by Glenyse Ward
I was to put all the groceries away and take her personal shopping and put that on her bed, then I was to go out and collect the eggs as it was getting late. After that I was to set the table for two. She told me not to worry about getting anything to eat for her and her husband. They would have a light meal of salad and cold meat which she was going to prepare herself. I could have a poached egg - and not to worry about anything else as her sons were dining out.
While I was eating my poached egg, she came out of the dining room to pick some mail up from the cupboard next to me. Before she went back, she told me that she was going back into town the next day and would I bake a couple of legs of lamb because the last one seemed to have gone down rather quick, which was unusual. Her sons must be eating very well.
I nearly choked on my last bite of bread. I picked up my tin mug and gulped down some tea, hoping I did not show any signs of being the culprit.
FIRST PAY
As time went by I was getting used to the place and its surroundings. Mrs Bigelow went into town quite a lot, which I didn’t mind as I felt quite at ease doing things at my own pace. Strangely enough I was getting used to her and her ways too. I could control my emotions, and not tie myself up with remorseful feelings.
I think her being away all day helped a lot, as I didn’t feel so uptight. I used to get very lonely, but I could put up with the loneliness rather than have her around, treating me like a robot.
Whenever she said anything to me it was like water off a duck’s back. I thought the only way to beat her was to give her back some of her own medicine.
One certain day Mrs Bigelow came to me while I was out in the laundry washing and scrubbing away on the old scrubbing board. She stated that I had been with her over three months, and this day was Friday, which meant she would take me into town that afternoon, as she was going to pay me for my work. I got very excited, thanked her and told her that it was nice of her.
When she disappeared back into the house, I lost all interest in the washing, just got it out of the sink and hung it up quickly on the line. I went back into the laundry, then looked back and saw all the soap running from the clothes. The lawn looked like it was snowing.
So I got the water hose which was nearby, and hosed the clothes and lawn till all the evidence of soap was gone, then I was off to my room to get ready.
I grabbed my toiletries and had a wash, soaked my head with water, had a quick wipe over with my towel, then went to get dressed. I put on my Sunday best clothes that I used to wear in the mission. Sunday, the nuns considered this day a holy day, a special day, something important to do with their Catholic religion. All usual activities used to cease and we had to dress up in our Good Clothes.
So on this occasion I put on my green pleated skirt, which came down to the ankles, my white blouse with green embroidery around the collar, that matched up with my skirt, got the comb and ran it through my hair. I put on a pair of pale yellow shoes which looked as if they had seen better days, then ran out to where she was waiting in the car.
I opened the front door, apologized for keeping her waiting, then sat down beside her in the front seat. She look at me in a most disdainful way. Her hands went out towards me in a striking manner, shooing me out of the car. I got the fright of my life, my nerves being in a dreadful state. I thought a spider or lizard was on the seat with us, as she was acting like she was shooing a chook out of her car.
I jumped out of the car, tripped over and landed in her garden in the most embarrassing state. My skirt was up near my head. I got up quickly and pulled it down, very ashamed that she had seen my bloomers.
I didn’t know what to do, I just stood there motionless while she was wiping down the front seat of the car where I had been sitting. When she finished she told me to go and dry my hair properly as it was still dripping, then to come back and sit in the back seat of the car - as she never allowed her slaves to sit with her in the front. I went back to my room. I didn’t feel like going to town after that episode.
In town, I felt strange as I’d never seen so many people pushing here and there. She told me she was going to the bank, and I was to wait for her in the car till she came back with the money.
I felt nervous sitting there in the car, with people going up and down. It all seemed so frightening. So I got out of the car and ran behind Mrs Bigelow. When she got to the front door of the bank I was right beside her, smiling.
She was just about to scold me, when her angry face turned into smiles. One of her friends came up and said, “Hello” to her. I stood there feeling good, as she couldn’t speak to me but had to continue her conversation with her friend. Then she excused herself and explained she was taking me, her dark helper, into the bank and she would catch up with her later on.
So we went into the bank. I was really terrified as I went up to the counter with her. There were faces, faces everywhere staring!
The man came to the counter and said, “May I help you, Mrs Bigelow?” She explained to him that she would like to draw some money out and also that she would like me to open a bank account, so when I came into town next time I could come and get my own money out. She asked the man to fix my business up first. While he went away to get my book and attend to the details, she gave me a fortnight’s wages, four pounds.
With trembling hands I folded it up real small and put it in my bra. She told me I wasn’t being lady-like and to get myself a purse. 1 was wishing that the man would hurry up as I wanted to get out of the place.
At last the man came back. He asked Mrs Bigelow for all the information. She told him she owed me two month’s wages, which was sixteen pounds. She handed him the money to put in the book - then all of a sudden he asked me what my name was?
I put my hands over my face, and with my head down I started to dig up the carpet with my right foot. I was too ashamed to talk to him, as I could hear people walking all around me.
Mrs Bigelow just got my papers and filled them in, told the man that everything would be alright and marched me out of the bank. She told me she was disgusted with me, and said to meet her back at the car in half an hour. I was glad I was out of that bank.
