by Jamie Pope
He grinned at her and smoothed his hand down her back. “Where will I be while you are marrying all these other men? Unless you plan on doing away with me.”
“I don’t know where you’ll be.” They had been joking, but there was a seriousness in her voice that he couldn’t ignore.
“Are you sure you’re okay with me going in to Miami for the meeting with Florida General?”
“You’re better than Florida General. It’s the worst hospital in the city. If you were hurt, I wouldn’t want you to be treated there.”
“But I could turn things around, or at least help to.”
“You’re talented and brilliant and sexy, and they would be lucky to have you. You’ll be fine wherever you end up.”
“Cricket, I...” He wanted to say that he loved her, but something stopped him. He hoped he had been reading too much into it, but the past couple of days, she’d been talking as if he had plans of going through this journey without her.
Wherever you end up. You have to decide what you want.
It was never we. It bothered him, and more than that, he worried about what she saw for their future.
“What is it?” She looked up at him.
“I’m not staying overnight in Miami. I’ll be back on the last ferry.”
“I’ll pick you up.”
“This is just a meeting. I don’t even know if I want the job. I have a few options. I thought I would investigate this one in case you wanted to stay close to home.”
“I want you to go where you’ll be happy.” She kissed his cheek. “Come on, let’s get you to the ferry. You don’t want to be late.”
Chapter 15
When Cricket arrived back at the house after dropping Elias off at the ferry, she noticed a familiar car parked in the driveway. She would recognize her mother’s sleek black Aston Martin anywhere. Part of Cricket wanted to turn her car around and hide out in the ice cream parlor downtown for the next few hours, gorging herself on hot-fudge sundaes until she was sure her mother had left.
But she knew she couldn’t do that. For all her mother’s faults, she hadn’t raised a woman who ran away from conflict. Cricket knew that this conversation had to happen. Realistically she knew she couldn’t go on not speaking to her mother. Her family was so small. There was no way it could continue to be fractured.
Cricket got out of her car, but instead of walking inside her house, she walked around to the back and found her mother sitting on the sand just beyond the house. Her shoes were off, her toes buried in the cool sand. It wasn’t a side of her mother that Cricket saw often. But she had seen it before. They used to vacation on this island. And there had been one glorious summer when Cricket had both of her parents there for an entire two months. Her mother had hurt her knee in an accident and couldn’t work, and her father had decided to take off time to be with them. It was one of the few times in Cricket’s life when she’d felt like she had a real family. A normal family that spent time together.
“I thought you said that one of the rudest things a person could do was drop by unexpectedly.”
“That doesn’t apply to mothers.” Dr. Lundy looked up at her. “Mothers are allowed to say and do rude things to their daughters, and their daughters are just supposed to know that their mothers love them and respect them and don’t mean to hurt them.”
“Hmm.” Cricket sat next to her mother. “Is that right?”
“Yes.” She was quiet for a moment. “You’re really in love with him, aren’t you?”
“From the day I met him.”
“And he’s good to you, isn’t he? He quit his job at my hospital. I’ve heard he’s been looking around the country. I’ve gotten calls about him already.”
“He’s a damn good doctor. I hope you recognize that. If he treats his patients anywhere near as good as he treats me, you shouldn’t let him go.”
“He’s not playing hardball, is he? This isn’t a ploy to force my hand.”
“No, Mom. It’s not about his job. It never was. The way you carry on about it makes me feel like you think that somebody like Elias couldn’t possibly be in love with someone like me. That I’m so stupid, I would allow this man to get me pregnant and marry me in order to further his career. There are more important things than work. But it doesn’t seem that way to you.”
“Of course he could fall in love with you. You’re beautiful and brilliant. I’m your mother. I don’t think anyone is good enough to be with you. You have to admit that this situation was odd. He’s my top doctor, whom I banned from my hospital for punching a patient’s boyfriend, and then he shows up married to my only child. And you were pregnant. What would you have thought if you were me?”
“We really wanted that baby. Elias really wanted to be a father and—”
“I hurt you both deeply by diminishing your loss. But what I failed to make clear to you is that I have seen how deeply Elias loves you over the past few months. He worries about you. He takes care of you, and when you were in the hospital he was barking out orders like he was in charge of the world just to make sure you got what you needed. He’s a good man and a good husband. I’m glad you married him. You can get pregnant again—right away, if you would like—your father and I would be overjoyed to have a grandchild. But now you have this time to spend together. Take advantage of it. Learn how to be together. I had five years with your father before we had you, and I think that time was good for us. We knew who we were and what we wanted out of life individually before we brought you into this world.”
Her mother had just said something very deep to her. Cricket needed to know who she was and what she wanted from life, because she didn’t think she could ever truly be a good wife to Elias if she didn’t.
