“We’ll be there, ” Eve answered.
Lucy smiled. “Of course we’ll be there for you.”
“Is there anything we can do to help you today?” Mariah asked.
She shook her head and ran her hand over her head, where her dreads used to be. She sniffed. “I keep forgetting the hair’s gone.” She nodded to Mariah. “Thanks, but I need to do this by myself. I’ll be okay.”
“Call me if you need me, or us, for anything.”
Eve watched the interchange between them. She was ready to go home, but she had to admit that she would probably miss Soleil most of all. They were so much alike.
She wondered what Faith had left to Soleil. And why Mariah had to be there, especially since Faith had tried to kill both her and her daughter. Eve knew that she would never get the image of Faith pulling the trigger out of her mind. She knew Soleil would never get it out of her heart.
Soleil
Soleil had made arrangements for the body to be taken to the crematory. She didn’t want to be there during the process. They told her it would take between two and three hours. She could be in the flames right now. Faith’s last smoke. She didn’t even want to see the ashes. Faith’s soul disappeared years ago, probably before she even reached her teenage years. Now her body was gone, too.
Soleil went to her apartment to change. As she looked at her backpack, she remembered the things she had taken from Faith’s apartment. She took the backpack to her bedroom and dumped its contents on her bed.
She picked up the dreamcatcher and flicked one of the feathers. What dreams did Faith have? Did she have any goals? What had kept her going besides making the next score or numbing herself with alcohol, drugs and sex?
Soleil took down a wind chime she had in her bedroom window and hung up the dreamcatcher. She shook the chime. The brass bells tinkled lightly until she put the chime on her dresser.
She picked up Faith’s address book. Was there anyone she should notify about Faith’s death? Did Faith have any real friends?
Then she remembered a woman that used to visit them periodically. She had befriended Faith when she arrived in LA. What was her name? She could see the tall, redheaded woman in her mind. Connie. Her name was Connie Dyson.
She opened the book to see if Connie was listed. She looked under the Cs, but the book wasn’t arranged in alphabetical order. She went back to the first page. At the bottom of the page, she saw Connie’s name and phone number written in her mother’s sloppy cursive writing.
Without another thought, she picked up the phone next to the bed and dialed the number.
“Hello?” A little girl answered the phone.
“Is Connie Dyson there?” She held her breath.
“Hold on, please. Who may I say is calling?” The little girl replied by rote, repeating words she had been trained to say.
“Soleil DeSalle.”
“Sol-what? My name is—”
Another voice got on the phone. “Soleil? This is Connie. How are you holding up? I’m so sorry to hear about Faith.”
Soleil was too stunned to speak. How did she already know about Faith?
“Soleil?”
“Who told you about my mother? I haven’t called anyone.”
“Uh, I stopped by to visit her on Saturday and the manager told me.” Connie’s voice was shaky.
“Oh.” For some reason, Soleil didn’t believe her. “I was calling to see if you would be able to come to the cemetery. She is being cremated, and I’m having her remains placed in a niche at Pierce Brothers. I was planning to say a few words there tomorrow afternoon.”
“No, Soleil, I can’t make it. I’m sorry. I really can’t make it.” She sounded like she was ready to cry.
“Okay then. Well. I’ll talk to you later.”
“Wait. Soleil?”
“What?”
“Don’t drink.”
“What?”
“I know what it’s like. I’m an alcoholic, too. Don’t let this push you back there, okay?”
“Okay.”
“Take care sweetheart.” Connie hung up before Soleil could say anything else.
Soleil felt flushed. She had tried not to acknowledge the gnawing feeling going in her stomach, threatening to spread throughout her body. She did want a drink. She craved a drink. She remembered that sip of champagne she had after the tribute concert. She remembered the drinks she had on the day that they had went to Lieberman’s office. She licked her lips. They were dry. She salivated at the thought of a shot of JD or Southern Comfort pouring down her throat. Liquid oblivion would feel so good right now.
