by craziebabe45
At the same time, she couldn't risk bringing another person into her downwards spiral. If Ramsey knew the terrible things Jack had done to both her and Bekah, it wouldn't be pretty.
"Are you sure?" he asked taking a few tentative steps into the room.
"I'm fine," she murmured. It wasn't believable though. She was practically naked sitting in a crumpled heap on his floor looking as if she had been crying. And she had been crying. Normally she didn't look too bad afterwards, but she had rubbed her face so fiercely that it was obvious something had happened to her.
She glanced back up and met his worried gaze. "You don't look fine." He took another step forward.
"Thanks," she muttered sarcastically.
"I didn't mean it like that. I just meant…" he trailed off.
"I know what you meant."
He cleared the space between them in a quick stride and squatted in front of her. "Please let me make it better. I hate seeing you this way," he whispered affectionately, reaching out and cupping her cheek.
"Then don't look at me," she said pulling herself away from his touch.
"I can't help but look at you."
"Yes you can."
"No I can't," he said leaning in closer. "You are the most beautiful thing I've ever laid eyes on."
"Beauty is only skin deep," she quipped not letting herself get suckered into his sweet talk.
"Not on you."
"You don't even know me."
"And you don't know me. Yet we've gone on two dates and we've kissed. I know you feel something for me. You just don't know what it is yet," he told her sitting next to her on the floor.
Lexi shook her head. "You're right. I don't know you and I don't know what I feel."
"Then let me show you," he said leaning forward and capturing her lips in his own.
Lexi groaned deep in her throat wondering how she had gotten herself into this mess. Here she was going back and forth between two guys. One who she felt some semblance of a spark for, but couldn't allow herself to get involved with. The other she had loved for as long as she had known him and all he did was continue to hurt her over and over again. This, being here right now, was so wrong.
Misreading her groan, Ramsey took this as encouragement and deepened the kiss. He let his tongue slide into her mouth and flick against her tongue. His hands buried themselves into her thick mass of curls pulling her face closer to his. She couldn't stay unresponsive as he expertly maneuvered against her mouth. It was as if some kissing instinct had awakened in her and she tilted her head giving him a better angle.
Her mind was so frazzled from the events of the night, but still she knew this was wrong. "Ramsey," she muttered against his lips.
As soon as it came out of her mouth, she knew he would take it as encouragement. His name had come out breathy and seductive when she had been going for questioning or even angry.
"Mmm," he moaned against her lips letting one hand trail down her neck, across her slight shoulder, gently graze the side of her breast, before resting strongly on her waistline. She couldn't keep her breath from hitching as his large hands staked a claim on her body.
She knew she should cry out and stop him from continuing to show his apparent interest in her. But, even though she knew it was wrong, she truly enjoyed having him adore her like this. Her mind went into overdrive as she thought about how wrong her actions were in that moment. But before she could even push him away, he snuck his arm up under her legs and effortlessly hoisted her into the air. She cried out in surprise breaking away from his mouth. The sweet taste of peppermint lingered on the tip of her tongue.
He carried her to the foot of the bed and gently laid her back against the soft down comforter. She was distinctly aware of her nakedness as she stretched out across the bed. There was so little clothing between them leaving her in a very precarious position. From her angle, she could see the bulge in his boxer briefs growing at the sight of her. She couldn't help but smile at his reaction. Of course, she knew it was the wrong reaction. All she seemed to be doing was sending him wrong signals, but she couldn't help it. Very few women wouldn't have smiled at that moment.
His hands moved forward and clutched onto her hip bones. Then he dipped his head down and began kissing upwards from her navel. Slowly but surely he moved around her belly button, up between the curves of her breasts, to the base of her neck, across her jaw line, and then, finally, back to her lips. She felt him press against her as he coaxed a reaction out of her tender lips. His hands roamed her body taking in ever curve of her skin. She could feel him urging her on, aching for her body. He interlaced their fingers and pressed her arms above her head leaving her completely vulnerable. He began a slow grind against her never letting up his amazing kisses.
Ramsey left her hands above her head and began to roam lower and lower until his fingers were feather light against her inner thighs. "Ramsey, I…" she got out before he was kissing her again. His gentle hands began making circle motions against the sensitive skin trailing closer to her most sensitive area.
Fire alarms were going off in her head at his advances, and she knew she needed to stop. In fact, she really wanted to stop. After everything she had been through tonight, she could not add this to the list of stupid things for the evening. She pushed against his chiseled chest, but she might as well have been pushing on a brick wall for all he noticed. One finger moved closer and pressed against her opening veiled only by her black thong. He didn't do anything more than rest there, but she was already wet with anticipation…an anticipation that she would never let come to fruition.
She turned her head to pull away from his demanding kisses. "Stop," she whispered lacking the conviction she felt. He had already hooked his finger under her underwear and was massaging her wet spot. Her body arched of its own accord and a moan escaped her at the pleasurable feeling. She was sore from her earlier encounter, but he was being so gentle she hardly noticed.
"What did you say?" he asked expertly inserting two fingers deep inside of her without allowing her enough time to answer. She couldn't believe how amazing he felt and this was just the foreplay. She needed to stop or she was going to regret her actions.
