He stroked Brooke’s arms, concerned by how cool her skin felt to the touch. “Do you feel like you’re going to be sick again?”
She shook her head. “No. I don’t think so.”
“Can you walk if I keep my arm around you? I can’t have you fainting on me.”
“I won’t faint.”
“All we have to do is make it out to my truck. We can we leave your paints here, can’t we?”
“I suppose.”
He stood and pulled her with him, waiting to see if she really was steady. Brushing her hair back from her face, he bent to look into her eyes. “One step at a time, honey. Look at me and tell me you’re okay.”
Brooke sniffed. “I’m swell,” she muttered. “But don’t be nice to me or I’m going to cry all over your beautiful blue shirt.”
“Duly noted.”
“Get me out of here. Please.” Her skin was translucent. Her bottom lip trembled ever so slightly.
Austin wrapped an arm around her waist and said a quick prayer that no one would stop them. He sensed that Brooke was close to the breaking point.
Fortunately, the clock was on their side. They were too early to run into the dinner crowd, and most of the daytime regulars were gone already. Austin whisked his companion inside, down the hall and into the reception area. Other than a few quick greetings and a wave, no one stopped them.
In moments, they were outside on the street. Austin steered her toward his vehicle. When she didn’t balk, his anxiety grew. “I think we need some expert advice, Brooke. Do you have a doctor here in Royal?”
Her eyes rounded. “Are you kidding me? I can’t walk into some clinic and tell them I might be pregnant. My parents would know before I got back home.”
“You’re not a child. And besides, there are privacy laws.”
“That’s cute. Clearly you don’t know my mother.”
“Then I have a suggestion to make.”
Brooke climbed into the passenger seat and covered her face with her hands. “Oh...” The strangled moan made him wince.
“What if we drive over to Joplin? My sister is a nurse. We can talk this over with her.”
Brooke wiped her face with the back of her hand, her big-eyed gaze chagrined. “What’s to talk about? Either I am, or I’m not.”
He kept his voice gentle. “You can’t even say the P word out loud. Do you want me asking the questions, or would you feel more comfortable with another woman?”
“You think I’m an idiot, don’t you?”
“No,” he said carefully. “But from what you’ve told me, you haven’t been sexually active recently, and I think this thing took you by surprise. I know the condom broke, but you told me you were on birth control.”
Her face turned red. “The morning I left the hotel I was so flustered I forgot to take my pill. I didn’t realize it until a few days later when I got to the end of the pack and had one left over.”
He frowned. “And your period?”
“It started eventually... Well, there was...” She bowed her head. “This is so embarrassing.”
“You’re saying you had some bleeding.”
She nodded, her expression mortified. “Yes.”
He drummed his fingers on the steering wheel. “Stay here for a minute. Try to relax. Let me call my sister. I won’t mention your name, but I’ll ask a few questions.”
Without waiting for Brooke to answer, he hopped out of the truck and dialed Audra’s number. The conversation that followed was not one a man liked having with his sister, but it was necessary. The longer Audra talked, the more his stomach sank. At last, he got back in the truck.
Brooke was curled in a ball, her head resting on her knees.
He touched her shoulder. “Look at me, honey.”
She sat up, her expression wary, and exhaled. “Well, what did she say?”
He shrugged. “According to Audra, you can get pregnant on any day of the month, even if you only miss one pill. It’s far less likely, of course, but it happens.”
“And the bleeding?”
“It could be spotting from hormonal fluctuations during implantation and not a real period. The only way to know for sure is to take a test.”
A single tear rolled down her cheek.
Austin felt helplessness and anger engulf him in equal measures. This was exactly why he didn’t let himself get involved with sweet young things who didn’t know the score. Brooke was vulnerable. She’d been under her parents’ intimidating influence for far too long.
To her credit, she’d been doing everything she could to strike out on her own. But the gap between her and Austin was still too great. He was worlds ahead of her in life experience. He knew what it was like to love and to suffer and to lose everything. He wouldn’t allow that to happen to him again. Ever.
No matter how much Brooke tugged at his heartstrings, he had no place for her in his life. In his bed, maybe. But only for a season.
So what now?
“I’m sorry,” she said, the words dull. “I take full responsibility. This has nothing to do with you.”
“Don’t be stupid.” His temper flared out of nowhere. “Of course it does. I could have said no at the bar. I should have. But I wanted you.” He touched her cheek, stroking it lightly. His heart turned over in his chest when she tilted her head and nuzzled her face in his palm like a kitten seeking warmth. He pulled her across the bench seat and into his arms. “Don’t be scared, Brooke. We’ll figure this out.” He paused, afraid to ask the next question but knowing he wouldn’t be able to move forward without the answer. “Did you propose to me because you thought you might be pregnant?”
She stiffened in his embrace and jerked backward. Her indignation was too genuine to be feigned. “Of course not. I need my inheritance. That’s all.”
“Okay. Don’t get your feathers ruffled.”
She bit her lip. “Oh, hell, Austin. I don’t know. Maybe I did. I’ve been feeling weird for the past week. But I’ve ignored all the signs. It seemed too impossible to be true. I didn’t want it to be true.”
