybe you making yourself think that.”

  “Fuck outta here with that; I’m done with her like that. I can’t go back man; too many demons I’d be forced to battle if I do.”

  “Maybe it’s time to face them demons, bruh. You can’t keep running from that shit forever.” He reasoned.

  “Lush got that for you whenever you ready.” I said changing the subject.

  “I’m ready.” He replied.

  “You got your money straight?” I asked, making sure he had both me and the connect’s money.

  “Bruh, don’t even try to play me. I got that.”

  “Tight work.”

  “Man, when y’all gonna start trusting a nigga with more work?” He asked.

  “When your probation period is over.” I replied.

  “Probation?” He groaned. “You act like I ain’t gon’ come through.”

  “I know you will, but shit these ain’t no regular people we dealing with. These Russians will kill you and every mother fucker that ever said ‘Hi’ to you when it comes to their money.” I stressed.

  “I feel you, but I’m a grown man about mine. I need to start putting folks on soon before I start beefing out here in the streets. I can’t do that with that lil’ bit y’all giving me.”

  “I hear you, bruh. Just hold down the fort; good things come to those that wait.” I said. “Plus, you still young. Continue to get your feet wet before you dive in.” I reasoned.

  “I been got my feet wet, matter fact I been swimming laps in this shit. A nigga ready to dive for real.”

  “I’ll see, let’s turn up tonight and talk business later.”

  “Bet.”

  “Iight bruh, holla at you, later. One.”

  “One.” Sage replied before hanging up the phone.

  Just as I placed my phone down in the cup holder, Xandy was making her way back to the car. She wore a smile on her face, which could only mean that she got the job. I watched as she used her hand to block the sun out of her eyes, as she strutted her sexy ass to the passenger seat.

  “I got the job!” She squealed the moment she sat down.

  “Tight work.” I replied truly happy for her.

  “I turn up, tonight, at Sage’s party, then start work fresh in the morning.” She said, as she danced in her seat.

  “No doubt.”

  “Saire, I need a favor.”

  “What is it?” I asked her never taking my eyes off the road.

  “Do you mind giving me some money so I can get ready for tonight?” She asked.

  I looked over at her and contemplated if I wanted to hand her money. I know she’s been clean for almost a year, but I didn’t want her to relapse. I knew once she started working she would have access to her own money, but I still didn’t want to feel like I was responsible for giving her the money that she used to buy drugs with.

  “Trust me, Saire. I only want to get my hair, nails, and toes done, grab me a banging ass dress and some bad ass shoes. I’m not thinking about them Flakkas.” She assured me.

  “I need something to wear too. We might as well roll together.” I lied.

  I had two walk-in closets, one for all my grown man attire and dress shoes, and the other for all my casual wear and sneakers. I had enough clothes to wear, but I wasn’t going to have Xandy possibly relapsing being on my hands. I figured another suit to add to the collection wouldn’t hurt as I made my way to the 1-95 heading towards Miami.

  * * *

  “Can you come help me with my dress?” Xandy asked, as I sat in the living room waiting for her.

  This was the second time I’ve been in this apartment since she moved in, and it felt weird. Xandy had the place well-kept; she even moved some furniture around to her personal liking. Between the pot roast and potatoes she cooked earlier, and the sweet lavender candle that burned, I wasn’t sure what made the house smell better. I definitely had to give her props, because she was making all the necessary changes to get herself together.

  “You don’t even have the dress on.” I said, as I looked over her naked body.

  “I know, because I need your help.” She smiled.

  “Come on, man. Stop playing.”

  “I’m not playing,” she replied, walking over to me with her long extensions flowing down her back.

  “Remember this?” She asked, turning around and giving me a clear view of my name that decorated her back surrounded by a bunch of colorful flowers.

  “Put the dress on.” I replied feeling my throat get dry.

  No matter how much I tried to stop myself from looking at Xandy like that, the print in my pants wouldn’t allow me to ignore her sexy ass. She was a sexy stallion standing before me in her naked glory, and I was a man that hadn’t had pussy in days. I didn’t move an inch as she made her way over to me walking slowly on her tippy toes.

  “Let me remind you why you fell in love with me, Saire.” She whispered, as her body made contact with mine.

  The only thing that was separating us was the three-piece Armani suit that I wore.

  “Mm, you smell so good, Daddy.” She said, as she kissed that spot on my neck that only she knew about. “Does this spot still drive you crazy?” She asked, before running her tongue across it causing my dick to swell up.

  “Fuck!” I yelled, as I lifted her up and carried her to the bed.

