“Joseph, you came up here on your own. You didn’t bring along a poor animal or join a stampede of madness. You have someone back home you love and you want to give her the best. You took the risk for yourself. Make it worth all of this. We’ll get out and you’ll go home and marry Yvonne. This will all be behind you. You can go home.”
“And what about you?” He turned to face her. “You haven’t any place to call home. Where will you go, alone?”
“Well,” she said. She certainly couldn’t go home with him. She had tried not to think of it that way. She didn’t want to ponder that she really had no home and that he was the only person she had in her life. She had tried hard to make other plans, plans for a new life, her own life.
“I’ll start over,” she said. “Maybe open that shop I thought about. I’m beholden to no one. I’ll be my own person with a fresh start.”
He watched her, listening to her talk. She smiled and tried to add a light tone to what she said, but her face had a lonely look. He was certain she didn’t believe her own words and that they were only said for his benefit. He considered apologizing again. Telling her he was sorry that it wasn’t her he loved. That they would emerge from their ordeal and they’d enjoy the remainder of their lives. But, he thought, it was pointless to say it again.
“Goodnight,” he said and rolled away from her.
“I’ll be fine,” she said. “You have given me so much, Joseph. You owe me nothing except to get yourself home and married to that woman. Find yourself happiness with the gold and find peace. That’s what I really want for you. No more, no less.”
Find peace, Joseph thought. He wondered if he ever could.
Chapter Thirty-Three
Joseph walked beside her as they passed through the tide of travelers that flowed along the path which was enclosed now by tall pines and white birch on either side. In some places they passed the crowds easily. In some they had to step into the trees. In others they simply had to wait or press their way through.
Alice looked at the crowds as they passed. These people were only at the beginning of a journey that she was now struggling to finish. Some of them were enthusiastic, ready to become rich. Others seemed impatient, sometimes to the point of being combative. No one was organized and none of them could know the horrors that waited ahead on the trail. Occasionally someone would spring into action, beating a horse or picking a fight with another person close to them. When they fought, their attack was brutal. The crowds would rise and a brief disturbance would ensue. Then, just as suddenly, they would turn their attention back to the journey and resume their climb.
Joseph took a deep breath and squared his shoulders.
“It won’t be too much longer. We’re nearly there,” he said.
Alice could see that he had spent every ounce of his determination to get them this far but now it seemed he struggled to keep his focus. He had risen in the morning in a daze and it took him longer than usual to get moving along the trail. In town they could eat and rest and on the ship they could regain their strength and clear their minds. Alice hoped that would be enough.
“Then let’s get going,” she said and smiled in encouragement, touching his arm.
Part Three
June 22, 1897
Mooresville, Alaska
Chapter Thirty-Four
Alice Ellis looked down the slope past the migration of people ascending the mountain and saw the town. She saw the ships in the water. She saw the end of their journey.
Turning to her partner, Alice looked up and could see the glimmer of hope in his eyes. “Joseph, look. We’re out! We’ve done it!”
He looked down at her and a smile slowly spread over his face.
“We’re out! We did it! Look!” Alice could barely contain her excitement.
He chuckled low and ran his hand over his beard. Then he stood up straighter and stared hard at the town in the distance.
“We did it!” Alice smiled to him.
“We certainly did,” Joseph said.
Alice could see his exhaustion as he stepped ahead of her on the trail. He stopped and looked down the mountainside, then turned to her and shook his head slowly. He walked back, took her hand and they walked down the White Pass. It was likely that neither of them would have made it through alone, but together they had survived.
Over the next several months the pass would earn a more abysmal name. It would come to be called the Dead Horse Trail and the horrors of having traveled it would remain in the minds of all of those who journeyed there for the rest of their lives. What Joseph and Alice had witnessed was only the beginning. In the days to come the trail would be paved with the bones of pitiful animals and failed prospectors and with the bodies of those who never found their fortunes.
Once they had climbed down into the town they had to pick their way slowly past the masses of prospectors that had yet to begin their journey through the pass. The area was populated with men, women and animals setting out on the gold rush. Joseph could not believe the difference in the little settlement. What was once a single street of only a few buildings now was now a community buzzing with dozens of tents and buildings made from all sorts of materials. The signs varied from bits of timber with charcoal words scrawled upon them to framed canvases that had been painted and carved professionally. Joseph wondered how many had traveled to begin new businesses in the growing town and he knew it had only just begun.
They walked along the main street, a wide avenue of thick mud overloaded with wagons and horses and hundreds of people. There were saloons and shops and tents of all sizes. People shouted and horses panicked and Joseph kept Alice’s hand in his own, pulling her close to him several times.
He headed directly for the water. He wanted a vessel out of Mooresville as quickly as possible. Passengers disembarked from steamers and paddleboats, hauling supplies. Joseph looked for a ship that looked as though it had unloaded all of its passengers. If there were this many eager to get to Mooresville then the ships would be moving quickly to shuttle them here while there was no ice. He wanted out on the first boat that was headed back. He didn’t even care what their destination was as long as it was not Alaska or Canada.