They sat there in silence for what seemed like forever. Outside, the sky turned gold then navy then completely dark. Brooke’s stomach rumbled audibly.
“Here’s what we’re going to do,” Austin said, trying to sound more confident than he felt. “There’s a truck stop halfway between Royal and Joplin. We can get a meal there. It will be reasonably private, and if we’re lucky, the convenience mart will have a pregnancy test. How does that sound?”
“Like a bad after-school movie.”
He chuckled. The fact that she could find a snippet of humor in their situation gave him hope. “That’s my girl. Where’s your purse?”
“In my car. One street over and around the corner.”
Once they had retrieved what she needed, they set out. Austin tuned the radio to an easy listening station, pulled onto the highway and drove just over the speed limit. His stomach was jittery with nerves.
Brooke was quiet—too quiet. Guilt swamped him, though he had done nothing wrong, not really. Other than not resisting temptation, perhaps.
The truck stop was hopping on this particular night. That was a good thing. Brooke and Austin were able to blend into the crowd. The hostess seated them at a booth with faux leather seats and handed them plastic-coated menus that were only slightly sticky.
Brooke studied hers dubiously.
He cocked his head. “What’s wrong?”
“I’m starving, but I’m afraid to eat.”
“Start with a few small bites. We’ve got all night. Or will your parents be expecting you home?”
“No. I told them I was spending the evening with a friend. They don’t really care what I do on a small scale. It’s the big picture they want to control.”
After the waitress took their order
, Austin reached across the table and gripped Brooke’s hand. “I won’t leave you to face this alone,” he said carefully. “I need you to know that.”
Her eyes shone with tears again. “Thank you.”
“Do you want me to go buy the test now and get it over with, or would you rather wait until after dinner?”
She seemed stricken by his question. “Let’s eat first. Then maybe we could book a room? Even if we only use it for a couple of hours?” She winced. “OMG. That sounds sleazy, doesn’t it?”
The look on her face made him laugh. “I think it’s a fine idea. In the meantime, let’s talk about your inheritance and what you hope to do with it. I really want to know.”
Brooke sat up straighter, and some of the strain left her face. “Well, I told you about starting the art school.”
He nodded. “Yes. Do you have a business plan?”
“Actually, I do,” she said proudly. “I even have my eye on a small piece of property near the center of town. It’s zoned for commercial and residential both, but the woman who owns the land is partial to small-business owners. She and I have talked in confidence, and she really wants me to have it. The only missing piece is capital.”
“Which marrying me will provide.”
“Exactly.”
“Even without a possible pregnancy, I’m surprised you’re not more worried about your parents’ reactions to me being your fiancé,” he said quietly. “I’m not exactly upper-crust. Audra and I have done well for ourselves, but our mom cleaned houses for a living, and our dad was a plumber.”
“They’re both gone? But you’re so young.”
“Mom and Dad were never able to have kids. They adopted Audra and me when they were forty-nine. We lost them both within six months of each other last year. Pneumonia.”
“I’m so sorry.” Her empathy was almost palpable. “That must have been devastating, especially for you. Did it bring back bad memories of losing your wife?”
Nine
As soon as the words left her mouth, Brooke wanted to snatch them back. The flash of bleak remembrance she saw in Austin’s eyes crushed her. It was as if the grief was fresh and new. Did he carry it always like a millstone around his neck, or did it come and go only when insensitive friends, like her, for instance, brought it up out of the blue?
Fortunately, the waitress arrived with their meals, and the moment passed.
Brooke, though she was leery of getting sick again, couldn’t resist the sight and smell of the comfort food. She was starving and, thankfully, was able to eat without consequences. Austin cleared his plate as well.
The truck stop was as close to a good ole Texas honky-tonk as a place could get. The atmosphere was rowdy and warm and filled with laughter and the scents of cold beer and warm sweat.
It was not the kind of spot Brooke frequented, but tonight, it was perfect. As long as she didn’t move from this booth, she was insulated from the consequences of her actions.
Unfortunately, though, the clock continued to move. The check was paid. The evening waned. Though Austin had said little during the meal, his gaze had stayed on her constantly. In his eyes she saw concern and more. Certainly a flash of sexual awareness. They were both thinking about the escapade that had brought them to this moment.
She bit her lip. “Have you heard of Schrödinger’s cat?”
Austin sighed. “Here we go.”
“What?” she said, indignant.
“Everyone who’s ever watched a certain TV sitcom has heard of Schrödinger’s cat. You’re saying that as long as we sit in this booth and never leave, you’re both pregnant and not pregnant. Have I got that?”
“Works for me,” she said, stirring the melting ice in her Coke moodily.
“You’re not a coward, Brooke Goodman. Knowledge is power. One step at a time. I can quote you clichés till the cows come home. Let’s go buy that test and see what we’re facing.”
“It might be negative,” she said, desperately clinging to one last shred of hope.
“It might be...”
His impassive expression told her nothing.
