Murder & Mayhem in Goose Pimple Junction

by Amy Metz

  “You’ve never behaved this way at home! What’s the matter with you?” He was down on the floor, looking at her eye-to-eye. Ezzie whined. Her tongue took a big, wet swipe at his nose.

  “Jack, she’s licked this carton clean. It was almost full! How did she do that? I’ll bet her little tummy hurts. That's a lot of ice cream, not to mention chocolate's not good for dogs. Do you think we should take her to the vet?”

  “No, I think we should just watch her. Tess, I’m so sorry. She really never has done anything like this at my house. I don’t know what’s come over her.”

  “Maybe she’s rebelling. She doesn’t want to stay here.”

  “Now who wouldn’t want to stay here with you? She’s got it made in the shade!”

  “Mmm hmmm.” Tess didn’t sound convinced. She walked toward the door. “C’mon. Let’s find you some dry clothes.”

  She showed Jack into the guest bedroom. “I think there are some gym shorts and t-shirts in here. Why don’t you see what you can find in the dresser, and then we can stick your clothes in the dryer. I’ll change, too, and meet you back in the den.” The look on Jack’s face said he’d rather stay in the bedroom with her, but he just nodded as she closed the door.

  Tess changed into dry clothes, and went to find Jack’s wet ones, but he’d already put them in the dryer. She joined him in the den. He was sitting on the floor next to the open picnic basket, his back up against the couch, Ezzie at his feet. He’d lit three large candles that were already in the room, leaving on only one small lamp. Even though the light was low, it was apparent he was larger than her son, because the t-shirt he had on was form fitting, and the gym shorts were too short.

  “What are you smiling at?” Jack asked her.

  “I’m just really enjoying tonight. I see we’re picking up where we left off.” She sat down next to him, her back leaning against the couch.

  “Well . . . almost . . . “ Jack said playfully, turning to her.

  “Did you say something about dessert?” she asked innocently.

  Jack pulled out two huge brownies and a baggie full of green M&M’s from the picnic basket. “I can’t take credit for these brownies. They’re from Mrs. Ward—part of the outpouring of community TLC.”

  “Jack,” she laughed, “I can’t possibly eat all of that! I can’t believe you went to this much trouble.” She took a huge bite. “But thank you! Oh my gosh, this is delicious.” She looked at the bag of green M&M’s in Jack’s hand and cocked her head. “Why green M&M’s?”

  Jack got a sly grin on his face as he opened the baggie and popped an M&M in his mouth. “A buddy of mine told me he once got lucky with green M&M’s.”

  “Oh reeeeeally?” Tess said, looking him in the eye and tossing a few in her mouth.

  “Tess, I want to say somethin’.”

  She swallowed hard and looked over at him, waiting for what was to come.

  “I think you know that I’m attracted to you as allgitout. I think you’re a beautiful, smart, sexy woman. The more I get to know you, the more I like you, and the more I want to know. But I don’t want to rush you. I may not know the reasons why, but I know you’re hesitant to get involved. I was beginning to think I just wasn’t your type. But after that kiss . . . “ Jack’s voice trailed off, and he shook his head, looking down at the floor. He looked back at her and said softly, “After that kiss, I’m thinking that the attraction is mutual, but beyond that, I’m thinking that I really want to put my hands all over you.” Tess gulped.

  He took the brownie out of her hands and set it aside. Moving closer, he put one arm on the sofa behind her head. “What are you thinking?”

  Tess dropped her head onto his shoulder. “I’m thinking let’s put the cards on the table, Jack. No games.”

  “Okay . . . “

  “Would you tell me why you got divorced?” Her head was still on his shoulder as she looked up at him.

  “If you promise to believe me.”

  “I promise.”

  He took a deep breath, held it, and then let it out slowly. “I’ve heard some rumors around town, and I know some people think I cheated on my wife. The fact is—Corrine was unfaithful to me.”

  Tess was not expecting that. She sat up straight and turned so she could look at him better. “Oh Jack, I’m so sorry.” She shook her head and looked down at her hands. “And here I was believing the rumors and thinking you were the unfaithful one. I'm such an idiot.” Her eyes snapped back to his face. “You weren’t unfaithful, too, were you?”