So with my four pounds, I walked off down the street to see what I could buy. I wasn’t going to let her dampen my feelings. It was my first pay day and I was excited that I could buy what I wanted, even though I felt insecure walking around in that strange town.
People walked past and said, “Hello”. I turned my head the other way, too bashful to answer back.
I went in search for a shop which sold lollies and chocolates and found one on the comer. There I stood at the door and knocked on it. No one came out so I knocked on it again. Then, all of a sudden, two high school kids just about knocked me over as they pushed past to open the door and enter. They turned to me and said, ‘You don’t knock on the door Dumb Grannie, you go in and the door bell rings”.
The door slammed in my face. I opened it up and went inside. I stepped over to the counter and looked at the lollies, thinking, “Dumb’s not the word!”
I was startled out of my thoughts when a lady asked me in a very gentle voice, if there was something I wanted? I went all shy again, put my head down and started rubbing the floor again with my foot.
What made it worse, I heard those same boys giggling. Then the woman told them not to be so rude, and ordered them to leave. They went out the door saying, “See you dumbo” - still laughing.
She told me not to worry about those boys, and asked me where I came from? She told me to come over and sit at the table with her, which I did. I was starting to feel at ease. I felt I wanted to cry, I picked up the hem of my skirt and started rolling it up all the time she spoke.
I told her that I came from a mission and was working for Mrs Bigelow. She told me not to take any notice of her attitude and just do my work, as a lot of girls had worked for Mrs Bigelow and they had all felt the same way as I did. She told me that she wasn’t too keen on her ladyship either: she’d had a
couple of run-ins with my employer’s husband, as he was the Lord Mayor and disagreed with her on matters concerning the shop. Then she told me if I ever needed a friend, I could come to her anytime and sit down and have a talk.
I thanked her. Then she asked me if I wanted to buy something? I told her I would like to buy a chocolate and a bag of mixed lollies, a pack of biscuits and a bottle of cool drink.
While she wrapped them up I got up and took my money from my bra and gave it to her. She gave me all my stuff and two pounds change back and told me, “Don’t worry about nothing” - she’d see me next time I came into town.
I went out of her shop feeling much better, glad at the thought that I had found a friend in whom I could confide. I made my way back up the street to where Mrs Bigelow had her car parked.
When I reached her car, she wasn’t there so I sat down on a bench under a tree, and thought I’d have myself a piece of chocolate while I was waiting. It tasted lovely - this was the first time that I had ever tasted chocolate in my life. Then I saw her coming, so I put everything back into the bag, and got up and stood at the back door of the car.
When she reached it, she told me to grab her shopping and put it in the boot of the car. I took the key off her to open the boot, then handed it back straight away. She opened the doors up, and by that time I’d finished packing all her goods away. I made sure the lid of the boot was down secure, then I climbed in the back seat of the car.
She didn’t say much to me. I was getting quite used to her attitude. I was thinking I couldn’t wait for next time to come into town as I had found a friend, and she was nothing like Mrs Bigelow!
WASH THE CAR SEAT
As we sped back home, I sat back and viewed the scenery, which was very pretty. The big hills and the winding road, the erectness of the gum trees - a perfect picture of nature.
All too soon we were in front of the gate leading up to her farm. I got out to open it as she drove through. She told me to get back into the car and leave the gate open. We drove up to the house and she said she would leave the car in the driveway as she wanted me to wash the seat I had been sitting on with Pine-o-cleen before she parked it in the garage. After that I was to take her shopping into her room, then get on with my other jobs.
So I went to my room, put my small bag on my bed, got changed out of my good clothes and put my working clothes on. Then I set about finding the Pine-o-cleen to give the car a thorough wash.
I just emptied the bottle all over the car’s front and back seats. The smell was very strong and sickening, so I stood back from the car a bit to breathe in some fresh air. Then I took a rag and the running hose into the car and sloshed it out. When that was finished I went over to check her shopping to see if anything had gotten wet, because the car was right next to the verandah and there was water everywhere.
While I was checking, I thought I might as well take her shopping to her room. Fortunately it was dry. Just as I was bending down to pick it up, she stepped out onto the verandah, grabbed her bags out of my hands and asked me why all this water was running everywhere?
I told her I was only doing what she wanted me to do, and that was wash her car. She walked over to the car and took a look inside. She nearly had a fit when she saw how soaked and wet everything was. She looked at me in a furious state and called me, “A very stupid girl!” and if I damaged any upholstery in her car she was taking it out of my wages. I was to hurry up and get this mess all cleaned up. She told me she had asked me to wipe over my seat with a cloth, not drench the car.
After it was dried out, she parked the car in the garage and I finished watering her lawn and gardens, then went inside to set her table and get the meal ready for her. She was there in the lounge chair sitting and reading the paper. She told me she had a casserole in the fridge. I was to put that in the oven to warm it up, then when it was ready I was to let her know, as by that time Mr Bigelow should be back from town, and I could take their tea in to them and serve it up. She said I could have bread and butter and open up a tin of spaghetti for my tea.