The minimart, unlike the truck stop, was not crowded. Brooke, her face hot with embarrassment, snatched two boxes—different brands—off the shelf, plunked down her credit card and hastily signed the receipt. Fortunately for her, the employee manning the counter was more interested in his video game than he was in her purchases.
Soon after, Austin secured two keys to room twenty-four, the last unit on the far right end. They parked in front of their home away from home. He unlocked the door and waited for Brooke to enter.
Could have been better. Could have been worse.
The decor was late ’80s, but everything appeared to be clean.
She stood, irresolute, in the middle of the floor.
Austin locked the door, took her in his arms and kissed her forehead. “Get it over with. I’ll be right here.”
The list of humiliating things she had experienced today was growing. Now she had to add peeing on a stick with a tall, handsome cowboy just on the other side of the door. Fortunately, directions for pregnancy tests were straightforward. She read them, did what had to be done and waited.
After the first result, she ripped open the second box. Pee and repeat.
There was no mistaking the perfect match.
She didn’t feel like throwing up. She didn’t feel anything at all.
Austin knocked on the door. “You okay in there, honey?”
“Yes,” she croaked. “Give me just a minute.” She dried them, hoping to erase the evidence. Still the same. Taking a deep breath, she opened the bathroom door and leaned against the frame, feeling breathless and dizzy and incredulous. “Well,” she said, “I’m pregnant.”
Austin went white under his tan. Which was really pretty funny, because it wasn’t exactly a huge surprise. Apparently, like her, he had been hoping against hope that her barfing had been a fluke.
He swallowed visibly. “I see.”
“Say something,” she begged. Why couldn’t this be like the commercials where the woman showed the man the stick and they both danced around the room?
“What do you want me to say?” His gaze was stoic, his stance guarded.
“I keep feeling the need to apologize,” she whispered. The tears started then in earnest. They rolled down her cheeks and onto her shirt. Austin didn’t want a wife, not even a temporary one. And he surely didn’t want a child. This man had been badly hurt. All he wanted was his freedom.
Though she didn’t make a sound, her distress galvanized him. He closed the space between them and scooped her up in his arms, carrying her to the bed. He sat down and held her on his lap. “Things happen, Brooke. This situation isn’t your fault. It isn’t mine.”
Time passed. Maybe five minutes, maybe an entire day. So many thoughts and feelings rushed through her body. Having Austin hold her like this was both comforting and at the same time wildly arousing. Her body tensed in heated reaction. In his arms, she felt as if she could handle any obstacle in her path. But at the same time, he made her want things that were dangerous to her peace of mind.
Beneath her, his sex hardened. The fact that Austin Bradshaw was now unmistakably excited made her want to strip him and take him without a single thought for the future.
Instead, she scooted off his lap and stood, scrubbing her face with her hands, trying not to compound her mistakes. One thing she knew for sure. “I know I have...options, but I want this baby. Maybe want is the wrong word. I’m responsible for this baby. I’m the one who walked into a bar to do something foolish. Now I’m pregnant. So I’ll deal with the consequences.”
“A baby will change everything about your life,” Austin said. His dark gaze was watchful. “It will be a hell of a long time before you can take that months-long trip to Europe to visit art galleries
and study the grand masters.”
The enormity of the truth in his words squeezed her stomach. “Yes. But that was a selfish bucket list item and one that can wait indefinitely.”
“I’ll provide for the child financially. You don’t have to worry about money.”
She winced. “I appreciate the sentiment, but with my inheritance, that won’t be necessary. I’m assuming this pregnancy will tip the balance in my favor. My parents are not fond of babies. They won’t want me in the house, so I think they’ll have no choice but to turn over what is legally mine.”
“Having met your mother, I think you’re being naive. If I had to guess, I’d say they’ll use your child as a bargaining chip to control you. Your situation hasn’t gotten better, Brooke. It’s gotten worse.”
She gaped at him, studying the grim certainty on his face and processing the truth of his words. “I hadn’t thought of it that way.”
He stood as well, jamming his hands in his pockets and pacing. “We’ll get through this...”
“We?” she asked faintly, feeling as if she were an actor in a very bad play.
He shot her a hard glance, his face carved in planes and angles that suggested strong emotion tightly under wraps. “We.” His forceful tone brooked no argument. “We’re a family now, Brooke...whether we want to be or not. Our only choice is how to handle the way forward. You asked me to marry you. Now I’m saying yes.”
“This isn’t your problem,” she insisted. “It’s my baby.”
He stopped in front of her, their breath mingling, he was so close. At last, the rigid posture of his big frame relaxed, and a small smile tilted those masculine lips that knew how to turn a woman inside out. “Sorry, honey. It doesn’t work that way. There were two of us in that bed.”
“But you don’t want to be here,” she cried. “You’re only planning to stay in Royal for a couple of months at the most.”
He slid his hands into her hair and cupped her neck, tilting her head, finding her lips with his. “So I’ll change my plans,” he said, kissing her lazily. “Some women sail through pregnancy. But a lot of them don’t. You need someone to care for you and support you. Right now, that someone is going to be me.”
Million Dollar Baby Page 8