  Laying her body down, I ran my hand from her neck down her stomach stopping at her pussy. Spreading her pussy lips, I slipped my finger in her gooey honey pot. Her wetness immediately ran down my fingers as I stuck it in and out of her.

  “Mmm, Daddy.” She cooed, as she rotated her hips into my hand.

  Flipping her over to her stomach, I reached in my wallet and pulled out a Magnum. Tearing it open, I held the condom in my mouth, as I pulled out my pornstar-sized dick. I was a nice eleven inches of thick cut meat. My veins protruded as I rolled the condom down my shaft.

  “Uhhhhhhhh!!” We both moane
d as I entered her.

  Pulling her ass closer to me, I pushed her back down on the bed so she could be in that perfect arched position. If dick was what she wanted, then dick was what she was going to get, but it wouldn’t change the way I felt when it came to her.

  “Shit.” I groaned, as I pumped in and out of her.

  Her kitty was so wet that I could hear it purring to me with each stroke I gave it.

  “Nah, don’t run. You wanted this dick, so take this shit.” I warned as I held her firmly by her waist. I started picking up the pace, causing her to go crazy.

  “Ohhhhh, SAIRRRRRRRRRRRE! OH! OH! OH! Gawwwwwwwwwd!” She cried out, as I fucked her with no mercy.

  We wasn’t making love; I was straight tearing up that pussy up. This was the only way I knew how to take out all my frustrations on her without physically hitting her. My eyes became a little misty as I thought of all the pain I endured dealing with her and her addiction. I loved this girl with all my heart, so I was ready to start a family, settle down, and give her the world, but I wasn’t worthy enough to her. She chose the drug over me, our child, and over us, and that was something I couldn’t see myself forgiving. Even if I found it in my heart to forgive her, I still wouldn’t be able to fuck with her on the level we were on before.

  “Oh shit, I’m cummmmmmmmmming!” She sang as her wetness drenched my dick.

  A few strokes later, I pulled out and started coming in the condom. Walking to the bathroom, I removed the condom off my dick and flushed it down the toilet. Looking down at my now wrinkled suit, I knew I had no choice but to go home and change before heading to the party.

  “Be ready to go when I come back.” I said walking back into the bedroom.

  “Where are you going?” She asked.

  “Home to change.”

  “Why don’t you wait for me and we can go together.”

  “Nah, y’all women take forever to get dressed; I’ll be back in a lil’ bit.” I replied, making my way out of the room.

  The reality was that I didn’t want her to know where I laid my head at. I couldn’t allow her to get back where she wanted to be; it wasn’t going to work out. Things between us were too tarnished to even rekindle that flame we once had. I had no problem kicking it with her or even being there if she needed me, but I had to make things clear that a relationship was something I grew out of wanting with her.

  I keep my hoes in check, you buy Nikes for yours, say they want that loud, I’mma bring the noise.

  2 Chainz, “Where You Been” blasted through the speakers, as I made my way into the banquet hall with Xandy on my trail. She was looking stunning in a black, long, off-the-shoulder gown. The material of the dress held onto her curves making her ass appear fatter than what is already was. The long slit in the side of the dress displayed her long legs and the two-hundred-dollar pair of heels I just copped for her.

  We made our way up the circular crystal stairs to the massive VIP area. I had to give Sage his props; this place he rented out for his party was some shit that a king and queen would use for their ball. Everything was beautifully decorated with white and black drapes and decorations giving it that grown and sexy look he was going for. I spotted Sage in the corner chopping it up with one of his homies, so I decided to make my way over to them.

  “This shit lit.” I said giving my brother dap.

  “Damn, nigga. Took your ass long enough to get here.” He smirked, looking over my shoulder at Xandy, who was sitting at the table bobbing her head to the music.

  “Man, I had to go back home and change.” I replied.

  “Why? You had pussy juice all over ya.” He laughed.

  “Maybe; nigga mind your business.” I replied.

  “I knew you was going to hit that again.”

  “It’s not even like that man; she gave me the pussy, I took it. Besides that, I’m not tryna rock with her like that no more.” I said.

  “Make sure you tell her that shit before she start getting false hope and shit.” He lectured.

  “Nigga, I know. Talking to me like I’m the little brother. Nigga, yo young ass don’t know shit about love yet.” I joked.

  “I do. I met the love of my life a few weeks back. I just pray she come through or else I’mma have to go looking for her ass.” Sage replied.

  “You talking about that dime piece you bumped into in the parking lot?” His friend asked.

  “Yes, her… Naria.” He replied, causing my ears to perk up.

  “What did you say her name was again?” I asked.

  “Naria…. Man, don’t tell me you fucking her bruh.” He groaned.

  “Nah, but I think that’s the best friend of the chick I was telling you about.”