  “Not once. Not ever.”

  “Well then, we share something in common, Jack. My husband cheated on me. Several times. I think I was the last to know. Talk about a girl with her head in the sand.”

  “Yeah, well, I think I was one fry short of a Happy Meal, myself,” Jack said. “It started with her buying anything and everything. We had a Lexus and a BMW in the garage, but she went out and bought a Mercedes. She bought tons of clothes and started going weekly to the spa for facials and massages. She wanted us to join the country club; she wanted a maid; she was out of control. We stopped talking and started being roommates. It was actually kind of a relief when I found out about her affair. I was glad to have an excuse to end the marriage. We’re better friends now than we were when we were married.”

  “I saw you with her the other day. She’s beautiful.”

  “Yeah, she and her boyfriend came to see me about some crazy investment scheme. I told ‘em to take a long walk off a short pier.” Jack scooted closer to Tess again. “I said it nicely, of course,” he added. She laughed.

  “Jack, I just don’t want to rush into anything. I was totally blindsided by my husband’s secret life. I felt betrayed and stupid for being so trusting. I was just getting my sea legs back and then you came along. To tell you the truth, you were right when you said I was scared of you.”

  He trailed a finger down her cheek to her collarbone and back up. Their eyes locked. A burp escaped from Ezzie, who was lying a few feet away. They both laughed.

  “That should have been a mood stopper,” Jack said, still looking at her intently. “But even that can’t distract me.” His fingers played in her hair, while his thumbs caressed her face.

  “I had a nice time tonight, Jack. Thank you for going to so much trouble. I can’t remember the last time I felt so utterly spoiled.”

  “The night’s not over yet, ya know.” He cupped her face with his hands and brought his lips to hers.

  Before she knew what she was doing, she’d moved onto his lap and was kissing him like there was no tomorrow. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her tightly into him. She clutched his neck and pushed into him but wanted to be even closer, so she moved to straddle him, never breaking the kiss. He groaned and deepened the kiss, kissing her harder, moving his hands up and down her back. She could feel him as she pressed into him, moving slowly, making them both moan.

  As Jack unbuttoned Tess's shirt, she pulled his t-shirt up, running her hands over his chest. It had been forever since she’d felt this intense desire, since she’d felt this desirable. Her shirt was untucked and unbuttoned, and Jack's hands were moving up.

  Then Ezzie jumped up, barking as the phone rang, shattering the moment. Tess broke the kiss and sat with her head down for a few seconds before reluctantly pulling herself off his lap and crossing the room to answer the phone. Ezzie stealthily inched over and snatched Tess’s brownie, devouring it in seconds.

  “Hello?” she said huskily, as Jack watched her. She modestly pulled her shirt together. “Martha Maye! Hi!” She looked over at Jack, who was mouthing, “Tell her you’re busy.”

  “No, no, it’s not too late,” she said, shaking her head at him.

  “Tomorrow. Tell her tomorrow,” he whispered.

  Turning her back to Jack, she said, “Sure, Jack’s here, too, come on over if you want . . . Okay, see you in a few minutes.” She hung up the phone and turned to Jack. He’d thrown his head back on the seat of the couch an
d was looking at the ceiling.

  “I guess you heard . . . “

  “Tess,” Jack said without lifting his head. “You’re killing me.”

  Well, Slap My Head And Call Me Silly

  turrible: adjective tur-uh-buhl terrible

  That rain kicked up the humidity somethin’ turrible.

  GOOSE PIMPLE GAZETTE

  December 20, 1935

  JOHN HOBB FOUND SHOT TO DEATH

  Body Found Near Bridge On Road In Parked Auto

  Death of Prominent Young Man Remains Mystery

  Funeral services for John Hobb, killed Sunday night by an unknown person near the Goose Creek Bridge were held Wednesday afternoon at two o’clock at the First Methodist Church. The Rev. Otis J. Baker conducted the services. A quartet with Abe Barber, Reverend Baker, J. E. Walker, and Charles Williams sang several selections. Burial followed in the church cemetery.

  No new developments have been uncovered in the case at this time, but the department is working overtime for answers to this mysterious and tragic murder of the young banker, upstanding citizen, and family man.