I need to go to the gym, she thought. The burning sensation of muscles being pushed to the limit counteracted the desire for a drink. Once she returned from Oklahoma, she had joined a local gym. In the past five years, she had become a regular. Unlike a lot of the women there, she wasn’t afraid of developing visible muscles. She needed muscles to carry guitar cases and amps. Her biceps and her well-defined abdomen didn’t embarrass her. But every so often, a new guy would come into the gym. He would stop to watch her on the machines, intrigued by her strength and beauty. They would try to pick her up, but a loud “fuck-off, asshole,” caused them to scatter.
She shook her head and picked up some pictures from the bed. She looked again at the picture of the little girl that grew up to become her mother. So much abuse. So much pain. From one generation to the next. Maybe that was why the fates had determined she would be sterile, so the abuse would stop with her. As the only child of an only child, the line ended with her. Faith, Hope and Charity, my ass.
She looked at the picture of her with her parents. She placed it facedown on the nightstand. The rest of the things on the bed she placed in the bottom drawer of her dresser.
Now she had to go to the Guitar Center to get the music to her mother’s favorite song. Then she would go to the gym.
Chapter Sixteen
Lucy
Lucy watched as Soleil walked toward them at the cemetery. She was dressed in a bright red mini-dress and flat sandals. She had an acoustic guitar slung over her shoulder. Now she knew why Soleil had been so reticent about cutting her hair. Before, the first thing one noticed about her was her hair. Now it was her body. The dress was only a few inches above her knees, but her long, muscular legs made it look shorter. She had never seen Soleil in a dress before. Now she knew why she never wore them. With her short hair, she looked like a rock-and-roll Amazon.
There was a graveside ceremony being conducted not far from where Lucy stood with Eve and Mariah. When Soleil passed the mourners, all of the men and most of the women turned instinctively to watch her pass. But she never noticed them. In that way, she was just like Mik. Only he saw his beauty as a right, Soleil saw hers as a curse. He used his looks to get what he wanted. Soleil fought her looks to get what she wanted.
She looked at the mourners again. They were all dressed in black. Soleil had called yesterday and asked that they wear bright colors. She had worn a long, purple dress with pink flowers. Eve had worn a bright blue top and a denim skirt she had gotten in Silver Lake. Mariah wore an orange African-print dress with fringe along the sleeves and the mid-calf hem. They looked like they were going to a party instead of a memorial service.
She had hated Faith all of her life, but she wasn’t glad she was dead. She wished that Faith had gotten her life together. She wished Faith had transformed herself into the mother Soleil had wanted her to be.
Faith was gone, but she had left behind scars on all of them. Mariah had physical scars. Eve would never forget witnessing Faith’s suicide. She would always have nightmares threatening to invade her dreams. Soleil’s life had been one big scar, punctuated by the sound of music.
Soleil reached them. “Thanks for coming. You all look great.”
Eve gave Soleil an appraising look. “You look fabulous.”
Lucy and Mariah voiced their agreement. She looked even better up close, with a light touch of cosmetics enhancing
what was already a perfect canvas.
Soleil looked down at the gravestone. “So that’s it, huh?”
Lucy followed her gaze. Faith Dolores Armstrong DeSalle, it read.
Eve looked down, too. “Dolores is such a pretty name,” she said.
Soleil looked at her. “You know what is means in Spanish, don’t you?”
“No.”
Soleil looked into Eve’s eyes. “It means ‘Sorrow.’ ”
Eve looked down again.
“Do you want us to say anything, Soleil?” Mariah asked.
“No, I’m just going to sing her favorite song.” She grabbed the guitar neck and pulled it across her chest.
Soleil strummed a few chords, closed her eyes and started to sing. Lucy felt a chill reverberate through her body. Faith’s favorite song had been “Freebird.”
As Soleil sang, the mourners gathered nearby stopped and turned toward them. Soleil’s voice was so strong, and yet so sweet, it would have made Ronnie Van Zant turn over in his grave. Lucy could feel the hot tears spilling onto her cheeks.