When he saw a well-kept steamship in the distance he hurried Alice along.
“I want passage out,” he told the first officer he saw on the dock.
“Giving up already?” the officer asked.
“My wife is expecting and we need to get home. To what port does this ship sail?”
“Portland,” the sailor replied, directing them to a ticket office on the dock.
Joseph took Alice’s hand and led her away, speaking to her privately.
“I’m going to use whatever cash we have. I don’t want to show any gold if we can help it.”
Alice nodded and they went to purchase their tickets.
Both of them gasped when the ticket master gave them the price of passage.
“You cannot be serious!” Joseph said.
“Welcome to the gold rush,” the man in the booth smiled.
Joseph handed him every bit of their cash.
“Ship leaves in the morning.”
“When can we board?” Joseph asked.
“You can board anytime you like but the rooms won’t be heated until early morning and the dining room will not open before six a.m. tomorrow.”
Joseph pulled Alice aside again.
“There’s nearly nothing left to eat in the rucksacks and I don’t want to unpack any of the gold until we reach Portland. Would you be alright with the food we have?”
“Joseph, we’re nearly starved. We should eat now and not wait until the morning. We’ll need cash in Portland as well. Here.” She pulled the nugget from the hem of her parka. “Let’s go put our packs on the ship. You wait there and I will buy food.”
“Alone?” he asked.
“Yes, if anyone asks I can say a man gave it to me for sex. No one has to know we found any gold. I know how to do this. I’ll bri
ng food back to the ship. Let’s go.”
Joseph looked around. There were plenty of women on the street. Some were prospectors and some were clearly dancehall girls and prostitutes. He saw that they passed unmolested and so he agreed hesitantly to her plan. They walked up the gangplank onto the ship.
They were directed to their cabin and stepped inside. The small room had one bed and a tiny window. It definitely was cold.
Alice removed her parka, smoothed her tunic and then undid her braids. Joseph saw that her cheeks and lips were badly chapped and wondered what he looked like himself.
She assured him that she would return shortly with plenty of food and hurried down the corridor.
Chapter Thirty-Five
Alice entered the general store and was surprised that, despite the makeshift exterior, inside it was neat and well organized. She walked up to the counter and found a clerk, neat and cleanly shaved. For a moment she tried to imagine Joseph in his own shop as he waited to serve his customers. She thought he was likely very good at it once.
“Good evening.” The shop owner smiled broadly.
“Hello,” Alice replied, looking around. “Do you accept gold for payment?”
“The shop owner smiled broadly. “You discovered gold?” he asked expectantly.
“In a manner,” she said in a hushed tone and leaned closer. “A man gave me this to me to have sex with him. I don’t think he knows what it’s worth. May I use it to shop please and take the difference in cash?” She opened her palm revealing the bright nugget.
“I see,” the shopkeeper fidgeted slightly. “That is sizeable. Please select what you like and I’ll put it on the scale.”
Alice waited while the man weighed the nugget. Though she had no idea what the gold was worth, she thought that if she stayed close, he might imagine she knew more than she did. When he wrote the amount down on the slip she nearly gasped out loud.
“Very well.” Alice tried to sound casual. “I’ll pick up a few things and we’ll settle up when I’m finished.”
Since she had no means to prepare a meal, Alice chose canned peaches and several dried foods. She collected a tin of rich cookies and a fresh baked loaf of bread, some fresh churned butter and several sliced meats.
“Where might I find a prepared meal that I might take with me?” she asked at the counter. The shop owner directed her to a restaurant up the street, packaged her groceries neatly in a large basket and handed her cash. Alice slipped it into her waistband and hurried from the store. She wondered if Joseph had known the worth of her nugget and wished she had asked before leaving.
When she entered the restaurant she thought she would faint from hunger at the smell of the food.
She chose from the menu carefully and asked that the meals be wrapped for travel. Before long, a waitress appeared with two carefully wrapped plates and two large jars of hot coffee which Alice set into her basket.
When she returned to the ship Joseph was frantic with worry. “What took you so long? I was ready to try to put on both packs and come looking for you. Where did you get all of that stuff?” He frowned and looked at her suspiciously.
“I don’t want to know what you are imagining! Sit down on the bed.” She pulled out the jars of coffee and Joseph’s eyes flew open.
“Is that..?” he said.
“Open it.” Alice smiled.
The smell of the rich coffee filled the tiny cabin.
“And since, I really have no idea how you like your coffee when not in the wilderness, I brought fresh cream and sugar as well.”
Joseph held the jar under his nose. “This is just fine,” he said, taking a gulp of the coffee.
“And I got these.” Alice set one of the plates down in front of him and pulled back the wrapping revealing thick slices of roasted moose smothered in a rich brown gravy, a large mound of whipped white potatoes and a generous ear of corn.