  John Hobb, thirty-three years old, and General Auditor for the First National Bank of Goose Pimple Junction, had been employed by the bank for the past twelve years. He was found shot to death at the wheel of his automobile Sunday night, near the Goose Creek Bridge. His wife found his body around eleven o’clock on Sunday evening, December fifteenth. It is believed he had been dead for about four hours. No motive for the murder is known, and clues as to the guilty party are scarce.

  According to reports, John Hobb took his family to Sunday evening church services about six o’clock and intended to drive out to Duckbill on some business, returning to the church to take his family home. His wife was worried when he failed to come back, and late that night when he still had not returned home, she became alarmed. Reverend Baker, Mrs. Baker, and Mrs. Hobb went to search for him. His car was discovered parked on the side of the road, near the Goose Creek Bridge with the lights burning and the motor running. Mrs. Hobb discovered his body slumped over the wheel. According to witnesses, his revolver was in his hand, but it had not been fired.

  The police were notified immediately and rushed to the scene of the crime. Three bullet holes were found in the glass of the car. Mr. Hobb had suffered a single gunshot to the head, with entry just behind his right ear and exiting from just below his left temple. An officer was placed at the car to preserve the integrity of the crime scene, and his body was removed to Pearson’s funeral parlor. A coroner’s inquest held Monday morning found that Mr. Hobb died at the hands of an unknown party. Bloodhounds were brought to the scene, but failed to pick up any trail. Fingerprints were taken as evidence, in an effort to discover the killer.

  According to passersby, Mr. Hobb’s car was seen parked about seven o’clock at the spot where it was found. Several people who saw the car by the side of the road earlier in the evening assumed it was preparing to turn around and thought nothing was wrong. Neighbors nearby did not hear shots fired, which leads officials to believe that the actual shooting might have occurred somewhere else and the car driven to Goose Creek Bridge where the car was found.

  Family and friends have no theories as to the reason for the murder. Mr. Hobb was a young businessman of highest regard and had no enemies, as far as it is known. He was the son of the late C.C. Hobb of the Jake Creek section of Mallard County, and is survived by his widow, Mrs. Maye Lawrence Hobb; four children, Johnny, Samuel, Ima Jean and Louetta, all under twelve years old. His mother, three brothers, five sisters, and numerous relatives also survive.

  [ July 2010 ]

  “Oooh Lordy! It’s sa hot the hens are layin’ hard-boiled eggs.” Martha Maye stepped into Tess’s house, wiping her face and neck with a hankie. “That rain kicked up the humidity somethin’ turrible, and that’s what’ll getcha more ‘n the sun. It’s so sticky out there you can purt near wring out the air.” She reached down to pet Ezzie, who’d come to the door to protect Tess.

  “You mean you walked all the way here?” Tess asked.

  “Oh yeah, honey, it ain’t that far; besides, it quit rainin’, and I needed the exercise.” She patted her behind as emphasis and walked into the den where she saw Jack, the candles, and the picnic basket. “Well slap my head and call me silly! I interrupted somethin’, didn’t I?” She looked from Jack to Tess. “Ah, shoot. Why didn’t ya tell me? Say—is there a full moon out? There must be, ‘cause there’s lovers everywhere I look. I passed Pickle and Charlotte on the way here. I don’t know what that girl sees in him. I swan, if that boy had an idea, it would die of loneliness. A course, she’s no state fair prize either; she’s so conceited, if God made one better He forgot to tell her.” Tess unconsciously took a deep breath, in reaction to Martha Maye talking so long and so fast without a breath.

  “Whoa! Martha Maye! Slow down!” Jack stood up.

  “Dj’yer clothes shrink in the rain or somethin’, Jack?” She eyed the short shorts he was wearing and the shirt that was pulling tight across his chest.

  “Actually, the rain got me soaked, and I borrowed some of Tess’s son’s clothes while mine are in the dryer.”

  “And you’re not interrupting.” Tess put her arm around Martha Maye and directed her to a seat. “Come on in and sit down. Can I get you some tea?”

  “Why that would be lovely, thank you!”