"I said stop," she murmured attempting to wiggle away from him, but he had his other hand locked securely against her hip preventing her from moving.
"But you like it. You're enjoying it."
"No," she said shaking her head as her lower half convulsed with pleasure.
"Your body is telling me otherwise and I haven't even gone any farther."
"You can't…go any…farther," she gasped out.
He sighed letting his head fall forward but halting his movements inside of her. His hot breathe gave away his already heated desire for her. "Are you sure?" he asked wiggling his fingers playfully.
She gasped. "Yes…"
"You want me to stop?"
"Yes."
He sighed against her heavier this time, but extracted his hand from her lower extremities. He rolled over and laid next to her his chest heaving up and down with the effort of following her orders. She could tell he was expelling a good deal of exertion keeping him from her when he was already hard and ready for her.
Lexi hopped up off the bed and shimmied back into her ruined dress forgetting that Ramsey had given her new, clean clothes to change into. "I have to get out of here," she said reaching for the door.
"What?" he cried hopping off the bed in surprise. "You just got here."
"I know, but I have to leave."
"Don't go. I'll be good. I won't do anything else," he pleaded with her meeting her at the door.
"This isn't about you," she muttered wrenching the door open.
"Then it's about Jack," he said catching her off guard.
She stumbled just managing to catch herself on the door frame. "It doesn't matter what it's about. I just have to leave."
He could see that he had touched on the right subject just by her aggressive response. "Where are you goin
g to go?'
"I'll figure it out," she said walking out of the room, through the hallway, and down the stairs. She could feel him following her, but she didn't look backwards.
"You shouldn't go running off in the middle of the night."
"I can do whatever I want," she cried striding across the living room.
"I know you can. I just want you to be safe," he said quietly.
She bit down on the inside of her cheek to keep from saying anything she might regret. He was just looking out for her, and she knew that. However, getting into any sort of physical relationship with someone was just plain wrong. She had too much baggage. She needed to clear away some of that before anyone else got hurt. "I will be safe," she told him turning and facing him.
"Promise?"
"Yes," she said twisting the knob behind her back and pulling the door open. "Sorry."
Lexi rushed down the stairs that led to his townhouse and out onto the dark city streets. She had forgotten how different New York and Atlanta were. At any given second in New York, she could hail a cab to take her to any destination. Here people had to call for a cab and wait for it to pick you up. In New York, people were constantly on the streets and, where Lexi frequented, she could walk anywhere. In Atlanta, she rarely felt safe walking in even the highest class areas of the city during the day, let alone at night.
She took a deep breath and dialed the number for a cab service. After a few minutes, the cab arrived and carted her to the hotel Chyna was staying in. Lexi had the concierge ring for Chyna, but found that no one was in the room or else Chyna was incapacitated. Either was just as likely. Since she had no proof that she should be in Chyna's penthouse, they refused to give her a key to the room.
"If you won't give me a key, can I just stay in your lobby until she gets back?" Lexi asked exasperated.
The woman looked at her condescendingly obviously taking in her smeared make-up and torn dress in a rather negative fashion rather than seeing the several hundred dollar material. "That is typically not permitted."
"Do you really want one of your A-list clients angry at you, when Chyna finds out that you treated her best friend this poorly?" Lexi asked smoothly.
Her face shifted into a line of worry. Individuals who came to the hotel and rented the penthouse suite were few and far between. It was unlikely this woman wouldn't want to accommodate them. "Very well. When Ms. Van der Wal returns and we can confirm your identity, then we can allow you into her room. If you would like a room of your own, we could arrange that. Otherwise you will have to wait."
Lexi sighed heavily and wandered over to a loveseat. She pulled her feet up onto the cushion and rested her head against the arm of the chair. All she wanted to do was forget that tonight had ever happened. A short while later she was being shaken on her shoulder and someone was saying her name. Lexi's eyes fluttered open and she realized, somewhat unbelievably, she had fallen asleep. Her neck was sore from the uncomfortable position, but her mind was, at least, still. She must have been exhausted to have fallen asleep that quickly.
"You alright chica?" Chyna asked looking at her anxiously.
"A little sore." What an understatement. "But I'll be alright. Can we just go upstairs?"
"Yea sure," Chyna agreed helping Lexi to her feet. "Did they give you any trouble?" Chyna asked staring daggers at the concierge.
"No, they were fine. They did exactly as I expected," Lexi replied following Chyna to the elevators.
The two girls took the elevator to the top floor and Chyna let them into her suite. All Lexi wanted to do was to crash out for the next several hours. She was both physically and mentally exhausted. Chyna had other ideas though. She obviously had all the energy from just getting laid that Lexi was lacking. And even though she needed her mandated seven hours of beauty sleep, she didn't seem ready for that to begin.
"Can you just spit it out so I can go to sleep?" Lexi asked resting her head back against the couch.