At the end, instead of the long solo, Soleil played some flamenco style runs and a mixture of other styles.
As the sound of the acoustic guitar melted away, Soleil opened her eyes. She coughed and cleared her throat. Lucy held her breath, because it seemed like she was going to spit. Don’t do it, Soleil, she pleaded silently. She touched her sister’s hand, but didn’t look at her.
Soleil took a deep swallow. “Okay. That’s it. Let’s go to lunch.”
Eve
Eve looked around as they entered the upscale restaurant. She could smell the food as soon as Mariah opened the door. She had never been in a soul food restaurant before, but the smells were enticing enough to make her stomach growl.
The diners were a mixture of men and women of various races in business attire, black teenagers in the latest street looks and older black women in dresses and sweaters. Almost all of them looked at them when they entered. It was like Beverly Hills all over again. But this time, Soleil looked even more striking. They stopped in the foyer.
Eve watched a table of young black men in business suits. One of the men dropped his fork when he saw Soleil. He whispered to the other three men and all of them turned admiringly towards her like flowers to the sun. Soleil, of course, ignored them.
A large woman with features like a burnished teak statue came out of the kitchen with her arms open wide. “Mariah!” She beamed at Mariah and gave her an enveloping hug. Even though she had curly salt and pepper hair, it was hard to tell her age.
“Bernice!” Mariah returned the warm hug.
The woman turned her attention to the other three women. “Soleil, honey. You have grown up to be so beautiful!” When she hugged her, she only came up to Soleil’s shoulder.
“Hey, Bernice,” Soleil returned her greeting and the hug.
“Lucille, you look gorgeous, as always.”
Lucy gave the woman a kiss on the cheek. “So do you, Bernice.”
Bernice looked over at her and extended her hand. “You must be the other daughter.”
She smiled. The other daughter, the white girl. “Yes, I’m Eve. I’m pleased to meet you.” Bernice squeezed her hand. The hand was warm and solid, like its owner.
“I hope we didn’t put you out, calling you so late,” Soleil said.
“I always have room for friends. And under the circumstances, I would have made room.”
Eve looked at Lucy. “Was this Faith’s favorite restaurant?”
“No. It’s Soleil’s favorite restaurant.”
Bernice led them to a room at the back of the restaurant. Eve walked behind Soleil so she could watch the reactions. She was amused by the looks Soleil garnered as she followed Bernice. Soleil walked with a long stride and a slight undulation, causing her hips to ripple in the dress. Eve stared at her sister’s head and wavy light brown hair. She had never noticed before that Soleil had four holes in each ear.
Lucy caught her gaze. “I hope someone in here knows CPR,” she whispered.
Bernice sat down with them. “I’m so glad to see y’all.” She held Soleil’s hand. “I didn’t get to go to the concert last week, but my son went. He told me you were magnificent! I’m so proud of you, girl.”
Eve was surprised when Soleil blushed. “Thank you, Bernice.”
“You will have a record deal soon. I get music industry people in here often. I have heard your name come up a lot in the last few days.” She patted Soleil’s hand and dropped it.
She turned her attention to Mariah. “I thought you would have brought Ollie over. I was waiting to hear from you.”
Mariah paled slightly. “Well things came up, and then Faith…” Her voice trailed off.
Bernice stood up. “Let me get some menus. And don’t worry about the prices, I’ll take care of everything.”
Eve listened to the soft jazz playing as Bernice went back to the main room of the restaurant. She looked at Mariah. “Who is Ollie?”
“Olivia. Bernice is Olivia’s cousin.”
She nodded her head. The restaurant was like a calm oasis. No wonder Soleil liked it. The back room was decorated with plants, and there were fresh yellow roses in a cut glass vase on the table.
Bernice came back with four menus. “Soleil, are you going to order your favorite dish?”
Soleil grinned and nodded. “I don’t even have to look at a menu. Liver and onions with lots of gravy, with some collards on the side.” She licked her lips.