  Tess came back with the tea just as Martha Maye was telling Jack, “It went over like a turd in a punchbowl.”

  “What did?” Tess asked, handing Martha the tea.

  “Talkin’ ta Mama ‘bout her daddy’s murder. She just plain won’t do it. I tried every which way to get into the subject, and she cut me off ever time. But—” She took a sip from her tea, “I did find these in the family Bible.”

  She pulled a book, holding a Zip-loc bag with newspaper clippings, out of her large tote purse. She opened the bag and carefully took out one of the brittle, browned clippings. The title, “John Hobb Is Found Shot To Death Near Bridge” in bold print was at the top. Tess sat next to Jack on the sofa and read the article out loud. Once she finished, the three of them sat in silence for a bit, everyone lost in their own thoughts.

  Martha Maye broke the silence by taking out a second article titled, “Two Women Wounded By Gunfire.” Tess took it from her.

  “The subtitle says, ‘Maye Hobb, Mother Shot, Trevor Hobb Surrenders, Details As To Cause, Events, Hard To Explain.’” Tess read to herself for a minute. “It says your grandmother was wounded in her left breast and arm. Her mother was shot in the neck and neither was expected to live. How horrible.”

  “Mama must have been scared to death. There she was, a little girl who’d already lost her daddy, and it was lookin’ like she was gonna lose her mama, too. And both by gunshots. Mmm, mmm.” Martha Maye shook her head.

  “It says your uncle surrendered voluntarily but wouldn’t make a statement. And then it goes on to say, ‘Maye is John Hobb’s widow, the man who was found dead in his car in December 1935.’ The writer tells about that incident and ends by pointing out the fact that Brick Lynch was out on bond, charged with his murder. It specifically points out that your grandfather testified against Lynch on the robbery charge. This makes it look like the town folk thought it was Lynch who killed him.”

  Jack reached for the pile of fragile newspaper clippings on the coffee table and looked through them. In doing so, he moved his bare foot up against Tess’s under the coffee table. He picked out another article titled, ‘Mrs. Lawrence Dies From Pistol Wound.’ As he read, he stroked her foot with his toes.

  Tess held her leg still and looked at Jack with apologetic eyes, hoping Martha Maye didn’t know what was going on under the table.

  “It looks like your great grandmother died two days after the shooting. Good gracious, she was only fifty-nine years old. This article says she was shot in the neck and her spinal cord was severed. But it looks like by then they felt Maye was expected to live.”

&nbs
p; Tess picked up another article. “This one says that Trevor surrendered to the police. At least there wasn’t a long, drawn out investigation. It looks like the only things the murders had in common was that they happened to the same family and both involved gunshots.” Tess continued to scan the article and moved so she was sitting on her foot, causing Jack to smirk.

  “Or did Trevor kill his brother to pave the way for him to move in on Maye?” Jack asked.

  “They charged Brick Lynch with the murder, but he got off because the judge said the prosecution’s witness couldn’t be believed. Is that right?” Tess asked.

  “Yep, I do remember Mama sayin’ he was slipperier than snot on a doorknob. Mama thinks he got off twice because money greased the palms of a certain governor and a judge.”

  “Does she think Brick Lynch killed her father?”

  “Tessie, I just don’t rightly know for sure.”

  “Do you know if he still has any relatives living in town?” Jack asked.

  “I don’t know of any Lynch folk in town.” Martha Maye ran her hand up and down Ezzie’s back.

  “Wouldn’t necessarily have to be a Lynch. If he had a daughter, she’d have her husband’s name, and the kids would have a different name, too,” Jack pointed out.

  “If the chest is in your mother’s attic, why don’t we give the key a try?” Tess asked.

  “Well, I don’t see what good it would do. Mama said they got a replacement key and didn’t find anything unusual in that trunk.”

  “At least we’d know we had the right trunk.” Tess put the newspaper clippings back in the Ziploc bag.

  “I guess it’s a possibility, if y’all are bound and determined, but it’d have to be sometime when Mama’s not home, and usually when she ain’t home, I’m busier than a moth in a mitten. I’ll have to call ya sometime when it suits. Meantime, I’ll ask around ‘bout any relatives of Lynch.”