Chyna bit down on her bottom lip as she stared uncomfortably at her friend. "What the hell happened to you? You look like a train wreck. You should have seen the way those people were looking at you downstairs. God, you could have been a hooker for all they knew. A hooker wearing amazing clothes but still…"
Lexi rolled her eyes not caring much what others thought about her. "I had a rough night."
"I'll say. Just look at you."
"Thanks Chy. I got it," she mumbled irritated.
"Then what happened?"
Lexi sighed wavering between a lie and the truth. "Jack and I slept together."
Chyna's mouth dropped open. "No! When?" Lexi lowered her eyes to the floor. "Tonight?" Chyna squeaked. "How could you?"
"You know the answer to that."
"You said you weren't going to."
"I hadn't planned on it. This obviously wasn't planned," she said gesturing around her.
"But Alexa," Chyna scolded.
"Don't use that voice with me," she growled. "Things didn't go exactly as planned anyway." Things definitely did not go as planned. She hadn't planned on sleeping with him. She hadn't planned on falling for him…again. She hadn't planned on her night with Ramsey. She hadn't planned on any of it.
"Did he hit you?" Chyna asked fear obvious in her voice. "You look like shit."
"What? No! God no," Lexi exclaimed running her hands through her hair. "He just…he was really cold to me afterwards."
"Like how?" Chyna asked concerned. She could tell that her friend was a mess and she was at a loss for how to help her.
"I don't know. He said this didn't change things," Lexi attempted to explain.
"What does that mean?" Chyna asked aggravated.
"I think it means he needs more time to decide what he wants which makes sense. It just came out wrong," Lexi said trying to convince herself too.
"I doubt it."
"Chyna," Lexi said warningly.
"No, you listen to yourself. He fucked you then pretty much told you that you didn't mean anything to him. How could you think otherwise?"
"He said he still needed time. He told me he wanted to be with me. Chyna, they can't be together. I have to stop this. He can't do what he did to me and expect not to have to make a decision," she told her vehemently.
"Alexa just stop. You can't think like that. You cannot break them up."
"But he wants to be with me. A part of him still wants to be with me."
"You really cannot believe him, can you?" Chyna asked scrunching her perfectly waxed eyebrows together.
"He's never lied to me before," Lexi said but doubt was in her voice.
"Are you sure?"
"He hasn't lied to me in six years. Why would he start now?" Lexi asked trying to force a sense of determination.
"I just…don't know," she said biting her lip and looking away.
"What are you getting at Chyna?" Lexi couldn't keep the venom out of her voice. She wasn't some naïve twit. She knew what the consequences of her actions could be.
"Look maybe he never lied directly, but that didn't mean that he was telling you the whole truth," Chyna told her.
Lexi sighed. She had thought of that. In fact, a part of her wondered if maybe everything he ever said to her had some part of a lie in it. Just because he wasn't flat out lying to her, didn't mean it wasn't a lie regardless. But she couldn't let herself get caught up on that. He was the same Jack she had always known, and he loved her. No matter how difficult the past week…the past year and a half had been there was a part of him that would always love her. She just needed to harness that affection and make him realize that was what he had always wanted…what he still wanted.
"Did you forget that this was all your idea in the first place," Lexi asked evading Chyna's last statement.
"Goddamn, chica, I sent you up here to get over the fucking douche bag, not to fall in love with him again."
"Well, I'm not sure I ever stopped loving him."
"You don't know what you're saying," Chyna said shaki
ng her head miserably.
"I know perfectly well what I am saying. I know exactly how I feel about Jack."
"You're acting like a teenager. Pull yourself together. You don't need this guy to feel loved. There are plenty…"
Lexi interrupted, "Oh don't feed me there are plenty of other fish in the sea line."
"But there are," Chyna cried. "Have you not seen the way Ramsey looks at you?"
Lexi rolled her eyes, but her heart was aching at the admission. She couldn't tell Chyna what had happened between them. The news that they had almost slept together would only fuel her passion. And she was stuck with Jack. No matter what he had done or how confused he was. He held her heart, even when it was breaking. "Don't talk to me about Ramsey."
"Well then don't act like Jack is the only person who has ever looked at you like you're a goddess."
"Just because Ramsey feels this way about me doesn't mean it is reciprocated," Lexi cried back.
"Then explain what happened out on the balcony."
Lexi blushed. If Chyna knew the rest of what had happened, she would never hear the end of it. "That was a mistake."
"It didn't look like it."
"I slept with Jack right afterwards. What does that tell you?"
"That you are a very confused person!"
"I'm not confused. I know exactly what I want."
"I didn't want to have to tell you this," Chyna said shaking her head fiercely.
"What?" Lexi asked barely listening to her. All she wanted to do was get this conversation over with and sleep. She had had a very long night and just wanted to get this over with.
"I heard some of Jack's friends talking about him and Bekah," she trailed off.
"And?"
"There are rumors of them getting married."
"Yeah. Isn't that why I'm here in the first place?" Lexi asked dumbfounded as to why Chyna was even bringing this up to her again. She was here to convince Bekah that Jack was ready for commitment. Well she certainly hadn't done that. If anything she had confused him more.
"I know, but I think he's going to do it."
"What?" Lexi questioned staring at her like she was a Martian.