* * *
Elias had gotten out of bed very quietly that morning. He was off to the Midwest for another interview. This time it was a big one. A dream job at one of the best hospitals in the nation. For the past few weeks he had been traveling all over Florida, interviewing for jobs. He had been offered a few positions as head of a department at lower-ranking hospitals. They would keep him fairly close to his family, but he knew that with his long hours and being even farther away from Hideaway Island that he would rarely get to see them. He knew he wouldn’t be happy at those places. And if he was going to be away from his family, he might as well be at a place he could be proud to work for, so he was taking this chance.
He had to be on the first ferry out that morning, so he had said goodbye to Cricket last night. They had made love for hours. He hadn’t meant to. He had simply meant to kiss her, but that kiss had turned into more and he couldn’t stop himself. He couldn’t just take her once; he had to take her as many times as he could until they both passed out from exhaustion. He knew that he should have gone to sleep so he could be well rested for his journey, but he had needed her more than he needed the eight hours. The way she had clung to him afterward... It was as if she was telling him that she didn’t want him to leave her.
But not once had she asked him not to go. She had been nothing but supportive these past few weeks. She left good-luck messages on his phone. Tucked notes into his suit pockets, encouraged him the way any good wife would. But there was something she wasn’t telling him, something she was holding back. He had felt it ever since they got back from Costa Rica, but he couldn’t put his finger on exactly what it was.
He walked back into their bedroom, fully dressed and ready to go. He just needed to kiss her one last time before he left. Even though he’d said goodbye to her last night, he couldn’t leave without doing that. But instead of finding her curled up beneath the covers, he saw her sitting in her overstuffed armchair, looking out the window. She was wearing a simple sundress, her curls wild, her eyes still sleepy.
“What you are doing out of bed?”
“I thought you had gone alread
y. I was waiting for my lover to come in and ravage me.”
He grinned at her. “I still have time to murder a man before I leave.”
“I’m taking you all the way to the airport. I booked passage for the car on the ferry. I’m going to be with you until security separates us.”
“You don’t have to do that. It’s out of the way.”
“It isn’t. I’m planning to spend the day with my father. He’s going to make me French toast and then take me to the toy store.” She was quiet for a moment. “I need to take you to the airport, Elias. You’ll be gone longer than overnight. This will be the longest we’ve been apart since we got married.”
“It’s only a couple of days.”
“I’m going to have to get used to being alone once you go back to being a surgeon full-time.”
“That’s not true.”
“But it is. I grew up with a surgeon. Your patients will have to come first. I know that. I’m prepared for it.”
It would be just like before. Fifteen-hour surgeries. Exhaustion. Shifts that never seemed to end, but he had found huge satisfaction out of it. A huge sense of accomplishment. But now he had a wife whom he found more than satisfaction with, whom he found happiness with. Maybe going back and doing what he loved and being with the woman he loved at the same time would make him even happier, or maybe it would pull him in too many different directions. In order to give his all to what mattered the most, something else he loved was going to have to suffer.
“Do you want me to stay home? I won’t go to this interview. Just say the word and I’ll stay.”
“No. You’re going to go. You’re going to be offered this job.”
“You don’t know that.”
“I do. I know my mother put in a good word for you. She’s well respected across the country.”
“You didn’t ask her to do that, did you? I want to be hired on my own merits.”
“I didn’t have to ask her, and you should know my mother well enough by now to know that she won’t do anything she doesn’t believe is right. She has worked with you. She knows how good a surgeon you are. You deserve this job.”
“I wish you would stop being the supportive wife and tell me what you want.”
“That’s easy. I want you to be happy. That’s all I’ve ever wanted.”
“Kiss me.” He took a step toward her, and she put up her hand to stop him.
“I’ll only kiss you when we are saying goodbye at the airport. You know what happens when we start kissing. I end up pregnant. You end up out of a job. You won’t be blaming me for this one.”
“Kissing you is what led me to marrying you.”
“I know.”
“I wouldn’t take back that kiss, even if my life depended on it.”
She looked at him for a long moment with so much emotion in her eyes, it nearly took his breath away. “I’m getting my keys and leaving this bedroom right now. Neither one of us will be safe if I don’t.”
She was right to go, because if he was with her any longer, he would miss his flight.
* * *
Cricket’s father kissed her forehead the next morning. She had just planned to spend the day in Miami before she headed back to the island, but she couldn’t force herself to leave the warmth of her parents’ home. Her house would feel too empty without Elias. The sheets would smell of his skin. There would be little signs of him all over the place. She didn’t want to face it. Having him and not being able to be with him was far worse than never having had him at all.
“Good morning, princess.”
“Good morning, Daddy. How did you sleep last night?”
“Okay. I heard you wandering around last night.”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you.”
“I wasn’t awake because I heard you. I was awake because I was concerned about you.”
“Why?” She looked up at her father, who clearly was worried. “I’m fine.”