  “How she look?” He asked me.

  “She was thick as fuck with this short, blond, curly do. She had an arms sleeve.”

  “She had a leg sleeve too?” He eagerly asked.

  “Nah, well I don’t know; she was wearing sweats.”

  “That’s probably her. That’s my chick, though, so keep that R. Kelly and Usher “Same Girl” type shit for another bitch. I ain’t sharing her.” He replied.

  “That chick too damn feisty for me. You can have her.”

  “I like my women like I like my fried chicken, spicy and feisty.” He clowned.

  “You a fool.”

  “You ain’t know.” He replied, doing the running man to the “My Boo” song that played.

  Chapter 11

  Naria

  “Good thing Jerecho is out of town. I was prepared to fight his ass to let you come out tonight.” I said, as I fixed the halo crown braid I created in Tyreema’s hair.

  “Girl, bye. I was coming out regardless; I was sick and tired of being on bed rest.” She sighed.

  “I know; look like all yo ass was doing was laying down, getting dick, and eating. Please tell me you back on them pills.

  “Yes, I’m not trying to get pregnant again. The feeling of losing a baby is one I would never want to experience, again, and I wouldn’t wish that shit on my worst enemy.” She replied.

  “I would.” I giggled.

  “That’s because your ass is petty and evil.”

  “Petty, yes. Evil, nah.” I replied, applying primer to her face so I could beat it to the godz.

  “Where is Jordynn?” Tyreema asked.

  “She went to go cop some weed girl.”

  “I wonder what she doing to get that weed. We both know that girl don’t do shit with herself but sit in the house all day then leave whenever a nigga bangs through her line.” Tyreema fussed.

  “Shit, as long as the weed is nice and strong, I’m good. I’m sick and tired of talking to this girl about the same thing. Y’all both got being hard-headed in common.” I countered, as I colored in her eyebrows to perfection.

  “You a mess.” She laughed.

  “A hot one at that.” I added with a few giggles of my own.

  “We mad late for this party.” Tyreema said, as I finished her make-up.

  “Girl, if this nigga really wants me like he claims to want me, he’ll wait.” She winked.

  “You thinking about fucking with him?”

  “Nah, I might let him wine and dine me, dick me down a few times if his stroke game is good, then go about my business.” I replied.

  “You gotta stop making these dudes pay for what Detric did to you.”

  “I’m good on all that relationship mess. I ain’t got the sanity or the patience to deal with a no-good ass nigga. Shit, fucking around with these dogs, I’d end up in jail behind killing his ass.” I truthfully replied.

  My attitude was too nasty; I suffered from bad anger issues, and I was quick to knuckle up with a nigga, which may have been the reason why I was single. I’ve accepted that there wouldn’t be a nigga that could bring me down a notch so I decided to do me. I was going to do these niggas how they did us females.

  I looked over at my bestie, who
was dressed in a black halter, corset crop top, with the matching cut-out, bandaged skirt that I created exclusively for her. Her lady lumps were on full display in this outfit in a classy way. Tyreema hated to show too much in fear of looking trashy; therefore; I had to make her outfits sexy without revealing too much cleavage.

  I, on the other hand, was all for showing off the goods. I wasn’t trashy with it like Jordynn, but I showed off enough to have a nigga getting slapped behind the head by his bitch for drooling too hard. The ivory, strapless, sexy, laced, bodycon dress I wore wrapped around my body like a second layer of skin.

  Running my fingers through my curls, I made sure my lips were popping before adding a piece of Winterfresh gum in my mouth. I grabbed my ivory, around the ankles, pumps and put them on my feet. Grabbing my red clutch that matched my red lipstick, I gave myself a final look over and was finally ready to head to this party two hours late.

  “About time bitch; we were getting ready to leave you.” I snapped, when Jordynn finally walked through the door.

  “My bad; I had to let this nigga whisper sweet nothings in my ears to get this shit.” She said, passing me a bag that had about an ounce of Guava Kush in it.

  “Damn, this some good shit.” I replied, inhaling the fumes from the bag.

  “I can smell that shit all the way from here.” Tyreema added.

  “Y’all look cute.” Jordynn said giving props.

  “You do, too.” Tyreema replied.

  Jordynn finally decided to cover up some, as she wore a short, tight, black, freak me dress that had two splits coming up to her mid-thigh.

  “Let’s roll then.” Jordynn said, as she led the way to my car.

  High and feeling lovely, we walked in Sage’s party now three hours late. The party was in full swing as bitches popped their asses on niggas who needed their homeboys to stand behind them and hold them in place. The way the banquet hall was decorated had me in awe. From the outside, there was no way to tell the inside would look this elegant.