While I was waiting for the casserole to heat up, I pottered around getting my tea ready. I was in the kitchen when Mr Bigelow drove up, so I went to check the casserole - it was piping hot. I turned the oven off and made sure everything was ready. Then I heard her call out to bring the tea in and serve it up. So I laid the trolley up and went into the lounge to serve them.
While I was there, she told me tomorrow being Saturday her and Mr Bigelow would be out all day, and her boys would be gone for the weekend too, so I was to make sure all their shoes were clean and spotless. I was to make sure to round up all the turkeys and lock them in their yard, as the foxes were starting to get at them again. I was also to collect the eggs and stack them away in a container. “Next time I go to town I will take them with me as a friend of mine is asking for some. Then you know the old shed at the end of the garden? I want you to give it a good clean out.”
The list went on. “Also you will find some boxes under a ledge. In those boxes you’ll find some preserving jars. Get all the jars - there are about five dozen - I want you to give them a thorough washing and cleaning, because next week I shall be preserving some more fruit. The pears are beginning to ripen and we are quite short of them. When you have completed those jobs, you can go down to the orchard and pick some pears for the table - fill the fruit bowl up!”
“Then you can cook Mr Bigelow and myself some tea: We will have chops and vegies.” She asked if I understood everything - then added that instead of sweeping the driveway first thing in the morning, I was to go down and pick her oranges. She would like her juice at seven o’clock as she was going out at eight.
I left the room, and went to have my tea, which I was thankful for as I was feeling rather washed out with all those orders and jobs, though in another sense of my thinking, I was glad that they were all going out - I was looking forward to a very peaceful day!
So after I had my tea and Mr and Mrs Bigelow retired to the lounge, I got stuck into the cleaning up. When all my duties were done, I went to bed feeling quite knocked out.
SHADOWS ON THE WALL
In the morning I woke up still feeling quite drained out. I dressed rather wearily as the way I was feeling I could have slept for a week. “Maybe after a good wash. I’ll feel better,” I thought.
So I got the old burner down, lit it up and armed with my towel and soap I set off to the old wash tub. I had myself a good wash and felt much better. When I went out to get the straw broom, I noticed it was still quite dark. Suddenly I remembered she wanted me to go down to the paddock where the orange tree was and pick two oranges for her. I didn’t feel like going as I was a bit scared.
When I was a little girl growing up in the mission, I had this great fear of the dark, as the big girls used to tell us little girls ghostie yarns and how the devil was out to get us. Also the nuns would lock us in dark rooms at night, which terrified me.
I remember how at the mission, when the lights used to go out at nine o’clock in the dormitory, the nuns used to leave an old lantern burning in the fire place. If anyone wanted to go to the toilet at night she had to walk towards that lantern, up the long passage.
The closer she came, the bigger the shadow on the wall grew. And when she leaned over to pick it up, her shadow bent down too. We got the feeling that our days were up; we just about wet ourselves on the spot.
Also I remember telling the girls a joke after lights out in the dormitory, one I heard that day in school. I did not know it was dirty because we were never taught about the birds and the bees. My sister and I used to fight like cats and dogs, and she dobbed me in.
If you were caught talking after lights out, you had to take the consequences, so rather than be locked up in the dark, I told this nun the joke. She dropped her bundle of keys in shock and told me they never heard these jokes in Germany! So I took my hiding rather than be locked up. To this day I am still very frightened of the dark.
This parti
cular morning, I thought I’d be brave and not think about anything. I’d just go straight down and back. Nothing to it! I got the lantern, set my fears aside and off I went. The wind was blowing the leaves in all directions. It was stronger as I got further down the track. A couple of times the flame nearly went out. I was starting to get shivers down my back but I kept on walking till I reached the big fence. I put the lantern in a position where the light shone faintly on the orange tree.
Now I was over the fence, making my way there, when I heard this movement like something scratching the ground. I looked up and right in front of me, under the orange tree, I saw this big woolly ram ready to charge. I let out one big scream, and I was back over that fence in no time.
The lantern went out, I didn’t wait to pick it up, I left it there next to the fence. Like a hunted doe with her heart full of fear, I bounded back to the house and never once looked back.
I went into the garage, turned on the big lights and sat there till I caught my breath.
Now that I had got my breath back, and I was my normal self again, I wondered what to do about her orange juice? No way was I going back down there again. So what I thought I’d do was go into the kitchen, get two oranges and squeeze the juice out of them.
So I went quietly into the kitchen. Nobody was up yet. Quickly, I rushed around and got her orange juice ready. I went into the lounge, got her glass out, poured the juice in, put a clean doyley over it, cleaned my mess up, then went outside. I felt good now as it was beginning to get light. Before I started sweeping I thought I’d better go and get the lantern, as I did not want to explain anything to her. So I ran down to get it.
That horrible old ram was still there. Before I knew what I was doing I picked up a rock and threw it to get even with him. I collected the lantern and went back to sweep her driveway.