“You got all of this with that one nugget?” He took the fork that was wrapped with the meal and tasted the meat.
“And all of this. And this.” Alice pointed inside the basket and then pulled the stack of cash from her belt. She set it all on the bed.
“What? Are you sure?” Joseph asked.
“Do you have any idea what the gold is worth?” Alice scooted up onto the bed across from him and opened her own meal. She felt a bit dizzy as she bit into the first mouthful.
“I had sold a small nugget I found right before I met you. Not nearly as large as that nugget and not worth as much, but this surprises me.”
Alice swore that as he ate his meal, his color had already begun to return. Now she was certain of what she did not want to admit on the trail. She knew that they both were starving.
They enjoyed their meal and laughed for the first time in weeks. Soon they were complaining how full their stomachs were and speculating what their cache of gold was really worth.
“I thought about trying to sell the claim here in Mooresville, but now I think we should go ahead and leave and sell it in Oregon,” Joseph said.
“Maybe you should keep it and hire someone to mine it?” Alice said.
“Maybe I should know the value of that gold,” Joseph laughed.
After they had eaten their fill, they lay on the bed together, Alice with her head on his chest.
“We made it out,” she said softly.
“We did. Had a few scares though,” he remarked.
“How are you feeling? I was worried on the switchback trail.”
Joseph tried to remember. “It was like my mind just tried to shut down and nothing made sense. At one point I was sure you had fallen down the cliff side and that I had just let you go. I couldn’t think straight.”
“You saved my life,” she said.
“You may have saved my mind,” Joseph closed his eyes.
Alice unpacked their bags, too excited to rest and laid out their damp clothing to dry out. In the morning, when the ship’s boilers were fired up, the room would warm. She took the driest of the blankets and those from the foot of the bed, removed her tunic and climbed into the bed beside him. Joseph pulled her close as he slept and Alice drifted off quickly.
Chapter Thirty-Six
The steamship’s whistle blew in the early morning fog and, when Alice opened her eyes, Joseph was sitting on the side of the bed.
“Good morning!” She sat up and smiled. The room was warmed and, although it smelled of their damp clothing, she found it wonderful to have slept in a real bed.
“I’m thinking of taking part of that money and getting another room,” he said seriously. Joseph had spent one too many mornings waking up aroused beside her. This morning had been the worst yet. He’d eaten and restored some of his strength and that, combined with the warmth and comfort of the bed, had him more excited than ever and the torture of it was more than he could take. “It’s not you, it’s me.” He hung his head.
“What does that mean? You can certainly get your own room if you like, but explain what you mean, or why. You can tell me.”
“I’m not open like you are about those kind of things.” He cleared his throat.
“Should I guess?” Alice sat up in the bed. She had changed from the long johns into her own lingerie before getting into the bed.
The sight of her sitting up in her camisole was too much for Joseph.
“No, you don’t need to guess. When I wake up in the morning I cannot control my body’s reaction to you next to me. I guess eating last night made me feel better. Better all over,” he scowled.
“You woke up aroused?” Alice chuckled.
“I don’t see why this is amusing,” he said.
“That’s wonderful!” Alice laughed. “I was beginning to think nothing worked. That’s great news.”
He looked at her curiously. “It’s not funny.”
“I am not laughing because it’s funny, Joseph, of course not. I’m glad you’re healthy enough for that to happen. It just goes to show you how starving we really were. Your
body is trying to heal.”
“I suppose,” he grunted.
“Can I see?” Alice leaned over.
“Stop it!” He stood up suddenly.
“You can’t blame me for trying.” Alice shrugged her shoulders. “Sit down,” she said. “I won’t do it again.”
She sighed deeply. “You can get your own cabin if you really want, or I will. I understand, Joseph. I don’t have to like it, but I understand. Sooner or later I suppose I need to learn how to sleep alone.”
“You’re not angry?”
“Disappointed, yes, but not angry. If it makes you happy then you should.”
Joseph dressed and left the room and Alice sat alone on the bed staring at the door after he left.
“Listen to yourself,” she said aloud. “Sooner or later he’s going to be gone. Face it and start moving on.”
She got out of the bed and tried to find some clean clothing. She noticed that he had left both packs with the gold with her.
He returned shortly, announcing that he had been able to get the cabin directly next door and they sat on the bed enjoying fruit from the basket.
“We have money to have a hot breakfast in the dining room if you like,” Joseph said.
“I’d like that. I think we should eat our way back to civilization. I also want to put that salve on our hands every evening. Maybe we can get your hands soft before you get home.”
Joseph looked down at his hands. “Alright,” he said.
Alice enjoyed a hot bath on the steamship and changed into clean clothing. She had decided not to wear the one dress that she still owned to the dining room. Joseph had few clothing choices and she didn’t want to be dressed well while he still looked so ragged. They would be at sea several days and she thought she’d just enjoy the simplest luxuries on the ship and then think about new or nice things to wear when they docked in Portland.
Ill Repute Page 14