“Bug, I know you better than you know yourself.”
“I got an email last night from a colleague I used to work with in Boston. He offered me a job. They are starting a new medical anthropology department at the university he heads. He wants me to run it. But the job is in London. I would head up a department in one of the most prestigious universities in the world.”
“Tell me what you want to hear from me, and I’ll say it.”
She frowned in confusion. “Tell me what you think about it. I want you to be truthful.”
“If you think I want my only child living on a different continent, you’re insane. But I also recognize how big of an opportunity this is for you, and I will be excited for you. Still, this brings up a hundred more questions.”
“Like how I can entertain a job offer when my husband is interviewing for his dream job in Wisconsin?”
“Yes, and more importantly, is this job in London that you weren’t looking for one that you want to take?”
It was a good question, one that made her pause and think. “I don’t want to be just the wife of a surgeon. I want to do more with my career. I want to leave a mark on this world, and for a moment that job offer seemed like an amazing thing, but then I got a text from Elias’s sister. She was just checking in on me. She said she would come over if I wanted, because she knows I have a hard time going to sleep without him.”
“She sounds like a wonderful person.”
“His entire family is wonderful. I don’t know how I would have gotten through these past few months without them, and it’s made me realize that I don’t want to leave Hideaway Island. I want to be close to my parents. I want to be surrounded by family. All the time.”
“That’s a beautiful thing, Cricket. You need to tell your husband that.”
“I will. As soon as he calls me tonight.”
Chapter 16
Instead of calling Cricket, like he usually did when he was away on these trips, Elias pulled out his laptop and opened his video-chat app. He had never been this far away from her since they had gotten married. He had never gone so long without seeing her face, and while he had been busy, meeting with the heads of the hospital and touring the massive groundbreaking facility, he missed Cricket. He missed having dinner with her every night. He missed sharing coffee with her in the morning. And he was very aware that all that would change the moment he accepted a position as a surgeon again.
Cricket accepted the call, and seeing her pretty face put him at ease. She was in a pink nightie, her thin cotton bathrobe hanging loosely around her shoulders, and he could see just a hint of her skin, which was sweet and arousing at the same time.
“Hello, my husband.”
“Hello, my wife. How are you today?”
“I’m okay. I stayed at my parents’ house last night. When I came home, I had a long lunch with Virginia and Ava. We went shopping and then came back to the house and made cupcakes.”
“You made cupcakes?” He grinned. Cricket had never baked. She had just started to cook a couple of months ago, out of necessity. She’d said that she needed to learn how to feed their child, but baking was something entirely different.
“Virginia said it was what girls do when they get together sometimes.”
“Did you like it?”
“I loved it. I wish she had never shown me how to do it. I’m afraid I’ll now have to eat cupcakes at least twice a week.”
“I’ll help you eat them.”
“So tell me how everything went. I’ve been nervous for you.”
“Everything went incredibly well. I thought Miami Mercy had state-of-the-art equipment, but you should see this place. They are on the cutting edge of medicine. The work they do here will change millions of lives. I was honored to even be considered and was blown away that they offered me a spot o
n their cardiothoracic team.”
“You got the job! I knew you would get it.” She smiled at him. “Are you okay with giving up trauma? I don’t think you’ll see much of it there.”
“I wanted trauma for the excitement, but here I’ll get to perform experimental procedures, try new techniques. I’ll be learning from the best. That is, if you think I should take it.”
“Of course I think you should take it! We’ve been through this before. This is an opportunity that you can’t pass up. Take the job. I know you’ll love it. When do you start?”
“That’s the thing—they want me to start immediately. The surgeon I would be replacing is retiring, and he wants me to shadow him and get the lay of the land before he goes. They want me there tomorrow. They will pay for temporary housing and all our moving expenses. I just need you to overnight me some stuff. I was thinking that you could join me early next week.”
The happy mask Cricket had been wearing slipped from her face, and the sadness that she had been hiding for the past few weeks was now evident. He had been waiting for it to appear. He knew in his gut that she hadn’t been okay with any of this.
“I won’t be joining you next week, Elias.”
“Then when? The week after?”
“I don’t know how long it will take. I’ve decided I don’t want to leave Hideaway Island. I need to be near family. Yours and my own, and in Wisconsin, I know I won’t be able to be happy.”
“But you just told me to take the job. Do you want me to reject the offer?”
“No, I want you to take it. You have to take it. You’ll live there, and I’ll stay here. This job will be a huge part of your life, and I don’t want you worrying about me or my happiness. I want you to stay there and do what you are meant to do. Do what you would be doing if we had never met and I had never gotten pregnant.”
“What about us?”
“Maybe we need to be apart for a while. You need to adjust to your job, and I need to figure out what I’m going to do about my own. I’ve still got research that I want to conduct overseas. There are still things I want to accomplish, and this might be the perfect time.”