Eve frowned. That didn’t sound like a favorite meal to her. It sounded like something your mother would force you to eat as a child.
Lucy caught the look. “Give Eve the same thing,” she said, smiling at her mischievously.
“No, thank you. I would like to see a menu, please.” She knew everyone could sense her discomfort, and she knew her sisters would take advantage of it.
Bernice laughed. “Not everyone likes liver, Eve. I can’t stand it, either.” She handed her a menu.
“I would like your wonderful vegetable stew and some cornbread,” Mariah said, looking up at Bernice.
“Eve, why don’t you order for Miss Lucille, since she was so in a hurry to order for you,” Soleil said, cutting her eyes at Lucy. “She just loves chitterlings.”
“Don’t you dare! I hate those things. I would like a menu, too, please.”
Bernice gave her a menu. “I’ll put in the two orders and then I’ll be right back for the other two.” She walked away.
Eve watched her go into the other part of the restaurant. When she passed the table with the four suited men, one of them motioned her over, nodded to the back room and said something to her. She was sure the man wanted to buy Soleil a drink. Bernice shook her head and continued to walk towards the kitchen.
She looked at the menu. She wanted something light, but nothing on the menu looked light to her. She looked over at Lucy. “What are you getting?”
Lucy glanced up from her menu. “I’m going to indulge myself today. I’m having stuffed pork chops, potato salad and Bernice’s wonderful biscuits.”
Mariah leaned over to look at Lucy’s menu. “They have great fresh fish here, too. And don’t forget to leave room for dessert. They have the best pies and cobblers in the city here.”
“I don’t know much about soul food,” she admitted while looking at Mariah. “What do you suggest?”
“It’s Southern food, Eve. White people in the South eat the same thing. You saw how many white people were sitting in the other room,” Soleil admonished. “And anyway, you aren’t white any more. You are part of the rainbow coalition called the DeSalle family.”
“Yeah, the only person missing is Rani,” Lucy said.
“Rani? Who is Rani?”
“That was Mik’s second wife. She was Indian,” Mariah said.
Eve had forgotten about that short liaison. As soon as her mother had given him a divorce, he had married another woman in LA.
“Where is sh
e now?” Soleil asked.
“She is remarried and living in Chicago. She’s a physician now.” A waiter brought glasses to the table and Mariah acknowledged him with a nod and a smile.
“And her husband knows nothing about her rock and roll past, I bet.”
“He knows all about Mik. She called me when she read about his death in the paper. She wanted to come out, until I told her Sally was handling everything.”
Eve shook her head. “That Sally is some piece of work, isn’t she?”
“She is a nut case,” Lucy said.
Bernice came back to take the remaining orders. She could see the resemblance to Olivia. She wondered if Bernice was going to mention the man or what he said to her. As Lucy placed her order, she looked at the menu again. She hadn’t eaten pork chops since she was a little girl, so she decided to give them a try.
“I’ll have the same as Lucy,” she said when Bernice turned to her.
“Great. That’s a good choice, Eve. I’m sure you will enjoy them.” She turned to Soleil. “One of the young men at a table out there wanted to buy you a drink. But I told him you were in mourning and to leave you alone.” She looked over her wide-rimmed glasses.
Soleil smiled. “Thank you, Bernice,” she said sweetly.
“Well, I didn’t want you to kick his ass if he came back here and tried to pick you up.” She chuckled.
“I wouldn’t do that to you.” She adjusted the top of her dress. “Not in this dress.”
Bernice patted Soleil on the back and continued to chuckle as she walked away.
Lucy looked at Soleil. “And about that dress. Where did it come from? I didn’t know you even owned a dress.”
“I have had this dress for several years. I decided to wear it because red was Faith’s favorite color. I think I must have gained weight since I bought it.”
Eve looked at Soleil. “It looks great, but it does get you noticed.”
“I thought those guys were going to have a heart attack when you walked in,” Lucy added.
“That’s their problem, not mine.” Soleil glanced towards the main room. “Horny fuckers.”
Three Chords, One Song Page 20